Page 41 of Love Thy Enemy (The Vaughns #4)

D ressing oneself was not a great feat. True, Tessa had rarely done so before she’d been forced to venture into the great world alone, but she had learned to manage what the vast majority of people did daily.

She didn’t purchase dresses or corsets that required a second set of hands, and thus, hadn’t required assistance to dress in years.

Yet now, she required both Daphne and Mrs. Ferrell.

“Are you certain you should be up, madam?” asked the housekeeper, giving Tessa yet another thorough examination. “Mr. Vaughn wouldn’t begrudge you a few more days abed.”

“No, but I begrudge myself such idleness.” Leveling an appreciative look at the lady, Tessa added, “And I will expire of boredom if I am forced to remain there another day.”

Giving a crisp nod and a final brush of Tessa’s skirts, Mrs. Ferrell ensured they were hanging perfectly before striding out the door, leaving her in Daphne’s care.

Silently, the young lady guided her mother to the dressing table and sat her before it, taking Tessa’s locks in hand.

With quick movements, Daphne brushed out the dark tresses and wound them up into a tidy coiffure.

“That is lovely,” said Tessa, turning her head to the side to examine the style. “Simple yet elegant. I will have to copy it in the future.”

Daphne’s cheeks pinked, and she mumbled a quiet word of thanks before turning to leave once more.

Snagging her daughter by the hand, Tessa kept her by her side. “Are you still angry with me, love? About Mr. Spooner, I mean. I apologize if I embarrassed you.”

Tessa was quite willing to acknowledge that much, though she didn’t feel the slightest bit guilty about the end result of that scene. Just the memory of that blackguard pawing at her daughter set Tessa’s pulse racing again, but she didn’t wish to cause heartache of any sort.

“Yes,” said Daphne, though her brow furrowed, and she added a quick, “And no.”

Pausing, the young lady considered the question and her feelings before saying, “I truly admire Mr. Spooner, and you made him very angry. And I do not know what Mr. Gregory said to him, but he has kept his distance, and it is breaking my heart.”

Rising to her feet—though unsteadily, as her legs were still weak—Tessa accepted Daphne’s arm of assistance and led her to the bed so that they could sit side by side. Turning to her daughter, she reached tentatively for Daphne’s hands.

And she allowed it!

Tessa tried to remain calm, but that little victory was enough to make her beam like a fool, though she had the good sense to school her features. Now was not the time for such displays.

Sorting through what she wished to say and what she ought to say, Tessa struggled to find the delicate balance between honesty and kindness.

Daphne wouldn’t listen if she simply told her Mr. Spooner was a blackguard who likely cared more about stealing her virtue or dowry than that beautiful heart beating in Daphne’s chest.

And the connection they were forging was so fragile that even the slightest breeze might break it, yet Tessa couldn’t remain silent.

Could she ever build a proper relationship with her daughter if she must censor every word she spoke?

Honesty was a cornerstone of strong connections, and being anything less than truthful would set a terrible precedent.

“I know that you care deeply for Mr. Spooner,” she said. The words were bitter on her tongue, but whether or not Tessa believed it to be true love was immaterial: Daphne believed it. “But I worry about how he has treated you.”

Straightening, Daphne shook her head. “But he is so kind. He will sit for hours and listen to my babbling without complaining.” A slight smile graced her lips.

“In fact, he seems to enjoy it. And he is forever bringing me presents. They might be little trinkets, but he will see a bit of ribbon in the shop and think of me.”

Good gracious, the fellow was quite good at turning a young lady’s head. Especially one so heartbroken.

“He has been nothing but a gentleman,” added Daphne.

“I hate to disagree with you, but exchanging illicit embraces in public is hardly the action of a gentleman,” said Tessa.

Daphne pulled her hands out of her mother’s grasp. “He couldn’t help himself. He said I am too beguiling to resist. And it was hardly public.”

Tamping down the frustration that reared its head at the distance her daughter had placed between them, Tessa considered how to explain the situation without besmirching the sainted Mr. Spooner.

Daphne continued to extol his virtues, and the more she spoke, the more it sounded as though she was an unappealing, awkward creature and he was beneficent enough to bestow his good opinion upon her.

Tessa’s pulse quickened as she listened, scouring her thoughts for what she might say to this. Daphne was walking straight into a trap that far too many girls fell into, only realizing their mistake once it was too late.

