Page 40 of On Thin Ice (Calgary Mounties #1)
Chapter Thirty-Eight
WE WERE KIDDING OURSELVES
Adele
“Did you know about the video? Care to give your side?”
Having a microphone shoved in my face is the last thing I expected when I stepped outside this morning to take Milo for a walk.
Lincoln has been holed up in my apartment for the last two days, ever since the reporters showed up at his building and started hounding him day and night for an exclusive interview.
We figured he’d be safe here, as no one really knows who I am or where I live.
I guess they’ve worked it out.
“How about this for a quote – go away and leave us alone,” I say, shoving the microphone out of my face before turning and heading back inside.
Sighing, I look down at Milo. “Sorry buddy, guess we’re hanging out inside with Daddy today.”
Milo gives me a mournful look, before turning to look back at the door, most likely confused about why I took him outside only to snatch a walk away from under his nose.
Catching the lift back upstairs, I let myself into my apartment to see Lincoln in the same spot I left him - on the couch, his phone pressed to his ear while he tries to work out how to navigate through this mess with his agent and the team lawyers.
They’ve been working around the clock to try and work out who released the video to the media.
It had shown more than the one that had previously been released, although I haven’t watched it.
I don’t need to see my boyfriend being intimate with others, even if it occurred before we were together.
The whole thing makes my blood boil, as anger at the position Lincoln has been put in courses through me.
I had to get my dad to cover my current tour group, as I haven’t wanted to leave Lincoln alone, and now that it appears I’ve been drawn into the drama, it might be best I sit out the next few.
The last thing our family business needs is to have reporters showing up while I’m leading a group around.
Lincoln raises an eyebrow when I walk through the door, moving the phone away from his mouth. “That was quick?”
I grimace, nodding towards the window. “Yeah, there were reporters outside,” I say, and his eyebrows fly upwards.
“What? How?” He jumps up, keeping the phone to his ear as he stalks towards the window, looking down at the street. “Fuck.”
Someone on the phone must ask him what’s wrong, because he shakes his head, sighing.
“Not you guys. Reporters have just shown up at my girlfriend's building. I’ll call you back.” He hangs up and throws the phone across the room.
“Fuck it all to hell!” He links his hands behind his neck and stares up at the ceiling.
In all the years I’ve known Lincoln, I’ve never once seen him this angry, and I’d be scared if I didn’t know him so well.
The past few days have drained him, and he’s barely slept.
The team benched him, claiming it was just until they could work out how the video got out there and how best to deal with it, but that’s just made it all so much worse for him.
For months, he’s worked so hard to stay on management’s good side, and it had been working.
If we hadn’t thought it was someone with a personal vendetta against him before, we definitely know it is now.
There is no way he wasn’t the target, as Declan had already lost his job months back when the first video was released, and Elena didn’t have an employer to start with.
But Lincoln was the one with the biggest profile involved in the video, and now it’s coming back to haunt him, big time.
Not for the first time, I wish he’d not given them permission to film the encounter.
Not because I’m ashamed of what he did, but because I can see how much it’s hurting him now.
He is one of the best players in the league, and very popular with the fans, so to have his career put at risk because of something that happened in his personal life is beyond frustrating.
I bend to unclip Milo’s lead, placing it on the table before walking to stand in front of Lincoln.
“Hey. It’s fine. I just won’t go out the front door.
Maybe we can go hole up at Seth and Kylie’s for the next few days, until the reporters find something else to interest them.
” I place a hand on his chest, and he lowers his gaze from the ceiling to meet mine, the muscle in his jaw tense as he studies me.
“I should leave. If they know I’m gone, they’ll leave you alone.”
I shake my head. “I doubt it. They were asking me about how I feel about everything, so they are sniffing around for drama.”
He scrubs a hand over his face, closing his eyes. “This is a fucking nightmare.”
I can’t argue with him on that one, so I simply slide my hand up to clasp the back of his neck, massaging a little to try and bring him back to me.
“It’ll pass, babe. What are the lawyers saying?”
He sighs again, shrugging. “They are working to try and work out where the video came from. Mikayla is fuming because it looks like it’s someone that works with the team who did it, from what they can tell.
So now she’s telling them all she’s done negotiating and is going to look for a team that actually looks after their players.
I’m basically screwed.” The air of defeat around him is hard to watch.
I squeeze the back of his neck again. “We’ll work this out. I’m sure she’s just bluffing to make it seem like you guys are the ones holding all the cards.”
He laughs, but it’s hollow and devoid of any emotion. “We definitely don’t hold any cards. There’s no way they are going to resign me now. It doesn’t matter what I do, I’m basically done. No other team is going to want to take a chance on me after all of this.”
Anger rises within me once more. “No, fuck that. I’m sorry, but you are not in the wrong here.
They should be protecting you, not leaving you to deal with this shit on your own with the reporters banging on your door.
You didn’t ask for that video to be released.
You jumped through the hoops they set in your way at the beginning of the season, and you’ve been playing your ass off for them. ”
His expression softens slightly, and he cups my cheek. “My little protector.”
“Damn straight. And if you do have to move teams, you won’t be going alone.” The words trip off my tongue before I have a chance to think about it.
His eyes widen. “What do you mean?”
I take a deep breath, watching as various emotions flit across his expression. “If you do get traded… I’m going with you.”
He steps back, shaking his head. “I can’t ask you to do that, Addie. Your whole life is here.”
I shrug. “So? It’s not like they really need me at work. If I have to choose, I choose you. ”
He scans my face, and the longer he stands there, not speaking, I realize I should have kept my mouth shut.
“Addie… You can’t give everything up for me.”
My heart stutters, and the look on his face - complete and utter devastation - has me rubbing the spot on my chest, as though I could ease the pain.
“I wouldn’t be giving things up for you. I’d be choosing to be with you, because I-” I stop talking, so close to admitting just how deep my feelings have gone for him.
But something about the way he’s shaking his head and moving away from me stops me from putting all my cards on the table.
“Don’t… Don’t say it. We both know you don’t mean that, and I can’t be responsible for fucking up your life, too.”
I stare at him, unable to process what he’s saying. “Since when is it up to you to tell me what I mean? You think I’m not capable of knowing my own feelings?”
“I think we moved so fast that it’s easy to mistake what you’re feeling for something else.” He runs a hand through his hair. “Look… I think I should go.”
My mouth falls open. “What?” It comes out as little more than a whisper.
He looks up at the ceiling again, swallowing hard. “I just… I think we need to take a step back.”
I sway a little and grasp the back of the chair next to me to keep myself steady. “So basically, things get a little rough and you bail? Is that it?” I try to keep the hurt from my voice and focus on the anger.
He looks at me again, his shoulders dropping. “I never should have pulled you into all of this.”
I cross my arms. “That’s such bullshit, Lincoln. I’m a grown woman and have been responsible for every decision I’ve made ever since this started. ”
He shakes his head. “If I hadn’t fucked up so royally, this never would have happened, and you know it. We were kidding ourselves that this would work, and now you’re just going to get hurt. I can’t… I can’t handle being the one to hurt you, Addie.”
I grit my teeth, willing the tears threatening to fall to stay hidden. “Too late, Linc. You just did.”
He drops his head, looking down at his feet, and I know this is it. This is the end. And I have no choice but to let him walk away.
Even as I feel my heart shatter into a thousand pieces.