Page 4 of Ravished by the Beastly Duke (Regency Beasts #1)

CHAPTER 4

“ I certainly hope whatever it was that happened between you two was worth your reputation.”

Ava’s words were full of ice as she finally turned to glare at Eveline.

Eveline wasn’t too stunned by the incident to be blind to her anger. She had not only ruined her reputation but had also ruined the effort her sister had put into her education for the past ten years since their mother’s passing.

Being only three years older and forced into the role by their father’s lack of care, Ava had spent her waking moments raising her sisters, hoping to see them well-settled in their husbands’ homes. That was the only reason she chose not to have a debut and to avoid getting married.

“Ava, I cannot begin to apologize for what I have done,” Eveline started. “I should never have?—”

“Why were you in that chamber?” Ava asked. “I was looking everywhere for you, and you just… disappeared. You asked me for more independence, and I gave it tonight. I left you dancing with Lord Salsbury, thinking you would behave without my hovering, and what did you do? You threw my generosity in my face. I am sorely disappointed in you.”

“I did not mean to cause a scandal, Ava!” Eveline cried, feeling the first tears spill over. “I only went to get some air to escape your matchmaking schemes. I did not think that chamber would be occupied. You do not understand what it has been like for me this past week, with the matches you’ve attempted to make for me without understanding what I need.”

“And what is that? A love match?” Ava spat. “You have to be realistic, Evie. Love matches seldom happen for us. A wealthy husband you can eventually grow to love will guarantee you and your children a safe future. That is all I have been laboring for. For you and Stella—and now you’ve ruined it.”

“I have never asked you to find me a rich husband! I do not want a man who will not love or respect me!” Eveline cried. “I only want a man who will not see me only as a broodmare to bear heirs. I do not want an unhappy future. I will not stand for it.”

“Evie…” Ava sighed.

There was no ice in her eyes anymore. All that was left was a tired woman who had given up on her dreams for responsibility’s sake.

Eveline felt guilty for being ungrateful.

“I apologize, Ava. I wasn’t thinking,” she said. “I should have left that chamber the moment I realized it was occupied.”

“Indeed, you should have,” Ava replied, worrying her bottom lip with her teeth. “But it has happened now, and there’s nothing we can do about it. I only worry about how this will affect Stella in the future.”

Their youngest sister was only sixteen and was as stubborn as they come. With her debut just a year away, she was excitable and hell-bent on giving Ava headaches for the ideas she was already harboring.

Eveline had not exactly been a good influence on their youngest, as she also was adamant about finding a love match. Now that her reputation was muddied with Ava’s unmarried state, it could only spell doom for their sister’s chances of finding a husband who would not look down on their family.

“I truly have ruined everything, haven’t I?” she sighed. “I was being so selfish by wanting something I should have probably waited to find in my marriage.”

Ava’s eyes softened, and she took Eveline’s hand in her own.

“I understand that you’re not one prone to impulsive action,” she told her. “What spurred this turn of events? Why did you do what you did? I do not need to ask for the truth because I trust you not to be reckless.”

Eveline felt better knowing that her sister still trusted her, but the softness in her tone brought a fresh wave of tears as she realized just how much her foolishness would hurt Stella, as well as the words that were about to spill out of her mouth.

“I… I have… I just wanted to feel beautiful. If only for a moment,” she confessed. “Look at you, Ava. You are the perfect standard of beauty, yet you are not married. I, on the other hand, am not like you. I know I am more voluptuous than is accepted, and a few gentlemen have told me they do not want a wife like me. I began to fear I might never secure a match.”

“Oh, Evie. Why did you never tell me?”

“Because I feared you would not understand.” Eveline bit her lip. “You seem well comfortable with the prospect of never getting married. You seem to thrive on it. I do not think I will be happy in a life without love or passion. I do not want it.”

“You think I am happy being a spinster?” Ava asked with a humorless laugh.

“I do not know,” Eveline answered. “You never complain or look sad. I always assumed…”

“That is because you never look. You are always consumed by your dreams and ideals and disdain for my decision that you never see me. I do not mean to blame you, but I just… I need you to understand that I, too, do not desire a life without love or passion. I just found a purpose outside of it,” Ava replied, a lone tear rolling down her cheek. “You and Stella gave me purpose outside of securing a match for myself, but I also have begun to fear for my future. I fear what will happen when you are both married and I have nothing left to do but manage Father’s household until his heir assumes the title.”

“I did not know?—”

“No, you did not,” Ava interrupted. “I chose not to marry so I could help you and Stella. I had prospects too, but if I had left to my husband’s estate, who would have cared for you two? Father was too deep in his grief to care, and there was no one else I could trust to help you without dimming your spark, so I sacrificed my future for your sakes. Never complaining and hiding my loneliness until I was safely behind my doors so you never feel guilty for it.”

