Page 26 of Protected from Malice (Blade and Arrow Shadow Team #1)

And with it a determination that tonight we’ll be doing more than kissing.

Because I’ve been thinking about it a lot—the whole having sex with Rafe thing.

I know he’s worried about rushing me, though he hasn’t come right out and said it.

But I’m not worried. I’ve known Rafe for over a decade and I’m certain he wouldn’t do anything to hurt me.

And if I do get anxious about anything, he’ll help me through it.

Rafe casts a quick look back into the hallway and gives a quick chin lift. “Thanks, W. I really appreciate this.”

Eeep. How did I forget Webb is out there? No doubt hearing every word of Rafe and my conversation.

“Hang on,” Rafe says with a little smirk. Then he turns to grab something just hidden out of view. “Step back, okay?”

A few seconds later, he wheels a covered dining cart through the door and closes it securely behind him. Once he fastens all three locks, Rafe turns back to me. “Since I can’t take you out,” he explains, gesturing to the cart, “I thought I’d bring the date to you.”

“Oh.” I beam at him. “What is it?”

He wraps one arm around my waist and leads me into the living room while pushing the cart with the other. Once we stop, he says, “Close your eyes.”

Excitement bubbles through me. Squinching my eyes shut, I ask, “Is it dinner? I think I smell?—”

“Eden.” There’s laughter in Rafe’s voice. “You’ll see in a second.”

A soft rustling sound follows. Then the faint clink of metal on metal. Finally, Rafe says, “Alright. Open your eyes.” A beat, and then more quietly, “I hope you like it.”

“I’m sure I?—”

But as soon as I look at the cart, the rest of my words disappear.

A lump lodges in my throat.

My nose burns.

“I thought we could enjoy some of your favorites,” he explains while I stare wordlessly in wonder. “Food. Activities. Presents…”

“Rafe.” My voice wobbles a little as I approach the cart.

On top of it sits an assortment of my favorite things.

First, a stack of board games—Scrabble, Scattergories, Risk, and Settlers of Catan.

Beside them is a pizza box, still steaming a little.

A bouquet of pink roses is arranged in a squat, round glass vase, and just to its side is an adorable stuffed elephant with a pink bow around its neck.

“It’s a dill pickle pizza,” Rafe says, lifting the lid of the box to give me a peek.

“I remember how much you liked it back in Boston. I thought we could have pizza, maybe watch a movie, play one of the games… and the elephant—” His cheeks go ruddy.

“I just thought he’d be nice to hold if you’re having trouble sleeping. ”

A beat passes. Then he adds, “Not that I wouldn’t keep you company. But I would never assume?—”

My chest goes tight as emotion swells inside me.

“Rafe.” I fling myself at him, and he catches me with a startled oof.

His hand strokes down my back. “Does that mean you like it?”

I nod, bumping his chin. “It’s amazing. All of it. The games, and the pizza, and the flowers and elephant… I love all of it.”

“I thought every date should have flowers. And I know you like pink.”

“But the pizza. I can’t believe you remembered.”

“How could I not? I’ll never forget your smile when I brought back the first pickle pizza. That smile got me through two months in Afghanistan.”

“Oh, Rafe.” My throat goes thick. “I wish I could have?—”

What? Been with him back then?

But he wouldn’t have agreed to that. Not being overseas so much.

Not when his job was so dangerous. He said it himself the other night, after our big relationship talk.

“Even if I thought I was good enough for you back then,” Rafe explained, “I wouldn’t have done anything.

It wouldn’t have been fair. I wouldn’t have been around for you the way I should have been. ”

Then his expression clouded, and I could tell he was thinking about what happened two years ago. How, in his mind, he wasn’t there for me then. It’s not true; whether we’d been together or not, he couldn’t have protected me all the time. But that’s something I’m not sure we’ll ever agree on.

Rafe kisses me. Then he says, “I wish I could have, too. But we’re together now.”

“We are,” I agree. “And that’s the most important thing.”

And as I look into Rafe’s eyes, I’m filled with renewed certainty.

This is right. Me and Rafe. Maybe it took us a long time, and it didn’t happen conventionally, but we’re here. Together.

Finally.

Framing his face with my hands, I pull him in for another kiss. I’m not slow or careful about it. Not this time. This time, I show Rafe just how much I want him.

I press my body against his, feeling the evidence of his arousal nudging at my stomach. It’s not scary. Not intimidating. All it does is intensify the need burning inside me.

His arms come around me, hugging me close. One hand drifts below the swell of my butt, the other comes to the back of my neck. A low rumble sounds in his chest.

