Page 35

CHAPTER 34

AMELIA

The room I’m in is opulent.

I don’t think I’ve ever been in an opulent room before. Granted, my family is well off, but we’re nothing like the royals.

Even though this is the house we stayed at for the last six months, I never came into this room on the fourth floor.

Tristan and his crew are staying at the palace. The trip will be made with me in a car, my father and Shannon by my side. I’m already shaking, thinking about it.

The bed is huge, big enough for at least six people, if I’m being honest. With just me in it, it’ll feel even smaller.

My phone makes a noise from where I laid it on the desk. It hasn’t made a noise in so long it takes me a moment to realize what it is. Tristan and I have been together since the day after we were introduced, and I haven’t needed it.

Running over to it, I grab it up like it’s a lifeline. When I see Tristan has sent me a text, a stupidly excited smile spreads across my face. It feels huge, but I can’t even make myself care.

T: Be sure and get plenty of sleep tonight. Tomorrow will be a very long day.

A: I’m not sure how I’m going to get any sleep, Tris. First we’re going to be on actual TV tomorrow.

I’m not sure what’s freaking me out more. The fact I’m not sleeping in the same bed as him, or that millions will see me. Millions tuned in to see Phillip marry his queen. More will probably tune in to see us. I’m worried people will pick out something stupid I do, then I’ll be a meme for the rest of my life. It’s a legitimate fear, and I don’t know how to stop thinking about it.

It doesn’t help that earlier in the day, Shannon pointed out the TV crews.

They’re even camped out in front of this house. I knew there would be people watching me leave and head to the wedding venue, but now it’s so much more real.

T: The only one who is going to matter will be me. You’ll be beautiful and I’ll be the luckiest man in the world.

A: Tris, I’m scared.

There I said it, told him about the fear tingling at the back of my neck.

Cold feet is one thing, but I’m legitimately scared something may happen tomorrow we can never come back from. I keep telling myself no one would try to take a shot at us, but it’s on a global stage, and there are plenty of people who would love to take the spotlight from us.

T: Scared about what ?

Now that he’s asking, I don’t want to throw my fears off on him. What if I’m the one who’s worrying for no reason. It’s easy to downplay it and pretend like I’m not scared to death.

A: I’m not sure, I just feel like we have a bullseye on our backs. Like someone is going to ruin our perfect day.

T: It’s normal. I’m sure all brides and grooms feel this way. I mean we’re on a global stage, Lia, but you have to know we’re going to be fine.

I don’t, and that’s why I’m worried. Instead of keeping him longer, I decide to end the conversation. Having a seat on the bed, I type quickly.

A: I know we will be. I have to get my beauty sleep for tomorrow. I’ll see you in a few hours. Love you, Tris.

T: Love you too!

I throw the phone to my side on a sigh.

“That doesn’t sound good.” Shannon makes her way into the room. “Not having second thoughts, are you?”

“No! I want to marry Tristan more than I’ve ever wanted anything in my life. I’m just nervous.” I do my best to explain to her. “There will be a lot of people watching tomorrow, a lot of expectations.”

“No one else matters but his,” she reminds me.

“Now you sound like him.” I giggle. “In theory, I know that’s right, but I’m still worried.”

“Hey, he sounds super smart.” She comes over, sitting next to me. She turns to face me, her knowing gaze almost feeling like it can see right through me. “Tell me, Amelia. What’s really wrong?”

Do I be honest with her?

Do I admit I’m not sure I’m the person everyone thinks I am?

“I feel like a fraud!” I shout, throwing my face in my hands.

“A fraud?”

It’s hard to explain, but I struggle through it, praying I can get her to understand. “You make me beautiful, you pick my clothes, do my makeup and my hair, you tell me if the jewelry I pick out matches.” I shrug, letting this insecurity out. I hadn’t planned on doing it now, but if not now, when.

She pulls my hands back. “I work with what I have, Amelia. If you weren’t already beautiful, I couldn’t make you look the way I do. Tristan loves you for who you are, and the world will love you for the same reasons he does. Don’t be nervous.”

It’s so easy for her to say, but my stomach is rolling, thinking of everyone who will see me on the screen tomorrow. There are people camped out in the royal park here, wanting to catch a glimpse of me or us as we travel through the streets. For some reason the reality of the situation is hitting me tonight, and I’m almost having a freak out.

“You’re living almost every little girl’s and some little boy’s dreams tomorrow.” Shannon laughs. “Enjoy your day. Do your best to forget about all the people watching and just focus on your husband. I mean, can you imagine how hot Tristan’s going to look in what he decides to wear?”

“I hope it’s a tux,” I blurt out. “He rocks a tux in so many ways.”

“But what about his military uniform? ”

“That’s what it’s between. A tux or a military uniform. I’ve only seen pictures of him in the uniform, but I’ve seen him alive and well in a tux. Either way I won’t be able to wait for the wedding to get over, to get him out of either one.”

Shannon laughs loudly at what I’ve just said. “He is very handsome.”

“He’s hot!” I correct her. “Dark and brooding with the right amount of mystery and danger. He’s every dream I ever had of the man I was going to marry.”

I don’t realize the truth of the words until I say them. Why am I freaking out when this is truly every single thing I want?

“Then focus on that.” Shannon claps her hands. “Focus on the fact your dream is coming true. Not that you’re scared of the future. Live in the present. Mark every moment tomorrow as a memory that won’t be erased, and above all, have fun. Smile if you want, laugh if you want, cry if you want. You’re perfect, Amelia, just the way you are.”

You’re perfect just the way you are.

Those words are echoing in my brain later on when I lay down to sleep. They’re running on a loop that won’t seem to stop. I wonder if other brides have this much trouble sleeping the night before they get married.

I’m trying desperately to focus on what Shannon told me instead of worrying about falling while walking up the stairs or maybe having a wardrobe malfunction. It would be the one thing I’d never be able to get away from.

The phone on my nightstand vibrates again, and I reach over, grabbing it like it’s a lifeline.

T: I don’t know that I can sleep without you here.

Who knew he’d be this man when the two of us met?

A: I know, this bed is huge, and I miss the warmth of you next to me. I’m freezing.

T: That’s the one thing I’m not missing. Your frozen feet rubbing against my calf, but other than that, I miss you a lot.

A: LOL! My favorite thing to do is rub my frozen feet against your calf.

T: I know, which is why I need to start wearing pajama pants to bed.

A: Tris, it’ll break my heart.

T: Oh you’re pouring it on thick now, Lia. It won’t break your heart, I promise.

A: It might.

T: I’ll never break your heart.

There he is, the man I’ve learned Tristan can be. He’s sweet in his own way, keeping me on my toes with the words he says. It may be stupid but I trust him and believe him fully.

A: I know, I can trust you with anything.

T: I can’t wait to have you with me forever, Lia.

A: Me neither. I’ll be the one in white walking toward you at the end of the aisle. Don’t forget me?

T: I’ll never forget you.

I smile, putting the phone back on the bedside table before I curl up, pulling one of the many pillows into my side. It’s a poor substitute for Tristan, but for now it’ll do. In less than twelve hours, nothing will ever be able to pull us apart.

Closing my eyes, I think of how handsome he’ll look, how happy I’ll be, and what the rest of our lives will look like.

For now, I’ll believe it’ll all be flowers and hearts, because I refuse to think of the opposite.