Guilt descended on Eveline like a shroud as she watched her perfect sister crumble before her. She had always assumed her sister was content with the duties she performed—thrived, even. But seeing the broken girl before her, she realized that they were all cut from the same cloth.

Ava was also a little girl with dreams, and now that they were far from her reach, she too would be suffering the gnawing fear of the future that had plagued Eveline as well.

Ava’s arms wound around her sister’s shoulders, and they wept in each other’s arms, finally bonding beyond the veil they had both been wearing. Just as Eveline had been battling insecurities and fear of the future, Ava had been as well—even longer than Eveline could imagine.

When their tears finally subsided, the air between them was pregnant with the weight of the truths that had been revealed, and it was hard for them to meet each other’s eyes.

The vulnerability of the moment left their skin crawling with discomfort, both wondering how to proceed, going forward.

“Was it at least what you hoped it would be?” Ava asked suddenly, breaking the silence.

A cold draft from the window blew out the remains of the oppressive air.

Eveline turned to her sister with wide eyes and raised eyebrows. Had she heard her correctly?

“Surely you cannot mean to tell me that the Duke wasn’t an interesting man to fall into scandal with?” Ava continued.

“Do you know about the Duke?” Eveline asked, letting her curiosity show.

She wanted to know a little bit more about the man she had kissed and then dragged into their current predicament.

“Only a little,” Ava confessed. “He left to join the army at nineteen and returned six months ago, but no one has really seen him since he returned.”

“And I ruined it for him!” Eveline cried.

“Not really,” Ava said with a naughty smile. “It is not every day that a gentleman gets to kiss a pretty girl.”

“Ava!” Eveline gasped, hiding her face in her hands as memories of the Duke’s lips on hers flashed through her mind.

“I am not wrong.” Ava laughed. “I am jealous, actually. You kissed a duke. Was it as magical as the books described? I intend to live vicariously through you in this moment. Tomorrow, we can cry over everything.”

Eveline sighed, letting her head fall back against the seat.

It was beyond magical, she wanted to say. Perhaps the authors had wanted to leave something for reality to fill because they had not mentioned how his kisses would make her body feel like it was on fire or how she would want to lean closer to him even though there was barely any air between them.

“It wasn’t bad,” she said finally, feeling her sister’s questioning glare.

“Surely there was more to it than that, Evie,” Ava teased.

“It is not proper to discuss such things when everything is falling apart.” Eveline sighed.

“You are correct, but it is said that the Duke is a very private person, so I’m sure no one will give heed to the rumors. No one will believe that the stoic Duke can be so easily caught in a scandal.”

“Or they will care too much, and I’ll be the subject of everyone’s conversations over the next few years. After all, I did touch the unreachable Duke,” Eveline pointed out sardonically. “A lot of questions will come from eager debutantes and glares from judgemental mothers. The gentlemen would altogether avoid me. Either way, I am doomed.”

“That is also possible,” Ava muttered, worrying her lip. “I cannot think of a remedy to this now. It is much too sudden and unprecedented.”

That was one other similarity they shared as sisters, apart from their brown eyes. But that was where their resemblance stopped. While Ava had their mother’s lovely blonde hair and their father’s eyes, Eveline and Stella had their father’s chestnut-brown hair—although Stella had their mother’s green eyes. Eveline had inherited her curves from their mother, but the thought had not comforted her as much as it should have.

“Do not give too much thought to it, Evie,” Ava added hastily. “The Duke is also known to be honorable.”

“That does not mean much, Ava. The fact remains that we can do nothing to restore my reputation.” Eveline sighed again.

“The Duke might offer to marry you?” Ava said, sounding hopeful. “That might do some good.”

Marry the girl he had met in such an improper manner? Eveline highly doubted the possibility of that happening and shut down the glimmer of hope that threatened to form in her heart. He had accused her of the very act, sounding like he was disgusted by the prospect. He would never propose to her. Even if he did, she would struggle to accept because it would not be because she had won his heart or because her family’s standing would benefit him.

Her very pride would be wounded.

“I strongly doubt that, Sister.” She frowned.

“But you two shared something,” Ava insisted.

“Yes, but that doesn’t mean he would have to marry me.”

“Still…”

“Can we please not discuss this again, Sister? I would rather put all talk of the Duke behind me and think of a solution,” Eveline said honestly. “I am sure Father’s first decision would be to send me to the country or to Scotland to stay with Aunt Ness.”

“And I will not let him.”

“You know Father.”

“ I have raised you and Stella, so I get the final say on what happens with you two.”

Eveline, overwhelmed with emotion, hugged her sister.

“What would I do without you, Ava?” she asked, sniffing.

“Nothing.”

Eveline let herself enjoy the quiet moment, knowing that the morning would bring the full weight of her actions. But, for now, she would enjoy the newfound friendship with the sister she had always thought of as too serious.

“Now, tell me again. You said the Duke was a good kisser?”

“Ava!”