Brace
Every muscle inside my body was tensed, and still my cock would not subside. I wanted to roar in frustration, pound something till it bled. Ruby, my beautiful gravid mate , had sought me out and set my careful grip on control on fire. I ached for her ; my cock was so hard that even the slightest touch would set me off. I thought of how eager she’d been in my arms, even after seeing my scars, seeing the reality of a full - grown Hoxiam.
With a yank, I ripped my loincloth from my hips and fisted my cock with one big paw. Three tugs , and my seedpods rose along my shaft, hard and firm, they blazed a trail of pleasure before jett ing from the tip with force and clatter ing to the ground. Heaving from exertion, as if I’d just run a marathon, I gazed blearily around the small quarters with its four stacked bunks. Two on one wall, two on the other. I stumbled to the nearest one and fell down, my head colliding with the wall. This was a tight space, not big enough to fit a male of my size.
Size. That made me think of my Ruby again and how delicate and tiny she’d felt in my arms. Her curvy rear fit in one palm, and to kiss her, I’d had to raise her halfway up my chest. We were a terrible fit, and she was insane for not fearing me like a normal person. I wanted her. I wanted her so badly that , despite my release, my cock rose again, firm and hard, ready to expel more seed pods , all for her. Such a tiny, precious female, and she was braver than many, and somehow attracted to me.
I had been thinking in circles, working myself into exhaustion since the moment I’d stepped aboard the Finix . The only way I could stick to my plan was to avoid her, so she could leave, free of entanglements. Growling, I gripped my cock again and squeezed it hard. NO! It was too late now. I did not deserve her — I was dangerous — so this was beyond selfish . B ut I had her taste in my system now. She was going to be mine.
Thinking of claiming her was enough to send me over the edge a second time, and I growled so loudly that the bunk rattled on its bolts. She had to have heard me, and all I could think was g ood. Let her know that I was desperate for the pleasure she had to offer me, and that I was going to come for her and her alone.
Afterward, I briefly fell into a fitful daze. Then I rose and cleaned up, gazing around the bunkroom again and noting with surprise that I had not clawed any of its surfaces, nor had I broken the furniture. I’d been here two weeks, that was a record. After what had happened in the galley, it was also a complete surprise. I’d kept control — sort of — enough to channel all those intense feelings in a safe manner.
When I left the room to finish what I’d been cooking in the galley, I did not kid myself into thinking that meant I was cured. It didn’t work that way . I had not been truly tested yet, and until I was, I could not guarantee my mate’s safety.
The galley still smelled of her release, a delicious scent I deeply inhaled. It overpowered the other aroma s of the food I’d been preparing, or maybe I was simply that sensitive to it. I wanted to finish this savory pie, make sure the Haras wheat crust got the perfect crunch. Then I was going to march over to her door and deliver that food without hiding around the corner. It was time I spelled out the risks to my bold female — let her have all the facts so she could make up her mind. And once she did, I’d make sure she knew I’d never let her go.
I should have known that she found me first. Her hair was a curly brown halo around her head, her expression sleepy. She even yawned as she stepped into the tiny galley, but then followed i t with a bright-eyed smile. “You’re not running away this time? No cloak?” I rolled a shoulder, my mouth opening in a ferocious grin. No, she’d seen me, and she was still here. There was no point. The fact was, I had not felt as untethered and enraged as I had aboard the Varakartoom . Taking care of her needs felt good, it settled me, gave me something good to focus on.
“No,” I said gruffly. T hen I floundered for words. I was going to tell her about my past — about why she shouldn’t pursue me as a mate — but I could n’ t get the words past my lips. She tried to move past me , as if she wanted to reach the cooler for a drink, but the space was too small , and we bumped together. Instantly, my cock recalled what we’d been up to a few hours ago —h ow it had felt to sink my tongue deep into her mouth and feel her cunt ride against my chest until she found her release.
Picking her up, I sat her on the counter with a warning look . “Stay!” T hen I twisted to open the cooler for her and pull ed out her favorite morning drink. “I’ll make tea as well,” I said, moving through the by - now immensely familiar tiny galley. It was poorly outfitted, but I’d made do. She hadn’t complained once about the food, and I’d made sure to feed her only the very best. I’d pillaged the Varakartoom ’s fresh supplies to stock the Finix , and I hadn’t told the captain about it. Wasn’t like they’d need the supplies without a chef —t hey were running on rations from the food replicator in my absence.
