Page 13 of Love Me Back (Diamond Creek #2)

Jessie

I was lying on a bed, on top of Grayson Powell. Neither of us moved as we stared at each other. Well, one of us was moving, and it sure as hell wasn’t me. The hard length pushing against my stomach answered the question I was afraid to ask.

When my eyes widened, he smiled. “I won’t apologize.”

I scrambled off him, and he groaned when my hand accidentally landed on his... bulge.

Don’t look at me that way; it was an accident!

“Scoot back onto the bed,” I said as I lifted one of his legs and laid it on the mattress, followed by the other leg. “Not too far, you need to lie flat on your back.”

The tent in his pants had my face heating, and I turned away as he laughed at me. “Can’t you do something about that?” I asked, waving my hand in the direction of his crotch.

“You could.”

I turned an icy glare his way, and he lifted his hands in surrender. “I’m sorry.”

“I thought you wouldn’t apologize?” I said as I put a pillow under his head.

“I apologized for the crass remark. I refuse to apologize for getting hard when a beautiful woman is sprawled on top of me.”

I shook my head at his comment. Ellie was beautiful. Haizley was beautiful. Addie was downright gorgeous. I could admit I was pretty. All Hispanic women were. It was in our genes. Wide hips and big tits were also in our genes, and that was usually what most men noticed first.

Ignoring his comment about being beautiful, I lifted one leg and brought it up to a ninety-degree angle with his hip, keeping it bent at the knee. Then I pushed it up toward his chest.

“Fuck me, Jessie.” Grayson reached down and grabbed my hands from his leg, letting it fall back down on the bed. “Warn a guy next time. By some miracle the fall didn’t break my fucking dick, and I’d like to keep it that way.”

I rolled my eyes when he reached down and adjusted himself. I noticed he had deflated from the pain, and while I felt a little sorry for him, I was relieved it wouldn’t be staring at me while we did these exercises.

I spent an hour with Grayson, and the more he complained, the more excited I got. I knew he had feeling in his lower back; it was only his legs that didn’t work. That meant there was a chance that when the swelling had fully healed, he might walk again.

“Are you done torturing me?”

“Can you feel any pain in your legs?” I asked, trying to keep my voice even.

“No, but my hips and ass are on fire.”

“That’s good.”

“You’re a sadist, aren’t you?” I laughed at his pout. The man was too handsome for his own good, not to mention he was sweet and kind. Not for the first time, I wondered how he had made it to thirty-five without getting married.

“So how come you never married?” I asked, pretending to straighten up his blankets and tuck him in. It was something I always did when helping someone in the evening. Morning sessions, I’d help them into the bathroom to shower.

God, I’ll never survive helping him shower.

“Waited for the right girl,” he answered, though his voice sounded sad.

I should have kept my mouth shut and just said goodnight. But in true Jessica Montoya fashion, I said something stupid instead.

“I’m sure she’ll be around soon. Goodnight, Grayson.”

As I left the room, I heard him say, “Pretty sure I missed my chance.”

The next morning, I knocked on the door to Grayson’s room. When there was no answer, I slowly opened the door, but the room was empty. I slipped inside and made my way quietly to the bathroom, listening for movement. Silence answered me, and I began to worry.

I stared at the bathroom door, imagining the worst. Did he fall? His chair was missing, and it led me to believe he had made his way into the bathroom. I gently knocked on the door before opening it with my eyes squeezed shut.

“Grayson? Are you in here?”

Met with nothing but silence, I peeked through one eye.

“Where the hell are you?” I whispered into the empty room. I stormed down the hallway to the kitchen, and there he was, sitting at the table with his sister and brothers.

“What the fuck is wrong with you?” I shouted, getting everyone’s attention. Grayson looked up at me with wide eyes, confusion marring his brow.

“What?”

“You keep saying you’ll let me help you, but then you call your brothers,” I argued, crossing my arms over my chest.

“I didn’t call my brothers. I got into the chair by myself,” he said quietly.

“Oh.” I could feel the flush rising up my neck. I spun on my heels and marched to the refrigerator. Grabbing a handful of baby carrots, I stuck them in my pocket without anyone seeing.

“Do you want breakfast, Jessie?” Addie asked carefully.

I poked my head up over the door of the fridge and smiled. “Actually, I think I’ll take a walk first.” I let the refrigerator door close and rushed out the back and down the stairs. I could feel their curious stares boring into my back as I left.

I knew where I was going this time and headed straight for the barn. The doors weren’t open today, and I grabbed the handle and struggled for a few minutes before it finally opened enough for me to squeeze through.

The horses were all outside, except for the one I was looking for. His gate leading outside stood open, but he was in his stall as if he were waiting for me.

