Page 31 of Loving Amari
I look at him and smile, my heart so full it might burst. “I love you too, Amari.”
I push him back until his head is resting against the pillow, then lie on top of him, my ear pressed to his chest. His heartbeat drums steady and strong beneath me. I breathe in his scent.
“I want you to sleep,” I tell him, splaying my hand over his heart.
“I don’t think I can. I’ll lose my mind if I wake up and you’re not here.”
I look up at him, meeting those beautiful golden eyes that have seen centuries but still look at me like I’m a miracle. “What if I promise to stay? That I’ll be right here when you wake up?”
Amari doesn’t answer for a moment, his jaw working as he processes my words. Then he says, “You can’t make promises like that. Your powers are increasing. You might get pulled into limbo again.”
“I think Mother Fate had me see what she wanted me to see. And with our children in limbo doing god knows what with Aya, I’m sure we’ve got a little time to be alone together.”
Amari sighs, and I smile because he’s finally relaxing, the tension slowly leaving his body. His muscles uncoil beneath me, and I feel the moment he starts to let go.
“Stay on top of me,” he requests, his hands settling on my back. “Your warmth, your sweet peachy scent will help me.”
“Okay. I’ll do that.”
Amari smiles at that, the expression softening his features and making him look younger. Then he chuckles. “This whole situation is funny.”
I sit up again and look at him, curious. “How so?”
He puts his hand on my back, rubbing it gently while keeping his gaze focused on the ceiling. His fingers trace small circles that make my skin tingle. “When we first met, I made it my immortal mission to make sure that you knew you were a vision, magnificent, and didn’t need the acceptance you craved so much.”
He finally looks from the ceiling to meet my eyes, moving his hand from my back to gently stroke my cheek. “Look at you now. You’re a magnificent vision, and now you’re the one uplifting me.”
I move my lips to his palm, kissing it softly. His skin is cool against my lips. “Isn’t that how it’s supposed to be as a mated couple? Both of us working together and building each other up?”
“It can’t just be all you taking care of me,” I continue, my voice steady. “I’m supposed to take care of you too. Now go to sleep, or I’ll rescind my offer to take you to limbo with me tomorrow.”
Amari’s hands fall flat on the mattress at his sides—he’s preparing his body for slumber, I can tell. It’s fascinating to watch, the way his vampire nature takes over.
“Stay on me for as long as you can stand it,” he says, his eyes already growing heavy.
“I’m not going anywhere, Amari.”
But the flutter from his heart tells me he doesn’t believe me, and that hurts more than I want to admit. After everything we’ve been through, he still fears losing me.
“Believe in me, Amari. Believe that I’ll always choose you.”
“I love you, Carla,” he whispers, and then his eyes close.
His body goes completely limp, like it’s turned to stone. His slumber is a deep sleep, one that he cannot wake from, but he’s told me from time to time that his mind is still awake sometimes even though his body is resting. It’s one of the strange quirks of being a vampire—this death-like sleep that isn’t quite death.
I pepper kisses across his chest, then rest my head against it, listening to his heartbeat and smiling at the steady thump of it. I just lie on top of him, thinking about the past, smiling as I rub over his resting form. I know he’s not going to wake up—he can’t, not until his body is fully rested.
“I could kick your ass for forcing yourself to stay awake for so long,” I whisper against his skin. “You know it’s not healthy.”
I giggle when his heart starts to quicken. He’s listening to me. Even in this deep slumber, part of him is still aware, still connected to me. I continue to rest against him, my fingers tracing patterns on his skin—hearts, stars, the letters of his name.
“It’s so silly that you’re afraid of losing me. I’m afraid of losing you every day. You’re so handsome, intelligent, so powerful. Yet, you choose me every day. It’s like I’m living in a dream.”
I run my fingers over his arms, feeling the strength there even in rest. The muscles are relaxed now, but I know the power they contain.
“Even with the mate bond, that still sits in the back of my mind sometimes. But you always assure me, without question.”
A yawn escapes me, and I murmur sleepily, “Sometimes I think that if I’m gone too long in limbo that you’ll get tired of waiting for me to come back. It terrifies me. I have to figure out a way to balance this out, or I’m going to lose you.”