Page 12 of Maxim (The Syndicates #12)

M y head hurts.

That’s the first thought that I can grasp as I slowly blink away.

I feel like I went ten rounds with a boxer. Why do I feel so bad?

I try to piece together the last thing I can remember, but my brain is fuzzy. Am I at home? If I am, what is wrong with me?

“Daryna,” I call out, my eyes trying to blink open.

The light is so bright. I can’t focus on anything. I feel like I might throw up.

Oh god, I’m dying.

I try to focus on the ceiling, but I can’t.

My eyes fall back closed.

“Daryna. Alek,” I mumble, losing the little bit of energy I had.

“Shh. You’re okay. You need to rest. I’ll be right here. I’ll protect you. I promise.”

The voice seems familiar, but I can’t place it. I’m too sleepy to even try.

Instead, I let the feeling of safety his words provide wash over me. Slowly, I let myself drift off into the unknown.

Waking up slowly, I feel lethargic.

What happened to me?

Blinking my eyes open slowly, I recognize the ceiling. That’s when it hits me.

I’m not dead. There’s no way this is the afterlife.

I survived.

I groan, trying to push up on my arms, but I’m weak and fall back to the bed.

“Let me help you.”

I turn to find Maxim at my side. He picks me up, helping me sit up. He even goes as far as readjusting my pillows.

“What happened? Why am I still here?”

He winces at my words. “You’re okay now. Everything is going to be okay.”

Tears fill my eyes. “I don’t want everything to be okay. I wanted to be gone. I can’t keep living like this.”

He grows silent. “I’m sorry for my part in making you want to kill yourself. It was never my intention. I’ve done everything I have to protect you. I see now that I have failed.”

Guilt settles into my stomach. How ironic? I feel guilty for making the man who bought me feel bad for failing me.

I swear life can’t get any stranger than this.

Still, I feel bad. I never wanted this to affect Maxim.

“This was never about you. I don’t want to live anymore. How did you even save me?”

“I came home and heard you in the bath. When you had been in there for a while, I came to check on you.” His eyes start tearing up as he looks at me. “I thought I lost you.”

“Why do you even care?” I spit at him.

It’s cruel. The man is obviously traumatized by what I did, but I can’t help it. I don’t trust him.

“I’m not the man you think I am. I’m not here to hurt anyone. All I want to do is to stop all the pain and suffering. Can’t you see that?”

“Well then, maybe you shouldn’t be going out and buying women. That sends mixed signals.”

“Do you think I wanted to buy you? I never wanted to buy anyone, but you showed up on that stage and I couldn’t let them hurt you. I had to buy you to protect you. Don’t you get that? I bent the rules because of you.”

I don’t understand what he is talking about, but I don’t care. I can’t. If I do, I might just find a reason to live. Unless my siblings are with me, I don’t want that.

“It doesn’t matter. I need to be with my siblings. I don’t think you understand what it is like to live in that house with that man. You bought me and left them unprotected. You say you want to help? Help them. Go get them. Bring them here. Then I will be happy.”

He shakes his head as he sniffles, wiping his eyes. “We both know I can’t do that. Your father would never stop looking for them or us. We would never be safe. I want to save them, but it will take time. I will need your trust.”

“How am I supposed to trust you? You buy me, then lock me up like Rapunzel. This isn’t right. My life has never been right. All I want is to be with my siblings. Why can’t you understand that?”

“I understand it completely, but there is nothing I can do. You can sit here and throw your fit. You can throw things or hit me. You can do anything except end your life. I refuse to allow you to take light from this world. Because you are, Olena. Сонечко The light in the darkness. I see that now. I will be better. I will care for you better. I will push harder to get the mission complete, then I will bring your siblings to you.”

“Don’t say empty words. Nothing short of having my siblings in my arms will make me believe you.”

“I know, and I don’t expect you to. It will take time, which I know we don’t have a lot of.

It doesn’t matter if you believe me or not.

I will be doing everything I can to rescue your siblings.

The real question is, are you willing to stay alive long enough to greet them when I do?

I have to be honest with you, if I save them and they have no one to come to, then what am I saving them from to run to? Foster care?”

I get what he is saying. I don’t like it, but I understand it.

Signing, I nod. “I will stay alive. I won’t try to off myself again. You save them, though, and prove me wrong. I want to believe you, Maxim. I don’t know how, though. Show me how.”

He nods. “I won’t fail you again, Olena. I’ll go get you some food. You rest.”

As he walks out of the room, I wonder if I just made a deal with the devil.

