Page 18 of Panther’s Magpie (Mountain River MC #1)

CHAPTER

SEVENTEEN

MAGGIE

I t feels weird being in Panther’s house without him, but at the same time, it feels kind of right. It’s a beautiful place. I can tell it was made with attention to detail in mind. It totally has a wood cabin feel, but it’s also homey.

The only thing missing is decorations. Sure, he has a couch and recliner along with a table that looks like it’s seen better days, but there is no personality in the place beyond the workmanship it took to build it.

That makes me sad when I look at it. There aren’t pictures of him and Aspen around, nor are there pictures of him with his brothers. It’s depressing.

Maybe I’m thinking too much about it. Maybe he prefers it this way.

Still, as I wander around his home, it reminds me of the one I grew up in. A big, opulent home with no signs of life beyond the occasional unmade bed or dirty dish in the sink. I know many of the maids and other workers in the home spent more time inside the walls than my own parents did.

Maybe that’s why this place feels so empty to me. I grew up without pictures on the walls. I don’t even have any photos of me as a baby or child. Nothing to mark my growing up and moving onto another stage of life. Even my graduation was overshadowed by yet another trip to Milan.

I should be grateful. They never hit me. I always had food, clothes, and a roof over my head. Yet in some ways, I feel like my abuse was worse. At least if they hit me, I would invoke some kind of emotion in them. They would know I exist.

Instead, my parents practically forgot about me. Like some pet left at home when they went on vacation.

That’s not true. Fluffy, my mother’s dog when I was growing up, was allowed to go on vacation with them. He sat proudly in her little purse in every photo.

My heart aches at the memory. At the loneliness.

Not wanting to dwell on it, I decide I will make this place a little more like home for Panther. Nothing major, but something that will make it feel a little more lived in.

Picking up my phone, I smile when I see it’s charged. I didn’t even notice him putting it on the charger last night.

I dial Rain, waiting for her to answer.

“Hey girl. What’s up?”

I smile. “Are you busy right now?”

“Not really. Why? Are you breaking out of your jail?” she asks, sounding too excited.

“No. I don’t want to go against what Panther says. If he thinks it’s not safe out there for me, then I would rather stay here.”

“Ooh. Doing what the big bad biker says now, huh? It’s okay. I’ll forgive you for not being a badass bitch,” she teases.

“Hey,” I protest.

“Kidding. What do you need help with?” she asks.

“Can you stop by a store and grab me a few things? I’ll pay you back,” I tell her.

“Sure. Whatcha need?”

I love how willing she is to do what I ask without question. It makes me feel like I may have found another friend.

“Three throw pillows. Two white, one navy blue.” I look around the living room some more. “A throw blanket that is fuzzy and a cream color, I think.” I think about Panther’s large stature. “Make it extra large. Oh, and some candles. I’m thinking nature-smelling, like freshly cut pine or something.”

“That is all oddly specific. I am intrigued. Anything else?”

I walk into the kitchen, looking into the fridge. “If I text you a grocery list, can you pick that up too?”

“Of course. I can be there in like two hours, including the stops,” she tells me.

“Wait, can you, um, bring it to Panther’s house? Do you know where that is?”

“Excuse me, bitch says what? Are you in Panther’s house as we speak? Way to bury the fucking lead.”

I wince. I don’t know if he wants people to know I’m here. Honestly, I wondered if he brought all his dates back here before. Maybe that’s what I’m coming off as. Some girl who slept with Panther. Am I doing too much?

“You know what. This is a bad idea. Forget it,” I hurry to say.

“No. You don’t get to do that. If you are in his home, I assume he allowed you there. Correct?”

I frown. “Yeah. I mean, I had a nightmare last night and called him. He brought me here.”

“Oh, this is so good. Trust me. This is a great idea. Stay there. Go take a bath in that ridiculous claw tub he has. I’ll be there soon.”

She hangs up before I can complain.

I do as she says, going to run myself a bath.

He has no kind of bath salts or bubble bath, so I resort to using his body wash for some sort of bubbles.

When I inhale, I get the zesty cypress, oud wood, and warm sandalwood the label promises.

It reminds me of Panther. Woodsy. It reminds me of the outdoors.

I let my body slip beneath the warm water, letting it caress my skin. I pretend it’s Panther’s fingers on my body.

It doesn’t take me long to find myself lost in a fantasy of him. I’ve been trying to keep them at bay, but it’s like his kiss this morning gave me the permission I’ve been searching for to give in to these intense feelings I have been having about him.

