Page 31 of Not that Sea-Rious

Marissa

M arissa was drunk, but it had nothing to do with the bold red wine on their table.

She’d only had a glass and a half. The elegant presentation of their meals, the white-glove service, and the gourmet food had her overwhelmed.

This was a level of luxury she never expected on a four-day cruise with her girlfriends.

Then again, she hadn’t anticipated meeting Beau either.

If she learned anything over the last few days, it was to roll with it. Sitting back, testing the stretchiness of her flowy dress, she admired the redheaded man from over her glass of wine while the two of them pretended to contemplate dessert.

She feigned waffling between the chocolate sampler and cheese when she’d already decided on the hazelnut cheesecake. Beau stared out the window into the darkness of the ocean, swirling his wine.

Something was on his mind. His mood had shifted from the jovial display he’d shown for the entire cruise to slightly somber.

“What’s wrong?” she asked, putting down the menu.

His gaze lowered, and he inhaled audibly before he met her eyes. “I’m trying to stay in the moment—this fantastic dinner and your wonderful company.”

She shifted in her seat and focused on him. A knot formed in her very full gut when the nerves from earlier returned. She hadn’t missed them while they enjoyed their food and each other’s company. Now, she waited with bated breath for what he’d say next.

“When I booked this trip, I was freshly un- engaged.”

His admission punched her in the chest. She knew he’d been dating someone and had recently broken up but engaged ? That was a level of involvement she hadn’t expected. He asked someone to spend the rest of his life with him. Yet here he was, having dinner with her.

Why she felt a twinge of betrayal was beyond her. He hadn’t lied. She hadn’t asked.

Initially, when he began, he’d looked at her, but now he stared through her with a haunted expression as he continued. “The night before we were supposed to leave, I came home early and found my best friend and business partner balls deep in my fiancée.”

Beau took a large gulp of the wine.

Marissa did the same. This was a lot to process.

“I couldn’t get a refund, so I figured I had to go. You know? It’d be a useless waste of money if someone didn’t sail.”

She nodded but had the distinct feeling that while he was talking to her, he wasn’t looking for her input. Which was good. She hadn’t a clue what she was supposed to say, so she sat there in the discomfort and listened.

“I got on the ship fully intending to drink myself into liver failure.” He smirked and focused on her. “Then I met you.”

She wasn’t sure what to do. In her awkwardness, she sat straighter.

“Without you and your friends, I’d probably be in the on-ship hospital with alcohol poisoning.” He chuckled and shook his head. “Not in a suicidal way, just in a drink-to-forget sort of thing.”

He closed his eyes, took a deep breath, and seemed to regroup.

She still had no words. Giving him space allowed her the opportunity to process all he’d shared.

“I don’t know how you did it, but somehow you showed me there was a life worth living.” He raised his glass. “Thank you for that.”

Glancing around, making sure no one else could hear them as there were a few other people also frequenting the steak house, she smiled. Marissa cleared her throat and tapped her glass against his. “You’re welcome. I guess.”

He nodded and took another sip. “I needed you to know that. I didn’t want any sort of big secret to come out,” he said with furrowed brows. His gaze had fixated on the faux flickering candle between them. “Because I’d like for us to see each other.”

“O-oh,” she stuttered.

Licking his bottom lip, he placed his glass down, caught her eyes, and reached for her hands over the table. “And I haven’t a clue what that means.”

Did he expect her to know?

“I probably shouldn’t rush into something, considering my recent engagement. Time to heal and whatnot.” He waved his hand in a circular motion. “But I’m certain my existence will be better with you in it.”

Someone sucked the air out of the room. How was Marissa supposed to respond to any of that?

Beau squeezed her hands. Hopefulness looked absolutely adorable on him.

Her stomach fluttered from his confession. Who wouldn’t be flattered by the guy they crushed on admitting his feelings so genuinely and authentically as he just had? He’d laid his heart on the table. What the hell was she going to do with it?

“I-I have to admit, I have no idea what to say,” she said.

He nodded and lowered his gaze while releasing his grip on her.

“Don’t get me wrong. The last four days have been a whirlwind of alcohol and good times. I would love to keep on riding this wave, but I don’t— It’s not realistic. I’d love it to be, but I just—”

“No. No. You’re right.” He offered her a weak smile. “I don’t know what I was thinking.” He lifted his glass. “Probably too much of this.”

Which was a lie. Out of all the nights they spent together, he drank the least and ate the most during their dinner date. He was sober. Which made this conversation so much worse. He had every one of his faculties. She had hers. He spoke from the heart, and she shot him down.

When he brought the glass to his lips, tipped it, and filled his mouth with the rest of the wine, Marissa’s heart sank. She didn’t want to reject him.

“I’m trying—”

He waved a free hand before returning the empty vessel to the table. “Seriously, don’t worry about it. I only wanted to be honest with you, and I was, and you were with me.”

Frowning, she slumped in her chair. This wasn’t how this evening was supposed to go. They were meant to laugh, flirt, and end the cruise drunk as hell in his bed, exhausted after a plethora of orgasms. Talking about anything beyond this evening wasn’t a part of the plan.

Lifting the small menu, he focused on that. “So, dessert? Yes or no? That apple something or other is calling my name. Did you want indulge before we head to the piano bar for karaoke?”