Page 19 of Love Deep

She fiddles with her headscarf and smiles. “We match, Mommy. I love it when we wear the same thing.”

I laugh and scoop up her hand, wondering how long it will be until wearing outfits that match with mine will be the last thing she wants to do. The time is passing by so quickly. Just a second ago, she was the long-awaited, desperately wanted baby in my arms.

She groans. “Don’t get mushy on me, Mom. I knowwhen your eyes go like that, you’re about to say something mushy.”

I nudge her with my elbow. “I’m allowed to be mushy. Mom’s prerogative.”

“Hey, you two!” a woman’s voice calls from behind us.

I spin around, and Rosey’s coming toward us. I haven’t seen her since I went to dinner the other night. The night when I kissed Fisher’s shoulder.

I’ve replayed the evening over and over in my head. I don’t understand how the subject of Riley didn’t come up. I can’t help but wonder what his reaction would have been. It’s not like it makes a difference. Would he have proposed marriage to me if I hadn’t had a kid? No way. So, why am I still thinking about it?

“You two are dressed like twins!” Rosey’s eyes are wide.

“It’s how we like to hang out, isn’t it?” I ask Riley. I hand her my keys. “Why don’t you go and get set up?”

“Thanks, Mom.”

It kind of breaks my heart and fills me with joy at how she takes the keys with such enthusiasm. Even a year ago, she wouldn’t have wanted to go without me. Now, she can’t wait.

“She’s growing so tall,” Rosey says as we watch her sprint toward the back of the old candy store.

“So tall. But better than the opposite.”

Rosey laughs. “Well, I suppose that’s true.”

“Thanks again for dinner the other night. It was such great food. The people up there at the Club are super lucky, eating like that every night.”

“Right?” Rosey asks. “Although sometimes, I just wanna eat Cheetos and M&M’s. But maybe that’s just me.”

“I get it. Sometimes, cheese and crackers is the best meal.”

“Totally.”

I can tell she’s itching to ask me something. Probably about Fisher. It’s not like Rosey to hold back.

“So, it was nice of Fisher to drive you home, right?”

I try and hold back my chuckle. “Super nice. He seems like a really good guy.”

“Areallygood guy,” she says. “And you two have a bit of chemistry.”

I smile. “Maybe.” I sigh. “But, you know, he lives in New York.”

“But so did Byron when I met him,” Rosey says. “You can’t rule him out just because of that. If I’d done that with Byron, we would have never gotten together, and now I’m with the love of my life, and we’re making it work in Star FallsandNew York.”

A rush of shame pushes through my chest. “It’s not just that. I’m a single mom, Rosey.”

“So? Riley’s the best, and Fisher is so kind.”

“Except I didn’t tell him about Riley.” I explain how Riley came out when we were sitting in Byron’s truck, and how Fisher went cold. “And then when he found out… I think he thought I’d deliberately not told him, but that wasn’t the case at all. I don’t know how—because she’s my whole world—but she just didn’t come up.”

“I get it. You don’t have to explain yourself. And no one could doubt your love for your daughter. Fisher has broad shoulders. Literally and figuratively. He won’t hold it against you.”

“But he also doesn’t want to get involved with a single mom in her early thirties who lives in Star Falls, Colorado. I’m sure he gets his pick of women back in New York.”

Rosey puts her hands on her hips. “One thing I’ve learned in this life is you have to back yourself. Because noone else is going to. If Fisher is put off by you being a mom, then screw him.”