Page 27 of Poppy Kisses (Return to Coal Haven #3)

Chapter Fourteen

Poppy

I was upstairs in the Perez house when I heard the front door open and close.

“You should keep this locked when you’re here alone.”

I wiped my hands off on a rag and screwed the lid on the paint I’d picked up this morning. I left my future office and stood at the top of the stairs. “It’s Coal Haven.”

Jensen gazed up at me from the base of the stairs. He was wearing work jeans that were already spattered with paint and a different gray shirt than he had on this morning. “Sorry I’m late.”

“It’s just painting and cleaning.” He’d called and said a potential client had gotten a hold of him. Since Auggie was with Erin, Jensen said he could look at the project and prepare an estimate. That way, he wouldn’t have to email. “How’d it go?”

He shrugged. “Good. They want new cabinets in the kitchen and laundry room—all brand new, and then asked me to install the old ones in the garage for a workspace.”

“Doable?”

“Of course.” He took the stairs two at a time.

“I’m covered in paint.”

“It’ll wash off.” He planted a kiss on me. My back hit the wall. I giggled into his mouth.

“Don’t forget what night it is,” he said against my lips.

“Saturday night.”

“Date night.”

Dates and sex. Either/or was one thing. Was both at the same time smart? I went still and he pulled back, concern in his eyes.

“What’d I say wrong?” he asked, suddenly serious.

“I don’t know if date night and fucking should go together.”

Realization dawned in his eyes, chased by disappointment. Then his gaze went neutral.

“I’m sorry,” I whispered.

He stroked the backs of his fingers down my cheek. “For what?”

“I keep pushing you away.” What if, someday, he kept that distance between us? “I just don’t want to confuse myself.”

I had trash taste in men, but Jensen didn’t fit in that category.

So if he let me go after our year of marriage was up?

I’d be devastated. Everything I had was getting invested into this house and this business.

I wouldn’t be able to pick up and move. I’d just be crushed and have to see the crusher around town.

“I understand.” He kissed my forehead and stepped away, his movements stiff. “How about we add another rule to our agreement?”

My nod was jerky. “What?”

“You make the first move.”

“Oh.” Why did that bother me? He was giving me all the power.

“That way, you’re not going out of your comfort zone.”

That made sense, but there was something off. His shuttered expression didn’t match his tone. Just then, a text made my phone vibrate. I didn’t make a move for it.

“Go ahead,” he said softly. “Answer it.”

Since I didn’t know what else to do, I retrieved the phone from my pocket.

Clover: When are we going dress shopping?

Oh. The dress. The wedding. I hadn’t started planning much. Rattler’s was catering. Alder said he’d round up the tables and chairs. That left one main thing. “Clover wants to go dress shopping.”

“Sounds fun. Can’t wait to see you in a dress.”

Old memories crowded into my brain. “Really?”

“One hundred and ten percent. One giant leg tease. I’ll be hard all day.”

The comparison game demanded to be played.

Me in a wedding dress versus Hassie in a wedding dress.

But all the comments about my legs slowly erased what he’d said when we were younger.

I was tired of comparing myself to her. She was someone I hadn’t seen in twenty years, and I may not see her for twenty more.

* * *

Jensen

I pulled the potatoes out of the oven. Auggie hated baked potatoes and the texture, so when he was gone, I made them for myself.

Poppy was in the bathroom taking a shower and cleaning the paint off herself.

She’d been distant since I told her to start making the first move, but I couldn’t be that guy again, begging for his wife’s attention and getting turned away.

Didn’t mean I didn’t want Poppy with every breath I took. It did mean I was at her beck and call, should she choose to come calling, and that was an easier place to be. Supposedly.

I tugged at the collar of my shirt like it was slowly tightening around my neck and finished getting the rest of the meal ready.

“Smells delicious.” She came out of the bathroom, squeezing the ends of her hair with one of my blue towels.

She wore my favorite leggings and an oversized black shirt.

The sight of her being so domestic in my home never failed to clench all those knots in my chest. The instinctual I want this came right after.

Now that we’d had sex, the sensation only got stronger.

