Page 20

After I unlocked the door and opened it, shit was on and poppin. We ain’t even make it to the bedroom. Clothes came off at the door. Lips on lips. Hands all over. Her skin tasted like cocoa and champagne. I needed all of her. And she gave it. Loud and soft at the same time.

By the time we made it to the bed, we were tangled in sheets, breathless, high off lust, sativa and tequila. As she rode my dick, my hand went around her neck before I pulled her down so I could taste her lips.

“Fuck.” I groaned once her feet sat flat on either side of me as she bounced up and down, pussy walls squeezing the fuck out of my dick. “Just like that baby, ride this dick.” I sat up and kissed her again, sucking and biting her bottom lip. “That’s it baby, give me all that shit.”

“Oh God.” She moaned her head falling back. She stared at the ceiling, still bouncing, still riding, pulling my nut out of me until we both erupted; her guts full of my seeds and my stomach wet with her juices.

Thank God for birth control, which we established she had implanted in her arm after the first time I ran up inside of her raw.

That shit was reckless as hell for both of us, but after confirming the birth control and sharing test results on MyChart with each other shit was on and poppin from there.

Averi collapsed on top of me, and I rubbed her hair out of her face before kissing her.

My heart was racing, a sheen of sweat enveloping both of us, dick still inside of her.

I grabbed the blanket and pulled it over our bodies wrappin my arms around her.

It wasn’t long after that, that my baby was snoring, fast asleep.

Before my own eyes closed I couldn’t help but think how good this felt. How good it felt to have her in my arms, in my bed and deep in my heart. I had never felt a love like this before.

I was dead asleep.

Averi laid across my chest, soft and warm, her legs tangled with mine under the covers. Her steady breathing was soothing me deeper into sleep, and for the first time in a long time, I felt at peace.

Then—

BANG. BANG. BANG.

My eyes snapped open. Fists were pounding hard on the door. Not a knock. A fuckin’’ alarm .

Averi stirred, still half-asleep. “What the hell…?”

I slid out of bed, grabbing my shorts off the chair then going into my nightstand to get my gun just in case I needed it, my heart already picking up speed. My phone was dead on the nightstand. I’d meant to put it on the charger hours ago but… I’d been distracted.

“Stay here.” I told Averi, gun in my hand as I made my way out of my bedroom, down the short hallway, past the kitchen and living room and to the front door.

I yanked the door open, ready to cuss whoever it was the fuck out.

“Yo, who?—”

My words stopped seeing Zay standing there. I relaxed for a second but only a second until I saw his face; he looked... broken. His normally steady frame was trembling, face drenched in sweat, and tears just sittin’ in his eyes like they ain’t know where to fall.

“Aye—” My voice caught in my throat. “What the fuck goin’ on?”

He opened his mouth, then closed it. Shook his head once.

Then he said it, three words that would change everything for me… “King got shot.”

It felt like the whole world stopped. Behind me, I heard Averi gasp. “What?”

“W-We was leavin’ the club,” Zay choked out.

“Some young niggas pulled up mad about a bitch that was in our section. They started talkin’ reckless, and King…

he was poppin his shit, you know how he is, shit escalated.

I tried to get King back inside but one of ‘em pulled. Just—” His voice cracked.

I blinked. My body felt frozen, like I couldn’t move.

Couldn’t breathe. Zay wiped his face as a few tears had fallen.

“They took him to Grady. I been callin’ you—yo shit was goin straight to voicemail.

Miss Queenie and Princess at the hospital, she told me to come get you. ”

Averi appeared behind me, wearing one of my tees and a pair of my boxers.

Her curls were a mess, eyes wide and terrified.

“Royal… what’s going on?” I didn’t answer.

I couldn’t. I was already in motion. Throwing on sweats and a hoodie, grabbing my keys, phone and wallet.

“Royal—wait!” Averi tried to reach for me, but I pulled away.

“I gotta go,” I muttered, already heading for the elevator.

“Wait—wait, slow down!” she yelled after me. “You can’t just— talk to me! ”

But I didn’t, couldn’t. I didn’t have the words to say to her, didn’t have the patience to try to pacify her feelings. Zay ran behind me, and we were out the building in seconds, jumping in his Challenger.

The ride to the hospital was a blur of red lights and silence. My leg wouldn’t stop bouncing, my cellphone was now plugged in, on Zay’s charger. I clenched my fists so tight my knuckles popped.

“You was right there?” I finally said, voice low and deadly.

Zay nodded, barely able to meet my eyes. “Right next to him.”

“Why the fuck ain’t you stop it?”

“It happened fast , Ro. One second, we laughin’, next second somebody yellin’. Then shots.” He slammed the steering wheel. “I shoulda done something, man. I shoulda?—”

“Stop.” My voice cracked. “Just fuckin’’ drive.”

We pulled up to Grady Memorial, the ER lights casting a cold, sterile glow on the cracked pavement. I jumped out before the car even stopped moving. Inside, it was chaos. Beeps. Stretchers. Nurses movin’ like they was on autopilot.

Then I saw them— Queenie and Princess standing in front of a doctor. As I approached them, my mama’s knees gave out.

“Mama!” I dropped down beside her. Her wail was the worst sound I ever heard. The kind of scream that don’t come from the throat—it comes from the soul. I looked up at the doctor. He wouldn’t meet my eyes. “ No. No, no, no, no— ” I repeated, shaking my head. “Tell me he good. TELL ME HE GOOD!”

