Page 23 of Nothing to Fear (Wicked Games #1)

Asher

W atching Silas walk away from me was agonizing torture.

There’s so much I want to talk to him about, so much I want to learn.

I don’t know what caused me to take that leap with him, but seeing him storm off in a jealous rage just flipped a switch.

The pieces I’ve seen glimpses of over the last few weeks have been little crumbs I’ve gobbled up like a starved man.

Now that I’ve tasted him? I need the whole loaf.

No more bits strewn about when his guard is down, I want all of him.

I meant everything I said to him; if I thought I was hooked on him before, it’s nothing compared to now.

I went back to my dorm with the promise that I’d stay there, knowing I needed to get my head straight after everything that happened.

I didn’t last long. My impatience bubbles over, and desire wins out.

So here I am, standing in front of Harrow House again, hidden against the dark backdrop of the night, the quiet stillness surrounding me as I look up into the windows.

When I imagined my senior year at Corvus, it never crossed my mind that stalking Silas Blackwood would be at the top of my list of hobbies, but here I am.

I can’t shake him from my mind. He’s the center of my focus from the moment my eyes open in the morning, and he haunts my dreams while I sleep.

Touching him earlier about did me in. The way he melts for my touch is both agonizingly erotic and heartbreakingly beautiful all at the same time.

There’s a wild part of me that wants him so desperate for me that he can’t think straight, but there’s also a protective part of me that wants to burn the world down forever, making this man feel desperate for anything.

A raven lands above me, croaking once, as if demanding my attention before flying off.

I watch his wings flap in the wind, flying above to the second story of Harrow House, landing softly on the ledge in front of a window.

His beady eyes look at me from above, croaking again, echoing loudly into the night.

Chills race up my spine, the feeling I’ve had for weeks making me shiver.

A gust of wind pushes me, as if ushering me along.

The school itself has to be speaking to me, pushing me toward where I need to go.

Knowing there’s no point in denying fate, I leave the cover of the trees and walk into Harrow House, taking the stairs to the second floor and easily navigating down a familiar hallway, mentally counting the doors to where the room should be.

Lucky for me, I’d learned how to get past a locked dorm room door when Parker and I had locked ourselves out in the past. Pulling out my ID card, I slide it through the doorframe and the lock.

With a little pressure and patience, the lock disengages, and I slowly turn the handle with my heart in my throat.

Listening for any movement, I slip inside, finding myself in the living room of a small apartment.

An apartment that is eerily familiar. It’s a single, based on the layout, which means I don’t have to worry about running into his roommate.

I quickly navigate to his bedroom, the door wide open, as if he were waiting for me.

Silas sleeps soundly in bed, his blond hair rumpled and mussed, his long eyelashes fanning over his cheeks.

He’s shirtless, the blankets only covering up to his waist. He’s all defined, toned muscle .

. . all man, and so mouthwatering. He’s so painfully beautiful.

I watch him sleep for a while, the steady rise and fall of his breathing, and I so badly want to strip out of my restrictive clothes, rest my head against his chest, and fall asleep to the thump of his strong heartbeat.

I’ll make him see that this is okay; he can’t continue to live and pretend to be someone he’s not. I can help him embrace who he is here at Corvus; I won’t let anything happen to him. He’s just gotta learn to trust me and want it bad enough for himself.

I take a moment to look around his room, déjà vu a thick feeling, making my head swirl as unease travels up my spine.

I know I’ve been here before. But then I spot it.

The last remaining clue, clicking everything into place.

My eyes land on a mask sitting on his desk.

The eyes crossed out with Xs, and I bet if I turned it on, it would glow red.

Visions of that mask that have haunted my dreams over the last few weeks come to life behind my eyes.

The way we danced together, our bodies teasing and tempting, the scramble to a free room, and the race to free our aching cocks.

The way my bare skin felt on his—the electricity that never stopped flowing through me at the spot where we were connected skin to skin.

The way I braced myself above him as I watched my cock disappear into his body, the way he clenched around me when he came so good for me.

Both times. The last one being here for seven minutes in hell .