“Auggie fails to see the potential in the toppings.” I gestured to the crispy chicken, bacon, shredded cheese, olives, tomatoes, onions, lettuce, sour cream, salsa, and I even added diced ham and sliced cucumbers to give her more options.

She studied the selections lined up on the island. “So the potatoes are a vehicle for a bacon salad?”

“Basically.”

“Auggie’s a smart kid. He’ll see it eventually.”

I went still. “It means a lot that you say that.”

“That he’s smart?” Surprise resonated in her voice.

“It’s something I never got. And when I talk to Mom, all she remembers are the teachers who treated her like crap and made her feel small.” In Coal Haven, many of them had been my teachers too.

“It’s nice to be in a time when we understand more.” She slid onto a stool and grabbed a plate. “And we can do something about it. Someday, I hope to be out of a job.”

“Yeah?”

“I know how expensive it is to get tutoring. Debbie’s had so many families have to drop out because they couldn’t afford it, and that’s with the cost offset by fundraising.

One family who graduated out told me that she estimated spending forty grand on tutoring over the ten years she had kids in it. ”

“Fuck me. I hadn’t calculated how much I’m in for already. He needs it. I’ll make it happen.” I enjoyed watching her pick through the selections and load up on the same things I would, except for the onions.

“Right? Debbie said they wiped out savings and racked up credit card debt. It shouldn’t be like that. Debbie asked me to help her with the next legislative session.”

“You should be mandatory in all the schools.”

“I don’t always get along with the administration.” She popped a piece of bacon in her mouth.

“Is that the real reason why you left Wyoming?”

She stiffened and her gaze darted around, but she kept chewing. “No, the timing was right.” The way she cut open her potato was stabbing it and ripping it apart. Was she hungry or pissed off? She sighed and put her knife down. “I argued too much.”

“Poppy, I don’t believe it.” When she playfully scowled at me, I chuckled. I wanted to keep the tone light, mostly to keep her talking. “I know you’re in the right without asking.”

“I dunno. I should’ve played ball more.”

I slid my plate next to hers and sat down. We could be closer than when we sat at the island. “Poppy, one hundred percent if you thought something was wrong, it was.”

“The caseload was too high. Over and over. So many kids needed help, but the school system would hire another administrator instead of another therapist. I tried to come up with ideas to help, but…they didn’t pan out.”

“Why?”

She gave me a tight smile. “No support. I got to be the scapegoat. Design a new schedule, they said. Because apparently, I knew better. Then, our load got worse, more therapists quit, and my coworkers blamed me. Anyway, that’s why I should be my own boss.”

She made it sound like that was her only choice. “You don’t want to be?”

She pivoted to face me. “Dad was coming from a good place, but he gently suggested that I gave up too early.”

“Harsh.” Poppy adored her dad. That had to be akin to being told she was a failure by a guy who’d held the same job for over half her life.

“But true.” She lifted a shoulder.

“There’s nothing wrong with wanting something better.” It sucked to be the one left behind because they weren’t enough, but Poppy hadn’t left anyone behind. Just a trail of men who didn’t deserve her.

We ate our meal, chatting about the food and different recipes, then cleaned up.

When the dishes were done and the counter wiped, I hovered by the island.

Was she going to retreat to her room for the night?

Tell me she wanted to have sex? My arousal was instant and choking, but I’d kicked the ball to her. She had to decide what to do with it.

She wandered to the front window. “It’s beautiful out. I might have a beer outside. Wanna join me?”

Abso-fucking-lutely. “Sure.”

I grabbed a couple of bottles and met her on the porch. She sprawled on the porch swing and accepted the longneck bottle. “I never dreamed of a place like this. Not since we moved.”

Her leg muscles flexed as she pushed against the porch boards to rock back and forth. I took one of the Adirondack chairs but cocked it to face her. “What did you dream of?”

“I missed our old house. I hear it has excellent new cabinets now.”

She was teasing, but that didn’t douse the spark of pride I got from working on that job and for a guy I had respected growing up. “I hear the Perez house is getting some nice ones.”

“Mm. I’ve heard the same rumor.” She took a drink. “Dad is beside himself to see the work you’re doing. He wants me to send pictures as you go.”

