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17

RAIN

“Okay, let me get this straight.” Tristan looked up at the ceiling, concentrating. “Because you argued with Bryce and Kate threatened him, Bryce switched out her pan, she hurt her hand, and The Pointe burned down?”

“You’re almost right.” Rain got a water bottle from the fridge, still buzzing from his texting session with the Lucy Loudspeaker herself. “The Pointe didn’t burn down. According to Kate, the main room, the foyer, and some of the offices were destroyed but the rest of the building only had smoke damage.”

“Wow,” leaning back against the counter, Tristan let out a long exhale. “I’m so happy you got out of that alive, kid.”

“Me too.” Averting his gaze, Rain uncapped the bottle. He’d told Tristan an edited version of everything, leaving out his mother and Gage’s visit, the argument with Mason, and Rain ignoring the alarm, because the real story would give him a heart attack.

“Is Bryce going to be charged?” Tristan asked as they walked to the living room. Rain got comfortable on the couch while Tristan sat across from him in the overstuffed chair. “Do they have any proof?”

“Yeah, like, seven people noticed him do it since he’s too dumb to be stealthy, but no one knew it was the wrong pan, stuff gets changed all the time. But someone casually mentioned it in the group chat and things took off from there.” Rain made an oh boy face. “Then I remembered that Bryce had been skulking around when Kate said that pan burned her hand, so I texted Marci and that’s when it got really wild. John had me and the other witnesses write statements about it. On the bright side, at least Bryce won’t be back when the place reopens.” The fire and Bryce’s part in it had everyone forgetting about Rain’s family drama and by the time the place was fixed it would be very old news, so Rain felt comfortable about returning to The Pointe.

Tristan shook his head, invested and shocked, his presence even more soothing post-hike. Staying with him after living in Mason’s cavelike sanctuary had been an adjustment, but thankfully the transition had been easier than expected and Rain needed that. After being humiliated at his job, barely surviving a fire, and leaving Mason, he’d maxed out on stress and couldn’t take any more.

“From Kate’s latest update, Bryce hasn’t been arrested yet, but if he is, I’m sure she’ll let me and everyone else know. Besides, he also burned her on purpose, so she could file charges too? I guess? She didn’t say anything about it. I think she’s too busy enjoying her vacation.” Rain sighed, snuggling into the corner of the couch. “I can’t believe that Owen and Marci went to bat for us, threatening a strike if John didn’t give everyone full pay.” He snickered. “And John gave in quick . It’s nice having an all-expenses-paid break for the next few months.”

“It must suck for him though, losing his building,” Tristan stated, stroking his beard, which he’d tamed down after the trail. Tall, with sandy brown hair and eyes to match, Tristan got almost as many stares in public as Rain did, and while he was still ruggedly lean in a way that told people he’d been through an athletic feat, he’d started filling back out.

“John is okay with it. He’s been wanting to remodel but when you’re booked solid for years?” Rain shrugged. “You can’t just take away the main room.”

“What did happen to everyone getting married there?” Tristan asked, lounging back, both of them enjoying a lazy Tuesday afternoon.

“I know this is gonna sound crazy but trust me, it’s true.” Rain tried not to giggle. “There’s a pastry chef network throughout the area. Kate reached out to her legion and they worked with their halls to fit in whatever clients they could. A bunch of people got refunds on their deposits but The Pointe won’t be down for long.”

“He won’t be able to rebuild too quickly,” Tristan pursed his lips. “They have to do an investigation, there’s insurance-”

“Tristan, he’s stupidly rich and knows, like, a million people. I’m sure he’s paying off everyone he can.” Rain took another swig of his water.

Thankfully, the wedding hall drama was a great distraction because while he felt quite safe at Tristan’s he wasn’t happy; he was heartbroken. Even though he and Mason had started at a hundred miles an hour by immediately living together, over the months their spark had built into a raging bonfire, scorching Rain’s soul with heated memories and bringing him right to the edge of love, only for the flames to die out, leaving behind nothing but smoke.

He wished he’d never felt anything at all because the ache in his chest was almost too much. Suddenly, all those songs about broken hearts were true and Rain had been streaming them on his headphones as he’d moped around the apartment.

