Page 7 of Scarred in Silence (The Twisted Trilogy #2)

Astra

The bass thumps in the basement, and bodies are grinding on each other. The strobe lights flash. Everyone is wearing their best costumes. I’ve been invited to a Halloween party. I couldn’t resist attending the party thrown by the seniors at my new college.

Most of my friends are older, but they haven’t graduated from college yet. Despite: I’m here at this party despite not having any genuine friends. I don’t have any friends who are actual risk takers, like I am. I’m not afraid. I’ll do anything to feel heard.

I walk over to the bar in the crowded basement, grabbing some Jungle Juice. It reeks of Vodka. My favorite.

I sip on my drink, letting the lights dance around me. The costumes are actually really cool. There is a ghost face, Michael Myers, a Grim Reaper, and a handful of other favorite characters of mine. I’ve always been a girl for the villains.

I continue to sip my drink, casually dancing, swaying softly to the music.

I need something to take the edge off. I spot Jennifer in the opposite corner, talking to a few girls from colleg e.

Jennifer was in my first finance class this year.

Stupid, I know, but she knows how to party. I make my way over to her .

“Hey!” I practically squeal.

“Hey girl, we were just heading into the bathroom for a minute. Want to come with?”

“Sure.”

I follow Jennifer across the party, and we all pile into the small bathroom.

“Here! I promise you’ll have the best time!”

She hands me a small, round, pink tablet. I don’t hesitate. No one has ever steered me wrong before. I swallow the capsule. It goes down smoothly. Effortlessly.

Everyone else filters out of the bathroom, but I wait. I need it to kick in first.

I stare in the mirror, trying to calm myself down. I need to fit in. They need to like me. They listen to me; they see me.

I stumble back out to the party after about twenty minutes and continue to dance. The song “Pursuit of Happiness” by Kid Cudi Feat. MGMT plays through the large basement.

My body sways to the music. My body is warm, the lights flash in bright streaks of color, and my skin is electric.

I smile at the euphoria that is eating me from the inside out.

A man comes up to me and starts grinding against my ass. I feel invincible, and I feel so… turned on.

I grind back on him. The scent of peppermint fills the air in vibrant streaks. He leans down and whispers against my neck, “Want to have some real fun?”

I giggle to myself, grinding into him harder. He grabs my hips firmly and groans into my ear.

“Come on,” he says in a low voice.

I turn to see him. He wears a Grim Reaper costume. I dressed as a D evil—how fitting. I smile up at him, and he has painted his face like a skeleton beneath his cloak. I take his hand and he takes me up the stairs. The bass thumping beneath the soles of my shoes and into my core.

We walk into an empty living area.

“On your knees,” he whispers against my neck.

My body moves on its own as I sit on my knees in front of the mystery man.

I wet my lips, anticipating what’s coming.

I started sleeping around when I was 14 years old, always with people around my age, but I’ve always had a fascination with older men.

He can’t be over 25 years old. He’s not that much older.

My heavy lashes flutter open as I look up at him. He pulls his hard length out of his pants and strokes it. He drops a trail of spit down onto the head. He uses his thumb to spread it around. I open my mouth, and he plunges it deep into my throat. My moans muffled by his length.

He fists my hair and pushes my head down. I can’t breathe. The pain feels good. Pain means I am alive.

“Fuck,” he groans as he pumps in and out faster. My throat aches from his size, pounding into the back of it. Slobber trails down my chin and onto my lap.

He pulls himself out of my mouth and forces my head back to look up at him.

“Your mouth is fucking perfect. Let’s see what your pussy feels like.” I stand up and spin around, spreading my legs and placing my hands on the couch. He lifts my skirt, and his fingers trail up and down the small fabric covering my most sensitive area.

“You’re so fucking wet for me,” he says in an erotic tone.

My skin buzzes as the drugs continue to pulse through my body.

He slides the thin material over, and he pushes himself inside of me. I let out a loud moan, unable to control myself. It has never felt t his good before.

Whatever I took. It makes me feel everything. My heightened senses keep me from wanting to return to reality. I’ve never felt more alive.

A bright light shines from behind, casting out shadows on the wall in front of me. He leans down and whispers in my ear, “I think my friend is jealous. Can he have a turn?”

I go to say no, but a hand meets my ass with a violent slap. I jerk forward, but the pleasure overwhelms me. I moan against my mind’s will. I shouldn’t let it happen, but I can’t stop it.

I feel him enter me, and the Grim Reaper comes to sit next to my face.

“You’re such a pretty fucking whore,” he praises.

Tears sting my eyes as I let the man take advantage of me. The man exits, and I feel another set of hands touching my body. No. I collapse onto the floor and curl up into a ball.

The light gets closer to my face, and I see someone holding a phone, recording me.

“Such a good little whore. Letting us take turns.”

The Grim Reaper kneels on the floor next to me, running his finger over my cheek.

“Too bad you’re not done yet.”

“No!” I shout.

He chuckles

He flips me onto my stomach, as the other two pin down my arms. I try to kick and scream, but no one can hear me. The music is too loud.

He forces himself into me as he pumps fast. My stomach twists in knots. Bile threatens to rise in my throat.

Suddenly, my emotions tank. I’m not happy. I’m disgusted. I’m a whore. No one can hear me scream .

He finishes deep inside of me, and the camera gets close to my face. Snot and tears cover my face. I want to go home. Fuck this.

He gets off of me, and I hurry out the front door.

The cold air hits me like a freight train. I run. I don’t know how long it will take me, but I don’t care right now. I have to get away.

* * *

My feet ache as they hit the pavement. The road seems to go on forever. I have been running for about 30 minutes. I see my street up ahead, and I push through.

I make it to the front door, and I use the code to enter the empty home. My parents are away at a Halloween party themselves tonight. I run up the stairs into my bedroom and call Evelyn.

“Hey, what’s up?”

It’s hard to hear her over the loud music. She went out with Amara, my older sister. They are at a low-key party. I should have gone with her instead.

“H—hey,” I whispered, my voice tight.

“Oh my god, are you okay? Where are you?”

“I’m home now…”

“We are on our way. Don’t leave.”

I cry silently to myself as I hang up the phone. I can’t live with myself. What have I done?

I run over to my dresser and take out my stash of pills that I have been collecting from my friends. No one has to know.

I open the bag and take all 5 of the pills I have. Tears fall from my eyes.

I lie down on the floor and let the pills do their magic.

At first, I feel weightless, numb. Then I feel heavy, and like I’m drowning. Next, it feels like my body doesn’t belong to me. It feels foreig n.

Lastly, the darkness filters in. Everything goes black. I did it. I don’t have to live with the judgment.