The young kid who lost his dad rose up inside me, ready for his approval. “He can be the first to see the portfolio.”

“You don’t mind?” She gently swung as she watched me. “My dad getting into your business?”

Her dad had to sign off on us, so no. It was smart to have him involved. But excitement to show off to him grew in my chest. “Sometimes I wish I could show my dad what I’ve done.”

She straightened from her reclining position. “Oh, Jensen.”

I waved off her concern. “I don’t mean to get serious.” It’d been a long time, but the loss was there. I missed a man I had too few memories of. “No, it’s an honor to have a dad take interest. Mom’s proud, but you know, it’s not the same. Dad was always the one out in the shop.”

“How much of your skills did you get from him?”

“Most of the basics and all of his tools.”

“I think Jasper gets dibs on Dad’s tools. If he ever moves to his own place. Terminal bachelor right there.”

“Takes us all by surprise.”

She chuckled, but then she contemplated me. “You’re not going to be a bachelor for long.”

“Another year to be a married man.” This time would be different. I knew what I was getting myself into.

“What was it like?” she asked softly. “To be married when it’s not fake.”

I held back a bitter laugh. I wasn’t sure how much of my marriage had been real. “I don’t know if I’m the one to ask. Hassie and I weren’t on the same page, and that made it harder. Mom said marriage shouldn’t be that difficult.”

“Right person, wrong time?”

I wasn’t sure about that either. The right person would have never made me feel that way. “Something like that.”

She chewed on her lower lip and stared into the distance.

Like always, I hated talking about my ex to Poppy. She was light, funny, and full of energy. The opposite of my marriage. “What would your Prince Charming be like? You know, if you were able to marry for love instead of a house.”

“The house is a really good deal, and it’s coming with awesome cabinets and some free handiwork.”

I laughed. “Got it.”

She fell quiet for a moment. “Well…I’d want what my parents have. A ride or die. Someone who always supports me. When Mom first started writing, she was told that she could never make a living off of kids’ books. I strongly suspect she outearns Dad.”

“No kidding?”

“It’d be close. She had to put in a lot of years to get there, but Dad never doubted her. He carries her business cards, not his.”

She picked at the label on the bottle, her focus too intense for a lifted corner.

“It’s the way he looks at her. Pure obsession.

Sometimes she’ll just be typing away and he’ll have this adoring look.

Then she’ll see, roll her eyes, he’ll smirk, and they go back to what they’re doing.

” She gave up on her peeling efforts. “I guess I’ve been surrounded by guys giving those adoring looks to their women, and I want it for myself.

Dad with Mom. Alder with Daisy. You with Hassie. ”

The name was a cold splash and unwelcome on this warm night with a beautiful woman. “Jesus, that was a long time ago. I wouldn’t put me and Hassie anywhere near your ideal relationship.”

“You used to stare at her all lovelorn.” She sounded only half teasing.

“Did not.” I so did. If I could go back, I’d give myself a reality check.

“Did too.” She put her beer down and gave me a starry-eyed look, then added heart hands.

I fought a smile. “Exaggerating isn’t cool, Poppy. You should watch yourself.”

She barked out her laughter. “‘I can get that for you, Hassie. What do you need? Do you want half my sandwich?’”

Not a lie was told, but I refused to let her win. “I clearly recall giving you my pudding cup.”

“Because she’s lactose intolerant.”

I spread my hands. “You still got it. Every time. And the ice cream cup.”

She put her hands in a heart shape in front of her sternum and batted her eyes. “I didn’t get this.”

I start to push myself out of my chair. “Oh, I’ll give it to you.”

“You’ll spill my beer!” She held up her hand. “Fine, fine. You win. You weren’t all heart eyes because I got the pudding cup.” She returned to rocking the swing with her toes. “You don’t like being reminded of how you were as a kid.”

My humor vanished. “No. I was over the top.” Not only had it been pointless, but I had hurt Poppy and hadn’t known it.

“We all were. I thought I was a super soccer stud.”

“You were. And you still are. Next week, you’re going to show the town what those legs can do.”

“And what can they do?” She dropped her voice, making it sound more like an invitation.

Heat sunk down low in my gut and my cock stirred. “It’s up to you to show me. Remember?”