Page 23 of Ravished by the Beastly Duke (Regency Beasts #1)

CHAPTER 23

T he moment Eveline woke up, she reached behind her for her husband, only to find an empty space.

She felt a dull pain in her chest, and she made to turn just to confirm what she already knew. She felt pain spread through her body, this time from her injured ankle.

It was then that the events of the previous day came rushing back.

She remembered how she had, rather unfortunately, fallen off her horse and twisted her ankle. She also remembered quite vividly her husband’s irrational reaction.

And after the physician had left, he had not bothered to check up on her, not even once. And even worse, he had refused to spend the night in their bed.

Eveline was confused, and at that moment, she decided to get the needed answers.

She lifted her leg off the pillow and moved gingerly to the side of the bed. It was now time for the morning meal, and if she knew her husband well enough, she was certain he would be in the drawing room, breaking his fast.

Eveline summoned Gracie with the bell pull, and after a moment, the maid entered the room.

“Your Grace, you are awake,” Gracie said.

“Indeed, I am,” Eveline responded. “I shall be going down to the drawing room for an early breakfast.”

“But, Your Grace, your foot,” Gracie reminded her, concerned. “Your breakfast can be sent up here so you do not hurt your foot even more.”

Eveline shook her head. “The physician assured me that I can begin to walk around from today. Do not worry, Gracie.”

Soon enough, she was dressed with the help of her lady’s maid, and she leaned on the girl’s arm as she made her way down to the drawing room.

As she had predicted, her husband was there, wolfing down his breakfast. He glanced up from his food when she entered the room, and he rose to his feet.

“Eveline,” he greeted.

For a moment, he seemed rather apologetic, but the look in his eyes disappeared just as quickly as it appeared.

“Should you not be resting your injured ankle, Eveline?” he asked.

“The physician advised that I begin walking around from today,” she responded.

“And is it quite safe?” He still looked worried.

“I suppose I would believe the physician over you on what is safe and what is not,” Eveline retorted, rather scathingly.

She was still quite salty over the fact that her husband, who had been thrown into a state of panic the previous day when she had only twisted her ankle, had not only neglected to check on her but had also been able to have breakfast without seeing her first.

William, however, did not seem to have noticed her foul mood. Or if he had, he did not seem quite bothered.

Gracie helped her to a seat, and breakfast was soon set in front of her.

Eveline tucked into her food, and yet she could not help but be saddened by her husband’s demeanor. They were eating breakfast in silence, and he had not cared enough to spare her a glance ever since she sat down.

She knew something had changed, but she could not quite place it. After all, she and her husband had never eaten a meal in silence before. They always had something to talk about.

“The meal is rather tasty,” Eveline started, looking at her husband to see if she would get a reaction from him.

He stopped eating for a brief second before he grunted in response and returned to his meal.

Eveline sighed. Now she knew for a fact that something was terribly wrong, and she was determined to get to the end of it.

“You did not sleep in our bed last night,” she noted.

This seemed to finally elicit a reaction from him, as he looked up.

“Indeed, I did not,” he responded.

Eveline had expected something, a form of explanation. She deserved that at least, but she had gotten nothing from her husband, who now sat across from her like a complete stranger.

“That is quite unusual, don’t you think?” she pushed.

“It is. I suppose I simply wanted to spend some time alone,” he said simply.

Eveline’s eyes widened with shock. “Spend time alone?” she repeated.

At that moment, she decided to speak in plain words. He had left her no choice.

“I suppose your decision to spend time alone is the reason you did not bother to check up on your wife. It is quite surprising, especially as you had nearly fainted with worry when I had been injured,” she said rather angrily.

This seemed to finally get her husband’s attention, as he set down his cutlery and faced her.

“Eveline,” he said, “I apologize for my rather irrational panic yesterday.”

Eveline did not respond. She only stared at him, willing him to continue.

He let out a long sigh.

Eveline was certain she would not quite like what he was about to say.

“I had to spend the night in my study, as I needed to be alone,” he continued. “I needed time alone to think.”

“To think?” Eveline asked. “And what were you thinking about?”

“I lost control yesterday, and it was unlike me. I needed to know why I had done that,” William said.