“We have so much in common,” added Daphne, her words coming quicker. “We like all the same things, and we laugh all the time. He is a burst of sunshine in my life.”

“And how does he handle disappointment?” asked Tessa. “You’ve mentioned all the happy things, but have you seen him in a temper? Or when you disagree?”

Daphne smiled and shook her head. “We never disagree.”

Oh, wasn’t that the siren song of the young? It was as though she were sitting before young Tessa, and though Rodney was not unscrupulous like Mr. Spooner (nor would he have ever treated a young lady like a trollop), Tessa remembered just how appealing it was to find such an “effortless” love.

She doubted Mr. Spooner’s aligned interests were genuine, making it doubly dangerous when Daphne was desperately searching for happiness from external sources.

A thoughtful smile graced Tessa’s lips as her mind turned back to those younger years, when it had been impossible to imagine one’s life being anything less than perfect.

It wasn’t as though she hadn’t seen her fair share of heartaches and tribulations, but it was so easy to believe that the future held far grander things.

That all one needed to do was find someone to love, and all would be set right in the world once more.

“I know how appealing that can seem,” said Tessa. “When people describe the perfect mate, more often than not, they yearn for similar interests and hobbies, and they imagine their life during the good times, searching for someone who fits perfectly into that world. No alterations required.”

Drawing in a deep breath, Tessa dismissed any words that strayed too close to describing Rodney.

“But life is rarely that perfect thing you imagine, Daphne. Finding a husband isn’t about securing the man who makes you laugh the most or makes the already lovely times lovelier.

It is about finding someone who bolsters you through the difficulties of life. A partner. A confidant. A support.”

Tessa sighed, her thoughts filling with all those hard-won lessons of the past. “You want someone who balances out your weaknesses. A pairing that improves and strengthens both parties. Someone who doesn’t simply agree with everything you say but challenges you, pushing you to broaden your opinions and view of the world. ”

As she spoke, a face settled in her mind, and the more she described that perfect partner of a man, the more Tessa saw just how much Mr. Vaughn possessed those qualities.

She hardly knew what she was saying as her heart fluttered, the erratic beat pulsing through her.

Tessa blinked, hardly breathing, as the shape of the truth unfolded in her chest.

It wasn’t a flash of thunder or a rush of wild passion. It was quiet. Gentle. A certainty that coalesced in her heart, taking shape as she spoke.

Gregory Vaughn was not perfect. He could be unbending, exacting, and positively infuriating. But he listened. Believed. Not blindly, not easily, but because he chose to see her as she truly was. And that meant more than any flirtation or compliment ever could.

“How will Mr. Spooner react when you lose a child? Or the economy falters, and your finances are strained? When those hard times arrive—and they will—what will he do?” she asked, finally daring to make a more pointed connection to Daphne.

“Will he lash out? Blame you? Ignore the trouble and leave you to suffer alone?”

Daphne opened her mouth to respond, but Tessa held up a hand to silence her.

“Do not be hasty to respond. And I am not demanding an answer. I simply want you to consider that when any young man approaches you. Finding someone who enhances the happy times is easy. You want someone who brings light to the darkness, else those joyful moments will become more and more fleeting whilst the hardships grow ever heavier to bear.”

Daphne sat there, her brows pulled together as she contemplated those words, and Tessa yearned to kiss her cheek.

But her heart knew she’d reached the edge of what Daphne would accept, so Tessa squeezed the girl’s hand, her gaze brimming with the words she wished to speak.

How much she loved her. How important her happiness was.

There were so many things Tessa yearned to say that Daphne was not ready to hear. Not yet.

Tessa couldn’t say whether or not Daphne’s heart accepted the advice, but she contented herself with believing that at the very least, it had not fallen on deaf ears.

Then, rising to her feet, Tessa left the bedchamber.

Her footsteps were slower than usual, and her legs felt like jelly, but they carried her along as thoughts of Mr. Vaughn filled her mind.

Tessa’s palms grew damp. More so than they’d been of late.

A rush of something coursed through her, not quite fear and not quite hope, and she didn’t know what to do with the epiphany that had struck.

Her situation hadn’t altered. Would she risk her children’s affections?

But Mr. Vaughn’s assurances rang in her thoughts. The family was warming to her, and it wasn’t as though she was agreeing to marry the fellow. Simply testing the waters, so to speak. Given time, the children might accept the situation. Welcome it, even.

Was that too much to hope for?