Page 10 of Loosened Up for My Bud

“Sharp as ever, Jay.” He pushes them in and out like he’s testing the fit. “Look at that. Pushing back for more.”

I’m so hard it hurts. I’ve never been this turned on in my life. Not with my ex, not with any girl I’ve hooked up with. Nothing has ever come close to this.

But it’s wrong. This is Stone. My buddy. The guy I eat pizza and play video games with. Who I bitch about Coach to. These same fingers were shoving Cheetos in my mouth just a few hours ago.

I have to stop this. Before it goes any further. Before I lose control completely.

“Stone,” I gasp out as he twists his fingers. “This—ah!—this is—you shouldn’t—fuck—we can’t… we can’t do this.”

His free hand squeezes the meat of my ass cheek. “You’re right. We shouldn’t.” He doesn’t stop. If anything, he goes deeper. “But that ass of yours is begging for it, man. I’ve never seen anything like it.”

He’s right. My body is begging for it. Every fiber of my being is screaming, “Yes, more, please.” But my brain… my brain is having a fucking meltdown. I’m not gay. I’m not. It’s always been girls. Cheerleaders, sorority chicks, the cute barista at the coffee shop.

But then… I’ve also never had anyone do this to me. No girl I’ve been with has ever shown any interest in my ass, other than the occasional appreciative squeeze. This is uncharted territory.

Before I can make a decision, before I can figure out what the hell I want, Stone pulls his fingers out.

The emptiness that follows is immediate. Devastating. A sudden, gaping void. I make a sound I’m not proud of.

“What—why’d you stop?”

“You literally just said we can’t do this.” He straightens up, backing away a step. “And I agree.”

I push myself up and turn around. I know my face is a mess. Sweaty, flushed, my pupils probably blown wide. I don’t even bother trying to hide my erection anymore. There’s no point. It’s right there, tenting my compression shorts, a traitor to its cause.

But I’m not the only one.

Stone’s shorts are in the same state. A massive bulge pressing against the fabric, a wet spot at the tip that looks even bigger than mine. I stare, my mouth dry. I’ve seen him naked before, of course. In the locker room. In the showers. I’ve seen him soft, half-hard. But I’ve never seen him like this. Fully, achingly hard.Because of me.

“You’re…” I start, but I don’t know how to finish.

“Yeah, no shit.” He adjusts himself, wincing. “Don’t act so surprised.” He gestures at my own hard-on. “It’s not like you’re exactly unaffected.”

I open my mouth. Close it. I have no defense for that.

“And you wanna know the worst part?” he continues. “I had this urge to…” He cuts himself off, shaking his head. “It was bad. I wanted to—” He makes a gesture that’s somewhere between a fist pump and a pelvic thrust.

“To what?”

“To fuck you, Jay.” The words come out stripped of any of his usual cocky humor. He looks as shocked as I am that he actuallysaid it out loud. “Right here. Over your bed. I wanted to put my dick inside you.”

My stomach clenches. A hot, panicked fear wars with a dark, thrilling curiosity. I should be disgusted. Repulsed. I should be punching him in the face right now.

But I’m not.

“I won’t, though,” he says, backing up another step. He drags a hand through his sweat-damp hair, leaving it standing in messy spikes. “Of course I won’t. That—fuck, that would be fucking weird. Right?”

“Right,” I manage, the word feeling like sandpaper in my throat. My eyes keep flicking down to his erection, then up to his face, then back down. There’s nothing I want more in this world than for him to take back everything he just said and do exactly what he described.

“But… damn. The way you were bent over… all open and wanting… I thought you were gonna ask for it.”

“Ask for it?”

“Yeah. You were making noises, man. And you were pushing back. For a second there, I thought… well, you know. I thought that you wanted to take it further.”

The emptiness is still there. A phantom ache where the plug used to be. Where his fingers used to be. My body is screaming for something to fill me up, for him specifically to fill me up.

“Would it… would it bethatweird?” I hear myself ask. The daredevil is back, and he’s steering this car straight into a wall.