Page 31

TWENTY-FIVE

DANIEL

But crossing off this particular item got me to thinking: as I get older and am forced to be more responsible, will I have a chance to tick off the rest of the items on my bucket list? Does growing up mean giving up the fun things in life?

For the last two weeks, the final lines of her column have been beating like a drum in my head. Just the thought of crossing that item off her bucket list has my heart pumping. It makes me irrationally happy. It’s stupid, really. Especially since she just texted, canceling on me for dinner tonight. She’s exhausted. I understand that. Obviously I told her it was fine and to rest.

She promised she was taking care of herself on the road and made sure to remind me that our next OB appointment isn’t until the end of August—when we can find out the sex of the baby if we want.

She doesn’t expect to not see me again until then, does she?

I miss her. Not the woman having my child, but Hannah herself. I miss her, and every time I think we’re taking a step in the right direction, she leaves the damn state, and it feels like we’re starting back at the beginning again.

To top that all off, Camden’s trade is official. He left for Vegas last week. It hasn’t sunken in. Not until tonight. Gavin is hosting a team dinner for the guys who are in town, and for as long as we’ve played together, Camden has always been here for these.

I survey the guys in attendance. Brooks, Aiden, and Gavin are gushing over Vivi, while War and Noah are in deep conversation about god only knows what. Keegan and I have been shooting the shit, but even that kid has a girlfriend, so when his phone rang a few minutes ago, he stepped out into the hall to talk to her.

With another look at Hannah’s text, I consider begging her to let me bring her something. Anything. But that’s pathetic. If the woman wanted to see me, she’d tell me. She never has difficulty telling me what she wants.

“Yeah, we find out next week,” War is saying as I stuff my phone into my pocket and shuffle over to where he and Noah are standing by the bar. He’s holding a small piece of paper out. One that I’ve become all too familiar with.

“That the baby?” I ask, peeking over at the sonogram picture.

“Sure is.” He grins down at the image. “He’s a handsome guy, isn’t he?”

“Thought you weren’t finding out the sex until next week?” I ask.

“Oh, we aren’t, but we’re positive it’s a boy. All the signs point to it.”

I slip my wallet out of my pocket and pull out a picture of our baby.

Noah takes it and gives it a thoughtful look. “Is that one different from the one on Hannah’s shelf?”

“I’ve got, like, six, so maybe?”

War takes it next. “It’s wild. We’re going to have babies at the same time. Ava’s thrilled about it. How’s Hannah doing now that she’s had time to process?”

Though he’s looking at me, I focus on Noah. He’s more likely to have that answer. I’m pretty sure Hannah tells him everything.

When Noah realizes I’m watching him, he’s gracious enough to respond without making it weird. “You know Hannah. She goes with the flow and makes everything her bitch. She’s handling the pregnancy like a pro.”

“Are those pictures of the babies?” Aiden appears, and then we’re surrounded by the rest of the guys, all studying our two blobs and commenting on whether they think a certain angle makes it clear the babies are boys. Leave it to a group of men to see penises in every abstract image.

In all honesty, I don’t care whether the baby is a girl or a boy, though the idea of a son causes this strange pressure in my chest. Maybe because I’m so close with my dad, or maybe because I’m just more comfortable around guys.

I couldn’t begin to guess either way. The longer the conversation goes on, the less I realize I know.

War, of course, knows precisely how his wife is carrying—high—whether she’s got heartburn—she doesn’t—and what her cravings are—salty foods.

Luckily, the guys don’t ask me. Probably because they realize I won’t have the answers. We’re just sitting down for after-dinner drinks when my sister strolls into the apartment, her cheeks flushed and her gait relaxed. The moment Vivi sees her, she squeals. “Mama! Mama!”

With their daughter in his arms, Gavin gets up and greets my sister at the door. In this moment, I know what I’m witnessing is exactly what I want. I want to be greeted by my excited child when I get home. I want to share that home with Hannah. And if I don’t figure out how to make that happen, these are the moments I’ll miss out on. Every night.

“How was your afternoon with the girls?” Gavin asks her as he ushers her inside. It may be guys’ night, but he welcomes her happily. That’s the kind of guy he is. Wherever he is, Millie and Vivi are welcome. If someone has a problem with that, they can leave. He’s a family guy, a great coach, and a genuinely good person. Thank god my sister didn’t listen to me when I told her seeing him was a bad idea.

