Page 21 of Make Me Scream (Visceral #2)

ABEL

I stare out the front window in a daze. I just can’t fucking believe it.

The day is here… it’s actually here.

I’m… moving into Lucy’s apartment. I’m never coming back here.

“Do…” Elise clears her throat, and I hear the tears clogging it. I clench my molars and close my eyes swiftly. “Do you have all of your things?”

“They forever fit inside the bag, Elise,” I mutter, kicking my ratty backpack with the tip of my Converse, refusing to look at her.

“I know you have more than that, Abel. Please take it all. I want you to have everything you need there.” She walks over to me at the kitchen table and pulls up a chair, but she keeps her distance like she’s afraid to come any closer.

I almost laugh at her reservation.

“It’s fine.”

“I’ve got it all right here, Ma.” Peris strides into the room and drops a big, black duffle back onto the floor with a jarring thud. I jolt in my seat and whip around with wide eyes to stare at the bag he dropped at my feet, a haughty smile on his full lips.

It’s one of his. One that he uses for basketball practice.

“What’s that?” I deadpan.

“Your shit.” He crosses his arms over his chest.

I grit my teeth. He doesn’t fucking get it. “I don’t want it.”

“You don’t have a choice, runt.”

“ Peris, ” Elise hisses.

I laugh loudly. “You’re telling me.” This makes him wince, and I almost feel bad. Almost. But then, I catch sight of Lucy’s piece of shit Honda pulling up beside the curb, and I suddenly don’t care about much of anything anymore.

“Abel…” Elise starts to cry, and I can’t stand it. This is why I wanted to do this alone—to be alone in this.

“Please don’t,” I beg, on the verge myself. I can’t fucking do this.

Without warning, she pushes to her feet and pulls me into her arms, squeezing tight. I struggle to stand, but as she envelops me in her hold, her scent overwhelms me, and I feel so fucking loved, I can’t help the tears that escape.

“I love you, Abel,” she breathes into me.

“So, so much. You will always have a home here, and the door is always open, okay? Come every day if you can—if… if you want to. We will always be here for you.” She rubs her hands up and down my back over and over, trying to get some warmth back into my body, but I’m so cold, I’m terribly numb. To the bone.

To the core. I can’t feel a damn thing other than bleak, all-consuming despair.

I can’t believe I let myself get so deep in this family.

I was so fucking stupid…

When I begin to pull away, she plants her hands on my biceps, keeping me still until I meet her eyes.

“And keep your phone.” When my brows pinch, she continues, “You need a way to communicate with people, and it’s yours, anyway.

I don’t want you to stress about that. So, keep the phone with you.

I’ll pay the bill, so don’t worry about that, please.

I would have paid, regardless, because you were supposed to be here, anyway, yeah?

” She says that part softer, rubbing her thumb along my cheek, catching a stay tear.

She wipes it away like it never existed, and I sniffle, turning away in shame.

She lets me go with a shaky breath—and in the next second, Lucy is honking her horn, setting the tone for the next two months of my fucking life.

Survive, Abel.

You just have to survive a little while longer.

“I guess it’s time, then?” she bites out, plastering on a fake smile.

I nod, rolling my eyes, even as I straighten my shoulders. “Guess so.”

“Peris, would you mind?—”

“Already planned on it, Ma.”

“Thanks, babe. Abel, please call me if you need absolutely anything. Day or night.”

I won’t—and I think she knows that—but I nod anyway as I roll my shoulders, sinking back into the skin I thought I had long left behind. It still fits like a fucking glove, and if that’s not a relief…

“Sure thing, doc,” I shoot her a wink, and she gives me the saddest smile I’ve ever seen.

I pretend it doesn’t hurt.

My bag is light between my fingers as I pick up the frayed strap and sling it over my shoulder. Peris grabs the duffle and follows me out of the front door—silent in our departure—until we reach the end of the sidewalk.

It’s bitterly cold—Christmas is two measly weeks away. Ice clings to the concrete, making it slick as I meander around it, and snow weighs down the grass. But it glistens in the sunlight, appearing like tiny little crystals. It’s beautiful and blinding.

I look away, shivering in the coat I got but rarely ever wear as the wind gusts and blows my hair around.

“You have your phone, right?” Peris asks.

“Yes, Peris.” I roll my eyes, unable to help it.

“Good. Please fucking use it,” he says, unable to meet my gaze.

“I will, baby boy. Mustn’t forget to text you, hm?” He stops walking and drops the bag to the ground to grab my shoulder and yank me back, clearly not giving a fuck that both of our mothers are watching.

I guess we’re finally doing this.