“Hey there, big guy. I brought you a snack.”

He shook his enormous head as I laid the carrots along the top of the stall door.

This might only be the second day, but I was enjoying our little visits.

I just wasn’t brave enough to put my hand close to his mouth.

As far as I knew, horses were herbivores, but just in case I was wrong, I was being careful.

“Who the hell are you?”

I jumped at the angry voice and spun around. A man stood there; one I didn’t recognize. I hadn’t met all the ranch hands, but I was pretty sure they had all been told who I was and why I was there.

“I’m Jessie.”

As he walked toward me, the first thing I noticed was his limp. The way he compensated for it had to be a knee injury, and I couldn’t help but wonder what had happened.

“What are you doing in here?”

“I just came to visit the horse.”

The closer the man came, the more agitated the horse was. His hooves stomped on the floor, and he snorted. The man sneered at the horse, then turned back to me.

“You don’t belong here,” he snarled, and the horse stuck its head over the stall door and snorted. His hoof pushed on the door as if he was trying to open it, and I thought about letting him out.

“Get the fuck out of here and don’t come back!” he shouted.

I made the choice to walk away. Could I have overpowered the man? Yes. My concern was upsetting Grayson by laying out one of his ranch hands.

I backed away from the horse and the angry man who was glaring at me. Maybe I would ask Addie about seeing the horses and see if she knew any reason why it would be a bad idea .

When I got to the barn doors, I pushed with everything I had and still was only able to open them just enough to squeeze through. Once outside, I took a deep breath.

Instead of going inside, I walked around the side of the barn to the paddock fence. I stood there for a few moments and smiled when the horse made its way outside, as if it could sense me.

Horses had always fascinated me. But they also terrified me. I stood by the fence and watched him trot around. The way he seemed to be performing for me had me smiling more than I had in a long time.

When he made his way toward me, I tried not to be afraid. He stopped just before he reached the fence and shook his giant head.

“I’m sorry our visit was interrupted, but I won’t let the grumpy old man scare me away.” I lowered my voice and said, “Next time, if the doors are closed, I’ll come to the fence. I had trouble opening them, anyway.”

I slowly reached my hand out as I closed my eyes. If he were going to bite me, I would rather not see it coming. My body trembled when I felt his breath as he snorted against my fingers. I opened one eye to peek, and he was just standing there.

Waiting.

“Okay, I get it. I have to make the first move. You men are all alike,” I joked.

I reached out and touched the top of his nose, and he nudged my hand. I let my fingers slide further up his snout to rub between his eyes.

Something startled him, and he reared back, causing me to step back and glare at him. He was like Grayson. Trying to draw me in, but the minute I let my guard down, he changed his mind and pushed me away.

“I already have one ornery male in my life. I don’t need another.”

Turning around, I marched back to the house. Grayson sat at the kitchen table, and I glared at him. His brow pulled between his eyes, and he asked, “What the hell did I do now?”

I rolled my eyes and went to the pantry, pulling out a box of cereal and grabbing the milk from the fridge. I didn’t answer his question because I didn’t have an answer. He hadn’t done anything. His crime was doing something on his own.

I knew I should be happy he was able to get out of bed and into the chair on his own, but I wasn’t because it meant I had one less excuse to put my hands on him.

I wasn’t really angry at him; I was angry at myself.

My time here was limited, and I knew it.

What I wanted to do was throw myself at him and beg him to forgive me for being stupid and pushing him away all these months.

But then I remembered why I was pushing him away, and it just made me angrier.

Because the truth was, I couldn’t put him and his family at risk.

“Jessie?”

“What?” I asked, my eyes focused on the bowl in front of me.

He didn’t answer right away, and I knew he was watching me. His heavy sigh had me looking his way, and the defeat and despair I saw on his face broke my heart.

“What should we focus on today?” he asked.

I wanted to shout at him that he needed to focus on me.

I wanted him to push me and push me, believing I would give in, eventually.

It was unreasonable to expect Grayson to continue to fight for something I had told him over and over again would never happen, but there was a part of me that wanted to be fought for.

When I walked away from my family, no one fought for me. My mother didn’t beg me to stay. My father didn’t demand that I do my duty as his daughter. Even my uncle let me walk away and change my name so I would be separate from him.

Was it too much to ask for someone to show me they truly wanted me? That someone believed I was worth the fight, worth the risk?

“We can move around the house and make sure the chair can get through everywhere so you don’t get stuck. Then tomorrow we can start making things you use daily accessible to your new height.”

All he did was nod before he rolled away. I sat at the table doing my best not to let the tears that were forming in my eyes fall into my bowl.

I failed.