Even Mouse seemed to miss Mason, whining at the door and howling at night, keeping Rain up, and he’d spend hours staring into the dark, thinking about how Mason had held onto him after the fire and the pain on his face when he’d walked out.

Over time, Rain began to wonder if he’d overreacted. He couldn’t deny that the altar and its contents were a creepy violation, but not to the extent he first thought it to be. At the time, if Mason had walked in and asked to join the threesome, Rain would’ve said yes. It’s not like he’d been private or modest in the past so why be freaked out about Mason capturing something semi-public? He knew from the start that sneaky photos were part of the package and that Mason wouldn’t do anything nefarious with them. He also knew that neither of them approached love in any normal way.

Now that he had some distance, maybe this obsession with Rain was Mason’s type of love and Rain would be lying to himself if he said that he didn’t like it.

When he’d first found the altar he’d panicked and jumped to conclusions, accusing Mason of using him, of lying to him, but that couldn’t be further from the truth. Rain’s nightly ruminations showed him all the little things that Mason had done, the ways he’d shown his affection, and they piled up into an irrefutable truth - Mason had cared; whatever they’d had wasn’t a lie. Sure, Mason had made a few mistakes but Rain hadn’t been perfect either, and if Mason had been using him, then that meant he’d been using Mason too, just like his mother had used Tristan and then Gage.

But Rain was different from her because what he felt for Mason was deep and soul-changing, yet it didn’t matter. He’d left, causing a rift that he didn’t know how to cross.

In the past, he’d coped by using busy hands and extra shifts to dissociate, but he didn’t want to do that anymore. So, instead of picking up a side job, he decided to use his break to unpack some trauma, and thanks to Mason, he had a clear starting point.

“It’s not harassment. It’s abuse , sexual abuse.”

Ever since Mason had uttered those words they’d picked at Rain like crows, lingering in the back of his mind, and over the last few weeks he’d had nothing but time to figure out if there was truth behind them.

Sadly, it didn’t take Rain long to confirm that there was, finding stories on the internet that mirrored his own, and buying books that explained so much of his feelings and behavioral patterns that he’d felt personally called out. He’d only started the exercises, so he hadn’t seen much change; however, he’d made a decision not to sleep with anyone for a while because he could only fill the void in his heart with Mason.

Sitting up straight, Tristan grimaced and then stood, shaking out his knee.

“I guess that means it’s time to do my stretches.” Holding onto the chair, he folded his leg back until his heel touched his butt, letting out a groan. Tristan’s hike had given him so much - amazing pictures, lifelong friends, incredible memories, and a knee injury that required several months of healing.

“Has it been any better lately? Is physical therapy helping?” Rain’s brow furrowed in concern.

Letting out a breath, the pain on his face drained as he continued stretching, “I think it’s getting better, so yeah, the physical therapy is helping.” He quickly looked away, the top of his cheeks dusting with color, but before Rain could comment on it, he changed the subject.

“Still no word?”

Rain knew that he was asking about Eve, and Tristan had gotten an edited version of Rain’s no-contact decision too because Rain was no longer a toddler adult, just finding his footing, and Tristan didn’t need to know every part of his struggle. He’d seen enough.

“Yep!” Rain sighed in relief. “She’s blocked on my phone, doesn’t know where we live, and my wedding hall is being renovated. I am going to live my own life, without her.”

“I think that’s a great viewpoint and I’m happy that you came to it on your own.” He changed legs, pulling the left one back, his face going as tight as his quad. “Listen, I’m sorry that I left but-”

“If you apologize, I’m gonna throw this water bottle at you.” Rain waved it back and forth. “I know you stayed with her longer than you wanted to, for me, and I don’t think I could ever repay you for that. You did more than enough. As far as I’m concerned? You were my real parent.”

“Kid.” Tristan’s eyes shimmered with tears and he blinked rapidly. “I hate to say it but with your mother, you needed someone. I’m glad I got to be that someone.”

“I’m glad too. You gave me normalcy. That’s why you shouldn’t feel guilty in any way about doing things for yourself.” Rain tried to be lovingly stern. “Sometimes you can be too accepting, which is why you and Mom got along so well.”