The doctor placed a hand on my shoulder. “I’m so sorry. We did everything we could…”

Princess burst into tears, clutching Queenie, who just rocked back and forth on her knees. Zay was silent, standing near a wall. I stood up slowly. Backpedaled. Everything felt like it was underwater, muffled and time seemed to have slowed down.

“FUCK.” I yelled punching the wall.

“Please…” the doctor said. “I understand this is an emotional time for you. Let’s get you out of prying eyes Mr. Teegan.” He knew who I was, had to. It was the only reason I could think of that he would suggest we moved from out of the open.

I went over and lifted my mama and Princess off the ground before they led us to a small private family room. Four salmon colored walls, one ugly ass green couch, three plastic chairs, a box of tissues on a small end table and a clock ticking too fuckin’ loud.

I sat down in a chair and just stared at the floor. Zay came in, sat across from me, but I couldn’t even look at him. My mama and Princess huddled on the couch, hugging each other.

Averi’s name lit up on my phone screen again. I ignored it.

Then I saw the text.

Ave: I’m here if you need me. Please just talk to me.

But I couldn’t. Because all I could think was If I was there… he’d still be alive. If I hadn’t left that club with Averi… if I had stayed longer like King wanted me to, my brother would still be here.

Rage exploded inside me. I stood up and threw the chair across the room . It hit the wall and shattered. Princess screamed and Queenie jumped, then rushed over to me. “ROYAL! Stop! ”

I grabbed the end table and slammed it into the floor, splinters flyin’. “HE WAS JUST HERE!” I screamed. “HE WAS RIGHT FUCKIN’ HERE!” My mother’s arms wrapped around me. I collapsed into her, shaking. “I’m sorry, Mama,” I sobbed. “I’m so sorry.”

She cried with me. Held me. Rocked me like I was still her little boy. “I know, baby,” she whispered. “I know.”

The world had stopped. And I didn’t know if it would ever start again.

The drive back was silent. Zay didn’t say a word.

I didn’t either. What the fuck could be said?

The streets blurred outside the window. Every red light felt like a goddamn insult.

My ears were still ringing from my mama’s cries.

That wail, the way she screamed, it was surreal.

But nothing could block out the truth; King was gone.

And I wasn’t there. I wasn’t fucking there.

By the time we pulled into the building, me finishing my album, the tequila, the music, the VIP lights from earlier—it all felt like a fucked up dream. A cruel ass setup. And the only thing louder than my heartbeat was the pounding guilt clawing at my chest.

I just wanted to get upstairs, lock the door and sit in silence. I didn’t say a word to Zay, had no words left to give him or anybody else.

Minutes later, I stepped off the elevator, barely remembering how I got to my door, my hands shaking as I pushed it open. I wasn’t ready to talk to nobody. Not Zay, Not Queenie, not my Pops, not Princess, hell, not even God right now.

But when I stepped inside, there she was. She was sitting curled up on the couch in one of my hoodies, her legs pulled underneath her, makeup gone, hair finally tamed, face soft. Her eyes widened the moment she saw me, like relief just punched the air out of her lungs.

"Royal..." Her voice cracked as she stood, like she’d been holding her breath since I left.

I blinked. For a second, I almost felt grounded again. Shit, almost.

“You still here?” My voice came out rough, low. Too flat for the storm raging inside.

She swallowed, walking over slowly. “I—yeah. I couldn’t just leave. I didn’t know what happened. I’ve been calling you all night?—”

“I know.” I cut her off, eyes fixed past her.

She stopped inches away from me. “Royal, talk to me. What’s going on? What happened?”

My jaw locked. My throat tightened. I wanted to say it. Needed to. But the words tasted like blood, that coppery taste that made you want to throw up instantly. So, I just shook my head and muttered, “He gone.”

Her whole body froze. “What?” Her voice barely made it past her lips.

“King…” I forced out. “He dead, Averi.”

A sharp gasp cut through the room like a blade. Her hand covered her mouth, and tears immediately welled up in her eyes. “Royal, I’m so sorry?—”

“I should’ve been there,” I said, more to myself than her. “If I ain’t leave him, he’d still be here.”

“Royal, no,” she whispered, shaking her head. “Don’t do that. Don’t blame yourself.”

But I already did. Her hand reached for mine, but I flinched. “I can’t… I can’t do this right now,” I said, stepping back. “You gotta go.”

Her face fell. “Wait, what?”

“I need to be alone, Averi.”

“No. No, you don’t.” She moved toward me again. “Royal, you shouldn’t be alone right now. Let me stay. Please.”

I looked at her. Really looked at her. She was the only thing that felt good. That felt soft. But all I could think was if I hadn’t been with her… maybe I could’ve stopped it. Maybe my brother would still be here. She looked like warmth, but all I saw was pain.

“Get the fuck out,” I said as calmly as I could.

She stared at me in disbelief. “What?”

“GET…THE FUCK.. OUT, AVE.” My voice echoed off the walls.

Her mouth dropped open. Her eyes filled with fresh tears. “Royal…” she whispered, barely able to breathe.

But I couldn’t face her anymore. Couldn’t stand there feeling like it was her fault. It wasn’t fair. None of this shit was fair. I turned and stormed into the bedroom, slamming the door so hard the walls shook. I dropped onto the bed, my head in my hands, chest heaving.

Her scent was still on the sheets. I hated myself for what I said, for how I was moving, especially with her. I hated this pain even more. But right now, in this very moment, I just needed the world to shut the fuck up and leave me alone.