Page 54

Lilith

I hear a noise behind me, and I don’t care to look until Daemon nudges me. “Incoming,” he says, chuckling.

I turn in time for Thuly to crash into me. Daemon catches us as he tackles me to the ground and licks my face. “I missed you too, buddy,” I say as I hug him. He relaxes into my arms and purrs softly.

“I think he loves you,” Kael says.

“Where did you come from?” I ask. He hops up off of me, and Callum helps me up. Thuly then turns his love on the guys and nudges them until they lean down and give him scratches.

“You’ve gotten bigger,” Daemon says to Thuly as he chitters.

“Lilith,” Kael says, pointing behind me. I turn and see my family jogging toward us. I take off running toward them and go straight to my sister. By the time we crash into one another, we are both crying.

“Thank the gods, you’re okay,” she says tearfully, taking my face between her hands.

“I’m okay, Leli,” I say, sniffing back my own tears. “They’re dead. I did it for us.”

“Oh, Lilith,” she says, pulling me into another hug.

“I gave them what they deserved,” I whispered. “I gave them every bit of pain they gave us. They can’t hurt us again.”

“Thank you,” she says. “Gods, I’m glad you’re okay.”

“Can you do me a favor?” I whisper softly in her ear when I see that everyone else is talking to the guys while Leli and I have our moment.

“What’s up?” she answers softly.

“That woman over there… Take her and put her in a cell. The collar stays on, but no one can know that she’s there. You can tell Vash, but I don’t want anyone asking questions until I find out more. Okay?”

“Okay,” she smiles and nods. “I’ll take care of it and let you know where she is.”

“Thanks,” I say before turning to Dad.

“Hey, baby girl,” he says as he wraps me in a hug.

“I did it,” I say as I hug him back.

“I see that,” he says. “You blew up a whole building.”

“I got a hold on my magia,” I say as I pull away to look at him.

“I’m proud of you, Lilith,” he says, wiping away my tears. “I am so proud of you.”

Striker hugs me next and squeezes me tight. “Remind me not to piss you off,” he laughs.

“Hey. I’m nice,” I say.

“Baby. You just raped two men to death with magic vines. Nice isn’t the word I’d use,” Kael teases.

“I’m sorry?” Dad asks. “You did what?”

“Technically they died of a broken neck,” I shrug and step over to Volis. He seems reluctant to come toward me, so I narrow my eyes at him, and he smiles softly.

“Hey,” he says as he hugs me.

“Hey. I missed you,” I say happily. Emotion sweeps over him, and he sniffs back tears. I look at Striker confused as he hugs me. Striker smiles softly but doesn’t give me any hints as to what is wrong.

“What’s wrong?” I ask, pulling away to look at him. “Is Kira okay? What happened?”

“She’s fine,” he says. “Lilith, I’m sorry. I’m so fucking sorry.”

“For what, Volis?” I ask, confused.

“I knew and didn’t tell you. If I had told you, you never would have gotten taken,” he says tearfully.

“Knew what?” I ask.

“Fermin. I knew he betrayed you. I assumed you knew and didn’t tell you. You went with Fermin, and he took you straight to them. I’m the reason you ended up with…”

“Stop it,” I say, cutting him off. “Stop blaming yourself. Stop torturing yourself. The only ones to blame are Fermin, Zypher, and Morwen. Two of the three are very much dead.”

“I should have told you,” he says again.

“Fine. So it’s your fault. How should I punish you? Hmm? Public hanging or guillotine?” I ask, and Striker laughs. “Come on. Pick. If it’s your fault, tell me how you should be punished?”

“You’re a brat,” he says instead of answering.

“And I’m also right,” I say. “You are not to blame because someone else betrayed me. Where is that scumbag anyway?”

“Leli healed him. He’s in jail with around-the-clock security,” Dad says.

“You raped them with vines?” Volis asks. “Where did you get the vines?”

“That also had like two-inch thorns,” I laugh. “I think it was my magia. They were, like, attracted to me. I’ll explain when we get home.”

“You want to make the drive all the way home tonight?” Daemon asks.

“Really, I just want a shower and a bed. But I’d prefer it be my shower and bed,” I say.

“Do you guys want to come with us?” Kael asks.

“Uh. Yeah,” Leli says with a frown. “You’re stuck with me.”

