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Seven

DIMITRI

J axon glares at me as the wheels in his head work overtime. So much happened back then, so much we kept from each other as we fought our demons and took it out on Hope. I can’t blame him for not knowing. I don’t think she’d want me to know either.

I slide my phone out of my back pocket and search for my dad’s number. I haven’t spoken to him in years, and I wasn’t planning on changing that but I don’t see another choice. I click on his name and press the phone to my ear, waiting for him to pick up.

It surprises me that Coach didn’t realize Hope went after Jaxon, but seeing he’s emptying his third beer, I can’t blame him. The room is probably spinning by now.

My dad told me Coach wasn’t always like this, that there was a time where he had this calm over him and helped out wherever he could. In my opinion he still does—he’s helping us.

Hope’s mother left him, and that changed him. At least, that’s what my dad said the moment he heard I went over here. He was thrilled, happy. But he just wanted me out of the house, gone.

I’m a burden.

Always have been, from the moment I came crying into this word and took the most precious person from him. My mother, his wife.

He blames me for it, always trying to keep me at a distance, pushing me away when I need a dad. It all taught me one thing: I don’t need anyone to take care of me.

I’m used to the loneliness, I’m used to the guilt.

The only moments I feel more human, more alive are when I’m on the field. When I’m putting my pain onto someone else.

“Dimitri, you were a beast today on the field,” Coach gushes and I nod.

“Thanks, Coach,” I say and soft footsteps hurry back into the living room. I catch Hope’s gaze. A flick of hurt lingers inside it and it makes me wonder what happened between her and Jaxon.

“Ah, there she is, my little angel. Come here,” Coach says and pats his lap.

My brows pinch and I glance at Knox, who seems unfazed as she hesitantly takes her seat. She squirms slightly and he slaps her ass softly.

“I’m sorry for lashing out, angel, I’ll make it up to you in a little bit. Go get ready,” he says and nudges her off his lap and to the hallway.

Confusion rings but who am I to judge?

“What do you want?” My dad’s voice cuts me back and I blink away the fuzz.

“As loving as always, Dad,” I say, a fake smile curling on my lips.

He huffs and silence takes over.

“We can’t find Coach.” My voice wavers and softens. “Do you know where he might be?”

“Last I heard he was going to see you three,” he mutters.

I clear my throat. “He was here, but he… he left quickly, and we can’t seem to find him. He didn’t go back home.”

“You’re a worthless piece of shit, you know that? It should’ve been you who died that day. You took her from me!”

My head whips to the side; my jaw throbs as blood drips from my lips.

“Dad,” I groan.

“Don’t call me that!” he yells, his boot slamming into my stomach and sending me tumbling to the ground.

I roll my shoulders as his words still haunt me. Reminding me I’m nothing.

“Listen, I don’t know where he is… just… fuck. Dimitri, I really didn’t need you calling me today .”

I can’t stop the words from spilling. “I’m sorry.” I’ve said them too many times, but they never made a difference.

The line goes dead and my head drops.

Today. I didn’t even realize what day it was until now. It’s a day that’s never been celebrated or talked about, even after I left home, so why would I bother to remember it? All it’s ever meant is my dad doesn’t want to be my dad, doesn’t want to see me.

Today has always been a day for mourning, not for celebration. A day to stay out of the house, to avoid everyone and everything. It hasn’t changed.

My birthday.

Her death day.

“Dimitri?” Jaxon asks and I shake my head.

“He won’t,” I mumble with a tremble in my hands. “He won’t give me anything.”

I’m waiting in my dad’s office at the police station since I got expelled today. Got in some fight with someone I don’t even know the name of, but I had to fight. I had to get my hands dirty.

I perk in my seat as I watch Hope stroll inside the police station. She’s wearing a short-sleeve shirt and her skin is covered in bruises. She rubs over her arm and her lips move as she speaks to my dad. I edge closer, trying to hear. But the window between us keeps us at a distance.

Did she fall? Did someone hurt her?

Tears roll down her cheeks, her bottom lip trembles, and an unusual sensation trickles down my spine.

I always enjoyed hurting others but this… this is different.

To see her so broken, so small. It makes this itch rise, this need to be the one who hurts her. But not in a bad way, or maybe a little. A little pain in the right way makes things better and I know how to dole that out. She’d like it. It might be bad, but not terrible.

She shifts on her feet, her thighs rubbing together, and my cock twitches in my pants. A smile tugs on my lips as I wonder if she would welcome my touch or push me away. And I’m eager to find out.

I shake my head and shame rushes through me next. It wasn’t only my dad’s fault for not helping her—it was mine too.

I saw her and did nothing but add oil the fire she was fighting.

All because I saw something I wanted for the first time.

All because I chose myself over her.