“Don’t fucking play with me right now, runt,” he snarls, getting close enough to my face, I can taste the mint of his toothpaste as it marries with the frigid air we share. It makes my eyes roll back.

“But I love playing with you, baby,” I purr, pulling my bottom lip in between my teeth. Peris steps forward and wraps his large hand around the back of my neck, drawing me close. He twines his fingers into my hair and yanks, making me yelp.

“And I love playing with you, puppy. But right now, I’m not. ” His tongue traces the shell of my ear, and I melt for him. “Use your damn phone, do you understand?”

“Yes, sir,” I moan, shivering.

“Good.” He releases his hold but not before drawing my mouth to his and kissing me harshly.

My eyes widen before fluttering closed in bliss as our lips mold together.

My bag slips from my shoulder and falls to the ground as my arms wind around Peris’s neck.

I reach on my tiptoes to get as close as possible, pressing my front to his.

He grunts when my crotch grinds into his, but it’s more of an innocent touch than anything. A simple desire to connect and feel one another.

“I’m gonna miss you, baby boy,” I murmur against his mouth, hating the grating noise of Lucy interrupting us. Peris’s hold on my waist tightens, too, and I smile sadly at that.

“You’ll see me at school tomorrow,” he reminds me, but it’s almost as if he’s trying to remind himself, too.

“Not the same.” I’m pouting. I didn’t expect it to hurt like this, but… fuck.

“I know, runt.” He sighs as he draws me into his arms, encasing me in the warmest hug. I melt against him, but I don’t let the tears fall this time. Not again—I can’t. I save them for later—for when I absolutely can’t hold it back.

“I’ve gotta go,” I mutter against the warmth of his chest. The strong security I don’t want to walk away from.

“I know,” he says but doesn’t loosen his grip. If anything, he holds me tighter. Bruise me, baby.

My smile widens. “Elise is gonna be pissed,” I warn him, and that makes him stiffen.

“If you’re trying to get me to let go, that’s not the way to do that. If anything, it makes me want to go back inside even fucking less.”

“She’s gonna tear you apart,” I muse.

He huffs hotly against the top of my head. “To say the least.”

“Better call reinforcements.”

“Who? Like Gabe? I think not. He’d have a fucking field day— and he’d take Ma’s side. I’m better off on my own.”

“True. Sorry I won’t be here.”

“Me too, runt. Me, too.” Lucy honks again, and this time, Peris loses it. His arms tighten around my head as he pins me against his chest.

“Would you shut the fuck up and give us a minute?!” he screams at her. The vibration of his voice rumbles inside my brain, and my eyes flutter closed.

“So romantic,” I mutter when he finally pulls away, dragging me with him.

His face pulls up in disgust, making me laugh so loudly, my entire body shakes with it. It’s a good feeling—one I hope follows me into my nightmares tonight as I lie in the cold darkness of a strange place.

“Don’t be fucking weird, runt. Now—" he grabs my shoulders and spins me around—"It’s time for you to leave me,” he mutters as he guides me toward Lucy’s car, bags in hand. I let him escort me, my mind numb and eyes unseeing.

He opens my door for me, his eyes narrowed and colder than I’ve ever fucking seen them as he dips down to press a kiss to my cheek in goodbye, handing me my backpack, knowing I need it in my possession.

That nearly breaks my composure.

“I was always going to leave you, Peris,” I say in parting to him, choking on the words.

He smiles at me—and I break. “I know, Abel.” With that, he slams my door and drops the duffle bag in the back. Lucy doesn’t waste any time pulling away without a word, leaving a trail of carbon emissions in her wake.

Peris stands in snow-covered grass, his sweatshirt-clad arms wrapped around his middle like he’s trying to keep his insides inside.

Tears fall in fast tracks down my face as I watch his reflection in the rearview slowly dimmish into nothing as Lucy turns the corner, and he’s gone.

“Well, we are finally together!” she says, all fucking chipper.

I don’t bother wiping the stains away. If I could, I’d leave them until they scarred. It’s only fair.

“Don’t fucking talk to me.”

“Now, Abel…” she chastises, long fingers tapping on the wheel as she drives down Main Street.

“Nah, I mean it, Lucy.” I clutch my bag tighter in my fist. “You got what you wanted, but that doesn’t mean I have to play your fucking games.”

She sighs loudly with a slight groan. “You’re going to make this as difficult as possible, aren’t you?” The car lulls to a stop at a stop sign, and I have to fight the urge to shove the door open and just bolt.

I stare out at the glittering snow, the matted footprints, and indents from the soles. Pawprints and slush from the wheels pressed against the curbs—a curb I’d love to just smash my fucking head against until my skull cracks wide open…