Page 31 of Muse (The Forbidden Hearts #1)

THEO

W hat the fuck was I thinking, letting her in here.

I pace the living room like a caged animal, my phone gripped tight in my hand, carving a path into the carpet.

Every missed call, every ignored text burns through me like acid.

It’s almost four in the morning, and I’ve gotten zero sleep, every hour without her answer pulling tighter around my neck like a noose.

When I opened the front door and found Evelyn standing there, I'd been shocked.

Caught off guard in a way I should have known better than to let happen.

I hadn't seen her since the night at the gallery, and it had been even longer since I'd actually thought about her.

Whatever there was between us, if there had ever been anything real at all, had burned out a long time ago.

But Evelyn had always had a way of inserting herself where she didn’t belong.

Always lingering around me, always pulling me back, just when I thought I’d finally gotten free.

We never had a true relationship, not really.

It was convenient, almost an expectation.

Everyone around us acted like we were inevitable, two pieces of a puzzle that fit together just because they’d been forced side by side for too long.

Behind closed doors, it was hollow. Empty.

She cared more about how we looked than how we actually lived.

The curated photos, the choreographed smiles, the endless need to prove something to a world that didn’t give a shit.

It was exhausting. She was exhausting. And I stayed longer than I should have, mistaking comfort for connection because I didn’t know there could be anything more.

Not until Sophie.

I drop onto the edge of the couch, pressing my fists into my thighs, trying to find some anchor in the spinning mess inside my head.

Sophie changed everything. She cracked me open without even trying, walked into my life with that fire in her eyes and that stubborn tilt to her chin and made me realize how fucking small I’d been living. She made me want things. Real things.

And now, thanks to Evelyn's bullshit and my own fucking stupidity, Sophie thinks I betrayed her.

I can’t blame her.

If I walked in and saw her alone with her ex, wine glasses between them, laughing like no time had passed, I’d lose my mind too. I’d assume the worst. God knows I’m assuming the worst about myself right now.

I bury my face in my hands, breathing hard. My heart physically aching in my chest.

I’m about three seconds away from doing something reckless, like driving to her house, climbing through her window, and begging her to listen. Dropping to my knees on her front lawn if that’s what it takes. Anything, anything at all to make her understand what she saw wasn’t what it looked like.

But I know better.

Pushing her now will likely only shove her further away. I have to give her space, even if it’s killing me to do it. I have to trust that what we have is strong enough to survive this. Even though every minute that passes without hearing her voice feels like one step closer to losing her forever.

I push up from the couch and start pacing again, running my hand through my hair until my scalp stings. If Eve ruined this for me, I’ll never forgive her. Hell, I’ll never forgive myself.

Her excuse was laughable. She “didn’t know” I was seeing anyone.

Apparently she was “in the neighborhood and just wanted to catch up.” Right.

That’s why she barged into my house like she still had a right to be here, poured herself a drink, and made herself comfortable on my couch like no time had passed.

I hadn't touched my wine. I hadn't even sat near her, staying stiff, cold, and as far away as humanly possible while I waited for her damn Uber to show up. She’d already had too much to drink, her words slurring slightly, the flush in her cheeks too obvious to miss. I didn’t want her here, didn’t want to give her a second of my time, but I also couldn’t in good conscience let her drive herself home and risk killing someone else.

So I sat and waited. I kept my distance.

And Sophie walked in right before it could end. Right before I could kick Evelyn out for good. But Sophie didn’t see that. How could she have?

All she saw was our history, the worst kind of history, right there in front of her. A history that I should have slammed the door on harder.

God, her face when our eyes met through the window. I think that image will haunt me for the rest of my life .

I stop pacing, staring blankly at the dark screen of my phone.

The silence presses down harder, suffocating, heavy with everything I want to say but can’t find the right words for.

Everything we were building, everything I was too afraid to admit out loud, slipping further away with every second she stays silent.

The truth is, Sophie isn’t just some girl I hooked up with, some passing fling to kill time until something easier came along.

She’s it.

She’s the fucking sun and I’m just a man stupid enough to think I could keep orbiting her without burning up completely.

I want everything with her. The messy mornings, the late nights tangled in each other. The fights and the forgiveness. The life together I’d begun to imagine we could someday have. One I never even knew I wanted until she made me believe I could have it.

And now, I might have lost it all.

I sink back down onto the couch, exhaustion crashing over me like a wave, but I know sleep isn’t coming. Not tonight. Maybe not ever if she doesn’t forgive me.

I don’t just want her back. I need her back.

Because this isn’t just about love anymore. It’s pure survival.

Sophie is the only thing that makes me want to be better. The only thing that makes me believe there’s still something in life worth fighting for. And I’ll fight for her, even if it’s the last thing I do.