Page 19 of Protected from Malice (Blade and Arrow Shadow Team #1)

Ah, fuck.

My arms come around her, gently hugging her against me. “I will always be here to protect you, Eden. No matter who else is around. That’s a promise.”

A beat later, I’m gripped with uncertainty.

What am I thinking; hugging her without asking first?

Just because she said it was fine doesn’t mean?—

Then she hugs me back.

Her head comes to my shoulder.

Her breath brushes against my neck.

Like before, she leans into me, giving me her weight.

It’s not a quick, friendly hug, like the ones I’d allow myself in the past.

It’s trust.

She’s trusting me to support her.

My hand comes to her nape, working out the stress knotted into her muscles.

Eden sighs. Her body relaxes.

The feel of her breasts pressing against my chest tempts my mind into wandering to more dangerous places.

Places where I’m not here for her protection, but simply because she wants me here. Where I could kiss her. Explore the feelings I’ve been ruthlessly tamping down since the first time I met her.

But that’s not reality. Not now, at least.

And holding Eden is a temptation that’s almost impossible to resist. I will, of course. I’d rather die than do anything to hurt her, or push her into something she’s not ready for. So it’s with reluctance that I finally release her and lean back to inspect her face.

She looks okay. At least, she’s not crying. Or visibly upset. If anything, she looks happier than when I came into the bedroom, so that’s a relief.

Disappointment flashes across her face, but she quickly hides it.

“So.” She takes a deep breath and lets it out slowly. “How is Indy?”

I put a few inches between us again, but I’m not sure whose sake it’s for—hers or mine. “He’s at the gym with Ace.”

Her brow wrinkles. “He went to the gym? Now ?”

“Sometimes it helps,” I explain. “Working out, I mean. Pushing yourself to the point where all you can do is concentrate on getting through the physical part of it.”

Understanding dawns. Eden nods. “So he doesn’t have to think about how upset he is.”

“Just for now. Just until it’s not as fresh.”

“I get it. Like my self-defense classes. Or when I’m home, I work on my puzzles. It’s not physical activity, but it keeps my mind occupied on other things.”

“Exactly. Like hiking for me. Or running.”

Her lips twitch. “Or playing your trivia games?”

“Like playing my trivia games,” I agree. “Wracking my brain while I try to remember who scored the winning run in the final game of the 2018 World Series or which of the elements is the heaviest.”

“Oganesson.” Eden grins. “I had to memorize the atomic number and mass of all the elements for my organic chemistry class.”

Her smile makes my heart lift. “Of course you’d know all of them, Brain.”

“Well, I had to. The professor made us. It’s not like I did it for fun.” She nudges my arm. “I bet you studied the periodic table just so you could do better in trivia. Am I right?”

I nudge her back. “Maybe.”

Eden thinks for a second. “I bet we’d be good playing trivia together. You know, at one of the trivia nights the bars host? Have you been to one of those before?”

“Seen them? Yes. Actually competed? No.”

“No? There must be some decent places in Corpus Christi. Aren’t there?”

“I suppose. I don’t go out much, really.”

Well, aside from the occasional hookup, but I’m not mentioning that.

Besides, if Eden were there, I wouldn’t go to the bars at all.

“I went a couple of times with some people from work,” Eden says. “It was okay. But they were more interested in drinking and checking out all the other people. Not in actually winning.”

“Oh, so you’d get all competitive, huh?” I tease. “Would you have official team T-shirts made? Assign study topics to everyone?”

She blushes. “Maybe.” A beat. “Is that weird?”

As I look at Eden’s sweet face, I’m seized with the urge to wrap her up and take her with me everywhere. Carry her around so I can always protect her.

It’s the craziest feeling. I’ve always felt protective of Eden—probably excessively so, considering she’s not mine to protect. But this .

It’s not just desire. It’s need.

And it’s all-encompassing.

I’ve never been a romantic guy. But this… It feels like my heart cracked wide open and Eden walked right inside.

My pulse thunders so hard I’m surprised she can’t hear it.

Carefully, not wanting to give my feelings away, I reply, “No. It’s not weird. I think it’s a great idea.”

“You do?” The embarrassed pink turns to that of pleasure. “I always thought it would be funny. The T-shirt part at least. Or if people didn’t want to wear shirts, we could do hats. Although I don’t really look good in them.”

“What do you mean you don’t look good in hats?” I lightly tug at a curl and release it. “I have a hard time believing that.”