“At least Vash will be there.” Leli slaps Daemon’s arms suddenly, and I laugh.

“Ow! What was that for, twerp?” Daemon laughs.

“Vash had a maiden, and you knew, didn’t you?” she asks.

“No, I didn’t know,” he says. “I promise.”

“Well… okay,” she sighs and pats his arm where she just smacked him.

“How is everything?” I ask.

“Everything is okay,” Leli says. “The wolves are causing some problems, but the new rep is handling things.”

“Peace won’t happen overnight,” I say.

“Let’s go home,” Kael says, cupping my cheek.

“You guys go ahead,” Leli says. “Vash and I will hang back a second and make sure everything is okay. The explosion will draw people out.

“Okay,” I smile. “Come see us when you’re done? I’d like to tell you all what happened. Keeping all of that in isn’t a good idea for me to do.”

“Yeah. We won’t be long,” Vash says with a smile. I assume that Leli has already used their mind link to tell him what I asked her to do. Only Vash and Leli can see Mom, so I’m confident everything will go okay.

I feel hands on my shoulders, and it makes my eyes fly open. I scream and hit whoever is touching me. My brain is stuck in that concrete room, so the only thing I can imagine is Zypher having survived the explosion and the vines. For a split second, I think I’m about to be dragged back to that room.

“Woah. Hey. It’s just me. You’re okay,” Daemon says, hugging me.

“I’m sorry,” I say softly.

“What happened?” Dad asks.

“I thought it was him for a second,” I admit, pulling away from Daemon so Dad can help me out of the truck. I may have healed myself, but I’m still exhausted. Using all of that magia has worn me out.

“He’s dead, sweetie. They both are,” he says, cupping my cheek. “Leli and Vash found their bodies. They’re being cremated right now. They should be here soon.”

“Leli has a lead foot,” Volis says. “They’ll be here in no time.”

“But they’re gone? No chance…” I start to say.

“No. They’re definitely dead,” Dad laughs. “I’m strangely excited to know what you did to them.”

“Let’s go inside,” Callum says, taking my hand.

We all walk inside, and I nearly get tackled by a hug when Freya sees me. “Oh, my Gods. You’re okay,” she says, hugging me. She moves to the guys and hugs them next. “I was so worried.”

“We’re okay,” Daemon says softly. She smiles and turns to her sister.

“It’s so good to see you,” Brenna says as they hug.

“Mated to Maz?” Freya asks her sister with a grin.

“Yeah,” Brenna says with a soft smile.

“Do you want to go shower now or wait until everyone leaves?” Kael asks me.

“If I go upstairs and shower, I’m staying up there. It’s best I just wait so we can talk to everyone,” I say with a heavy sigh.

“You okay?” he asks, cupping my face with both of his hands. “Are you feeling okay?”

“I’m just tired,” I say. “Loss of adrenaline, maybe.”

“You were using a lot of magia for an extended period,” Dad says. “It’s draining.”

“Draining like…” Daemon starts to ask.

“No, no. Just exhausting,” he answers. “She’s not at risk or anything. She just needs to get something to eat and sleep for a while.”

Daemon sits on the couch and pulls me into his lap. I curl up against his chest and close my eyes as he holds me close. I focus on his breathing rather than being surrounded by people.

Being isolated from everyone for a week has made me anxious to be around others, apparently. I know it will take some time. I need to pull myself out of that mindset of being kidnapped. I am free and they are dead. They are no longer a threat to me. I am the High Witch and the Queen of Grimitara. No one can hurt me again. Not like that, anyway.

Nothing will ever match the abuse Zypher and Morwen put me through. The fact they got my own mates to hurt me like that… I know it was an attempt at making me reject my mates. They thought I was weak-minded and easily susceptible to manipulation. Maybe I was that person for the majority of my life, but the moment I saw the Three Kings for the first time… All of that changed. Even when I feared they would kill me, I knew my life was going to drastically change. I wouldn’t have guessed that I would be so madly in love with these three. I never would have predicted that I would be so comfortable with another being that I would curl up in their lap to rest, knowing I was safe.

The entire week that I was deprived of their comfort was hell. That was the worst part overall, and Zypher knew it. He may have never found his mate, but he sure as hell understood how torturous it would be to not have them close. He knew the worst way to hurt me would be to try and have me turn on them or them turn on me. When things weren’t going the way he wanted, he had a witch force them to rape me.

