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“When were you going to tell me?” Julian shouts. “Damn it, Mom!”
“I thought you knew!”
“That you fucked him? Yeah, I knew that. Hell, everyone knew that. You two eyefuck each other every time you’re in the same place. What I didn’t know was that he might be…”
He stops himself and lowers his voice enough that Sean and I can’t hear him from the living room. Actually, he’s probably more concerned with his children upstairs than with the two of us.
It doesn’t matter. I know what he’s going to say. He might be my father.
“What should I have done? They didn’t have DNA tests back in the eighties. Should I have told your father—”
“Which one? The one you married, or the one you opened your legs for when the one you married wasn’t looking?”
“That’s not fair , Julian!”
She’s weeping now. Her sobs echo through her words.
“The hell it isn’t!” he shouts. “I could be a bastard, and you never had the courtesy to tell me!”
"You don't know what it was like!" she shrieks. "I was twenty-three years old, and my life was over ! I wasn’t Victoria anymore, I was Parker’s wife. I was the ‘lucky girl’ who snatched up the heir to the Bellamy wine empire. It didn’t matter that I had an MBA when most people were finishing their bachelor's degree or that it was my idea to partner with Picard wines in Bologne and open up the European market. I was the damned trophy wife!”
“So you became the trophy whore?”
“That’s not fair !”
“No, you know what’s not fair? Telling Dad you loved him then writing in your diary about how much better Robert was in bed?”
There’s a moment of shocked silence. Sean and I share a look. He appears just as miserable hearing this as I feel.
“Yeah. That’s right. I read the diary. The police wanted to know if I was aware of what it said. I wasn’t, but I sure am now. And hey, good for you. Every girl deserves the best sex she can get right? Even if it means fathering a bastard child and making your cuckold husband raise it. I hope it was good enough, Mom. I really do.”
Victoria mutters something through her sobs, and Julian says, “Don’t blame Mary for this. She’s trying to protect Nathan and Luann. If she wasn’t here, Robert might have caught her with Kevin and taken his anger out on her instead of me. Think about that for a bit, Mom. Think about Robert catching Luann with Kevin and deciding to punish her for the fact that you used him.”
“He used me , Julian! He used me ! We were going to…”
She cuts herself off, but not in time. “Going to what, Mom? Run away together? Abandon your marriages and your businesses and sail away across the sea where you could live in bed forever?”
“It wasn’t just the sex, Julian. Stop fixating on that. I loved him. He was… You don’t understand.”
“So help me understand. What was it? Was he more handsome? Was he going to tell everyone how much smarter you were than he was? Was he going to let you run the business while he—”
“He was a man, Julian. He was a man . Parker was sweet, and he was kind, and he was tender, but he wasn’t strong. If I hadn’t stood with him, this company would have folded forty years ago. Robert is strong. He built his business, and he ran it with authority and assertiveness. Parker would have wilted if a secretary yelled at him.”
“Is that why the Cartwrights are a failing winery, and we’re the most successful wine business in New England?”
“ I’m the reason we're successful! Me! I ran the fucking company, not your father. And you should know that because you worked for me for twenty years before you took over."
“Well, great job, Mom. Thank you for sacrificing the love of your life to help my poor dad. Or is he my dad? We’ll never know. Actually, we will know. I’m going to find out for sure. And if I find out that Roger Cartwright is my father, the children and I are going to leave. We’ll never see you again. Honestly, I should get a restraining order against you anyway after you assaulted Luann last night.”
“She… I didn’t… The vineyard is destroyed because of her!”
“The vineyard is destroyed because of you, Mom. You and your asshole boyfriend. And for God’s sake, Mom, it’s a forty-acre plot in your backyard. It’s a foolish vanity project that I allowed you to have because you’re my mother.”
“It’s our legacy!”
“It’s your legacy, Mom. Except it isn’t. Your legacy is betrayal and selfishness.”
The door to the great room slams open. Julian’s footsteps echo through the house as he storms up the stairs. I take a deep breath and grip Sean’s hand. A moment later, the door to the living room opens. Victoria Cartwright stands in the doorway and looks at me with naked hate. It reminds me disturbingly of the hate in Luann Cartwright’s eyes last night.
“You’re fired,” she hisses. “Get out of my house.”
"No, she's not!" Julian calls down the stairs. "I don't want you alone with the children."
Victoria grabs two fistfuls of her hair and releases a sob of frustration. “God damn it, Julian, I…” She throws her hands in the air. “Fine. Do whatever you want. My feelings don’t matter at all.”
“Not anymore,” Julian calls down.
“No, you’re right. Forget about me. I’m just an old whore.”