If I did, and he brings me my siblings, it will be well worth it.

I don’t like leaving her alone, but she needs to eat. Her nutrition is more important now than it has ever been. Losing so much blood is a serious medical event. One that needs specific care and attention. Not only physically, but mentally.

I will be there for both.

Going to the kitchen, I pull out some ingredients to make a quick sandwich.

Olena hates me, but I don’t blame her. I should have been a better caretaker. I should have made sure she was okay. I spent too much time away, ashamed of what I did to get her here. I felt even worse when I had to chain her.

I really didn’t want to, but I was out of options. If she had escaped again, it not only threatened my position with her father, but it also threatened her life. I have no doubts that he would kill her on sight if he saw her again.

I thought I was doing what was right, but the truth is I am losing sight of right from wrong. I have made so many exceptions to my rules that I don’t even know if I have any left. How can someone allow themselves to dive into the darkness the way I have and still think they can find their way out?

Olena.

Сонечко.

That’s how I find my way out. I focus on her.

She wants her siblings? I’ll get them back. It won’t happen overnight. I will have to do some unspeakable things to get there, but I’ll do it.

When it gets too hard. When I think that I can’t keep going. When I want to quit. That’s when I will come to Olena. I will remember the way she looked when she was lifeless in that tub. That will be my motivation to keep going. I will do it for her.

Finishing up her sandwich, I fill a glass of water and put both on a tray. Then I bring it back to the room.

I find her sitting up in the same position I left her in as she stares at the wall.

“You need to eat. You lost a lot of blood.”

“How did you save me anyway?” she asks.

“I tied your arms to stop the bleeding. Then I pulled you out and took you to my car. I drove you to a doctor I know. He did the hard part of patching you up.”

“You didn’t have to do that. You could have let me go.”

“No. I couldn’t have,” I tell her.

“Why not?” she asks.

“You don’t get it. You represent everything I am working toward. You run inside of my veins as much as I do yours now.”

I feel the need to spill everything to her. To tell her my whole mission. I want to trust her. Make her understand. I need her to understand me.

“What is that supposed to mean?”

I let out a sigh. “When you were on the table, they needed blood. They were going to get a donor, but I’m a universal donor. I told them to take my blood.”

She pauses, the sandwich halfway to her mouth as she looks at me.

“You gave me your blood?”

I nod. “Let’s just say I am invested in keeping you alive. Not because of anything sinister. I want you to lead a happy and full life. You will. One day you will.”

She gives me a curt nod before bringing the sandwich to her mouth. I watch as she takes the first bite.

“This is good. Thank you,” she says politely.

“Of course. If you are still hungry when you are done, I can make you more. Or something different. I have medicine you need to take too. We will nurse you back to health,” I tell her.

“Don’t you have to be places? You were never here before,” she says.

“I know. I stayed away because I thought it would be best for you. I do have places to be, but they can wait. I want you to feel better before I leave.”

She shakes her head. “I don’t need a babysitter. I already promised to not kill myself again.”

I swallow hard. I want to believe her, but I don’t. Suicide is no joke. I can’t trust the words she says when her actions spoke loud and clear. She does not want to be alive.

She will, though.

“That’s not why.” At least not the only reason. “Seeing you like that scared me. I won’t be able to concentrate until I know you are okay.”

“Okay,” she whispers.

I let her finish her sandwich in silence. When she finishes, she tries to move again but winces.

“How can I help?” I ask.

“I have to go to the bathroom.”

I nod. “Let me help you stand.”

I move to her side of the bed, pulling her to her feet. Once she is steady, I watch her walk into the bathroom. The door closing gives me a bit of a panic, but after a few moments she comes back out.

“Here, take your medicine,” I tell her, taking two bottles of pills and shaking out one of each.

I hand her the pills, then the water. She takes them without question. Then I help settle her back into bed.

“Do you need anything else?” I ask.

“Just some peace and quiet.”

“Ask and you shall receive. I’ll be in the other room.”

She nods, already falling asleep.

I grab the plate, leaving the glass in case she needs a drink. Closing the door softly behind me, I head into the kitchen. I wash her plate and put it up before going into the living room.

The urge to check on her is too strong, so instead of watching television, I head back to the bedroom.

My heart settles when I see her resting peacefully.

Quietly, I climb into bed next to her on top of the covers. I only mean to lie there for a minute, but soon my eyes grow droopy.

As I drift off to sleep, the last thing I think is that Olena is going to kill me when she wakes up.

It’ll be worth it, though.