Page 56

Chapter Thirty-Six

T he ache of waking without him tugged at her muscles, every space between bone and cartilage yearning to stretch, but there was nowhere to spread out.

Astra hadn’t heard a word said at breakfast until her mother dropped her fork and turned her eyes on Astra from across the table.

“You’re uncharacteristically quiet, Astra.” She looked around the table. Father, Lunelle, Mirquios, and Tula watched.

“I did not sleep well.” Reaching for her coffee cup, Astra sipped and prayed to whatever god had not yet abandoned her that it would be enough to move on.

“Something on your mind?” Nayson asked.

“Never.” She grinned, but she knew her eyes did not reflect the curve of her lips.

“I’m sure you’ll perk up in time for your wedding gown fitting this afternoon,” Oestera sighed. Astra felt the lurch within both Mirquios and Lunelle’s chests.

“Some coffee and a little fresh air, I’ll be the portrait of a glowing bride,” she insisted, squeezing Mirquios’s hand over the table, the movement purely for show.

Easy now, Princess , she shot at Lunelle as her cheeks reddened.

You have no idea how difficult it is, Astra.

Astra set her eyes on Lunelle as she pulled her hand away, I’m sorry, Lu, but until we have a better plan…

She sighed, leaning her chin in her hand. Oestera huffed, “Oh, not you, too.”

“Sorry,” Lunelle said, straightening her back and moving her silver hair from one shoulder to the other, deflecting from the blush creeping over her neck.

Breakfast passed slowly, agonizingly so, but as the table cleared and everyone went on their merry way, Astra lingered behind.

It occurred to her sometime between staring at the ceiling and staring at the wall that Lux was right about talking to her mother.

She had never outright asked Oestera what happened during The Flare.

She’d thought about it all morning—if she implied Selenia was involved, perhaps she’d jump to her defense. Slip somehow.

It was mostly out of politeness that Astra never asked her or anyone else who was alive for it. Lunelle was only a small child when it happened and even her mouth ran dry when the topic came up.

“May I speak with you, Mother?”

“Of course,” she agreed, setting down her tea. She nodded to her maidens, permitting them to take their leave. Nayson eyed his daughter carefully as she tilted her head toward the door. He was happy to exit the conversation.

“What is it?” She looked so tired of Astra already.

“I had a dream last night. It was unsettling, and I would keep it to myself, but I fear it might mean something. I was hoping you could help me separate fact from fiction.”

Oestera’s grip on her emotions slipped for just a moment, a bright orange flame of fear shooting from her navel to her throat, but before it could force anything from her lips, it smoldered.

Astra took her silence as permission to keep going.

“I dreamed I was in Solaris, during The Flare,” she lied. “And Leona was there, as well as the king. And you, of course.”

“Oh?” she asked, her face somehow even more pale than usual.

“But there was someone else there that I found peculiar. Selenia.”

Oestera’s eyes narrowed, her curiosity outweighing her reservations. “I see. And what was her role?”

“I’m not sure. She wasn’t really there, of course?”

She did not answer right away. “Not that I know of.”

“An odd dream then. I know so little of your mother.”

Her mother sighed. “I do not wish to speculate on something so painful.”

She nodded, “Understood, but?—”

“Please,” Oestera said, her eyes finding Astra’s in a rare moment of sincerity.

“Whatever you think you know, leave me out of it. You must,” she said, the words landing like harsh winds against her skin.

Her face took on a shade of pink that Astra recognized many times over. “I cannot give you more.”

She stood, brushing her dress back with a violent whip, her chest caving in as she turned to leave.

“You’re afraid.” Astra narrowed her eyes, the orange ripple rising off her shoulders. What a strange reaction . “What does she have on you?”

Oestera closed her eyes and gripped the bridge of her nose. She glanced at Astra one more time and something within her turned over. Her eyes widened and refocused.

“Where did you find that dress?”

“What?” She looked down, a gentle green silk draped over her frame. “Ameera left it out for me.”

“Of course,” she said, sweeping from the table and disappearing into the palace, leaving Astra with more questions than answers.

* * *

She tried to shake off her mother’s strange reaction all day, but even after the wedding dress fitting and dinner, Oestera’s frozen glare was still fresh in her mind as she finished a few letters to Celene in her study.

If Oestera didn’t want to tell her the truth, she was going to have to figure it out herself.