“Guilty,” Tristan chuckled. “I did a lot of thinking on my thru and you’re right. I do take things on the chin, I’m not bothered by much, I don’t get angry. That’s why my trail name was Breezy, because even after four days of torrential storms I was the only hiker in the hostel who wasn’t upset.”

“I think it’s good and bad,” Rain told him. “Sure, it’s great that you’re stable. Why be pissed at the weather? But if you’re hiding who you are and what you want, setting yourself on fire to keep others warm? That sucks.”

“When did you get so smart, kid?” Tristan winked at him, dropping the other leg and placing both hands on the back of the chair, stretching his calves.

“Being away from Mom does that to a person. As soon as I moved in with Mason, my brain cleared,” Rain stated without thinking and the sadness hit him like a truck a few seconds later. His face must’ve fallen because Tristan gave him a supportive look.

“I’m sorry that it didn’t work out with him.”

“I’m sorry that it didn’t work out with him too.” Rain’s lips settled into a thin line. “And for the millionth time, thank you for letting me stay here.” Even though he’d told himself not to depend on Tristan, that’s exactly what he’d ended up doing.

“Don’t thank me, kid. You’re helping me out,” Tristan grinned sheepishly. A member of Tristan’s tramily had a friend in real estate, helping Tristan land a gorgeous two-bedroom in a nearby town; however, like many thru-hikers, Tristan was having trouble with post-trail life. He’d gone through several jobs in a short time, trying to find something that would stick, and was currently unemployed so Rain was glad he could contribute.

“Good.” He toasted Tristan with his water and they hung out, chatting a bit before Tristan left to take a shower. Too comfortable to move, Rain stayed nestled in the corner of the couch and Mouse eventually wandered over to glare at him.

“You need to stop acting up at night, babygirl.” Taking out his cell, Rain stared at it. He wanted to change his number and completely cut his mother off, but Mason might call, so he’d left it, blocking her everywhere he could instead. However, he should face reality because it had been almost three weeks and Rain hadn’t heard from Mason at all. Even though he’d been the one to storm out, he thought that Mason would try to contact him by now, especially with the exhibition looming.

A soft chirp sounded, followed by several more, and Rain stared at his phone, understanding on a deeper level exactly why Mason had wanted to screen his calls. Heart rate rising, he took in a breath and steeled himself, hoping that it might be Mason but also hoping not, all of his optimism dissolving as several texts from an unknown number shouted at him.

RAINY TALK 2 ME NOW

BABY PLZ COPS TOOK GAGE

I NEED MY RAINY PLEASE!!!!!!!

All the breath whooshed out of Rain as he practically heard her voice. The cops took Gage? Why? An internet search had confirmed that he’d spent some time behind bars for DUI but he’d gotten out two years ago. Had he done it again?

Had Mason done something? No, that was laughable.

Rain jumped as the phone chimed a few more times, his eyes staying glued to the screen. Mouse began to cry, her worried meows sounding like they came from a distance. This was bad for Rain but he couldn’t look away, even as he began to sweat and his breaths came in little pants.

RAIN I AM UR MOM U HAVE 2 HELP ME!!!!!!!

stop ignoring my texts rain i know this is ur number. doNT IGNORE ME U SHIT I GAVE BIRTH 2 U. U OWE ME CALL ME RIGHT NOW.

i should’ve aborted you i didn’t think you’d turn out to be so ungrateful. U R suposed to be here 4 me. call me or u will b sorry.

Now would be a good time to put down the phone but he stared, hypnotized, his trauma holding him hostage as more messages beat on him, one after the other.

CALL ME NOW

NOW RAIN NOW

I WONT STOP

ILLL FIND U RAIN AND ILL ABORT U

UR A PIECE OF SHIT FORGET U HAVE A MOTHER

Something blocked the screen and suddenly the phone was gone, breaking the spell, and he gasped for air as Tristan appeared in front of him, wrapped in a bathrobe, his hair wet.

“Try to breathe, kid. Try to breathe…” Fear on his face, Tristan gently rubbed Rain’s arms as he wheezed. What the hell was happening? Why couldn’t he take a full breath? Reaching up, he touched his cheeks, his fingers coming away wet. When had he started crying?