My Ruby was smiling so widely her jaw had to ache when I handed her the drink. Her pretty browns were twinkling, and her heels were kicking against the cupboard beneath the counter, the soft tap-tap calling forth a merriment inside my own chest. Okay, this was good, so far. I could do this, even if it was a little strange to have someone else in my domain after so long. When I got back to work finishing the breakfast pie, it felt nice not to be alone. She was talking to me, babbling brightly about how she’d bought the Finix in the Alpha quadrant before flying it here. I loved listening to the cadence of her voice, her accent different from that of the humans aboard the Varakartoom .
Eventually, I had her sit down at the tiny fold - out table so she could eat, and that’s when I noticed the fluffy blue slippers on her feet. They were textured and colored almost exactly like Hoxiam fur, like mine. The sight was such a surprise that I had to look twice. “Oh no,” she exclaimed. “That’s not real fur. It’s not some relative of yours, I swear! I would never…”
“Relative? ” I barked out a surprised laugh, and the deep sound rocked through my chest with an ache, pulling on muscles not used to moving that way. I could not remember the last time I’d laughed, but the worried expression — combined with the absurd notion that someone would make slippers out of Hoxiam fur — set me off. She was so sweet to worry about that, and so silly at the same time. I would worry that I’d offended her by laughing, but she was smiling , too, then chuckling and holding the round curve of her pregnant belly as if she feared she’d shake the baby out of it if she wasn’t careful.
“No,” I said, my voice raw after that much sound. I was not used to this much talking, and it was showing. Normally, I growled more than I spoke, and I hadn’t even been doing much of that over the past two weeks. Now , I’d roared my release, actually had a conversation, and I’d laughed. “I know that. I was just noticing how good blue fur looks on you.”
“Why, Brace, are you flirting with me?” she said, her smile as radiant as that day I’d first seen her. It punched me in the chest, punched me in the gut, replacing the always - gnawing sense of hunger there with something much warmer, much brighter —something I had no name for.
I fought to hold back a grin, not wanting to spook her with how wide it was, but that was impossible. I could n’ t hold it in, and I clearly could n’ t spook her with it either. “Yeah, I am,” I said firmly. “Now eat, before it gets cold.” I pushed her plate across the table with a finger, and she ducked her head, pink stealing across her cheeks as she dug in. I did n’ t want her to see me eat, but when she flapped her hand at the remaining three - quarters of pie, I could n’ t resist. That was the curse of a Hoxiam, we were always hungry, for food or for sex. Better I fill myself with food, for now.
An alarm began blaring just as Ruby was scraping her last bite of food off her plate. Her eyes grew wide, and then she swore, catching me by surprise. “That means we’ve reached Rumcas,” she bemoaned, as if reaching her destination o n time was the last thing she wanted. If I recalled correctly, she’d been jumping to leave the Varakartoom not that long ago, so what had changed? I knew Ysa had fixed the engine , so she was back on schedule, was that it? I tried really hard not to believe that it was because she wanted to spend more time with me.
She rose to her feet and brought her empty dish to the sink, her gait a little ungainly. Over the past two weeks, she’d definitely gotten much bigger, her baby was growing fast. I did n’ t know if that was normal or not, and I realized I should have found out. What if she was about to give birth? Dravion wasn’t here ; I’d have to be the one to help her. A cold panic set in at the thought. That was life or death! I was usually the one dealing death; I’d never even considered being responsible for new life.
Hurrying to her side, I was forced to squeeze past her delicious rump to reach the sink and snatch the plate from her hand. “No,” she protested immediately, but her body went soft against me, her scent spiking with heat. Damn it, my cock instantly began to stiffen, pressing against her back , where she could definitely feel it. Her next words were husky with desire. “You should finish your meal. I have to get us docked.”