Eveline’s heart softened just a bit.

His reason was not an excuse, but now she understood him better.

“It is quite simple, don’t you think?” she responded. “You panicked so much because you were scared that your wife might be severely harmed. It is not irrational at all. After all, you care about me.”

William nodded. “And that, in fact, is the problem. I care about you. I care too much.”

“I would argue that there is no such thing as caring too much. And caring for me is, most definitely, not a problem. Why would you think it is one?”

“This has all been a mistake,” William muttered in a voice so cold she could have sworn it was not her husband who spoke.

“What has been a mistake?” she asked, even though she already knew the answer.

Her worst fear was manifesting right in front of her eyes. Her heart thudded hard in her chest.

“Trying to be more than a friend to you, pretending that we are one happy family,” he said.

Eveline felt a slight pain in her heart. “How so?”

“We do not have to pretend that ours is not only a marriage of convenience.”

She gasped. His words made her dizzy, and she had to put her hand on the table to steady herself.

“Marriage of convenience?” she repeated. “But… but… all these times. We…”

“We are only friends. There is no reason to pretend that we are something more,” he continued, rather cruelly.

Tears welled up in Eveline’s eyes. “But…”

“Eveline,” he said, “you cannot deny the fact that there are no feelings involved. We are only friends staying under the same roof. We do not have to change things.”

Eveline stared at her husband, trying to see if there was even a hint in his eyes that could give her an explanation as to why he was suddenly saying this.

His expression, however, was shuttered. She had never seen something like it before.

“How could you ever say there are no feelings involved?” Eveline choked out, her heart breaking. “Why are you saying these things?”

William shrugged. “Because they are true. You cannot possibly say that feelings are involved.”

“But my feelings are true!” Eveline shouted. “I love you, William.”

The tears she had been holding back now brimmed in her eyes, threatening to fall in torrents.

She quickly looked away and wiped her eyes, determined not to let him see her cry. When she looked back at him, he still had the same shuttered look on his face, as though he was not the one ripping her heart in two.

Her heartbreak gave way to anger.

“William, do you truly want to tell me that you do not have any feelings for me? No matter how little?” she asked, breathing heavily as she tried to keep her anger at bay.

William was silent, and for a moment, Eveline could swear that she saw a flicker of sorrow in his eyes. However, when she blinked, it was gone. His face was devoid of any form of emotion.

She had hoped that he would at least be truthful in his answer. Her fragile heart could not take another blow.

“I truly do not have any feelings for you. I never promised you anything, after all. We were only friends,” he said.

The dull pain in Eveline’s heart grew more intense, spreading across her entire body. She simply could not believe her ears. She wondered briefly if she had been dreaming, and yet she knew she was not.

This was worse than a nightmare.

“If you did not feel anything for me, why did we share a bed then? Why did you sleep with me?” she asked.

“Even if we have shared a bed, that does not change the reality of things.”

Eveline could not take it anymore. She could not take any more of his hurtful words.

She blocked her ears with her palms. “I do not wish to hear any more!” she yelled.

William seemed taken aback, but he finally stopped talking.

How could he ever say that the nights they shared together meant nothing? Did she indeed mean nothing to him?

Eveline looked carefully at him, trying to glimpse even a sign that could reassure her that he did not mean the words he had just said.

And yet the only thing that stared back at her was a pair of hollow eyes.

“William, do you truly expect me to still live in the same house with you, knowing that you never loved me after every moment we shared?” she asked in disbelief.

It would simply be torture, and she was not quite sure she could survive it.

“I suppose you do not have to live in the same house with me,” William said simply.

“What are you trying to say?” Eveline croaked.

“I suppose it is only right that I move out,” he said.

For a moment, Eveline thought the floor had been yanked from underneath her feet.

“I shall move to my estate in Bath,” William added.

Eveline shivered.

William had always thought himself strong. And yet this had been the hardest thing he had ever done.

He had been hoping to put off the conversation with Eveline for as long as possible until he was ready.

However, when she walked in, supported by Gracie and asking him questions, he knew that there was not a better time.

Even at breakfast, while she had tried to make conversations with him, his resolve had faltered, and he had wondered if he could go through with his decision. Not only because it would break her, but also because it would break even him in the worst way possible.