“It’s true.” Eden pats her hair. “First, my hair curls all weird around it. And then when I take the hat off, the top part of my hair is all flat and frizzy. It looks terrible.”

“I bet you look cute.”

Eden pinks up again. “I don’t. Trust me.”

Before I can stop myself, I say, “Well, once this is over, we’ll have to find a place to play trivia. And we’ll have some hats and T-shirts made. Then I’ll decide if you look weird or cute.”

Her brows arch up. “Would you want to? Stay in Portland for a little while? After?”

I know I should say no. I should say I have to get back to Texas as soon as Eden’s situation—case—is resolved. I should stop torturing myself with wishes that can’t come true and of princesses who deserve white knights and not broken men, like me.

But I can’t tell her no.

I don’t want to.

Dammit, I want to go to trivia with Eden. I want to see her in her cute little hat and T-shirt, her cheeks flushed with excitement as she answers question after question correctly. I want to cheer with her when we win—because between my addiction to trivia and Eden’s smarts, I’m sure we will.

Even if I’m just there as her friend, it would be worth it.

“What would you want our shirts to say?” I ask.

Her lips purse. “I know I should say something really intellectual. Like… the Mighty Mitochondria or something. But?—”

A laugh bubbles up. “The Mighty Mitochondria?”

“Stop.” Eden gives me a playful shove. “It’s science-y. People would be intimidated.”

I raise my eyebrows at her. “I’m not sure about intimidated .”

Giggling, she concedes, “Okay. Maybe not Mighty Mitochondria. The Devious Double Helixes?”

Now I’m outright laughing. “If that’s what you want the name to be.”

“It has a nice ring to it,” Eden says defensively. But she’s laughing, too. And it’s so damn good to see her laughing like this, it renews my determination to make it happen again.

“Actually,” she continues, “I had a sillier name in mind. So people would underestimate us. We could call ourselves the Sneaky Cheeseburgers.”

“The Sneaky Cheeseburgers ? Where did you come up with that?”

“I don’t know. It just came to me one day, and I thought it sounded funny.”

“It does,” I agree, “and if that’s what you want the team name to be, it’s fine with me.”

“So you’re going to stay in Portland for a little while? Long enough to go to trivia a couple of times?”

“Absolutely.”

Shit. What did I just agree to?

Do I want to torture myself?

Then again, Eden’s smile makes any torture worthwhile.

“One of my friends is an artist,” I add. “Levi. He was on Ace’s team. Back when we all lived on base, he’d make these caricatures of everyone. They were really good. I bet he’d be happy to create a team logo for us.”

Eden stares at me, emotion working in her eyes. Her smile sobers. “Rafe.”

Something pulls at me.

Not something. Someone. Eden .

Like she’s a magnet, and I’m inescapably drawn to her.

Fuck. I want her so badly it’s hard to breathe.

Not just her body, though I think she’s the most gorgeous woman I’ve ever seen. I want all the parts of Eden that make her so special. Her kindness. Her intelligence. Her sense of humor. Her bravery.

And somehow, in all of this mess, I think she wants me .

But dammit, I’m not right for her.

“Rafe,” she repeats. This time her voice is huskier. Needier.

My body erupts with heat. Desire. “What?”

She puts her hand on my arm and leans in. Her rosy lips part. “I…”

I think she wants to kiss me.

And I want to let her.

Because, despite how badly I want Eden, if we did kiss, I’d let her have control.

I’ve always been more of the dominant type. Not that I want women to call me sir and be my submissive—there’s nothing wrong with that, it’s just not my thing—but I’ve typically been the one taking the lead.

But given what Eden’s been through, I wouldn’t.

“Rafe.” It’s barely a whisper. Her pupils dilate until there’s only a thin ring of blue around them. She leans even closer. So close I could just dip my head…

But she just told her brother about something traumatic. Something she was just crying about.

Tyler and Webb are right outside.

Indy could come back any minute.

Fuck.

I want to kiss her. But I know I shouldn’t.

“I’m not broken,” Eden says quietly. “Bruised. But not broken.”

Ah, fuck.

“I know.” I cup her cheek. “I know you’re not.”

And then, before I fall prey to my desires, I hug Eden against me again.

I stroke her hair, combing my fingers through it.

My lips press to the top of her head.

Dammit, I wish I could kiss her.

But most of the time, the right choice is the hardest one.