My heart thumps wildly in my chest. There’s no fucking way.

My eyes dart back to Silas, sleeping soundly, the navy-blue bedspread that looked black in the dim light that night, the chair that sits in the corner.

It’s all the same. That’s why his body felt so familiar to me, why his whimpers and moans were the biggest turn-on, why my hands knew exactly what would make him melt—because I’ve already been inside him.

I know what it feels like to slip inside his tight ass, to explode inside his warm heat.

I hooked up with Silas Blackwood on the first Fright Night.

And I did it again last week here in his room.

Of course it was him. Being anyone else was never even an option. Everything is leading us to each other.

If I had any doubts about fate, I don’t now.

Silas and I are meant to be together.

Fear be damned.

After returning to my dorm early this morning and taking a long shower, I collapse onto my bed and pull out my phone, knowing there’s only one thing I need to do today.

Get through to Silas. I need to tell him that I’m who he’s been hooking up with, but I don’t know if it will work in my favor or not, so for now, I’m going to focus on getting closer to him, showing him how good this can be.

Me: Good morning.

Silas: Morning?

Me: How’d you sleep?

Silas: Wasn’t expecting you to reach out

Me: Wasn’t expecting you to whimper when I touched your cock

Silas: That was…I don’t know what to say to that.

Me: I know it’s not our regular tutoring day, but I think we should talk

Silas: Yeah maybe

Me: Be there, Si. I want to see you after what happened

Silas: Probably not a good idea

Me: It’s the best idea.

Silas: That can’t happen again, you know that right?

Me: If we both want each other and the timing is right, yeah, it’s gonna happen again.

Silas: Since when did you become so cocky?

Me: Who said I wasn’t always like this when it’s something I desperately want?

The three little bubbles pop up and disappear several times before vanishing altogether. He’ll be there. He feels this thing between us just as much as I do.

I spend the rest of the day studying, but my mind never strays far from the blond slacker I can’t get enough of .

I skip dinner, choosing to get to the archives hours before Silas.

Being surrounded by these old books, all the information, history, and secrets they hold, used to be all I needed to feel at peace.

I craved the solitary environment and the quiet stillness of the rooms of the archives.

But now? Being down here makes me think of Silas.

I no longer feel whole and at ease in a place that was my safe spot for so long.

Now, I crave my counterpart. My opposite in every way.

This place belongs to both of us now, and it feels empty without him.

Hours go by as I lose myself to the diary of Belladonna Thorne, reading over her time as a student at Corvus and then as a professor, but my eyes keep drifting to the arched stone entryway, waiting for my blond jock to walk in.

The moment Silas comes into view around the corner, all the words I wanted to say to him fly out the window.

He’s wearing a crimson Corvus College Rugby hoodie and a pair of grey sweatpants that hug his muscular thighs.

His blond hair is pushed out of his face, a rogue piece falling loose over his forehead.

He looks every bit the role he’s perfected for as long as I’ve known him, but now that I know how he melts under my touch? I’m desperate for it.

I’m on my feet, moving in his direction before I’ve realized it. His crystal-blue eyes flash with passion, his lips turning up in a wicked, sexy grin. Filthy liar. I know he wants me.

Fear can be such a bitch, holding you hostage against your will.

But it can also be freeing if you lean into it. You can learn so much from fear if you can conquer it. I’m not going to let it control him anymore.

My hands reach for him without hesitation, one sliding around his waist, the other around his neck, his body so warm despite the cold air outside, pulling him into me.

Silas doesn’t miss a beat this time. Our lips connect as his hands wrap around my waist, his fingers digging into my flesh as he pulls me until we’re flush against each other. The kiss is nothing like it was last night; there’s nothing frantic about it, but it’s still every bit as passionate.

An inferno rages inside me as Silas slips his tongue across my lips, coaxing them open for him. I comply, accepting and meeting him in the middle.

“We’ve got shit to talk about,” he gasps against my mouth.

“Kiss first, talk later.”

“Ungh.” His words are unintelligible as I fill his mouth with my tongue, silencing any protest he may still have. He tastes like spearmint and something so very him that I can’t get enough of.