Eyes glassy, she appraises the lot of us. “I feel like I’m tattling if I tell you.” She cups a hand to one side of her mouth, and in a loud whisper, says, “All their husbands are here.”

Noah holds up his hands and barks out a laugh. “Not married, so don’t look at me.”

She peruses the group again, this time more slowly, making eye contact with Aiden, Brooks, and War. “But they all are,” she whisper-shouts.

“Did you have a few drinks, Peaches?” Gavin murmurs.

My sister’s dark, curly hair bounces as she giggles. “Not pregnant yet, so might as well!” As the laughter dies down, she catches sight of me, and her eyes go wide. “You! You’re in trouble!”

“Why am I in trouble? Also, what do you mean not pregnant yet ? Are you guys trying?”

Gavin presses a kiss to Millie’s neck. “We’re always trying. Right, Peaches?”

I gag and have to choke back bile. Otherwise I risk puking on the guys’ shoes.

“Nope, you don’t get to change the subject.” Millie shakes her head wildly. “Hannah is sad.”

My gut plummets. “She’s what?”

“Sad. You made her sad. You are very bad.” She giggles, the sound ending with a hiccup. “That rhymes. Look at that, Aiden. I’m almost as good as you are with bad lyrics.”

“You’re a songwriter,” I grumble. “You’re better than Aiden?—”

He huffs, but before he can disagree, I shoot him a glare to shut him up. “What do you mean Hannah is sad?”

“She doesn’t know you,” she says in that tipsy voice. “She should know you, Danny. Although, I wouldn’t have slept with you”—the room erupts in a chorus of groans, but that doesn’t deter her—“but she seems to like you, so you need to fix this.”

“Fix what?” Chest tight, I look at Noah.

He only shrugs. “I have no idea what she’s talking about. Hannah seemed fine when I saw her a couple of hours ago.”

“Mills, baby. Why don’t you go take a shower?” Gavin passes Vivi to Brooks and grasps his wife by the upper arms.

I step in front of them. Hell no. I’m not done with this conversation. “What exactly did she say?”

Millie tilts her head, her face scrunched in concentration. “It was her eyes. They looked sad. She said you’re a good guy, but she doesn’t really know you.” Millie’s dark eyes—the same color as mine—bore into me, and that twin sense kicks in. That look is all it takes for me to understand exactly what she sensed when she saw Hannah.

“But how do I get her to give me the time to get to know me?”

I step back and scan the group. I need all the help I can get. I’m fucking trying, but between Hannah’s busy schedule, my reputation as nothing but a playboy, and her obvious distrust of men in general, what I’m facing is the definition of an uphill battle.

One guy after another rattles off generic advice.

Noah, on the other hand, purses his lips in concentration. “Ya know,” he says when the other guys have quieted down.

I lean forward. If he’s got an idea, then I’m all ears.

“You should take her on a have a day trip.”

Millie nods, her expression lighting up. “Oh yeah!”

My mind spins as I try to decode what they’re saying. “A what?”

“A have a day trip. It’s a thing Hannah talks about all the time. She has a fund for it,” Millie explains, like her words make perfect sense.

Noah grins. “She made me go on one when Jen got pregnant.”

Beside me, War crosses his arms. “Oliver’s mom?”

Noah nods.

“But you’re not with Oliver’s mom. So the trip obviously didn’t help.” Shoulders sagging, I drop into my chair.

“Oh, I didn’t go with Jen.” He joins me at the table. “Hannah came up with the idea when her mom got divorced the first time. She wanted to cheer her up, so she took all the money from her piggy bank, and they spent the night in a hotel. Hannah’s convinced there’s something magical about hotels.” He laughs as if hit with a memory the two of them probably share.

Dammit. I hate that I’m hearing this from him and not her.

“Anyway,” he shrugs. “She saves money, and when someone she’s close to has a breakup or a big life change, she makes sure they have a day. It doesn’t have to be fancy, but the point is to take a step back from real life and splurge a little. She sent me on one when I found out about Oliver.”

His expression turns wistful then, like he’s lost in thought.

“Alone?” Brooks asks.