Slowly, his lung capacity returned to normal and he wiped his face, shivering hard as sweat dried along his back.

“Doing better now?” Tristan patted his hands while Mouse headbutted his arm.

“Y-Yeah,” Rain croaked, giving Mouse a few scritches. “I’m o-okay, girl.”

“What happened, kid?” Sitting on the coffee table across from him, Tristan waited, stress in his gaze, and Rain couldn’t help but feel bad because right now he didn’t want to talk to Tristan. He wanted to talk to Mason, and hold him, and sleep next to him in that huge dark room with Mouse kneading biscuits at the end of the bed.

He missed it all so much.

More tears gathered in Rain’s eyes and he quickly brushed them away. Not trusting himself to speak, he gestured at his phone, giving Tristan permission to read.

Picking it up, Tristan scanned the screen, a stern frown forming on his face that grew larger and more menacing as he scrolled back. When he finally looked up at Rain, his eyes held such uncharacteristic fury that Rain forgot about his tears. He’d only seen that expression on Tristan’s face once before, during the breakup, but to see it again because of what had been said to him? Rain wished, not for the first time, that he’d been Tristan’s real son.

But, in a way, he was.

Standing up, Tristan held out his hand.

“How about we get you a new number? Then you’ll never have to deal with her again.”

Rain didn’t have to think about it because he’d given Mason more than enough time. If he hadn’t called by now, he wasn’t going to and Rain needed to focus on his safety. Nodding, he took Tristan’s hand, his heart simultaneously lighter and heavier because not only was he cutting the final tie to his mother but maybe to Mason as well.

Rain slumped in a booth at the back of an almost empty diner. “I don’t know what to do.”

“What do you want to do?” Taking a gulp of water, Tommy spun the salt shaker around as they waited for their food.

“I don’t knoooow Tommy. That’s why I’m asking you.” If he slouched any more, he’d be under the table.

“Why do you want my advice? I’m not, like, a love expert or anything.” Tommy’s grin held some self-deprecation and Rain squinted at him.

“You’ve been with Amanda for a year and a half, right?” When Tommy nodded, Rain gestured at him. “See, you’re way more of an expert than I am.”

“What about Ollie? Him and Finn are going on a year.” Why did Tommy always play the devil’s advocate? Trying not to fling a sugar packet at him, Rain crossed his arms.

“What they have isn’t natural,” he said with a good-natured snort. “They’re too much in love.”

“You can never be too much in love,” Tommy rebutted, wagging his finger. Tall and athletic with golden curls like Ollie, Tommy never had a problem finding dates; to be honest, he’d always been popular as fuck and Rain had ridden in the sidecar to that - going to the best parties, getting into clubs underage, and finding the hottest hookups.

That seemed so long ago; he’d been a different Rain then. Mason had changed him, which was why he’d gathered Tommy for a heart-to-heart.

Picking up on Rain’s musing, Tommy leaned in earnestly.

“Have you spoken since the breakup?”

Rain sighed again, feeling older than his years. “It wasn’t a breakup. We were never officially together .” He made air quotes around the last word.

“You lived in the same house and had sex almost daily, that’s marriage,” Tommy deadpanned.

Rain gave him a look that was met with a smirk.

“Okay, so has there been any contact since you didn’t break up?”

“No.” Rain pursed his lips. “And I had to change my number because of my mom, so now he can’t get in touch with me even if he wanted to.”

“Do you want him to?” Invested, Tommy’s eyebrows rose.

“Kinda.” Even though the conversation was grueling, Rain needed this. He’d spent most of the last five months with Mason and hadn’t seen Tommy nearly enough. Texting and video chat didn’t replace dinner, or gaming, or just hanging out, and Rain needed to make more of an effort to travel the hour to see his brother.

“Then why did you not break up?” Tommy pushed in just the right way.

“I know he has feelings for me but...” Rain didn’t know how to explain the altar, his reaction to it, his long nights awake, and his indecision about contacting Mason again. He missed Mason, but were there still stars in his eyes or was he just blinded from the aftereffects? He needed a sounding board, an objective ear, and Tommy was the perfect candidate. “But he’s kind of obsessed with me.”

