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CHAPTER TWELVE

NASH

Vale smiles with tears streaming down her flushed cheeks, and it breaks me open.

She’s so beautiful.

Stop time. I don’t want this moment to end. My urge to kiss her lips is so damn powerful, but I think I know why she doesn’t kiss on the lips. I think I killed him.

What I’m willing to do for Vale? What I feel for her?

I love it, and I hate it at the same time. I feel like a saint and a sinner.

Our days and nights at the hotel were the happiest and hardest I’ve ever spent because I knew what she survived, so I waited for her to make a move. She didn’t, neither did I, and it hurt like hell. When I heard her suffering over it like me again tonight, I couldn’t take it anymore.

And here we are.

Me, feeling every emotion I shouldn’t for her, and her, cupping my cheek as she tenderly confesses, “I hate you.”

I nuzzle my nose against hers. “I hate you, too.”

The weight of it feels too intense for us. Like we can’t breathe because we don’t know what’s next, so I lift my dripping fingers to my mouth and taste her cum, making her grin before I smirk. “Your hatred is the best thing I’ve ever tasted.”

She laughs. “Liar.”

“I’ll deceive about some things,” I brush the back of my fingers over her cheek, “but never about this.” I press my glistening digits to her lips, and she obeys. Gently, she sucks as I promise her, “This is our truth, Vale. It has been since that night, and it always will be.”

I take my fingers out, and she asks, “You knew my secret all this time?”

“ Our secret.” I face her, our bodies wedged together.

“After that night and all through college,” she says, “I thought you hated me. Even recently, you acted like you did.”

“I hated that I wanted you. For that, I hated myself for a long time,” I confess, playing with her silky raven hair. “I felt like a horrible man. But please know, I always cared for you, but it wasn’t until you came back after your first month at college that I suddenly felt attracted to you.

“You’d grown so fast in so little time and weren’t a girl anymore. You were suddenly a woman, and it scared the hell out of me because I couldn’t fight it. Not that night. It was driving me insane, and I just needed some relief. I… I thought you were asleep.”

Her fingertip traces over the tiger inked on my pec. Now, it will remind me of her.

“I kind of always wanted you,” she confesses. “Like a crush teens get. It’s innocent and safe. I always felt safe with you. You were always so stern and protective, like you wanted to put a chastity belt on me.”

I laugh. “I did. I…” Careful, she can’t know this secret. “I wanted to protect you because I meant what I said; I’ll kill any man who hurts you.”

It’s so damn hard watching the trauma flash across her stunning eyes, and I can’t comfort her. I can’t confess that I know about her ex.

Or what I did to him. Gladly.

“What happened that night by the pool?” she asks, moving past it. “I mean, for you?”

“I came home after a bad day. A bloody one, actually, and I saw you and Alena laughing and laying out. She was the same, but you’d changed. You looked mature in your black bikini, and it took my breath away. I couldn’t stop thinking about you. God,” I drag my hand down my face, “I felt like a horrible, horny man.”

She laughs. “Then what’s my excuse?”

I cock a brow.

“Because I felt horrible for being horny for you, too. From the time I was sixteen, you gave me pussy quivers.”

I softly chuckle. “Pussy what ?”

“Pussy quivers.” Damn, she’s cute . “You know that feeling you get between your legs that reminds you you’re an animal, not someone who needs to renew their driver’s license.”

Laughter hits me. Jealousy, too. This is a stupid question. Of course, I ask, “Who else gives you pussy quivers?”

She smirks, making it last way too long, circling her fingertip over the lion on my chest. “That sounds like a detail to me,” she teases.

“It sounds like the next thing that better come out of your sassy mouth.”

She sticks her tongue out, and I grab it, making her shriek, then laugh. “Gaaah. Otaayy.” I let go, and she says. “Only you! You’re the pussy party of one in my pants.”

I let that make my fucking day. Week. Year.

Life.

“What about you?” she volleys back. “Who else puts a tingle in your dingle?”

“Dingle? Poison, I’m way too big to dingle.”

“Okay,” she quips. “Who puts a big gong in your giant dong?”

I laugh, wrapping my arms around her. “Woman, you have a PhD in killing me.”

“Then answer the doctor.”

This is the part. The one that makes me regret everything and nothing. “I’ve never allowed myself to feel…” I press my forehead to hers, “this.”

Softly, she asks, “Why not?”

“It’s too dangerous. Too risky. It’s a beast of a life, Vale. And if you ever see that side of me, you won’t like him.”

“You may be a beast, but you’re a good father.” Her fingertip traces over my heart. “I love how you love Alena.”

The words sit on the tip of my tongue, but they’re too dangerous. If I say them, I mean it forever. Vale would be mine forever.

“I love…” I swallow the rocks in my throat, “how you love her, too.”

Suddenly, tears threaten her eyes. They’re not happy; they’re worried. “What are we going to do now?”

