Page 12 of Marrying a Marquess (Widows of Mayfair #3)

“I am,” Nick replied. “Would you save me a waltz?”

Oh, to be in his arms again. Drat, her cheeks melted again. “Yes.”

“Will you save me one as well?” David said. “Assuming they play two. If not, another dance, perhaps?”

“Yes, of course.”

She needed to concentrate on David, but how could she when Nick looked like he wanted to devour her?

What a pickle she was in. She had never experienced two suitors at the same time.

Come to think of it, she had never had a suitor ever.

You couldn’t count Jasper. Their courting was done through letters and quick secret meetings.

No wonder some of the young debutantes strung along several suitors during the Season.

The attention was exciting. It made Priscilla’s heart warm to know someone cared for her.

“I believe I will take my leave,” Latham said as he bowed. “Until this evening. Perhaps we could take that ride in the park tomorrow, weather permitting?”

“I would like that,” she replied.

After Latham exited the drawing room, Nick muttered as he stood, “I thought he would never leave.” He picked up her newly arrived cat and plopped him on her lap. Then he sat beside her on the settee.

“Why do you dislike him?” she asked, patting Snowball as she watched her mother pack up her embroidery.

“I’ll give the two of you some privacy,” her mother said as she left the room.

Priscilla had mixed feelings about being alone with Nick. Would Snowball save her from making a fool of herself?

“It is not a matter of liking or disliking him. I know he has redeemed himself in the eyes of the ton , but what if he slides back to his previous vices once again, pulling you down with him? What if you marry him, and he ruins you and everything he had the privilege of being born with? What would happen to you then?”

“I understand your worry,” she said with a frown.

She truly did. But as far as she was concerned, Nick was getting ahead of things.

Latham was courting her, not marrying her.

At least he hadn’t proposed yet. “You are looking too far forward. We have hardly started courting and getting to know one another. If and when our relationship becomes serious enough for his proposal, I will not answer immediately until discussing things with my father, who you know is a very pragmatic man and will not allow me to enter into a marriage if he believes it will be detrimental to me. ”

“But?”

“I am quite capable of taking care of myself and making good decisions. Even though I eloped once, it wasn’t a rash decision.

I knew deep inside my heart that if Jasper had lived, we would have had a happy and loving marriage.

” She rubbed her chest at the sudden pain plaguing her at the memory of him.

“The only time I ever let my emotions get the better of me is when it comes to you.” Oh dear, she wished she could retract that last comment.

It wasn’t something she’d meant to share.

“I’m sorry things didn’t turn out as our mothers planned. I wasn’t ready for a serious courtship, never mind the wedding they planned. I never meant to hurt you, and I’m sorry if I ruined the life you thought you were to have.”

She snorted in a most unladylike way, and at the same time she blinked back tears.

“Don’t flatter yourself. I always knew you only placated our mothers and me regarding our supposed wedding.

” What had come over her? Why was she taunting him with words meant to wound him?

She knew why. She was retreating inside herself to protect her heart.

His hand shot out, and he grabbed hers. “Don’t. Don’t turn away from me. I thought we shared something special last evening.”

“Once again, don’t flatter yourself. I am hardly a virgin, and I took what I wanted.”

She refused to look at him and see the hurt in his eyes.

Knowing his body stiffened up as he tore his hand from hers was enough to know she insulted him and, worse, hurt him.

She, of all people, knew what being hurt by someone you cared for or even loved felt like.

He had done it to her. She hadn’t intended to say those things to him.

And she wasn’t retaliating for the hurt he caused her.

It just happened. The words flowed out of her mouth before she could stop them.

Just when she thought they had made progress in their relationship, her words had him retreating inside himself again, and she had only herself to blame. He hadn’t deserved her cruel words, truth or not.

Standing, he nodded his head, his features and eyes guarded. Once again, his emotions were bottled up from the world and her. “I will see you this evening. If you want to renege on that waltz, feel free.”

He pivoted around and exited the room before she could respond.

Renege? No. She wanted that waltz. They had never waltzed before, and as far as she was concerned, it was high time they did.

Giving up on holding back her tears, she let them flow.

She had no one to blame but herself for how things turned out with Nick just now.

Perhaps she would apologize tonight if he came to collect on his dance.