Page 90 of Love to Loathe Him

So that’s what this little pow-wow is about. The man who made me squirt on Saturday night is now chewing me out about people pulling out of our recruitment process. Never mind thatIalready senthimthis information this morning.

And I’m gutted about it. I don’t understand what happened.

“That’s right,” I confirm. “We added everything she asked for into our revised offer. But in the end, she still chose Vertex, in the final stages of negotiation.”

Liam’s lip curls back in a sneer. “And why the hell is that, exactly?”

I swallow hard against the lump of indignant rage blocking my throat. “Vertex came in with a better offer. But I don’t understand how they even knew she was interested in relocating.”

I hand-picked Kim Hye-jin, amongst others, after doing a lot of research. It’s just too coincidental. “She’s being cagey but I’m determined to get more feedback.”

“That isn’t good enough,” he growls, his Yorkshire accent thickening. “That’s the most wishy-washy excuse for an answer I’ve ever heard.”

My face flames as he reprimands me like a misbehaving child. The audacity of this prick, speaking to me like that. Hell no.

“I can’t force people to join us against their will,” I bite out. “The final choice is ultimately up to them.”

He runs a hand through his hair, agitated. “Did you offer the top relocation package and rent for the first year?”

“Yes.”

“And the company shares?”

“Liam, I offered everything we talked about. And when she started to withdraw, I doubled down and offered even more. It wasn’t enough. I built a great relationship with this lady. She was really apologetic this morning but ultimately, Vertex has poached her from right under our noses.”

He leans back in his fancy leather chair, regarding me. “So this is what you’re going to do. You’re going to send me every last communication—emails, calls, meetings, all of it—that your team had with the three candidates who pulled out. Right to my personal inbox. I’m going to see for myself what went wrong here.”

“Don’t micromanage me,” I hear myself snarl before I can bite it back. He wants the damn truth? Fine. “I did my job thoroughly and entirely by the book, Liam. If you have issues with my handling or my process, then we can discuss that like the professionals we’re supposed to be. But not with you undermining my every move as though I’m some incompetent intern.”

Liam’s eyes narrow into slits. A muscle ticks in that sharp jaw. “Something went wrong in this situation. And sometimes the only way to get to the bottom of these fuckups is by dissecting them in detail myself.”

“Here’s some more truths for you, Liam. That’s a terrible style of management. I will review the situation myself and come to my own conclusions on precisely why she didn’t accept our offer in the end.” I hold his gaze. “Then, as the head of HR for this firm, I will report back to you with my analysis and a plan of action.”

For a long, agonizing moment, Liam says nothing. Then, finally, the tiniest smirk tugs at the corner of his lips. “Very well. Have the files on my desk before you leave tonight.”

“Fine.” I could not have clipped the word any more if I tried.

He nods, just a slight tilt of his chin, before his desk phone starts blaring. “That’ll be all then.”

My face flames scarlet, the dismissal stinging like a slap to the face.

You bastard, I think, my hands clenching into fists at my sides.

The urge to tell him to go fuck himself is overwhelming.

Because after Saturday night, after the way he touched me, the way he made me feel . . . I can’t even look at him without feeling a confusing mix of rage and longing.

Because I’m only human. And I have to remember that he is likely a sociopath. He doesn’t care about whether he offends me. He cares about his business and his basic human need to want to fuck, it seems, nothing more.

But I know what this man looks like when he comes. I know what he looks like lying asleep. At his most vulnerable. And I can’t flip between both versions of the man so easily, can’t reconcile the man who makes my body feel ecstasy with the one who cuts me down so easily.

I storm out of there, my heart pounding with a mix of rage and something else—something more pathetic. Something that makes me feel weak and foolish.

I hate him. But even worse, I realize with a sickening jolt . . . I hate myself for still craving his approval, even after all this.

I get into the lift at lunchtime with my assistant, Mary. And by lunchtime, I mean that precious two-minute window where I tear myself away from my desk to grab a sad little sandwich from the café before scurrying back to my office.

Then I have to somehow sort out this messy love triangle situation between Emily in Marketing, Daniel, and Michelle, his other side piece from Accounting. Not to mention figuring out why everyone is suddenly declining our offers in favor of jumping ship to Vertex.