“Keep the biggest secret of our lives.”

“Me?” Her brows shoot up. “You expect me and my AK-47 of a mouth not to fire? That feels impossible because I’m holding back a lot of ammo. All the sex secrets from Delta’s. All your mafia stuff. All the Cummings, Jace, Grant, and your private meeting drama. And now this?” She grabs my chest, admitting, “Nash, I can’t lie to Alena.”

“You have to. It’s for her safety.”

“Okay.” She props up on her elbows. “The secret about her dad-in-the-mafia part I get, but not us.”

“Will you quit saying I’m in the mafia?”

“Aren’t you?”

“Bratva.” I blurt and immediately regret it.

Fuck! Lying next to Vale’s almost naked body has me leaking like a sieve.

Her eyes get wide. “Bratva means Russian mafia.”

“No, in Russian, it literally means ‘brothers,’ and that’s what we are.”

“Where have you been hiding all these siblings? I thought you and Alena had no family.”

“No blood family.” I sit up, scrubbing my beard. I need to escape Vale’s gravity, or I’ll sing like a canary.

“So…” she processes. “Jace and Grant and Michael Cummings, they’re like your brothers?”

“We go way back. I owe them. They owe me. We’re bonded for life.”

“Are you Russian?”

“Half Scottish, half Spanish, and done with this conversation.”

She flops back, falling silent.

That spells trouble.

I gaze down and see her overthinking everything.

“Vale,” I warn, “I just told you more than I should. I know silence is a new concept for your mouth, but keep it shut because it also means safety. Because if that ‘Bridge Bastard,’ as we’ll call him, ever gets his hands on you, he’ll break every secret out of you, and your pain will kill me and kill Alena, too.”

The severity registers across her eyes as she nods, studying me before they twinkle.

“Say, please,” she taunts.

Damn, this woman.

I roll on top of her, my hands braced by her head. Slowly, I lower, aiming my mouth for the pulse in her neck. “Please.” I kiss it, she sighs, and my dick stirs. “Shut.” Gently, I kiss under her ear. “The.” I nibble it. She giggles. “Fuck.” I suck her earlobe, making her moan which makes me hard. “Up.”

I’m about to devour every inch of her flesh, but she whispers, “I have another question.”

Softly, I bang my forehead against hers. “Can you just not talk anymore?”

“But I have to know. I’ll go crazy if I don’t. I need this knowledge.”

“I’m not answering Bratva questions either.”

“Good, because it’s a sex one.” I raise a brow. “It’s a two-parter, actually. One, do you jerk off every morning in the shower thinking about me, and two, do you think you can make me come again because I’m skeptical? That orgasm felt like Halley’s comet, like it won’t happen again in seventy-five years, and I’ll be dead by then.”

Kneeling, I rise. I straddle her, carefully tugging her tank top off, and tossing it on the floor.

Once I see her luscious breasts, I confess, “Fuck yes, I jerk off to you in the shower. Sometimes at work in the bathroom. Once in Jace’s truck; don’t tell him. Vale, I meant it. For twelve years, every time I come, I think of you.”

I shift my body so I can take her panties off next. “Here’s a three-part answer to keep you quiet.” I lift them to my nose, inhaling what I did to her. “I used to guess the color of your panties, but now that I know you wear white cotton thongs with little red bows, that’s all you’ll wear for me. Only me. Understood?”

She nods, spreading her thighs, her pussy exposed. “Yes, Mr. Allen.” It hoods my eyelids, the lust that crashes through me. “Now, answer my last question.”

I tug my pajama bottoms down, exposing my cock as I kick them free. I’m so swollen with lust for her; it surprises us both. “You’re not in charge tonight. This is.”

“Oh my god,” she sighs, her eyes taking in the size of what she does to me.

“I’m not going to fuck you, Vale. I swear, I’ll lose my mind and our secret if I’m ever inside you. So, instead…” I crawl over her, needing to kiss her mouth, but I can’t, so I demand, “You’re going to fuck my face with your sweet pussy while I fuck your bed, and I won’t come until I’m drinking yours.”

“Let me taste you,” she gasps. “Nash, let me taste you when you come.”

I don’t agree. Leaning down, I kiss, then bite her neck, fighting the urge to shred her apart until she’s mine. “Time to lose control, Vale.”

But I don’t. This is for her.

I’ve been reading so much in her books about clitoral kisses, suction puckers, and coreplay; I’m about to earn a PhD in her sweet pussy.

I travel down her body, taking my first suck of her hard nipple, and she cups my head, holding me here, her back arching off the bed, her moans my reward for waiting so long.

For years, I’ve obsessed over what it would be like to suck her tits, and once I start, I don’t want to stop. She makes my cock leak. She keeps arching for me, grabbing my hair and moaning when I tongue her nipples, crying out when I suck them. I reach down, barely tickling her clit as I do, and my name keeps filling her gasp.