It feels so wrong to betray Aspen this way, but at the same time, he feels right. He feels like what I have been searching for my whole life.

He feels like home.

My core heats at thoughts of him. The way his body glistened in the moonlight as he carried me from the clubhouse to his own home. The feel of his body against mine as he held me, creating the safety I have always craved.

Quickly my fingers find their way between my legs. They explore as if I’ve never felt myself before, even though I have many times. I pretend they are him. He’s learning my body so he can please me.

It doesn’t take long for my moans to ring out in the empty bathroom. They echo off the walls as I find my pleasure with my mind on Panther.

I thought it would make me feel better, but it only makes me hotter for him. It’s like craving a vanilla shake all day, but all they have is chocolate. Still satisfying, but doesn’t get rid of the need for the real thing.

Cleaning up, I find one of his T-shirts to slip on and a pair of boxers. I don’t know if he will let me stay past today, but I have no idea how to get back to the clubhouse from here. I could ask Rain, but part of me wants to stay here. I want to be in his space.

I wait in the living room for Rain, wondering what Panther does for fun since he doesn’t have a TV. I could do some snooping, but I don’t want to betray his trust like that.

After what seems like forever, Rain finally arrives.

“Wearing his clothes. I like it. Very territorial of you.”

“Rain! I don’t have any clothes here, and it’s not like he left me a map to get back to the clubhouse. I don’t even have any shoes.”

She smiles wider. “Well, you know, if you just go through the woods, you could find it. Want me to tell you exactly how?”

I shake my head. “Plausible deniability?”

She laughs. “He is going to wonder how you got this stuff here, you know. What do you plan to tell him?”

I frown. “I hadn’t thought of that. Maybe I’ll just tell him I thought he wanted me to wait here? He did tell me I could hang here until he got back if I wanted.”

“There you go. Stop questioning yourself. Men aren’t like women. There’s no hidden meaning to what he says. If he said you could stay, then you can stay. Now help me put these groceries away and tell me everything.”

I help her take the bags to the kitchen and start to put everything away.

“There’s not much to tell. I get nightmares sometimes.

Aspen is usually the one who helps me through them, but, well, I didn’t know what to do, so I called him.

I didn’t expect him to come. I just needed someone to talk me down.

Then he said he didn’t want to leave me alone, so he literally picked me up and carried me over here. ”

I bite my lower lip, not sure if I should tell her about the kiss.

“You could have called me. Are you okay? Do you want to talk about it?”

I shake my head. “It was a stupid nightmare that I’m sure is fueled by my own insecurities. Or at least that’s what the internet says. I almost did call you, by the way.”

“You called him, though.”

“I did. I don’t know why. I think he represents safety for me. Does that sound stupid?”

“Not at all. He is a strong and capable man. He is safe for you. He would protect you. Those are good traits to have in a man.”

I lean against the counter, contemplating what I want to do. Part of me really wants to tell her. If Aspen were here, I would have already spilled the deets with her. I don’t know Rain that well, though, and well, Aspen probably wouldn’t want to hear about me having the hots for her brother.

“I can feel you staring at me,” she says as she shuts the fridge, giving me her full attention. “What else happened?”

“What? How do you know anything happened?”

“You have that guilty look on your face like you got caught with your hand in the cookie jar.”

I sigh. “We kissed this morning. It was pretty hot and heavy. Then he got a call and told me I could stay here. He probably kisses lots of girls, though, right? It probably meant nothing. I mean, I’m not special.”

She snorts. “Sure, Panther has kissed plenty of girls. I’m not going to lie to you.”

My stomach sours at her words. I mean, I knew it, but I didn’t need the confirmation. I would have rather lived in my fantasy world.

She doesn’t notice my peril and continues on. “However, he doesn’t bring girls here. This is his home. Trust me, it’s special that you are here.”

“Well, you know where he lives, so you must have been here.”

She laughs. “No. Not even once. I only know where he lives because everyone on the compound does. You want to act like this doesn’t mean anything, but it does. It means a lot.”

I sit there reeling from her words.

Could they be true?

Could Panther really feel the way I do?

PANTHER

I hated leaving Maggie at the house, but no matter how badly I wanted to keep her in my arms, I had to go. Club business will always come up, and it’s my job as president to handle it when it does.

Doesn’t mean I have to like it.