Page 68 of Perdition
The foundations of what made Em who she was were laid in the bedrock of her relationship with Madsen Flowers. Without him, she wouldn’t be the Emily she was—they were intertwined, their souls and lives woven together like a quilt made of starlight and heart’s blood.
And he’d taken that quilt, tore it to pieces, and tossed the scraps into the wind.
“Sarah is everything I’m not!” she screamed, her throat closing around the words, her heart beating so hard she could feel it in her neck.
Frost jerked, his whole body locking in place as a look of horror claimed his face.
His voice a haunted rasp, he croaked, “Em…baby….”
She pinched her eyes shut, the tears sliding down her cheeks dropping onto her chest.
“Not once, in all the years we’ve beenmarried, had I felt as ugly and unlovable as I did that morning when I stood there listening to Sarah basically tell you you could do better…that you had options. Why would she say that unless she was right at the top of that list? And then she came to my place of business, Frost! She came to my safe place, my sanctuary, my pride and joy, and she tainted it! She told me I was fat, worn out, not good enough to stand beside you as your old lady. She told me—to myface—that she was better than me, that she should be with you, that I should back off and leave you two to be the golden couple of the MC.”
“Fuck her! She’s full of shit, Em—” He reached for her, but she moved away, something she’d never done in all their years together, and the shock of that made Frost stumble back, asthough he’d been hit by an iron fist. “Emily,” he rasped, “you know me, you know the man I am, the man I have been since the very beginning. I have only ever loved you, only ever touched you. Sarah is a liar—and I don’t know why she’s doing all this!”
“Maybe because you made her think that you and she had a chance, that there would be something between you two if only I wasn’t in the way.”
Frost reached for her again, his hand stalling midair, uncertainty and anguish on his weary face.
“I didn’t mean for any of that, baby. I know I did some shitty things, and I am so fucking sorry that I let things get this bad between us, that I let her get in between us—but I never meant for any of this to happen.”
God, the desperate sincerity in his voice and the pleading in his eyes tore at something inside her she was equally as desperate to hold in place.
Because what if she let him back in and nothing had changed? Sure, Sarah might get the boot, but what about the next young pretty thing that bats her eyelashes and feeds his need for relevance or pricks his need to protect and provide?
“Sarah means nothing to me, and what she did…fuck…makes me sick, Em.” He cursed, the sound sharp. “She had no fucking right to pull any of the shit she’s been pulling.”
“Maybe you should have thought of that before you told her she was too young too settle down, and that she’d get stuck. She probably thought you were angling to be the one she settled with.”
Frost snarled, flashing his canines. “I only said that because she’s an immature bitch who’d make a terrible girlfriend. She doesn’t have it in her to commit to anyone, but I didn’t want to hurt her feelings by straight out saying she wasn’t girlfriend material.”
Em huffed, hating how that made sense.
“What about you agreeing when she said you had options?”
Frost pinched the bridge of his nose, and sighed. “I didn’t agree, I didn’t say anything. I made the appropriate noise in the hopes that she would move the fuck on.”
Hell, Vicki and Stephie had been right.
Her husband was an idiot.
“I never meant to hurt you, Em. I never meant for anything to happen, especially with Sarah.”
She furrowed her brows at his words, suddenly wondering what else Sarah had been pulling that Em didn’t know about.
Trouble at the clubhouse?
She really should ask Stephie and Cilla; those two ladies were the most in the know about what was going on with the Unchained club gossip.
That should be you! You should be there, in the know, not thinking like an outsider you’ve made yourself to be.
Nope. She wasn’t going there. Not now.
“I am well aware that you didn’t mean for anything to happen, Frost. My issue is that the only reason Sarah had the balls to approach me like that, to get in my face like that, was becauseyouwere complacent. You let her believe that what she was saying was gospel truth, that she could call me out, talk to me like that, and you wouldn’t do jack about it because I was on my way out, she was on her way in, and you were just being nice, not having kicked me to the curb yet. She came at me like she did because she felt like she had you at her back.”
Emily swiped at her tears, her movements rough.
“And do you know why she felt like that? Like she had the fucking right?”