Page 76 of Mr. Infuriating (Mister #1)

Gretchen

I could feel Gabe pulling away after he’d watched me with Michelle and Lucy. There were no more stolen looks or discreet touches as we sat next to each other. In fact, he hardly looked at me the rest of the time at the bowling alley.

I’d thought maybe I’d take my mother’s advice and talk to him tonight when we were alone. But there was no way I was doing that now. It was obvious he hadn’t changed his mind. Especially when I’d said I was going to sleep in the guest room, since Brayden was also staying over, and he didn’t argue.

I cried myself to sleep. The writing was on the wall.

He still made those goddamn pancakes in the morning, though. Much to Jake’s delight.

The kicker came later that afternoon as I was getting ready to leave school.

Gabe: Hey! Good news! The part for your sink came in early. Your water is officially back on.

I wondered how many strings he had to pull to get that part early and get me out of his house.

Me: That is good news. If it’s okay with you, I’m going to swing by your place and get all our stuff before I pick up Jake.

Gabe: I’ll come help you.

I wanted to tell him I could handle it, but then realized he was more than likely coming to officially end things without Jake being around. That was probably smart .

Me: Okay, I’ll be headed that way shortly.

~~

Gabe’s truck was in the drive when I pulled in. My legs felt like they were filled with cement as I walked up the front steps, and I wiped my palms on my pants before opening the door.

Jake’s booster seat was already by the door, along with a bag with some of his toys in it.

Gee, talk about here’s your hat. What’s your hurry ?

I found Gabe sitting at the kitchen island, staring at his phone.

“Hey,” I called from the doorway. Nodding toward the stairs, I told him, “I’m just going to finish packing. I see you’ve already gathered his toys and stuff from the downstairs.”

“I’ll check the basement while you do that.”

Yes, you wouldn’t want me to leave anything behind that you might have to get in touch with me about in the future.

“Sounds good. Thanks.”

I willed myself not to cry when I walked in the guest room, but the finality of us leaving, and subsequently Gabe and I being over, was too much. The first tear soon gave way to a second. Then a third.

I heard him coming up the stairs, and quickly swiped at my face, but the tears kept coming anyway. Careful to keep my back to the door, I finished gathering my clothes and stuffed them in my suitcase.

His deep voice came from the threshold. “Need any help?”

Refusing to look up when I opened Jake’s racecar suitcase, I tried to keep my tone cheerful .

“Almost done!”

He was quiet as he watched me from the doorway. I could see in my peripheral vision that he was leaning against the door jamb. Still, I wouldn’t glance his way, for fear that I’d break into ugly sobs if I met his eyes.

No one wanted to see my ugly sobs. Not even me.

I was more careful with Jake’s clothes than I’d been with mine, since Gabe’s housekeeper had gone to the trouble of washing and folding them for me.

(Talk about a luxury! It had become my goal in life to make enough money to hire a housekeeper.)

It didn’t take long to pack Jake’s things, and soon all that was left were my toiletries in the bathroom.

Which meant I was going to have to go past him.

I refolded a few of Jake’s shirts to stall for time, until it was painfully obvious there was nothing left for me to do.

With forced levity in my tone I proclaimed, “I just need to get my stuff from the bathroom!”

As I walked past him, he reached for my elbow. The contact felt like electricity pulsing through my veins.

“Can we talk for a minute?”

Oh god, not “the talk”.

I tried to act unaffected.

“Yeah, sure.”

He took my hand and led me to the edge of the bed, where we sat down at the same time. I kept my hands in my lap and stared at a chip in my nail polish on my index finger as I waited for him to start.

“You are such an amazing woman… ”

The minute I heard the words, my ire went through the roof, and I snapped, “Oh, not this speech again!”

He looked taken aback at my outburst.

“What do you mean?”

“You handed me this bullshit the last time you rejected me.”

“I’m not rejecting you. We had an agreement that this thing between us was just until your cabinets were finished. And, well, minus a few little things I can probably take care of tomorrow, they’re done.”

“ They’re done ?”

“Yeah, I told you it wouldn’t take me that long. I was able to work on them last week and Beau helped me again on Saturday while you were at your parents.”

“You said it would take a month, and you finished in a week?”

God, I felt like an idiot. Here I was thinking he’d take his time to draw this out. When in reality, he was really hurrying to get it done so this would be over, and he could move on.

