Page 75 of Scream (Duchess & Devils #1)

Maksim.

“Raise your arm just a little higher, Duchess.” I whisper into her ear, then place the earmuffs back over them.

I love the way goosebumps erupt on her neck and disappear into the neckline of her sweater.

Sabrina raises her right arm and shoots.

The paper on the line is brought forth again, and this time she’s hit the target a lot closer to the bullseye.

There’s a sheen of sweat on her brow since we’ve been here for hours.

Her arms are tired and trembling. I found out today that while my wife favors her right hand, she is ambidextrous.

Which makes sense with how she can work my dick like a fucking pro and not lose her stride when she switches hands.

I really enjoy my wife.

“Good fucking job, wife. I think that’s enough for today, though. Rossi, Bianchi, and Sasha have gone for the day to be home with their wives, and I would like to go home and have dinner with mine.”

She exhales and looks at the target again. We’ve moved down ten out of the twenty stalls. Sabrina leans back to look at them, then back at me, lower lip coming out in a cute pout. “But I’ve almost gotten it.”

“We can come back the next time they’re able to clear it out for us. For now, you've gotten farther than a lot of first timers do.”

Just then we hear a gunshot coming from the last stall where Parker is standing. Niko brings the target forward, and we go to see he’s hit a perfect fucking bullseye. He grins devilishly. “I still got it.”

“You were a sniper for twelve years.”

“Fuck yeah, I was.” He replies, bringing Sabrina in for a big, wet kiss in front of Niko. She moans softly and leans into it. He reaches down to grab her ass with his empty hand and brings her further into his large body.

Niko looks away and begins whistling.

I roll my eyes, then take the gun still in my wife’s hand that’s pointing to the ceiling. She moans, then abruptly pulls away and wipes at her lip. “Oh, Niko!”

Parker curls over her and kisses her temple. “Apparently, he knows, baby girl. It’s all good. Turns out he’s wondering if Raven has room for a fourth.”

She tips her head back and laughs. “Oh Niko, they would end you. Jonas, especially. You know, Parker has a sister, Rory, she-”

“My sister needs to focus on school , not boys.”

“I’m a man.”

“She’s barely in her twenties. You’re practically a grandfather.”

“I’m barely thirty-four,” he argues.

Sabrina shakes her head. “It’s fine. I think Kallum would like her. Can he sign?”

“I can sign.” Niko replies, and we all stare at him with mouths agape. Aquamarine eyes crawl over us, and his brow rises. “What? I learned in case Raven ever wants a fourth.”

Sabrina puts a hand on his shoulder. “You might be waiting a very long time, Niko.”

Niko sighs. “Just put in a good word for me.”

Her lips form a thin line, and she replies with a “Mmhmm. You bet.”

We put away all the guns after making sure each one has the safety on, empty the magazines, and put the ammo back in their designated boxes. Parker catches up to me. “I think she had a lot of fun.”

“I almost shot Bianchi when he raised his voice at her.”

“She was waving the gun around , Maks. With the safety off . I would’ve yelled at her, too.”

“I would’ve shot you, too.” I reply with an eye roll.

“Fair,” he replies with a smirk.

We make it to the mansion where we’ve been spending more time lately and eat the linguini dinner Veronica left for us.

Sabrina is a little quieter than usual as she twirls the pasta in the spoon with her fork.

It hasn’t escaped me that she hasn’t met my gaze since Rossi told us he’s expecting his next child with his new bride.

And I am dying to look into my wife’s beautiful eyes.

I reach under the table and put a hand on her thigh. “Sabrina?”

“Hmm?” she glances at me but then looks away just as quickly, the fork now scraping the spoon.

I bite my lip, not exactly knowing how to approach this, but just like with everything else, I decide to do it head on and get it outta the way. I put my forkful of linguine down. It clatters a bit when it lands, making her wince. “What’s going on?”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean you’ve scarcely looked at me or talked to me since Rossi told us Samantha is expecting, and I told Rossi we weren’t planning on having children yet.

You’ve been quiet all day. Present, but quiet.

And now you aren’t eating. You’re always hungry, Duchess, so you need to tell me how Parker and I can make it better. ”

She calmly drops the silverware onto her plate and stares down at her food. Silence passes between the three. “It’s not really something you can make better, Maksim. These are possibly irrational thoughts and something I’ll work through with Damon.”

Parker drops his silverware and leans back in his seat.

His mouth twists to the side, then he scrubs his hand over his jaw, swiping it down his face and placing it on the table by his plate.

“Took you years to work through what happened with Kane while seeing therapists, baby girl. I don’t know what’s going on, but I think this is one of those things that affects all of us if you’re going to disappear into yourself again. ”

“I don’t disappear .”

“You’re right, baby. You don’t disappear.

You eat it and keep it all inside until you make yourself sick.

You dissociate to the point you don’t even blink, Bri.

Tears will stream down your face before you realize you’ve gone catatonic.

You’ll go days without saying a word like a fucking robot on autopilot. ” he argues.

She blinks. “What?”

I nod and squeeze her thigh. “It’s like you're in a trance, and there’s no pulling you out of it.” I tell her.

“I’m scared .” she admits.

“Of what?” Parker asks.

She sniffs, and her eyes water. “I always wanted children. When I bought this home, I imagined them running down the halls, calling to me. “ Mommy !” they’d scream, and I’d yell back, ‘In the kitchen, darlings!’” She replies with a small, breathy chuckle, but then her eyes flutter.