I struggle to call it rape because it’s not as simple as that. Daemon didn’t rape me. Callum and Kael didn’t rape me. That witch… she did. I won’t even say it’s my mother because the woman I see in my dreams wouldn’t do that. She would burn this world for her daughter, but that witch… Who knows what else she is capable of? With that collar on, she seems to be utterly useless, though.

“Leli is here,” Striker says when he opens the front door. I sit up in Daemon’s lap and see that Kael and Callum are sitting with us.

“Hey,” Leli says.

“Hey,” Dad says. “Everything good?”

“Yeah. Right after you all left, a bunch of people ended up outside. Vash and I decided to see if we could find their bodies. You really fucked them up,” Leli says to me.

“Yeah,” I laugh.

“They were under some metal table with a few chunks of concrete on top of it,” Vash says.

“That fucking table,” I say, rolling my eyes.

“Although I would love to hear everything right now, you four need to do a broadcast,” Leli says.

“Right now?” Daemon asks.

“Yeah. When we found their bodies, everyone automatically assumed you four were found also. Shit will hit the fan if they think their leaders were killed.”

“Fuck,” Kael sighs.

“I should probably put pants on,” I say, and Kael chuckles.

“I’ll go up and get you something to put on,” Leli says to me. “I’d advise you not to look too presentable. You were held hostage for a week and are now going straight to reassure the country that you are safe. That should show.”

“Right,” I say.

“I can get things set up if you guys want to come with me. We can go out on the patio,” Vash says.

We all go out on the patio. I sit down and the sun is starting to set. The last of the light is shining on me. I close my eyes and soak it up. I feel more relaxed being away from everyone.

“Here you go,” Leli says, handing me a pair of leggings. Kael takes them from her before kneeling and putting them on my legs. When I stand, he helps pull them up.

“Ready?” Vash asks.

“No,” I sigh. “But I need to so I can eat and lie down.”

“Striker just left to get you guys some pizza,” Leli says.

“Bless him,” I laugh. “Let’s do this.”

“Okay. I think for the broadcast, Lilith should be sitting with the guys standing behind her,” Vash says.

“Why?” I ask.

“With you sitting, it will imply what you went through is worthy of rest while the guys standing will show they are protective of you. It also is them putting you first,” Vash explains.

“Makes sense,” I shrug. “What do I say?”

“Right now, just say that you are safe, and you need time to rest and recover from the ordeal,” Vash says. “Promise to go into more detail at a later date. Also, confirm they are dead and no longer a threat.”

“Okay,” I sigh and sit back down.

“I’ll give you a signal when we are live. Just look at the camera,” he says as he types on the laptop. I take a deep breath and center my thoughts. Vash gives me a thumbs up, and I talk to the country.

“Hello, citizens of Grimitara. The kings and I wanted to take a moment to let everyone know that we are safe and resting at home. I know there has been a lot going on, especially in the last week. I know you all want answers, and we want to give them to you. Right now, we must take the time to rest and heal from everything that happened in the last week. In the next few days, we will go to City Hall for an official press conference to further explain as well as to answer questions. I encourage more than just the press to come see us. No matter your species, you are welcome to come hear our story. I also…” I stop when a wave of emotion hits me. Daemon leans down to whisper to me.

“Take a deep breath. You’re doing great,” he whispers. I look at him and smile before looking back at the camera.

“I will confirm that the bodies of Zypher Fallins and Brion Morwen were recovered in the wreckage of an abandoned building in Estroria after an explosion. They were deceased upon arrival. We appreciate your concerns and well wishes. We will have a member of the council update everyone when we plan on coming into public again. In the meantime, the council will still be managing things in our absence. Thank you, and have a good evening.”

I exhale a shaky breath and sit back when Vash gives me another thumbs-up. “You did well,” Vash says with a smile.

“I look like trash,” I mumble.

“You were held captive in an abandoned building by two psychos. No one is expecting you to look like you just stepped off the runway,” Leli says.

“I know,” I say as I stand.

“Bolt should be back soon,” Leli says.

“He hates that you call him that,” Vash laughs.

“Yeah, and Volis hates it when I call him Volley,” she giggles.

“Right. Bolt and Volley,” I smile.

“Please, call them that,” Leli says as we walk inside.