I can’t take anymore.

I rise, kneeling between her thighs. “Scoot up, baby, to the top of the bed.” She obeys. “That’s it. Now, hold your thighs back. Let me see you spread open for me.”

She holds her knees, and I groan at the shameless sight of her unfolding, of her pink petals, her glistening opening, her swollen lips, her little puckered hole, and the sexy little trim of black hair she keeps groomed over her mound.

I stroke myself, my breath deepening, staring at her, at what I’ve desired for so long, and she surprises me, clenching her muscles, letting me see her swell before my eyes.

“Is this what you want, Mr. Allen?” She does it again, making me watch her opening pulse. “You want to see how wet my pussy gets for you? Come on. Take a little taste of me.”

“Goddamn, you’re my poison.” I salivate. I’ve never been this thirsty before, wanting the taste of a woman so bad. I’ve never felt this dirty and deserving. This desire and determination.

I will make her come. I won’t live without tasting her fall apart over my tongue.

I lie between her thighs, inhaling her and starting slow, steaming my lips gently over hers.

“Oh god, your beard,” she gasps. “Oh god, Nash, it’s so hot. I can feel it on my pussy.”

I grin, barely lingering my tongue from her slick entrance, working my way up to her pearled clit. Gently, I kiss it, and it ignites her moans. I press down, holding her mound still while my tongue is a feather over her clit, my fingertip rimming her entrance. For minutes, every touch is light and teasing until I taste her honey. Until she’s dripping, her breath telling me she needs more.

Much more.

Slowly, I slide my middle finger inside her, swirling my tongue over her clit at the same time, and her desperate moans drop into hungry groans. Her taste fills my mouth, making my hips grind, thrusting my hard cock into her mattress.

She tastes sweeter than I ever imagined. She’s driving me fucking insane with this wet pussy.

Forever, I devour her, getting off on her smell, sounds, taste, and pleasure until it glosses my chin, until I need more, too.

“Look at me, Vale.” I gaze up at her as she meets my stare. “Prop up on some pillows so you can watch.”

She lets go of her legs to grab my pillow and hers while I lift her legs over my shoulders.

“Now do it,” I demand. “Watch me eat your sweet pussy, and use your hips, putting it all over my face. Make me lick and suck you. Make me fuck you with my mouth. Don’t let me breathe anything but you .”

“Oh god,” she sighs, sinking her hands into my hair while I let her guide me.

I slide two fingers inside her while I offer my tongue to serve her demanding clit. Fisting my hair, she controls me and her pleasure. She moves in small circles, then fast jerking motions while I lick, suck, and slurp, losing my mind to the salacious sounds of my spit, her arousal and moans mixing with mine.

Wedging my knees into her bed, the urge is too strong; I make the tempo of my tongue match the thrust of my hips, my cock rubbing against her sheets, imagining all the times she’s fucked herself on them while thinking of me as her juice slides down my neck.

It makes me groan into her writhing sex. She’s wanted me as much as I’ve wanted her. I put the urge to bite her, to have her, to literally eat Vale’s pussy alive into my tongue, fluttering over her swollen clit.

“Oh fuck,” she cries out, holding my head so tight and fucking my face with her pussy; her suffocation is my salvation. I want to dive into her. I need to thrust my hard cock so deep inside her; I make my fingers do it. I pump them hard, making Vale cry out, “Yes, Nash. Yes!”

My cock leaks. It swells, white heat building in my spine while I thrust my hard length against her bed, matching the rhythm of my fingers inside her swollen walls.

“Oh my, god,” she sighs as I glance up at her hooded stare watching me. She can see my bare ass, how I’m fucking her bed while I eat her pussy.

“Now, be a good girl,” I pant, “and make me come with your pussy on my face.” I flutter my tongue over the clit. “Now, Vale, you got me so fucking close, too.”

“Oh my god, Nash.” Her thighs shake. “Oh, my god, you’re getting off on this. On me. On eating my pussy.”

I answer by puckering my lips and sucking her clit so hard Vale screams. With a hard curl of my fingers inside her, she bucks, coming with her legs around my neck. She could break it. And I love it. Her stream of pleasure fills my mouth as I moan into her pussy, letting her cum make me do the same.

Fuck, I’ve fantasized about eating her pussy for so long.

I hold her thighs, keeping her here, with my face buried in her tangy taste, her musky smell, her pulsing release while I find mine. While I pump my swollen cock so hard into her mattress and grunt, grunting again as I feel myself spill over her sheets, my tongue barely inside her where my cock aches to be. The sound of me coming with her pussy on my face makes her shudder. She comes again, pouring more of her sweet poison over my tongue.

With panting breath, a dripping cock, and a glistening face, I leave her pussy pulsing as I climb back up her beauty until we’re nose to nose, mouth to mouth.

She stares in awe at me while I demand, “Lick your cum off my lips, Vale, and never doubt that I can make you do it again.”