I didn’t know I could consider the word ‘docked’ dirty, but I was definitely thinking of docking her. Shaking my head, I smoothed down the fur on the back of my head with one hand, reining in my wayward thoughts. “Eat?” I told her, and to distract myself, I reached out to the table and grabbed the last, large slice of crispy, savory breakfast pie. I opened my maw wide and tossed it in, swallowing the piece whole. “Done. Now let me do the dishes, you dock the ship.” It was a miracle I didn’t choke on the word ‘dock.’ Blazing stars, she smelled like she was in heat, but I felt like I was, too. A fter that one taste, I was addicted.
She was sitting in the pilot seat and talking to the Rumcas Control T ower for its main port when I stepped onto the bridge a short while later. Unlike earlier, when I’d shared breakfast with her, she looked tired, no longer glowing with happiness. Stepping carefully into her field of view felt a little odd , after how much effort I’d put in to hiding from her sight, hers and many others. When she saw me, her eyes lit up, and her smile made the gesture worthwhile.
I was certain that even the dull - sounding Rummicaron from the control tower could hear the shift in her tone. She sounded much happier when she continued bargaining for a landing slot. She looked a little nervous at the controls not much later , when she had to take the huge Long Hauler in for a landing. I would have gladly done the job for her, but my only experience was with landing shuttles ; she was , without a doubt , the better candidate. I didn’t know what to do to help, and I hated how restless that made me feel, anger bubbling through my veins. Thoughts of self - recrimination following soon after. I should have paid more attention to the flight lessons Asmoded had given me. I s hould have learned how to land the Varakartoom so I could land the Finix now. I was an idiot, untrained and uneducated, and only one male was to blame for that: Jalima. He’d held me captive and turned me into a killing machine, robbing me of my childhood, robbing me of my chance at a future.
“There,” Ruby said suddenly, jarring me from my thoughts. She sounded bright again, and , like sunshine after rain, that voice seemed to chase away the darkness in my head. We had landed, and I’d spent the entire time berating myself in my head while she did all the work. She rose stiffly from the pilot seat, cracking her back and rubbing at the lower muscles as if they pained her. “Now I’ve got to step outside and sell that gray fabric. Will you be all right on your own in here?”
That innocent question sparked all kinds of things inside my brain. Okay, I sucked at flying ships, but now she wanted me to sit on my ass instead of doing the one thing I was good at? “You can’t go out,” I snarled, wincing when I realized how badly I had snapped at her but unable to hold the violent feelings back. “I am here for your protection, remember? Where you go, I go!” A Hoxiam bared his teeth in aggression, but I’d grown up away from my homeworld. I’d learned that many species also bared their teeth to express happiness. Ruby’s smile did not make me feel threatened, but her teeth were little and blunt. Now I’d bared my teeth at her, opening my maw wide in a threatening display. She knew the difference, just like I did.
Stubborn female just crossed her arms over her chest , and blazing stars, she smiled. “I know why you’re here. I just thought you’d be more comfortable aboard the Finix . I need to speak with the supply master at the Rummicaron military base. I’m sure I’d be safe there.” Safe? On Rumcas? She was crazy. They ha d not ban ned slavery inside Rummicaron space, and any male would be crazy not to try to snatch up a pregnant human as pretty as my Ruby.
How had she survived on her own all this time? I could not wrap my head around this, and it wasn’t going to happen on my watch. “No,” I said, and damn it, I snapped my teeth at her again, maw opening wide. This was exactly what I feared would happen if I left my galley ; I was acting like a raving beast. All control gone, nothing but instinct, posturing, snarling, biting. “I am coming with you.”
Ruby nodded slowly, her expression turning thoughtful. Then her hands went back to the small of her back, rubbing again. I pushed her fingers away with one hand before I could think better of it, pressing gently against the tense muscles, then slowly rubbing until she sighed with relief. “Okay, you are coming,” she said. I felt wild , like the icy oceans — unbalanced — when those words tipped my brain back into the gutter. Heated thoughts sp un through my mind. Coming? Yes , please. I’d come for her so hard , several times last night…
Ruby was confusing me and putting all my vows to the test. I had sworn I’d keep her safe, nothing more. I’d sworn to myself to keep my distance. Instead, I swept her into my arms, lifting her off her feet so I could cradle her—and the large mound of her belly—against my chest. “First, I need to put on a disguise,” I told her. She was not helping me keep my head straight when she went all soft and pliant against me. This female either had no protective instincts, or her instincts about me were really good. I’d rather die than harm a precious hair on her pretty head.
