Page 42 of On Thin Ice (Calgary Mounties #1)
Chapter Forty
NEVER NEEDED ME
Adele
The last six days have been some of the worst in my life. Even after breaking up with the man I’d agreed to marry, I’d kept myself together.
But the first four days after Lincoln smashed my heart to pieces, I could barely get out of bed, surrounded by a sea of tissues.
On the fifth day, anger had replaced the sadness, and I’d spent the day scrubbing every surface of my apartment while listening to loud rap music, which I’m sure my neighbours were just thrilled about.
On the sixth day, I’d allowed Kylie to enter my fortress of solitude, where she did her best not to mention ‘he who must not be named’ but did let slip that he was meeting with management after finding out who had leaked the video to the media.
I hadn’t been even the slightest bit surprised when she told me it had been Alistair.
Sarah had apparently gotten someone in the IT department to do some sleuthing, handing the evidence to Mikayla on the proviso that her name was left out of it.
She probably could have lost her job for not taking it to management first, but she didn’t trust them to do the right thing by Lincoln.
As far as she’s concerned, the players are hers to protect, and she wanted to make sure Alistair got what he deserved for messing with one of her boys.
Now, on the seventh day, I can no longer hide from the world anymore, as Dad has informed me that I need to get my butt back to work.
“There she is,” Dad says as I push the door open and slouch into the office.
“Yay me,” I reply, not even remotely in the mood for his chipper tone.
I’ve put very minimal effort into my appearance, and I’m sure that my eyes are still bloodshot after crying non-stop for a week.
If I thought I could get away with it, I’d still be in my sweats and Mounties jersey.
The one with Seth’s last name on it, though.
Because no way am I wearing Lincoln’s name on my back anymore.
Even though the giant asshole owns my heart, despite the way he smashed it apart.
“You doing okay, sis?” Jordan asks.
I stop in my tracks, running a disbelieving eye over my brother. “I’m fine… Are you broken? You have literally never given a crap about my feelings before now.”
He raises both eyebrows. “That’s not true.”
I cross my arms. “Name a single time when you’ve asked me that before now.”
He thinks for a moment, sitting back in his desk chair and tapping his lip with his finger. “I asked you when you were six and you were crying because you scraped your knee.” He gives me a cheeky grin, and I roll my eyes.
“Not doing a great job at selling the caring brother act there, just so you know.”
He sobers, sighing. “I care, Addie. You’ve just never needed me, so I haven’t had to show it. ”
Dad watches us both, keeping quiet while we survey each other.
“What do you mean? Of course I needed you - you’re my big brother.”
He shakes his head. “Addie, you came out of the womb independent. You didn’t need me looking out for you. And I’ve always admired you for that. But I’ve never seen you take a break-up this badly. So, I’ll ask again - are you okay?”
I feel my shoulders drop a little as my defences lower. “Not really. But I’ll get over it. Not like I get much of a choice, apparently.” My words are bitter, but I don’t have it in me to care.
The way that Lincoln chose to walk away without allowing me to have a say in the matter has been playing over and over in my mind.
While he never said the words, I know he loves me.
His actions before that awful afternoon made it impossible to deny.
So, the fact that he broke up with me instead of accepting the love I was offering tells me that he has issues he needs to deal with. And I can’t help him with that.
All I can do is move forward and hope that I can find a way to exist in a world where I no longer get to touch him. To run my fingers through his soft blond hair. To kiss those way too kissable lips…
Nope, not going there.
“Here’s your pack for today. It should be a good group. You’ve got a group of ten ladies from Australia who have known each other for decades and are now on their dream holiday to Canada. As well as a few other solo travellers.”
I shake my head, taking the trip pack that Dad holds out to me. “You really do love the oldies, don’t you Dad?”
He shrugs. “What can I say, they’ve always been the most fun.”
I muster up a smile, sliding the packet into my bag.