“Technically, it was ten days. And I always tell people longer so they’re pleasantly surprised when I’m done sooner than they expected.”

My voice dripped with derision. “Lucky me.”

“Look, I know you’re hurt right now, but I promise you, one day when you’re happily married again, holding your new baby, you’ll be glad we stuck to our agreement to end things.”

“I don’t understand, Gabe. I know you care about me. Why are you doing this? ”

I hated the desperation in my voice. Back in college, I swore I’d never beg a man to be with me, and so far, I never had—not even Troy, but I was bordering on it with Gabe.

“Sweetheart…” he took a deep breath then gave me a sad smile.

“I do care about you. I care enough about you to let you go because I can’t give you what you want.

It took me a long time to come to terms with the fact that I wasn’t going to have more kids, and now that I have…

well, the idea of bringing another child into this world terrifies me.

I just couldn’t do it. And that’s not fair to you.

The longer we’re together, the harder it’s going to hurt. ”

I felt my spine stiffen.

“Oh, so this is all for my benefit?”

“You’re not the only one getting hurt in this.”

That took the wind out of my sails.

“Right, the kids.”

I hated that he threw my words from the other night back at me.

“This hurts me, too, darlin’.”

So don’t do it!

But even as I thought it, I knew he was right. I would thank him some day.

Just not today.

I grabbed his hand and squeezed.

“Me, too.”

~~

I finished packing my toiletries, and he walked me to the door .

I wanted to make a dramatic exit, but it was somewhat hindered when I tried to maneuver the suitcases, booster seat, and bag of toys.

Gabe took the booster seat from me, then reached for the suitcase handles.

“Let me help you.”

And that’s all it took to make me start crying again.

****

Gabe

The night before, I’d laid in bed staring at the ceiling, unable to sleep. Gretchen was back under my roof, so that brought me some comfort. But she wasn’t in my bed, hence the reason I’d been wide awake at three a.m.

I knew letting her go was the right thing to do, but my heart wasn’t happy about it.

No, more than my heart wasn’t happy. My soul felt like it was being crushed into a million pieces.

Still, it’d seemed like a sign that I was making the right decision when Henry called to tell me he’d got the part that morning and could be at Gretchen’s house later that day.

Now as she stood in front of me outside her car with tears streaming down her face, I didn’t know what the right thing to do was. Was I making a mistake?

I wiped her tears with my thumbs and whispered, “I’m sorry, sweetheart. You have no idea how sorry.”

She offered me a weak smile through watery eyes, and I repeated myself. “One day you’ll see we made the right decision. ”

When she was with someone new.

I hated the idea more than I could even express.

I found myself continuing, “And I know you probably don’t want to be friends, but I’m hoping we can at least be friend ly when you’re tutoring Brayden. And I’d love to be able to see Jake every now and then.”

“Of course we can be friendly.”

“Can I take you and Jake to dinner tonight?”

“I don’t think that’s a good idea, do you?”

“I mean, I don’t want to just disappear on him.”

That’d been another thing that had kept me up last night. The idea of Jake thinking I bailed on him really bothered me.

“Kids are resilient. He’ll be okay.”

“That’s not what you said the other day.”

She stared up at me with those big blue eyes that had mesmerized me from the start.

“What other choice is there, Gabe?” She pulled her neck back as she searched my eyes. “Have you changed your mind about having a baby?”

“No.”

She gave me a sad smile. “Neither have I.”

I guess this is it then.

Neither of us said it, but it hung in the air like a dark cloud over us.

I opened my arms, and she stepped into my embrace. As I held her tight, I tried to memorize everything about the moment. How perfectly her body fit against mine, the scent of her shampoo, how soft her hair was when I laid my cheek on top of her head .

I never wanted the hug to end. Maybe she didn’t either, because she wasn’t in a hurry to step away.

Finally, she released her hold on me and murmured, “I have to pick up Jake from daycare, or they’ll charge me a late fee.”

I stepped back and nodded.

“I can come by tomorrow and make the finishing touches on the cabinets.”

“Why don’t you wait until Wednesday’s tutoring session with Brayden.”

“Is it okay if Britt comes, too?”

“I was hoping you’d suggest that.”

I couldn’t resist kissing her forehead, then opened her car door for her.

“Take care, sweetheart.”

She slid behind the wheel.

“You, too.”

I closed her door, then she was gone. And she’d taken my heart with her.