Her expression wilted a little at the word “ disguise. ” “You don’t need to hide from me, Brace. I saw your scars, but they don’t bother me. You should wear them with pride. You’re a survivor, that’s nothing to be ashamed of.” Her words took me by surprise , and for a moment , I froze right there in the doorway leading off the bridge. She was kind for saying that, but it was not the scars that made me hide; not really. In this case, the disguise was something else entirely.
“I’m talking about a slave collar,” I said gruffly. It was a sore point for any Hoxiam. We were not free to visit any planet, with a rare few exceptions—not unless we were enslaved and could be controlled with pain at the flick of a button. All because a certain amount of my species failed to control their everlasting hunger and turned to devouring any flesh they could hunt. That included sentient beings. I had never done such a heinous thing myself, but most of the other Hoxiam I had met had taken that step. Especially those kept in captivity, starved to fit a certain weight class for the arena sands. I remembered well the absolute agony of being starved, of feeling my flesh diminish and waste away. A Hoxiam could take a lot of that, at least, their body could, but the mind… that was a very different story.
Many of them snapped, and because of that, we had a bad name and a Quadrant - wide ban, which only made the problem worse. I could see in Ruby’s eyes that she’d understood the meaning of the slave collar right away. Her pretty brown eyes grew wide , and she began to shake her head in denial. “Oh no, I can’t do that to you! Don’t ask me to do that.” She sounded so upset that I wanted to tell her she didn’t have to, but there was no other way. I could not set foot on Rumcas without a collar around my neck and the control firmly in her hand.
“You can,” I said to her, my chest rumbling in discontent at her distress. I didn’t like it either, but she was my mate ; there was no one I’d trust with a remote like that. I’d brought a real collar, not a fake one either, because I did not want to risk tampering charges. The Rummicaron were very strict about the rules and highly advanced. Of course mine did have a safety feature installed, courtesy of Mitnick, but one that only activated under certain circumstances. The remote Ruby would have was very real.
I made a stop at my bunkroom, reluctantly putting her back on her feet by the door. “Stay,” I told her, which made her sad smile twist into something more cheerful again. She must have enjoyed the irony of m y ordering her around, when I was about to pretend to be her slave. She was straightening her ruffled jumpsuit when I ducked into the room to dig the collar from my small pack of personal belongings. When I came back out, ducking low to fit through the doorway, she ha d shifted to smoothing her hands over the fabric stretched tightly over her belly.
“I swear,” she muttered when she saw me, “ t hat baby has put on ten pounds since last week… I feel like I’m about to pop. I can’t believe there are still at least three more months of this!” My eyes went wide as I assessed her tiny body and the large bulge her pregnant belly made. How much bigger would the baby be by then? Any concerns about the collar fled my mind as I contemplated that she’d have to give birth to that baby at some point.
Dropping to my knees, I could n’ t control the impulse to curl myself protectively around her and press my ear to her belly. I could hear the little one in there, the rapid pulsing of his tiny heart combined in beautiful harmony with the slower pulse of his mother. “Stop growing,” I growled . “You’re going to hurt your mom.”
Ruby’s hands found their way to my shoulders, gently rubbing through the fur there. “It’s okay, that’s normal,” she told me, but she did not sound like she was certain about it. “I’m going to be fine . W e all are.” That made it sound like she was including me, but I knew better. Once she was safe — far removed from Jalima’s influence — I had to leave. I’d failed at keeping my distance, but I would not fail at protecting her, even from me. The longer I stayed with her, the great er the chance that my control would slip and I ’d g i ve into the rage always simmering in my gut. The rage that had its hooks firmly in my Hoxiam hunger, the rage that could turn me into the flesheater everyone already thought I was.
“Let’s go,” I told my female. Rising to my feet, I snapped the collar around my neck and stuck the remote in her hand. She almost dropped it, revulsion clear on her face, but she squared her shoulders and held on.