Page 49

Bianca POV

I’d been released from the fear and pain, but something was still holding me back from wanting to return to reality. This dark, quiet place was soft and comforting, where I felt nothing—no shame, no discomfort, just a numbing detachment.

My emotions were securely locked away, unreachable by pain or sadness.

I could stay here forever.

“ Bianca .”

The voice sounded louder than I remembered, and I slowly opened my eyes as a spark of recognition broke through the static. Curiosity swelled in my chest, but at the same time, I was almost afraid to learn more.

“What are you still doing here?” A warmth surrounded me, and the voice echoed through the space.

My heart raced at the accusation in his tone, and I felt it seep back into me. Anger swelled in my chest, and I felt annoyance flare up toward the entity that threatened my peace.

I knew exactly who this was.

“Leave me alone,” I said.

“I can’t do that. We’re stagnating,” Mu replied, causing another shiver to rush through me. “This is not what we were born to become.”

“Mind your own business,” I replied, arguing with myself. Or was I?

We weren’t the same. I was myself—Damen had said so. It didn’t matter that I was Mu’s reincarnation; I was still me . And I wasn’t strong enough to—

“Yes, you’re uniquely Bianca, with your own experiences and choices,” Mu said. Somehow, I could almost visualize him. He probably looked like a Lord of the Rings elf—all regal and beautiful. Possibly all-knowing and wise.

What a pretentious jerk.

“However, as a Wood Xing, you also carry the collective wisdom and potential of your ancestors,” he continued, ignoring my thoughts. “You’re both an individual and part of a greater lineage.”

“That’s stupid…” I muttered. “And extremely confusing.”

“Focus,” he demanded, and the scene shifted.

I blinked, studying the new space that surrounded me.

This was most likely Mu’s doing, too. It was stereotypical that such an individual would have a propensity for fairyland forests—the mossier, the better.

Then my vision cleared, and he stood in front of me.

Was he wearing an actual crown? And what were those billowing clothes? They were green, with what appeared to be golden, leaf-patterned trim along the hems. But even more important was the length of his hair .

How could one even brush such insanity?

“You’ve come to claim your birthright,” he declared, lifting his hand.

Ah, so he was a drama queen. I was not surprised.

I glanced down at myself—I’d been cloaked in the same ridiculous outfit, except it was swimming on me. But that was far from a concern. It wasn’t like I wanted to wear this stupid thing anyway.

“I’m okay without it.” I frowned. I would be more than happy to be hidden in obscurity forever and stuck in a fake marriage with my brother.

“The path before you is not optional,” Mu said, returning his hand to his side. “One of the hardest things is to be idle and watch everyone falter. The others need us if they are to succeed.”

Darn it. My shoulders dropped as the argument fell from me.

“They are pretty clueless,” I grumbled, remembering Damen’s many terrible plans. Then, my mind drifted to Bryce, who required so much guidance. And Miles…

Poor Miles. He desperately needed someone to nudge him to be his best self.

Yet, doubt filled me, causing my chest to ache.

“I can’t help anyone.” I looked at Mu. There were so many reasons why. “I’m damaged. I’m not brave enough.”

Also, if Mu was me and I was him. If he’d been here the whole time…

Then I couldn’t trust him.

“Why didn’t you help?” I asked.

I had so much packed into that question I was afraid he’d not understand. But I didn’t need to explain further. He frowned and lowered his head, signifying that he knew exactly what I was talking about.

“Why didn’t you just take over, or whatever you did when I fought Daniel Cole?” I accused. “You could have saved me, and now I’m all messed up.”

“You are you ,” he repeated in that sage-like way that made me want to punch him in the face. “In each life, our purpose is to guide except only in dire circumstances. We are one. Our essence is yours, but the choices are your own.”

“But—” That still didn’t make sense.

“You know what happened when we fought the witch.” Mu tilted his head, studying me. “Have you considered sharing this with the others?”

“Share what?” I snapped.

He didn’t seem to take offense. “Your combat skills. Your bodyguard taught you the fundamentals. I may have awakened the memory and strength, but you executed the techniques yourself. Yet you allowed them to believe the actions were mine. You were not in danger of dying.”

My face flooded with heat, and I pressed my hands against my cheeks. It was true—no one had figured it out, not even after seeing the video.

I felt so guilty.

“I-I’m not very good at it,” I stammered, glancing at the ground. “It’s been a long time. I hadn’t had a real lesson since before—”

“It’s enough,” Mu responded. “There’s the potential for something more. Just like Spring.”