And now all I see is her, nervous, glancing around with a look I now know was her pleading for help. No one would help her. No one would see it. Because of us. We’d sided with Coach and decisions have consequences. We muffled her voice, made it so no one would believe her.

“Dimitri!” Jax yells. His breath fans over my face and snaps me from my thoughts. “What do you mean he won’t give you anything? You didn’t even try! That wasn’t even a minute-long phone call!”

“He won’t help,” I say again. There’s no point in explaining why. Jaxon wouldn’t understand. “It doesn’t matter if it’s thirty minutes, he won’t do a damn thing for us.”

He shakes his head with a scoff. “You don’t know that, you barely tried. Call him again, now.”

“No,” I reply sharply. “You don’t know him. Calling more isn’t going to—”

“You’re going to let her spend more time with him when we could have help! Do you want her dad to fuck her? Do you want it online where anyone can access it and use it against her? Has losing her fucked you up that much?!”

“Don’t get in my face, Jaxon,” I warn darkly, nearly cracking my phone as my hands curl into fists. “Not today, not about this.”

“It’s your fucking father! Tell him this shit is serious! He’s a cop! He should care that Hope’s missing and you didn’t even—”

“She went to him for help and he didn’t do a fucking thing and now you think that he’s going to spring into action to help her? He trusts her dad! That hasn’t changed!”

“So you’re going to give up. You’re not going to get the police involved when it could help her because you have some daddy issues and you’re sure that he’s going to—”

“Don’t you start with me,” I warn in a dangerous hiss.

Daddy issues is a serious phrase to throw around me.

Jaxon might not know it, but I expect more from our years of friendship.

I want to get Hope too. There’s no bridge I wouldn’t burn, but I’m not going to waste time for some illusion of a solution.

My father—no matter how much I badger him—isn’t going to do anything today.

“You really don’t give a fuck? You could be doing more! We’re supposed to be different than in high school and you’re letting her stay with him again !”

“You didn’t do shit either!” I yell. “When exactly did you grab her and pull her off his lap at dinner? When did you bring a video of him fucking her to the police? When did you step in and ask if she wanted her dad like he told us?”

Jaxon stews. I see all the warning signs.

He’s going to break me in half—or try to.

He’s going to grab my phone, shove it against my head while beating the shit out of me (my dad will love it), then demand answers or he’ll kill me.

My dad will encourage him to do it and to let him listen.

Then Jax will know exactly why my dad won’t help.

“How fucking dare you. You didn’t do shit either and now—”

“I’m telling you this is a dead end,” I hiss, struggling to control my own temper. “ He’s a dead end. He won’t help. He’s wrapped around Coach’s finger and if we say that Coach kidnapped Hope, my dad will shrug and say that she probably deserved it or is lying about it.”

He huffs. “You don’t know that.”

“He didn’t do a damn thing when she told my dad what hers was doing to her. He took her back home and told her to stop spreading rumors. He laughed with her dad about her rebellion. Is that the kind of man who’s going to help us, Jax? Is that the kind of man you want me to waste time—”

“Shut up,” Jaxon snarls, taking a menacing step forward. “You always do this.”

“Do what?” I ask as I rise up to meet him.

“Talk big, then do nothing. Knox is hunting them down and we’re supposed to be giving him a fucking direction and you won’t man up and deal with your dad.”

“Jaxon.”

“You never follow through. You do just enough,” Jaxon snarls, then shoves me. “So if something happens to her, if he manages to touch her, if he lays another hand on her from this point on… it’s on you.”

“Then you figure some shit out instead of threatening people, saying you don’t want to see things, and lashing out!” I demand. “Since you have all the answers, give them to Knox!” I toss the phone to him and turn to walk away.

“Don’t you fucking walk away!”

I linger. “I don’t need you here for any of this shit. You pace, bark demands, then threaten with your fucking fists. If this is friendship or a taste of what Hope’s in for, then I hope she escapes on her own and you never see her again.”

I regret the words as soon as they’re out of my mouth, but I’m not taking them back.

Not today, not right now. Instead, I head to my apartment.

I can’t deal with Jaxon and fix this problem.

If he wants something done, he can figure it out on his own.

I’m going to try to look at this a different way since we’ve spent too much time on watching the worst moments of Hope’s life.

There has to be something in Coach’s past that will bring us to him. There has to be something that my dad knows about, but won’t share. Knox is at the house finding what he can, so now it’s time I do the same by looking into his past, his investments, any properties he owns.

I’m sure Jaxon is fuming or beating the shit out of the apartment I just left, but that’s his problem now. If he can’t handle the fact that waiting is part of the process, then he can’t handle being with Hope. Honestly, I’m not even sure if he wants her for the right reasons anymore.

Having her just to make sure her dad doesn’t isn’t good enough.

I sigh and wring my hands together.

Happy fucking birthday to me.