“All good?” Dad asks me when we come into the living room.

“Yeah. Did you guys watch?” I ask.

“Yeah. You did a good job, Lilith,” he says before hugging me. I wrap my arms around him, wanting comfort. I am crashing emotionally.

“I’m sorry you keep having to go through losing me,” I say quietly.

“You’re right here,” he says, kissing the top of my head. “You are safe, so I never lost you.”

I want badly to tell him that I saw Mom, but I don’t know if that was her or not. I don’t know if it was just Morwen trying to hurt me or if that was actually her. If it was, how do I tell him that his wife is not only alive but hurt the person he thought she essentially gave her life to save? I think being betrayed by his mate and the mother of his children would hurt worse than her dying.

I can’t even begin to comprehend how it could even be Mom. Dad felt her die. That is a feeling you can’t replicate, right? My mates felt the pain of me dying, but I actually was dying. If Thuly hadn’t gotten to me when he did, I probably would have died. I need to find answers before I let him know about her. I don’t want to hurt him all over again.

Striker comes into the house and sets the pizzas on the coffee table. It fills the room with a mouthwatering scent. “Thank you, Bolt,” I say to my brother with a smile.

“Oh, Gods. Not you too,” he groans. Leli giggles and sits on the couch across from us with Vash. Everyone else sits with us as I get a slice of pizza.

“Eat slowly,” Leli says. “Magic won’t protect you from barfing if you eat too quickly. I already know you all haven’t had much to eat.”

“Uhm… No. Not much,” I say between bites. When I have had more than enough, I look up at everyone and sigh. “So, do you want to know the version I’ll tell the public or the detailed account of what happened?”

“Like you told me, tell us whatever you are comfortable with us knowing,” Leli says.

I tell them everything from the kidnapping itself to the twenty members of his pack. I explain what the witch did but don’t explain who she appeared to be. I tell everyone about how I tricked Zypher and what I did to him in his dreams. Dad and my siblings found that especially humorous. I tell them about the vines and how they were creeping closer over time before explaining how Zypher and Morwen died.

“Wow,” Dad says. “I didn’t think I could be proud of someone for assaulting another person.”

“I wanted him to feel as humiliated and hurt as he made me feel,” I say. “I was so fucking mad… To go that far to try and make me reject my mates… That didn’t just hurt me either. That hurt them… That is what makes me angry the most. It’s one thing to hurt me, but… The pain on their faces and in their voices while they begged me to understand that it wasn’t them… They deserved far more than I gave them. They deserve to get whipped until they can’t move. They deserve to be isolated and deprived of their reason for living. They don’t have mates. They don’t know what it’s like to sit across the room from someone while they sob and plead with you to forgive them for something they never wanted to do. They don’t know what it’s like to have someone hurt you while they are in your head telling you they can’t make themselves stop. You feel the pain, but you have to force the logic into your head that the person touching you is not the one hurting you.”

“Morwen was trash, but Zypher was the epitome of evil. The devil himself would have had mercy for me before Zypher would. I just can’t wrap my head around why… Why me? Why not find some she-wolf who would happily bend for the pack alpha? Why go after the maiden? What did I do to deserve that much pain and suffering?”

“Lilith,” Brenna says as she moves to sit in front of me and take my hands. “You did nothing to deserve that pain. He went after you because his pride was hurt. He had you and thought you were brainwashed… He thought it would be simple to get you back. What he didn’t count on was how strong you are. He didn’t expect you to fight or to outsmart him. He severely underestimated who he was hurting. But baby… he’s dead. They are both dead. That means you get to put them in your past. There is no threat of them coming around the corner again one day. You are free, Lilith. You’re free because you fought and survived them.”

“You know… He said I didn’t understand the storm I was putting myself in. I told him I was the storm. I told him he wouldn’t survive the monster he created…”

“And he didn’t survive. He is currently a pile of ash somewhere in Estroria,” Brenna says with a smile.

“Thank you,” I say as I hug her. “You were the closest thing to a mom I had growing up. Now I get you, Dad, and siblings. I can’t imagine a better outcome to all of this darkness.”

“Me either, sweetie,” she says, tucking a stray hair behind my ear. “I wish your mother was here to see the woman you’ve become. She’d be a big ball of nerves trying to wait on you hand and foot, but you’d never question her love for you.”