He had watched her confusion give way to anger and then sadness, and he had even seen her fight back her tears quite a number of times, and he had ached to take back his words.

The only thing that had stopped him from doing that was the fact that this was the best decision for her.

The hurt that clouded Eveline’s eyes when he mentioned that he was moving out of the castle was palpable.

“Certainly, you do not mean that. Do you?” she asked, the tears she had held at bay for so long finally spilling over.

William reached out to wipe her tears but he quickly caught himself.

He was not quite certain what to say, so he began to ramble.

“I imagine it will be hard for you to have to be in the same house with me, especially now. My presence would probably only cause you grief.”

Eveline did not seem to find his words so comforting, as her eyes narrowed into angry slits.

“You do not have to worry about not causing me grief, William,” she said in a scathing tone. “Your words already did.”

“Eveline, I?—”

“I would have wished that you would be truthful as to why you do not want me,” she continued.

William knew he could not do that. After all, if he expressed his fears, his wife would probably only seek to reassure him until he foolishly believed her… again.

“You must believe me, Eveline,” he insisted. “I have told you.”

“You have not told me anything beyond that we are simply friends and you do not have feelings for me. If you were truly a man, you would simply tell me that I am not good enough for you and it is for that reason that you have chosen to abandon me.”

William felt a deep, piercing pain in his heart. How could she ever think she was not good enough?

Even as he regarded her, her eyes flashing with anger, he knew the opposite to be true.

Eveline was too good for him.

And that was the problem. He could not forgive himself if he lost her, especially now that he had grown to care for her. And it is for this reason that he must detach himself from her.

“Do not utter such words,” he pleaded.

“And yet you cannot refute my words,” she said simply, her eyes daring him to prove her wrong. “William, tell me that you think that I am not good enough for you.”

“How could you ever think that? Eveline, you are good enough for any man.”

“Then why am I not good enough for you?” she asked.

But you are. In fact, you are too good for me.

Instead, William kept quiet, watching her wipe her tears away angrily.

“I apologize for this, Eveline. I truly do,” he offered, despite knowing that it really would not console her.

“Do not insult me with your apology,” Eveline snapped as she rose to her feet.

She winced in pain the moment she stood up, and she sat right back immediately.

William rushed to her side. “Are you fine, Eveline?” he asked, and he immediately made to check her leg.

Eveline held out her hand to stop him. “Do not touch me!” she sneered.

William was taken aback. “I only want to make sure that your ankle is fine.”

“My ankle and my well-being are no longer your responsibility, I assure you,” she retorted.

“You are still married to me, therefore I deserve to know,” he insisted. “And we are still living under the same roof.”

“You no longer have to worry about that, and you do not have to go to your estate in Bath. I shall move back to my father’s house.”

William was shocked, as he had not anticipated this.

“But… but you cannot,” he stammered.

“And why can I not?”

He was not quite certain what to say.

“Because you are still my wife, and I need to know that you are fine at all times.”

“And how will you know if I am safe when you are in Bath?” she asked.

Once again, William was at a loss for words.

“What kind of husband are you if you cannot bear to be under the same roof as your wife?” she continued. “I shall return to my father’s house, where I can be with my family. I have no reason to stay here alone, after all.”

William knew she was right, and yet he could not bear it. If his wife left his home, then that might suggest that their marriage was at an end.

Right in his presence, Eveline summoned her lady’s maid, who helped her up. “Gracie, pack some of my items. I am returning to my father’s house.”

With that, she left the drawing room, all the while leaning against her maid for support.

“Eveline,” William called.

Eveline stopped.

“This will remain your home if you ever decide to return,” William said. “But I will not be here.”

Without as much as a glance at him, Eveline left the drawing room. He remained there, wondering if he had truly made the right decision. And even some moments later, when the footmen began to carry his wife’s trunks to the carriage, he was still unsure.

He remained in the drawing room when his wife finally left the estate, watching from the window as the carriage took her away.

The castle suddenly felt empty and haunted the moment Eveline left, and William knew it was only because he missed her.

I must leave for Bath at once.

He was certain that a change in scenery was what he needed. He believed he would feel better in Bath.