Page 47 of No Funny Business

“Yeah,” Nick says.

“Well, we just sent someone over to look at it and there ain’t no way we’re gonna get it fixed by tonight.” Uh-oh. With this heat, sleeping in the Jeep is hardly an option. “We’ve gotta move you to another room. One will be available this afternoon.”

“Only one?” I ask.

“Yes, ma’am. It’s a king room.” King room? As in one king bed with plenty of room for Nick and me to roll around in? “Wait a second.” Fredrick narrows his eyes at Nick. “You look familiar. What’s your name again?”

“Nick Leto.”

“Hold up, I’ve seen you on The Comedy Channel? You’re a comedian, right?”

Nick welcomes this semi–celeb sighting with open arms. “Yes, I am.”

The clerk offers his hand. “Oh, man, you’re a funny dude. You’re playing Cedric’s club tonight?”

“You know Cedric?” Nick asks.

Who’s Cedric?

“Yeah, that’s my big brother.”

“Oh, I see, Fredrick and Cedric,” Nick says. “You got another brother named Hedrick too?”

“Actually, yeah. It’s like our dad’s Dr. Seuss or some shit.” Nick and Fredrick share a laugh but I still can’t get past the one-room—one-bed—one-night issue. “I’ll tell you what, I’ll comp your whole stay for the AC inconvenience but y’all gotta come out and have a drink after the show with us. It’s Cedric’s birthday.”

“Hey, thanks, man. I really appreciate that. We’ll be there.” Nick offers Fredrick one of those slick handshakes like the two are old buddies, and the motel manager heads off. When he’s out of earshot, Nick turns to me. “Did you hear that? Free stay and he thinks I’m hilarious.”

“He said you were funny. Not hilarious,” I say. “So you’re sleeping on a cot tonight, right?”

“What’s the matter, not in the mood to cuddle anymore?”

I want so much more than cuddling, which is the problem. “No, it’s weird. I feel like Charlie Bucket’s grandparents all smushed in one bed.”

“Okay, if you’re not comfortable sharing a bed, maybe I’ll find somewhere else to sleep.” He doesn’t say so but I know he’s referring to a lady friend. Being beneath the sheets with him is a terrible idea but I don’t want him under someone else’s sheets either.