As our kiss deepens, fire surges through me, turning my skin aflame. Every touch sends sizzles of electricity across my skin. Desire throbs at my core.

Just for a moment, gratitude takes over everything.

I’m not broken. I’d worried about it, of course. I was afraid I might never want to be intimate with a man again. But with Rafe…

I want. I need. But only him.

As the fire consumes me, I feel my nipples tightening. My panties go damp. Our kiss grows more desperate; tongues lashing and teeth bumping.

My hands come to his biceps, feeling hard muscle and restrained strength beneath them.

“Eden,” Rafe murmurs as he drags his mouth from mine. “Shit, baby. You feel so damn good.”

“So do you,” I reply breathlessly. “All of you.”

Then, in a bold move, I reach one hand inside his pants. I palm his straining erection, the heat of it searing into my skin.

He twitches against me. Thickens. Surges.

“Fuck,” he grits out. “Ah, fuck, baby.”

“I want you,” I tell him. “Not in a week or a month. But now.”

Rafe gazes down at me, his brows pinching together. “Our date.”

“We can reheat the pizza. Play games and eat after.”

“I don’t want to rush you,” he insists. “I didn’t come here expecting anything. However long it takes for you to be ready?—”

“I’m ready now.” My heart stutters as uncertainty hits me. “Unless you don’t want?—”

“Of course I do.” Those two-toned eyes flash with hunger. “Fuck, Eden. Of course I want to be with you. But I don’t want to hurt you. Scare you.”

“You won’t.” Seeing Rafe’s worry makes me even more certain.

He’ll do anything to protect me. To make sure this is as perfect as I always dreamed it would be.

“You couldn’t. I trust you, Rafe. And this…

” My face warms. “I’ve thought about being with you for a long time.

A really long time. And I don’t want to wait anymore. ”

Rafe stares at me for a few moments, emotion working in his eyes. “How long have you thought about being with me?”

“Um.”

He strokes my cheek. “How long?”

“Since the first weekend you came to visit with Indy,” I admit. “After we all went to bed. I got up and you were in the kitchen, getting something to drink. All you were wearing was a pair of shorts, and I thought… you were the sexiest man I’d ever seen.”

“Eden,” he breathes. His erection jumps. “I remember that night. You looked so pretty in your little sleep shorts and T-shirt, your hair curling all over the place?—”

“A mess, you mean.”

“No.” He caresses my hair. “Untamed. Natural. Gorgeous.”

“So… If I’ve wanted you since then. And you wanted me. Hasn’t it been long enough already?”

It looks like he’s fighting with himself. Inwardly debating between his wants and fears.

Then he scoops me into his arms. He captures my lips. As he carries me into the bedroom, he says, “You tell me the second you feel uncomfortable. Do not worry about upsetting me. Or disappointing me. You can’t.”

“I know.” I place my hand over his chest. His heart is pounding. “I’ll tell you.”

Just before we reach the bed, Rafe sets me back on my feet. He steps back to look at me again, devouring me with his gaze. “I want to see all of you. Is that okay?”

“Yes. As long as I get to see all of you, too.”

“Of course.” While I watch, he unbuttons his pants and shoves them down. Stepping out of them, he kicks them to the side, then peels off his shirt. Left only in a pair of black briefs, he stands before me. “The rest?” he asks.

I nod before answering in a breathless whisper, “Yes, please.”

I can’t stop looking at him. At his golden skin and all those incredible tattoos and the lines of muscle carved into his body.

At the eight pack—at least—covered with a dusting of dark hair that tapers down below his waist. At the breadth of his shoulders and the way his arm muscles flex as he moves.

And at the way he keeps his eyes on me, constantly checking to make sure I’m okay.

Once he’s naked, I move towards him. Close enough to finally touch the tattoos inked across his chest. To trace the twin arrows intersecting a blade just above his heart, which I know represents the insignia of the Green Berets.

“Eden.” He sucks in a breath as I trail my fingers down his abdomen. “Ah, fuck, baby. Feeling your hands on me like that…”

I wrap my hand around him, stroking his velvety heat. He’s slick with excitement, growing thicker and harder the longer I touch him. Taking my time with it, I explore him—seeing what he likes best and memorizing it for the next time.

All through it, Rafe stays still. He watches me with hunger in his eyes. His hands fist. The tendons in his neck go tight.

He likes what I’m doing. And it makes me feel powerful.

I’m not sure how much time passes before Rafe gently catches my hand and pulls it away from him. “I love this,” he says. “But you’re going to make me come if you keep doing that. And there’s no way I’m finishing before you. Especially not our first time.”