She slams the door behind her. A moment later, I heard the front door slam shut, too. Sean and I remain where we are for a long while. Eventually, Sean says, "I should go."
“Please don’t,” I whisper. “I don’t want to be alone here.”
“ We should go,” he corrects. “We’ll get a room in town, and we’ll cooperate with the police until this investigation is over. Then we’ll go back to Boston. I know you tried, but this is out of our hands now.”
The door opens before I can reply. Julian stands where his mother stood a few minutes ago. He looks miserable.
“Mary, I understand if this situation is too uncomfortable for you, but I would really appreciate it if you and Sean could stay for a few more days. I’ll pay double your salary, but I don’t want the children to be alone with my mother right now, and I don’t have anywhere else I can take them. I don’t want them alone in a hotel room, and I can’t stay because I have to keep this from becoming yet another media clusterfuck, pardon my language, and I have to handle it. Once things calm down, I’ll take the children with me to the mainland, and my mother can deal with her own problems, but right now… just for their sake, can you stay.”
I nod. “Yes. Of course I will.”
Sean doesn’t look pleased to hear that, but he also nods. “We’ll keep them company, sir.”
"Thank you. I'll pay you as well, Sean. I just can't deal with all of the bullshit at once." He turns to leave but pauses at the doorway. "How long have you known, Mary?"
“Known what?”
“About Robert Cartwright and my mother? How long?”
I swallow. “I… I read the diary a couple of weeks ago.”
He chuckles bitterly. “Well, it’s not your shit to wade through. I guess I can’t blame you for not telling me. Do me a favor and don’t tell the kids yet, okay? I’ll handle that when the time comes.”
“I won’t,” I promise him. “I’m so sorry, Julian.”
“Doesn’t really matter.”
The door closes behind him, and I sink onto the couch cushion. Sean sits next to me, but he offers no words of comfort. There’s really nothing to say.
***
The family is together for dinner that night. I’m somewhat surprised by that, and not very happy with the choice. I suggest to Julian that Sean and I should take the children somewhere else for dinner, and he very firmly replies, “If my mother’s uncomfortable having dinner with her family, then she’s welcome to leave.”
Sean’s lips thin, but he refrains from speaking. Victoria sits primly in her chair, eating her salad with dignity that I’m sure she doesn’t feel. Nathan and Luann sit on the opposite end of the table, a gap of two chairs in between Julian and I. Sean sits in between me and Victoria.
Beatrice quietly serves the meal, a simple one of roast beef, peas and mashed potatoes. The men and Victoria eat in silence. I manage a few bites out of politeness, but my stomach turns too much for me to finish. The children don’t eat at all. Luann keeps her eyes on her plate. Tear tracks stain her cheeks, and her shoulders slump in dejection. Nathan, on the other hand, sits ramrod straight in his chair. He stares hatefully at his grandmother, who ignores his look and continues to eat her meal.
Beatrice brings dessert out a half hour later. She clears the empty plates and the nearly full ones without a word.
Dessert is ice cream sundaes. Once more, I manage a few bites out of politeness, and Victoria and the men finish theirs, more out of stubbornness than anything else, I believe. The children let theirs melt.
For a while, anyway. As Victoria finishes the last of her meal, she says cattily, "Hate me if you'd like Nathan. One day, you'll be a man. When you are, I suggest that you not treat your wife as property. Then you won't have to deal with her looking elsewhere."
Julian snaps his eyes up to her. “Mom, shut the—”
He doesn’t finish his sentence. Nathan lifts his ice cream dish and sends the dessert hurling across the table. It strikes Victoria’s face, splattering on her forehead and trickling down over her nose and cheeks. She doesn’t so much as flinch.
“I hope you die alone, you old bitch.”
“Nathan, that’s enough!” I snap. “Go to your room!”
Both of the children leave. Luann keeps her head on the floor, but I notice that she takes Nathan’s hand when they exit the room. I suppose it’s a silver lining that the two of them have each other to cling to.
Beatrice enters the dining room and gasps when she sees Victoria. Victoria wipes her face with her napkin, as dignified as before. Then she stands. “Thank you for the meal, Beatrice. It was lovely.”
She leaves the dining room then. The rest of us remain for a few more seconds before Sean nudges me. “We should go upstairs, Mary.”
Julian leaves with us. He doesn’t say a word to us as he stalks up the stairs and heads to his own room. Sean and I peek our heads into Nathan’s room and find Luann weeping on her brother’s shoulder. He glares at us until we close the door.
We head to my room and sit on the bed. I’m exhausted, but I don’t expect to sleep until Sean lays me gently down on the bed. Then, mercifully, the day is over.