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Chapter One

“A ll I’m asking for is a chair!” Tears are building behind my eyes, making them sting, as I try to get across once again what my basic needs are. “I just want a chair, Shisek. The table isn’t any good to me without a chair.”

“Humans,” he says, flexing his long shadowy claws as he frowns. “First it was a bed. Then a couch. Now a chair?” He lets out that disapproving hiss I’ve come to despise.

“Yes! Those are all things we need!” I’m trying so hard not to cry, not to give Shisek the gratification of letting him know how much he hurts me, but it’s biting at my cheeks with a painful intensity. “I can’t eat on the couch every day.”

I don’t think I’ve been comfortable for even a moment since I moved in to do a trial marriage with Shisek. I knew he was a shadow demon, and shadow demons don’t need much in the way of furniture given how they can shift without a physical form through the world. His home is somewhere between dimensions, so it’s not easy to get furniture delivered, either.

I knew all this, but I had hoped he would try harder to accommodate me, to make his house a home for me as the trial marriage rules stipulated. But the only thing he’d had ready for me when I moved in was a bed, as if that’s all a human needs to be happy.

Now I’m starting to believe Shisek didn’t want me at all, and he’s just afraid of being lonely. He should be, given how grouchy and rude he’s been since I came here. Sometimes I think he applied for a human companion because even his own kind won’t tolerate him.

Shisek’s glowing red eyes narrow. “I can’t afford to buy so many superfluous things,” he says, his form shifting as he moves across the shadowy room.

“You should have thought of that before you applied for a human companion,” I growl back.

This isn’t the first time we’ve fought over this subject—and many other subjects, too. Probably the most painful time was when I asked if we could have sex, and Shisek told me we had “some things to work out first.”

I should have known that was the end, but I clung onto hope. I wanted this happily ever after so badly, and I wanted the freedom that Shisek gives me out in the world. He can shift into any size and shape he likes, and his great big fangs are enough to scare off any monsters who might want to hurt or eat me. It made him the perfect choice for a partner, or so I thought.

Not that we’ve gone much of anywhere. Shisek is also a homebody, which means I haven’t even been to the grocery store. He simply orders what I want and picks it up on his way home from work. I’m trapped all day in this shadow house, unable to even step out the front door unless Shisek is with me to guide me back to the physical plane.

“Yes,” Shisek finally answers. “I am coming to realize that applying for you was a mistake, Maddie.”

The words are enough to send a shock of pure fury surging through my body. My tears break free at last, and they stream down my face as I shoot up from the couch.

“Then take me back!” I want to just reach out and grab him, shake him by his collar, but he’s carefully dematerialized himself. “Take me home!”

It turns out that was all I needed to say. That night, I pack my bags and Shisek silently leads me to the entrance to the shadow realm. There, his car is waiting for us, and he drives me back to New Eden without a word.

“Good riddance,” I mutter as he pulls away, leaving me alone on the curb with my bags. But I can’t mask all my heartbreak with anger. When the car is gone, I sink down to my knees on the sidewalk and cry until one of the guards hears me. He helps me carry my things inside the high walls of the preserve, back to the place I thought I’d finally left for the last time.

Now here I am, embarrassed by my failure and trapped in a prison once more.

* * *

In the following days, I try not to let on how much it hurts that things fell apart with Shisek. I don’t want people to think I’m fragile, to know how much it aches to be sent home. I hug my parents, smiling, telling them how the breakup was mutual and amicable.

But my best friend, Celeste, must sense that everything isn’t quite as I pretend, because she comes up with all sorts of activities for us to do together. She demands that I help her with the garden during the day, and in the evenings, she invites me over to cook and play cards. I’m usually the one who insists on our little friend group hanging out, but she’s taken up the mantle of urging us all to get together and do distracting activities.

In the last few months, I’ve gotten a few new applications from monsters who are interested in me. I’ve ignored them, but tonight Celeste insisted that we sit down at the table together to shuffle through them, looking for the one who could be my perfect match.

I have very low hopes.

“What about this guy?” she asks, sliding over an application. The picture attached to it features a centaur, big and beefy in the shoulders and chest, with a handsome face and a gorgeous, dapple grey coat on his lower half. He’s beautiful, I have to admit, and is probably hung like a... well, like a horse.

“How does that work?” I ask, cocking my head at the photograph. “Does he mount me?” I try to imagine this, and I wonder if it would even fit.

Celeste furrows her brow. “I don’t know. It does seem like it might be complicated.”

I push the application away and drop my head down on the table. It’s not really about the sex—though that is very important to me. It’s the idea of offering my heart again that haunts me, hoping that some centaur won’t stomp on it the way Shisek did.