Noah shakes his head like he’s forcing himself back to the present and sighs. “Yeah, I went alone.”

“Why do I get the feeling there’s more to this story?” Millie leans forward so far that if it weren’t for Gavin holding her up, she’d probably fall over.

“Okay, you sound like Beckett now,” Gavin grumbles.

“There was a girl. It was a good week.” Noah wipes the smile from his face and looks back at me. “Hannah’s got a few days off next week.”

“Oh, yes! The all-star break,” Millie squeals.

My heart thumps with anticipation, but my brain won’t stop spinning. “How will I get her to agree to go away with me, though?”

“You ask,” War says, his blue eyes more piercing than ever. “You’re Daniel Fucking Hall. You ask, and if she says no, you beg.”

Brooks chokes out a laugh. “Yeah, I have a feeling Hannah would love to see you on your knees.”

“Ew!” Millie groans and flops back against her husband.

“And with that, I’m out.” Noah stands, shaking his head. “If you get on your knees, just please don’t be loud.” He shudders.

Millie groans again. “Hannah’s the loud one.”

“Please stop.” Noah roughs a hand through his dark hair.

She giggles. “Oh, I love having someone new to taunt. Hannah’s always taunting me.”

“Okay, Peaches. We’re going to bed.” Gavin picks my sister up and heads down the hall. Over his shoulder, he calls, “Brooks, you got Vivi?”

“I got her,” he calls. Then, to me, he says, “Go get your girl.”

Back in my quiet apartment, I lie in bed and stare at the phone. It’s now or never, right?

Me: How was your bath?

Dream Girl: I would have preferred one with jets, but the warm water felt good.

Me: Hmm, so you prefer hotel rooms with jacuzzi tubs?

Dream Girl: that sounds dirty.

Dream Girl: But also, yes.

Me: lol. You up for another adventure?

Dream Girl: Tonight?

Me: No. (Though I’d gladly venture over to your apartment right now if you said yes.) I’m talking about next week. I heard you have a few days off.

Dream Girl: Yeah, for the all-star break

With a steadying breath, I type the next message, and then I go for it.

Me: Come away with me.

Dream Girl: Huh?

Me: A road trip. I’ve always wanted to go on one.

Dream Girl: You have?

Me: Yeah, what about you?

Dream Girl: It’s on my bucket list, actually.

Satisfaction courses through my veins. Bingo.

Me: That same bucket list that included sex on a baseball field?

Dream Girl: smirk emoji I can’t tell you all my secrets.

Me: If I ask, you have to share. We made a pact.

Dream Girl: Damn you and your honesty pact.

Me: LOL you don’t have to if you don’t want to.

Dream Girl: Promise you won’t tease me.

Me: Never. I love teasing you.

Dream Girl: Dammit, but I’ll share it anyway.

Me: On our road trip.

Dream Girl: What kind of music do you like?

Me: What kind of question is that?

Dream Girl: If we’re going to be in a car for hours at a time, I need to make sure we’re musically compatible.

Me: Lol, musically compatible.

Dream Girl: It’s a thing.

Me: Hannah, we’re compatible.

Dream Girl: You don’t know that. You barely know me.

My heart thuds heavily. I’m tempted to type out a list of all the things I know about her just to prove her wrong. She knows me too. Though I can’t say I don’t want to learn more. There isn’t a thing I don’t want to know about Hannah.

Me: So get to know me. Let’s go on a road trip together. You can ask me whatever you want during the trip.

Dream Girl: Whatever I want?

Me: Whatever you want. I’m an open book. Part of the honesty pact.

Dream Girl: Fine. But I control the music. And you drive.

I chuckle. Like I’d ever let her drive.

Me: Done.

Dream Girl: Seriously? Just like that.

Me: Yes, just like that.

Dream Girl: Why?

Me: You’ll understand eventually.

Dream Girl: I’m tired, and you’re talking in riddles, so I’m going to let you win this one.

Me: Okay, dream girl, get some rest.

Dream Girl: Okay.

Dream Girl: Daniel.

My chest warms. Fuck, I love when she uses my name. I can practically hear her throaty voice saying it.

Me: Yeah?

Dream Girl: I’m really excited about our trip.

Me: Me too, baby.