“Simon has already collected them from the hotel, so you’ll be heading off once he picks you up in a few minutes,” Mum says, coming in from the break room with Kylie in tow.
“Oh… Why?” I ask, confused.
Simon has never picked up a tour group without me before, and I can’t think of a single reason why that has changed now.
“He was okay to handle it. He should be here any minute, so off you go.” Mum waves her hand towards the door, and I can’t help but notice that they are all acting really weird.
Kylie flashes me a grin, bouncing on the balls of her feet, and I decide it’s best to leave before I end up entering the twilight zone with all of them.
Wheeling my suitcase behind me, I walk out to the road just as Simon rounds the corner in the bus. I look down at my watch, noting that he’s a few minutes early, while giving myself an internal pep talk to put on my sunniest smile and pretend like I’m completely fine.
The bus pulls up and I climb the stairs, sliding my suitcase into the seat behind Simon and giving his shoulder a squeeze.
“Morning Miss Addie,” he says, nodding.
“Morning, Simon.” I turn to face the passenger seats, taking in all the smiling faces. “Hi everyone, I’m Adele, and I’ll be your guide for the next three days, while we see Lake Louise and Banff.”
My words are met with a chorus of “Hi Adele!” and it’s hard to feel sad when so many people seem to be happy to see you.
Normally I’d introduce myself to each person at pick up, but as things are all topsy-turvy today, I simply take a seat and buckle my seat belt before gripping the microphone in my hand and bringing it to my lips.
“So, I hear a few of you are on your dream trip to Canada?”
“Us!” A few voices call out in thick Australian accents, followed by some laughter from the group towards the back .
“How are you liking it so far?” I ask, trying to twist in my seat to see them, but it’s hard when I’m buckled in.
One of them answers for the group. “Oh, it’s been lovely! We went to Vancouver for a few days before we went to Whistler… But there were more Australians there than back home, so we’re happy to be here now.”
I laugh. “Yeah, the Aussies do love Whistler. And how long have you been in Calgary?”
Another voice answers, although I can’t see who it is. “Two days. And it’s been such fun. We even got to meet one of your famous hockey players!”
I pause for a moment, before taking a breath, hoping my voice doesn’t waiver. “Oh yes, and who was that?”
“This famous hockey player,” a much younger, much more masculine voice answers, and I freeze.
Great, now I’m hallucinating .
Because there is absolutely no way that Lincoln is on this bus.
I unbuckle my seatbelt and stand up, turning to look towards the back of the bus, staring into the eyes of the man that I’ve spent the past six days alternating between loving and hating in equal measure.
He’s sitting amongst a group of women in their late sixties, all of whom are staring at him with hearts in their eyes.
“And what is this famous hockey player doing on this bus?” I ask, staring him down.
He flashes me that charming smile, the one that makes my insides melt, but I refuse to let it charm me this time.
“Well, it started with a girl,” he says, like he’s settling in for story time.
But I’m not ready to hear it. “Sounds like a terrible story,” I say, narrowing my eyes .
“Oh, it sounded terribly romantic when he was telling us all about it. You should really let him finish, Adele.”
I turn to glare at Simon. “That’s enough out of you, traitor.”
He shakes his head, and I note the twinkle in his eye when he chances a glance my way before turning back to the road. “Not a traitor. I just picked up the paying customers. Not my fault one of them was a hopelessly romantic Mounties player.”
I groan. “He signed your jersey, didn’t he?”
“Yes, ma’am.”
I shake my head again and turn back to Lincoln, who continues to grin at me. He is very clearly proud of his little subterfuge, which I’m now certain my family was in on as well. But I’m not going to be letting him off the hook that easily.
“We will continue this conversation later, O’Malley. Everyone else, I hope you enjoy the drive as we wind through the Rocky Mountains. We should arrive at Lake Louise in two hours.”
With that, I turn and plonk down in my seat, ignoring the mutterings of the people behind me and quietly stew over this sudden turn of events, while telling my hopeful heart to be quiet.