I was so thrilled the day I packed up my things, absolutely sure that this was my chance to find my happily ever after. And maybe the problem is that I was too eager, too blinded by my rose-colored glasses to see the truth about Shisek. Because truly, I hate it here in New Eden. There aren’t many humans left in the world, and those that are? We’re trapped behind these high walls to keep us safe from monsters that roam the world outside. It’s a boring existence. There’s so much out there in the world to do and see, and I could never see it unless I left.

So I was willing to overlook the red flags if it meant freedom.

Celeste pats my back. “What’s really wrong?” she asks. “There’s something bothering you.”

It’s hard to hide from my best friend, who knows me better than even my own mother. My parents haven’t asked more than a couple of questions since I came back, but Celeste seems to have sussed out what I’m hiding.

The tears come to my eyes before I can stop them.

“What if no one wants me?” I ask, wiping my face. “What if I never get chosen by someone who I want to choose, too?” I push all the applications away, scattering them across the ground.

Maybe I’m too much. Maybe I’m too energetic, or demanding, or needy. Maybe Shisek was my best chance at love and I blew it by asking for that chair.

Celeste gasps. “Maddie!” She scoots her chair closer and wraps me up in a hug. “All of these monsters want you. They wouldn’t have applied for you otherwise.”

“But I don’t want any of them!” My tears are flowing faster now. “I can’t end up with another Shisek. It would break me, Celeste.”

Sometimes when it’s dark, I think no one will ever love me the way I want to be loved. I want freedom as much as I want companionship. I want to experience something as average and normal as grocery shopping. I want to make love, and have meals together, and cuddle up on the couch for a silly TV show with my companion in life.

Celeste wipes my cheek with her thumb. “You won’t end up with another Shisek. You know what warning signs to look for now, and you know what you want. You just have to be a little patient until the right one comes along.”

“I guess so,” I say, sniffling. “But I’m tired of waiting.”

She nods. “I know. You want to be swept off your feet. And you deserve that.”

When I’ve cooled off a little, I notice there’s just one application left on the table after my tantrum.

NAME: EGORR

There’s no last name—just “Egorr.”

SPECIES: OGRE

I’ve never had an ogre apply for me before. His photo is... unusual. He’s almost too big for the camera to capture, with a huge green body, and a big round head. He has no hair, and massive tusks protrude from his lower jaw, nearly curling up to his brows.

At first, I think he’s the opposite of handsome with that squashed-looking nose and small eyes. But something in his smile, which looks awkward and a little forced, speaks to me. It’s like he’s holding in what he really is and putting on the face he thinks I would want.

I’m curious what’s behind that smile.

An ogre would certainly keep me safe out in the world, being eight feet tall and bigger than most other monsters we might encounter, save for giants. Immediately I think of how big his cock must be, and my eyes go wide.

“Maddie?” Celeste asks, her gaze following mine to the application. She quirks an eyebrow. “An ogre?”

I trace his smile in the photograph before realizing I should probably read the rest of the application.

OCCUPATION: SOFTWARE DEVELOPER

An ogre who programs computers? Huh. I don’t know why I expected him to be a lumberjack, or maybe a pro weightlifter. I read further on.

“My life is pretty quiet,” his personal statement reads. “I want to share it with someone who I can come home to every day. I have a lot of love to give, and I just haven’t been able to find the person I want to give it to.”

My heart twists in my chest. I know just what he means. I have so much devotion inside me, so much desire and longing, and nowhere for it to go. I want someone who has just as much to offer me in return. I want to love and feel loved completely.

“What do you think?” asks Celeste. “Can you give it another try with someone else?”

The more I look at the picture, the more I can imagine Egorr being handsome. With just that tiny glimpse of what he is inside, I could see myself being attracted to him, huge tusks and all.

Maybe Celeste is right, and I can’t judge Egorr based on Shisek. This ogre is a whole separate, different person, and there’s a chance he could be just what I’m looking for.

I check through the rest of the application, which contains all the notes from the resident director during the vetting process. She’s written down things like, “Very considerate,” “a little forgetful,” and “already has plans for decorating Maddie’s bedroom.”

My heart swells just the smallest amount. An ogre certainly has furniture already, so that’s a plus. And I have a fantastic memory, so we should complement each other well.

“All right,” I say with a sigh. “I’ll ask him to meet.”

“Good.” Celeste’s smile is radiant and encouraging. “I think you’re brave to try again.”

I swat away her compliment. “Now I just have to figure out what to wear!”