“In a stalker way?” Tommy asked, and they both lapsed into silence as the waiter brought over their food, their conversation pausing while they dug in. After a few bites, Rain put down his burger.

“No, not in a stalker way.” Rain gave the room another glance but thankfully the other patrons were seated out of earshot. “In a taking creepy pictures and making a giant photo collage of me on his darkroom wall kind of way.”

“That’s…nice? I mean, aren’t you his model?” Tommy had already demolished a third of his plate.

“It’s not nice.” Rain picked at his fries. “Because he started it before I moved in and some of the photos are of me with Caden and Bryce in The Pointe’s storage room, something Mason was not a part of.”

“ What? ” Tommy hissed, dropping his fork, but Rain wasn’t done.

“And when I moved in he just put a sheet over it and a shelving unit in front. Didn’t even take the thing down.”

“Oh, so it is in a stalker way.” Concern lurked in Tommy’s light brown eyes.

“Don’t worry, he’s not dangerous. He’s just…he’s a sweet, introverted artist who fell in love with me.” Rain still felt the need to defend Mason because there was a difference between being malicious and being foolish, and Mason’s eager obsession had fallen into the latter. It didn’t excuse the violation but it softened the blow. “And honestly, I can forgive the whole threesome voyeur thing-”

“Because if you knew he was there you would’ve shown him your asshole too,” Tommy stated matter-of-factly.

“You know me so well.” Why hadn’t he talked to Tommy sooner? “And I can even forgive the wall altar.”

Tommy coughed through a laugh, swallowing his food. “Because you’re fucking full of yourself.”

“When you’re right, you’re right,” Rain shrugged with a smile that quickly fell. “But with him running hot and cold on admitting his feelings?” He sighed, shaking his head.

“Do you have any idea why he won’t admit them?”

Drawing up a knee between him and the table, Rain stared down at it. “Because he’s scared. He’s been bullied his whole life, by his family, by other kids. And, um, it turns out that Gage used to torture Mason in high school.”

Tommy opened and closed his mouth like a fish before finally finding some words. “That’s…I don’t even know what that is. What the fuck?”

“Right?” Rain took another bite of his burger. “Mason froze up the minute he saw him.”

“Aw, the poor guy.” Reaching over, Tommy stole a few of Rain’s fries, stuffing them in his mouth as Rain put down the burger again, his stomach twisting. Between the foyer incident, the fire, and the collage, things had gotten messy and Rain had a lot of regrets.

“I can’t figure out if missing him this much - if hurting this much - is normal, if I might’ve overreacted to things, if I’m stupid to want to forgive him and go back to him. Am I nuts?” Rain blinked as his eyes blurred. “I just don’t know what to do.” Great, they’d come full circle.

Tommy grabbed a few more fries. “You know I can’t tell you what to do. That’s something you have to decide for yourself, but for what it’s worth? I’ve never seen you this torn up about anyone. Usually, you’re the one in control. You never pine over men. You never care. You’re not nuts, you’re obsessed too.” He grinned. “Besides, you abandoned me for this dude, so he must be fucking amazing. I mean, aside from the stalker thing.”

Rain let out a humorless chuckle.

“Yeah…aside from the stalker thing.” But he found himself with even more questions. If he did decide to contact Mason again, when should he do it? And even if Rain wanted to work things out, Mason might not, and he might never want to share his feelings. Was Rain setting himself up to fail?

“Are you going to the show?” Tommy scraped his plate clean. “You are his model.”

Rain had been considering it. Seeing Mason in a public place, even from far away, might give him some answers. If he ended up feeling exactly as he had when he’d walked out, then he’d crush this obsession, but if he didn’t?

That was the part he was stuck on.

Tommy was right, giving Mason another chance was Rain’s decision to make, yet he still couldn’t trust his judgment. He needed a sign, something that told him he’d be rewarded if he risked his heart a third time, not crushed into the earth.

“I’m thinking about it,” Rain played with the end of his ponytail. “But what if he sees me and it gets weird? I don’t want to ruin it for him.” Because that would ruin Rain too.

Taking a bite of Rain’s burger, Tommy raised his eyebrows. “If he feels anything for you? Showing up won’t ruin it.”

Rain gave him a wan smile, wondering if he should just stay home. “I hope you’re right.”