She’d waited until it was late enough in the night that no one would catch her and sat on the study floor, trying to let the entire cursed day melt away.

Her mind stilled and she let it slip, following it down the trail as she fell inside herself.

The feeling was less alarming now. She knew what to expect, concentrating on finding her mother in the moments before The Flare.

Astra’s feet hit the ground, but instead of the obsidian tiles of the Lunar Palace, she found herself smack in the middle of a sunstone courtyard, everything bright and airy, the smooth walls rippled with reds and oranges.

But it was the scent that drowned her—sweet orange blossom and warm, toasted honey floated over the afternoon breeze. Everyone around her wafted across hallways in breezy linen and cotton robes, their skin the same deep bronze as Lux’s.

She moved quickly, unsure how much time she would have or if others could see her the way Ehlaria or the commander had. She’d surely stick out with her pale face and velvet Winter dress.

She waited for her mother’s signature chill to call to her, Oestera’s energy frenetic as it moved through a room nearby.

Astra shuffled quickly along the hallways.

The walls dripped with gilded artwork and sparkling tapestries.

Slipping by sentries and servants, she stopped only when she felt Oestera through a wall.

Astra did not give herself time to second guess before simply passing through the wall, finding herself in a cozy study, a glass pane in the ceiling spilling golden light into the room.

“It cannot be done,” said a baritone voice, fraught with regret and fear.

The Solar King Solan rose from his desk, his face set in a familiar reluctant expression.

A suffered blend of challenge and sorrow.

Solan stepped forward, the light above illuminating his deep-set amber eyes as they fell to a face she knew so intimately.

A face that could be hers in just a few years.

Leona kneeled on the floor, her crimson curls spilling over her shoulders as she tucked her chin to her chest.

Not a posture Astra would have expected to find a Lunar Queen in.

“Then do not attempt it,” another voice said from the corner. One that echoed off the canyons of her mind frequently—criticizing, cutting. Oestera sprang forward, her face not yet touched by the burdens of raising her children, her belly swollen beneath her ornate gown.

Leona warned, “I did not bring you here to stop me. I brought you here to witness.”

“You’re both fools,” Oestera hissed, shaking her head.

Solan nodded, the grim lines in his forehead worn and tired. “Unfortunately, I’ve always been a fool when it comes to your sister.”

“Her mind is made up,” Oestera cried. “You have to stop her!”

Solan stared at Oestera, their eyes speaking in a language that couldn’t be translated.

“I’ll do it myself,” Leona ground out, a crimson fire lighting inside her chest. “It’s the only way we break this curse, Solan.

If we don’t, the gods will maintain their grip on our courts for yet another generation.

For a thousand years, they’ve pitted us against one another and bound us to make it impossible to rise against them…

if we don’t do it, who will? Your heir? His?

How many more centuries will we tolerate their cruelty? ”

“Leona,” Solan breathed, his heart sinking into his chest, drowning in blood-red anxiety. He kneeled before her, and that’s when Astra saw it.

The knife in her hand.

“It is impossible to sever a Tether. If it weren’t, one of our predecessors surely would have done it by now.”

Leona set her face, drawing in a deep breath and resting her hand on his chest. “Selenia said it could be done.”

“Is that true?” Solan looked to Oestera, who looked rather like she was about to vomit.

“She assured us it was.”

“But you don’t believe her,” he said, his eyes searching both sisters’ expressions.

Oestera shrugged. “If it were possible, why would we still be here, millennia later?”

“Because no one has ever been brave enough to do it,” Leona muttered. “They’d rather destroy each other’s courts or murder each other to avoid fulfilling some prophecy we both know isn’t true.”

Leona leaned forward, brushing her hand against Solan’s cheek, opal and bronze fusing together in a shimmering heat. “They’ve told us for centuries one touch was instant death, and you know it’s not true. We’re proof it isn’t true!”

“Leona—”

“I know you are not like us. You do not rely on intuition and gut feelings the way we do, but ask yourself, really search yourself—what’s the truth, Solan?

It lives within you just as surely as it lives within me.

Selenia is sure that we can sever the Tether and break the bond because we’ve been the only two strong enough to accept it. ”

Solan leaned into Leona’s palm, the swirling in his chest shifting from anxiety to devastation.

“What if I’m not strong enough to let it go?”