Her tongue pokes out as she wets her bottom lip.

She lowers her voice to barely a whisper.

“When the bad thing happened to me, I spent every day waiting for my period to show up. I was on the pill then, not my IUD. So I was always very aware of when I was to start my period. I would have a few warning cramps a day or two before. I had it marked on my calendar every month, and it always showed up on time, every month. Every twenty-eight days like clockwork. Never late. It may start in the middle of the night or throughout the day, but my period was as dependable as myself.”

She takes a shaky breath but doesn’t look at either of us.

“I still hadn’t gotten all of my memories from that night.

I had just known what had happened… It was but a mere week and five days when I had no warning cramp.

Parker had taken Mama to Kensington, and I took advantage of him being gone.

I took an Uber and went to see a doctor in the outskirts of London.

" She clears her throat. “The building was old and fenced in and needed a fresh coat very badly. There were picketers outside screaming vile, disgusting things. They didn’t even know me. They didn’t know my circumstances.

They just…” The bitter vitriol in her voice is clear, but she still sniffs, a tear rolling down her cheek.

Balling her hand into a fist, she wipes it away with the back of her hand quickly.

Parker takes it and places a soft kiss on it. I squeeze her thigh to urge her to continue.

“I was given a choice. And I took the choice that meant I wouldn’t be attached to someone that had done something so…

repulsive . Because at that point in time, what could I have said to my mother?

‘H ello, Mumsy, remember when you asked me to go to dinner with the Prime fucking Minister and his barrister wife you wanted me to network with to possibly move home to be closer to you, and I faked sick? Well, just wanted to tell you, I snuck out to see a concert instead, and I got drugged and raped, and now I’m carrying their devil spawn!

And guess what? I don’t even know who the father is!

’” She says it like she’s telling a fucking joke, scoffing only to continue. “I only would have disappointed her.”

Parker's eyes narrow as he sits up, pushing his plate away to the center of the table and placing both hands on the one he’s holding.We can’t say anything. We have no right to say anything.

“I hardened my heart, and I made that choice.” She says with tears in her eyes, snot dripping out of her nostrils.

“And then I was grateful when my panties were soiled in crimson.” Another sniff.

“It was when I came back to New York that the memories flooded back to me all at once. Kane’s face.

His breath. His touch. The red.” She shudders.

“I made a choice I never thought I would have to make. Otherwise, David would have hand delivered me to Kane with a pretty bow around my middle.”

“Duchess.” She looks up at me sea glass eyes rimmed red, cheeks rosy. I grab a napkin and wipe her nose, then yank her into my lap. “Now the reason. The real reason you didn’t want to look at me earlier. The reason you're scared.”

“I’m scared because what if it’s our child, Maks?

! A child I want with all of my heart, one I fall in love with as soon as the two pink lines pop up…

and, as some kind of cosmic karma, the universe takes them away, or it turns out I can't have them?” she sobs, reaching around my neck and yanking me to her as she sobs into my shirt.

“I want to have your child. Lots of them. I want this to be a real marriage. Well, as real as it can be with Parker involved, but I feel married to him, too, in my heart. I want to give him babies, too. But he’s snipped, and you’re in a position of power.

This is all so fucked.” She groans into my chest.

I clutch her to me and look at Parker, who has a very inappropriate grin on his face.

“I can get un-snipped.” he drawls, and I roll my eyes.

“I can’t ruin Maksim’s reputation, Parker. He's a Pecan .” she growls, and I hold back my laugh.

“The devil of New York has a blonde wife and is half Russian. His kids could be blonde.” I find myself saying.

She snaps away from me and wipes her nose with her sleeve. “What are you saying?”

“I’m saying we will cross any bridge that we come across as we get there, Duchess. The first child does have to be mine, so they can be my legacy, but the rest…”

“And if it’s a girl? What happens then?”

“The world is changing, Sabrina. Do you know why I had Daze and Kallum at that meeting?”

She sniffs. “Because of the drugs in the crates.”

“Partially. The truth is, Daze is running Inferno a lot better than Kallum is running Pandemonium. I’m going to switch them.

Kallum will be moving back to Boston, while Daze gets Pandemonium back in shape.

Most of my men are scared of her – not because she’s a woman, but because she’s fierce and can cut a man faster than look at them.

She runs a tight ship. The Mafia are loyal to blood .

Maybe there hasn’t been a female Capo dei Capi yet, but it doesn’t mean there won’t be. Who's to say ours won't be the first?”

“She'll be a badass like her auntie Raven.”

I shake my head and rub more circles on her back. “She'll be a badass with a good heart like her mother, sposa mia.”

She sniffs again and dries her eyes. “So just our oldest needs to be yours?”

I nod while I tuck a wayward rose gold strand away from her face. “You are our world, Duchess. Whatever we can give you is yours. ”

“I want to go back to school and study medicine.” She blurts out.

“Then go back to school, Duchess. Just stop hiding from us, okay? I may still be navigating all of this, but I won’t judge you for your past, little moon.

Everyone in this room has one. I’ll be damned if I’m the first to cast the stone.

You are all the good things I never knew I needed.

I told you before, but I’ll tell you again – there is nothing you could do that would deter me from loving you or wanting to be with you. Ever. Do you understand me?”

She plants a salty kiss on my lips and then my neck, shuddering with a heavy sigh so full of relief I can feel the tension in her body leave. “Can we start practicing now?”

Parker stands up quickly. “ Thought you’d never ask.”