I glanced at him. “Pardon?”

“ Mu ,” he replied, holding out his hand.

In it was a dead daffodil. But as I watched, it regained its yellow color and returned to life.

“Wood. Us . We’re the representative of Spring.

Rebirth, flexibility, strength, and life.

It’s not in your nature to be dormant and allow your past to dictate your future. ”

“I’m not dormant.” How offensive. “And I’ve moved on with my life. I’m fine . It’s everyone else who seems to have a problem. Not me.”

“You’re okay?” Mu opened his hand, dropping the flower. It disappeared before it hit the ground. “Is that why Shui is rummaging around in your head?”

“He’s what ?” I covered my mouth, but it wasn’t enough to prevent my squeaky outburst. “What if he sees something secret? You’re in my head too, right?” I glared at him. How could he allow this? “Go smite him. Get him out.”

“He hasn’t seen anything besides what you’d share if you could, but currently cannot communicate.” Mu tilted his head, studying me. “Don’t worry, I’ve locked away our deepest thoughts. Besides, he won’t search anymore. He’s gotten what he needed.”

What did Julian need ? I was going to throttle him.

“Which was what?” I growled. “Why am I here?”

“That’s the question. Why are you here if you’ve moved on?” Mu asked. “Avoiding the problem isn’t healing, and it causes the issue to fester in your mind and poison your soul. Before you can truly move on, you must confront your past.”

The bravado seeped from me, and I stepped back. What was he saying? “I can’t…”

“Take it one day at a time.” He waved his hand, and the ground faded from beneath my feet. However, instead of falling, this time, I floated in place. “Confrontation of the current issue is a good place to begin.”

The scene shifted. I found myself in a circular stone room; its only exit was a small window to my right. A glance outside revealed no safe way down, only the threat of a deadly fall from the tower.

Jumping was pointless; I doubted I’d float this time.

“My subconscious is trying to kill me…” I fell to my knees in front of the low window, and from this position, I could see the happy-looking sky above my prison.

Stupid Mu. Why would he trap me here? I hated him. Perhaps there was a way to purge him from my soul.

A shiver shot up my spine as the air shifted, like an intrusion pressing against the stillness. I hesitated and looked toward the window.

What had changed?

I pushed myself up, leaning out to see the tower’s base.

“Julian?” I blinked down at him. What was this? Were we still in my head? Was he?

That sounded weird.

“Why are you up there?” he asked—I could barely see him from here, but something about this space made it easier to hear.

“I’m stargazing,” I said, narrowing my eyes. I hadn’t forgotten that he’d jumped into my memories. Lord only knew what he’d seen. It was too humiliating to face him, and anger still burned in me. “Seemed like a good idea at the time.”

Julian looked at the cloudless sky before finally returning his gaze to me. “Darling…” He sounded unsure. “That’s not the real sky. Secondly… Well, it’s daytime.”

“I know that!” My face heated, and I ducked under the edge of the window. I began to count my breaths as I pressed my cheek against the cold stone.

I couldn’t face him.

“Bianca, can you look at me please?” I could still hear him. “I want to talk to you.”

“I don’t want to talk to you.” My racing heart was echoing with force in my throat. I didn’t have to face anything. “I’m just going to stay up here forever.”

“You will—if you don’t snap out of it.” Julian’s tone changed slightly. There was something darker, more commanding in his voice that had never been present before. “You can’t run away for the rest of your life.”

“Watch me. You’re not even supposed to be here anyway,” I muttered, closing my eyes.

A scratching sound pulled at the edge of my senses, but I didn’t move. I was just so tired.

“I will not let you hide from me.”

Julian’s voice came from above me, and I screamed, jumping back from the wall. I landed ungracefully on my butt as I clutched at my chest, willing my heart to slow.

He had, somehow , scaled the building. And now he was crouched in the window, his head tilted as he studied me.

“Are you all right?” he asked.

“You scared me!” I breathed. “How in the world did you climb up here?”

He raised his eyebrow, briefly glancing behind him, down the tower, before he returned his attention to me. “I’m an assassin,” he said, as if that explained everything.

“That’s what you told me,” I replied. I didn’t believe it. “So that means you can clamber up walls like a ninja?”

His lips pressed in a line, and he remained silent, his eyebrow slowly rising as he watched me in that same unnerving way. And now that he was here, it was easier to tell.