“Yeah,” I say with a weak smile. The possibility that the witch who had my mates hurt me was actually my mother is already crushing. Part of me doesn’t want to find out and just leave the woman from the abandoned building where Leli took her, but I know it won’t get it out of my head until I can get some answers.

“Lilith…” Volis starts to say.

“Stop it,” I say. “Don’t apologize again. Please. If I blamed you, you’d know.”

“After hearing all that… I’d say you wouldn’t be breathing if she blamed you,” Striker laughs.

“Speaking of,” Leli says. “What are you doing with Fermin?”

“When I’m ready to go into public again, I’m going to go see him. I’ll decide from there how he will be executed.”

“Well, we are going to get out of your hair,” Striker says. “The portal is still open, so we are going to go back to the house in Voradia for the evening.”

“Okay,” I say as I stand to hug him. “I’ll be more social later on. I just need to rest.”

“Don’t worry about it, sis. Just call us if you need anything, okay?” He asks as he hugs me tightly.

“I will. I’ll call you all in a few days, and we can plan to sit down with the council. I’m sure that needs to happen before we address the public.”

“Stop making plans and just focus on resting,” Dad says.

“You can be productive by showering and resting,” Callum says.

“You three need rest also,” I say.

“As long as you do, we will too,” Daemon says.

“Well, that’s not fair,” I frown.

“Maybe... Maybe not… But it will get you to rest,” he grins.

“Get some rest,” Dad says, chuckling. “Call us later.”

We walk them to the door to see everyone out. I feel bad not getting to know my brother’s new mates more, but I just don’t have it in me to do it right now. I hardly even know my family, but I have plenty of time to get to know everyone.

Once everyone is gone, I go upstairs with my mates. I assume our stuff has made it here, but even if not, we still have clothes here. I go straight to the bathroom and turn the shower on. I need to cleanse myself of the horrors from the last week. I don’t know if I will ever feel clean again. I was used and abused over and over. I was made to bleed in so many different ways.

I keep feeling as though I left a piece of myself behind when we walked out of that room. It’s not until I step under the scalding hot water that I realize that I did in fact leave a part of myself behind. I left all of my fear and weakness behind. I left behind the woman who chose to be blind to her abuse rather than fighting. I will never be her again. I will never choose to be blissfully ignorant to the horrific truth of my lifelong trauma again. I spent my entire life just trying to survive.

Brenna did her best to keep us out of harm’s way, but it never stopped the evil from seeping into our lives. It didn’t stop the stranger from groping me on the train at thirteen. It didn’t stop the men from catcalling me at sixteen, knowing I was a child. No matter how hard someone tries to protect you, there is no way to stop evil from happening. The people who wish to do harm will still do harm no matter if it’s to you or someone else. If it wasn’t me that was assigned to Zypher, it would have been any number of girls to get raped for hours on end by countless men while he laughed at their tears. Someone with a looser grip on their sanity could have been subjected to his torture, and maybe they wouldn’t have survived the way I did. Maybe they would have remained blissfully ignorant and unaware of their trauma. So, why me? Why did Zypher want me? Maybe it was because he loved to see how far I would bend without breaking, or maybe it was because he wanted what he could never have.

The prophecy only stated that I would be mated with the kings and a war would come. It never said who would win or if I would survive. I did that. I survived. I won the war. Sure, it started over issues that began over three hundred years ago. The tipping point was me, though. Me becoming mated to the Three Kings and us fighting for peace and equality together sent my abusers into a spiral. They tried to take me down with them, but I survived.

My mates step into the shower with me, and it takes me back to the time they washed me after we mated for the first time. This time is no different. They take their time washing me and themselves. Washing away everything from the last week. Having them wash away the abuse left behind in my body is a level of comfort that I never knew existed. I grew accustomed to taking care of myself after one of Zypher’s numerous attacks. No matter if it was just him or his entire pack and visiting packs, the emotions were always the same. I felt like nothing more than a toy for him to play with. I knew that he wouldn’t play with me nonstop, but when it did, it would feel like forever. Being alone in the shower after… loneliness would set in and it’s the only time I allowed myself to cry for the life I dreamed of having. Being here with my mates while they wash me only brings me solace. It shows me that sometimes those dreams we cry over while we are alone in the shower sometimes do come true.