Page 38 of On the Land, We Shoot Straight

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hat night, Grady lay in bed, staring up at the ceiling, the fire from downstairs burning bright enough to cast bursts of light and shadow on the hallway wall upstairs, the murmur of the lambs settling in for the night drifting up to him.

He brought his arm up and rested his head on his forearm, and found his mind racing even though it’d been a long day, a cold day.

His body was tired in the way it got when you were cold and filthy and then clean and warm, in the way you felt when you’d done your work and it was time to be resting in clean sheets.

But his mind wasn’t resting. It was so loud in his thoughts, he didn’t even hear Cole come in. He felt him, though, when he was crawling in beside him and stretching out lengthways along Grady’s side. Grady brought his arm down and pulled him close.

“You ain’t sleepin’ with your lambs?”

Cole shook his head and pressed his face into Grady’s side so his lips brushed the skin as he spoke. “Nah, they all good.”

Cole started to make a path up Grady’s ribs with his lips, soft kisses that lingered and felt good. Grady moved his hand up and down Cole’s back in response, smooth sweeps that brushed the curve of his ass before sweeping up to trace his shoulder blades.

Cole lifted his head and rested his chin on Grady’s pectoral. Grady could make out his face all right, his eyes getting that determined look, but he seemed scared now too.

“Can I try something?” Cole asked.

“Yeah…”

“It’ll feel good.”

Grady tucked Cole closer into his side.

“It ain’t feelin’ good for me I’m worried about.”

“You worry?”

Grady blew out a breath. “Yeah, I worry.”

Cole pressed his face against Grady’s chest.

“Well, you don’t gotta worry about this,” Cole said into his skin. Then he looked up and met Grady’s eyes. “Just don’t move, okay?”

“Okay.”

Grady stayed still as Cole slid the blanket off him and straddled his waist. He used his hands to brace himself against Grady’s bare chest and kept his face down, his breaths already going short and fast. Grady felt his dick responding when Cole shuffled down, the length of it brushing up against Cole’s ass; he worried it’d upset him and didn’t know what to do about it.

Cole wasn’t looking at him though, he was focusing hard on Grady’s chest. He shimmied down so he had his ass planted on Grady’s dick where it was thickening and pressing between his crack.

Cole gasped, rocked down but it didn’t just sound turned on; it sounded frightened too.

“You sure…”

Cole nodded fast.

“Look at me,” Grady said.

Cole glanced up and met his eyes.

“Just us here,” Grady said. “And I ain’t lookin’ for anything.”

Cole nodded, but ground his ass onto Grady’s dick. And Grady couldn’t help pushing into that.

“Think you are.”

Grady shook his head. “Can’t blame a man for havin’ a response, but I don’t need anythin’.”

Cole nodded again. “But I do.”

He remained completely still as Cole worked his pants down and off, his fingers brushing over Grady’s skin with a light tremor. He sat up and leaned over Grady for the bedside table.

“You have?”

“Top drawer,” Grady said. He kept his hands flat and useless at his sides even though he wanted to touch more in that moment than he’d ever wanted to touch someone in his life, but Cole had said and so he was going to stay still.

Cole came back, went up on his knees so he could pull his pants down. He rolled to the side, off Grady, got rid of them before sitting up, swinging his leg over and returning to the same position. He managed to make it look so awkward that Grady huffed a laugh.

“What?”

“Nothin’.”

“Can’t make that look sexy.”

“I reckon you do all right.”

Cole smiled, some lightness returning. He sat so his bare ass was cradling Grady’s dick and rubbed a bit. Grady didn’t move, but it was a test.

“You always such a sweet talker?” Cole asked, the breathlessness giving away his anxiety as he inched up and uncapped the lube. He got his fingers wet before reaching back around and working himself open.

“Ain’t no one accused me of it before.”

Grady’s hands were opening and clenching at his sides as he watched Cole riding his fingers. His head was tipped back, and little punched-out breaths were coming out of him. Grady really wanted to grip his thighs, but he stayed where he was.

Cole must’ve pulled his fingers out, because the next thing Grady knew they were wrapped around his shaft and stroking. Grady almost pushed up.

“Still,” Cole said.

Grady would’ve thought Cole was messing with him, but he still looked unsure and afraid, so Grady nodded and held still as Cole lined him up and sank down.

Cole was shaking, his eyes closed and breaths short as he got himself all the way down.

It looked like pleasure, but it looked like something else too.

“Cole.”

Cole punched out a breath and pushed up, but he didn’t open his eyes. His brow was creased, and he seemed like he was in pain, caught in some place far away from here in Grady’s bed.

“Cole, look at me.”

Cole opened his eyes and looked at Grady.

He sunk back down and gasped. His eyes never left Grady’s as he got a slow, torturous rhythm going.

Grady stayed still and let him. It felt incredible—the tight, warm pressure on his dick, Cole taking what he needed.

Grady saw the fear starting to fall away, the pleasure and comfort seeping in as Cole took and Grady willingly gave it to him.

“Touch me,” Cole gasped as he sank down.

Grady sat up. He brought his hands to Cole’s back and moved his knees up so Cole was cradled in his lap.

He kissed him. Cole kissed him back urgently, and Grady fucked up into him.

He snaked his hand into Cole’s hair and pumped his hips up to hear Cole gasp.

Cole’s eyes searched Grady’s as their lips parted and they panted into each other’s mouths.

Grady felt Cole clenching around him, his come wet between them. Grady thrust in and let himself go. He kissed Cole as he did so, frantic with it. Cole met him, these little wounded sounds coming out of him like he was overwhelmed.

Grady didn’t want to let him go as he came down. He held Cole in his lap and kissed him slow and gentle. He rubbed his back until Cole pulled away and dropped his head on Grady’s shoulder.

“Thank you,” Cole said into his skin.

Grady tightened his hold. “Ain’t gotta thank a man for a good fuck.”

Cole laughed, the feel of it whistling over Grady’s clavicle.

“You know what I mean.”

Grady swept his hand up Cole’s back and thought he did know what Cole meant, but he couldn’t have put a single word to what that was and what was going on. He kissed Cole’s hairline, held him close. He felt Cole answering him when his long limbs wrapped around him, squeezed him tight.

Cole’s come was drying, cold and sticky between them, and Grady was going soft, but he didn’t want to let go, and Cole didn’t either.

So they stayed like that, the fire crackling below them, the rain pattering the tin roof, the wind shaking the windowpanes in a series of whines and blows as familiar to Grady as the sound of his own heartbeat.