Page 17

Chapter Seventeen

I want him and I’m tired of denying myself. -Flora

My arms circle Levi’s waist and I press my head against his leather-clad back as we lean into the turn. I close my eyes. There’s so much freedom in riding on the back of his motorcycle. Over the last two weeks. I’ve almost become accustomed to the vibration of the bike between my legs and the warm feeling in my gut from holding onto my Levi.

For once in my adult life, I don’t stiffen when a guy touches me. I don’t fear his arms around me. If anything, I fear that I won’t feel his touch again.

He parks the bike in front of my apartment. I swing my leg over and try to take off my helmet in a seductive way. Instead, a blonde curl snags on one of the straps and Levi has to help me out of it.

He grins down at me. I roll my eyes. My goal of being so sexy that he can no longer resist me is not working at all.

I discreetly watch his ass as we walk up the stairs to the apartment. I’ve become a pro at watching this man’s ass. I would gladly follow it anywhere.

Unfortunately, he hasn’t made a move on me at all. Is there such a thing as blue balls for a girl? Because if there is, I have it. Is it possible to die from wanting someone so much?

A few moments later, I glance across the table again at him as he methodically dips his bread into the bowl of soup and then takes a bite. I watch as his throat rhythmically moves as he swallows. Why am I mesmerized by every move of his?

I haven’t allowed him to sleep on the couch since he’s been here. I made him sleep with me and claimed old nightmares made it impossible to sleep without his presence. The truth is that I love the electricity that flows between us and the late-night talks. I love the way he kisses my forehead before he finally turns to his side and then falls asleep. Or at least pretends to. I know that most nights he lies there awake, waiting for someone to attack. The man would do anything to protect me, including sacrifice himself. I don’t doubt that.

“Do I have soup on my face? Or am I slurping? You’re watching me like a hawk.” Levi jokes.

I glance down at my plate and then giggle. “Nope, no soup stains or slurping. Just looking.”

I feel my cheeks heat. The truth is, I have no idea how to act around this gruff, yet sweet, biker, who has suddenly filled every crevice of my heart with hope. Hope that I can care about someone and even possibly have an actual relationship. I think of the tik-tok I saw earlier today. There’s a social media influencer I follow, Lola, that talks about body positivity. She’s actually a student here. I’ve never had the courage to talk to her about how her videos help me. But right now, I think of her advice. Put your big girl panties on and believe in yourself. Take a chance.

I glance up again. What if he says no? What if he really doesn’t want me?

He surprises me by reaching across the table and covering my hand with his.

His mouth cocks up into a half smile. “I like looking at you too,” he says softly.

For a few moments, we sit in silence again. I can’t stop the smile that covers my whole face, and my stomach is filled with butterflies. Is it time to end this dance of wanting to touch and denying ourselves?

I bite my lip. What if I just made a move? What if I just reached over and…

The sound of glass breaking shakes me quite abruptly out of my own thoughts.

“Get down!” Levi shouts. I duck and hear more loud pings and the sound of objects breaking around the room.

Levi is suddenly on top of me, covering my body with his own. After a few more seconds, the sound of silence reigns. What the hell just happened?