Page 9 of Librarian for the Jock
Chapter Nine
PAIGE
I’d known who Chet was when Brad introduced us at the church because Brandon had told me, but I still didn’t really remember him from our childhood until I saw Brad and Chet together, when it finally clicked. I remember despising Brad’s summer friend so much that I blocked him from my memory. I looked straight at Brad, ignoring Chet,“Is Chet the same kid that you played pirates with and stole my jewelry, then buried it and forgot where you buried it because the map you made was useless?”
All eyes were on us. Brad’s eyes went round like saucers. My kids start snickering. They always thought Uncle Brad was the coolest and funniest guy ever.
“Woah, I forgot about that! Hey, we were just 10 years old then. And we didn’t steal it, we borrowed it.”
“Brad, the word “borrow” implies that you’re going to give something back when you’re done with it. I never got it back.”
I turned to Chet then. “As I recall, that whole pirate game was your idea.”
Chet struggled to find the right words, “It was not my idea to borrow your jewelry.” He looked helplessly at my brother then back at me.
I stared Chet down, perhaps a bit too harshly, but I found myself enjoying a little bit making the fancy football hero squirm a little. “I remember you hiding from me for the rest of the summer. Did Brad ever tell you that the necklace you lost had been my grandmother’s? A necklace she had given to me before she passed? And that she had gotten it from her mother?”
Chet looked horrified. His head drooped and he stared at the ground. “No, he didn’t tell me that.”
Chet, the guy I now had a crush on, was the same person who had innocently "borrowed" and lost my jewelry while playing pirates with Brad when they were children. The rush of mixed emotions and the ferociousness of the memory not only surprised me but reignited the frustration and anger I had felt back then when something so important to me was taken away. Neither Brad nor Chet knew that I had cried for days after they had lost my grandmother’s necklace. It had been all that I had left of her, the woman I’d loved so fiercely and been named for.
I took a deep breath and pulled myself out of that memory and back to the present. I reminded myself that it was the Sabbath and that this happened almost 20 years ago. As I pulled myself together, I looked up to find everyone’s eyes on me.
Brad’s face turned serious and he said quietly, “I’m sorry, Paige; I forgot about that. We had no idea how important the jewelry, especially the necklace, was to you. We were so young then. I’m really sorry.”
Olivia came quickly to my side and gave me a big hug. She’s the sister I’ve always wanted and I’m so grateful that Brad found her.
She whispered, “I’ll make sure those two make it right! Even after all these years.” She hugged me again.
“Thank you Olivia, you are the best.”
“You guys are still coming for our weekly dinner tonight, right?” she asked me. “Chet will be coming too. Right, Chet?”
“Yes, I plan on being there.” His tone was sheepish.
Before I could say anything, my kids answered for me. Jenny rushed over to hug Olivia, looking up at her lovingly. “Aunty Olivia, you know we never miss out on your delicious cooking!”
Brandon then looked at his Uncle Brad and then at Chet. “I wouldn’t miss this dinner for anything. Can we toss a football around for a bit too? Please?”
Brad looked at Chet, then back at Brandon. “That sounds like a great idea, Brandon.” Chet just nodded. Apparently he didn’t trust himself to speak. I was still mute, so I just nodded at Olivia.
“Great! See everyone at 5pm!” Olivia said, her tone light.
On the way home I was silent while my kids chattered about dinner tonight. Brandon was really excited to have dinner with his idol and Jenny loved how handsome Chet was.
My head was spinning. What the heck had just happened? My feelings and emotions were all over the place. I had already decided that Chet wasn’t right for me before today, so what was the problem? Why couldn’t my mind convince my heart?
By the time we got home, I was exhausted again. “Kids, I’m gonna take a nap,” I mumbled as we walked in the front door. “We will leave for Uncle Brad’s and Aunty Olivia’s at 4:45 pm. Please do your best to behave yourselves and get along until then.”
“Okay, Mommy.”
I headed up to my room and crashed for most of the afternoon.
I was full of nervous energy as we drove to Brad and Olivia’s house for dinner. I reminded myself to stay cool and not to let ( very ) old grudges color the entire evening. Deep down, I knew that facing Chet would be a test of my ability to balance the past with the present. Could I look at him and see only the person he is now, or would the shadow of the little boy who had lost something so precious to me loom too large? I needed to blame someone and it couldn’t be my brother, because he was too important to me then. I’d blamed Chet then and, clearly, I was doing it now. I knew it wasn’t fair, but it somehow seemed easier.
As I pulled into the driveway, I took a deep breath. It's just dinner, I told myself. An evening of smiles, shared meals, and familial warmth. I could do this. But beneath it all, the question remained—would tonight bring closure, or would old wounds prove too deep to ignore?
I believed that I was a mature, forgiving woman. This was all so petty, old news. I vowed to forgive and forget, not even bring it up. If I didn’t have anything nice to say, I would not say anything at all. Be nice, Paige! I told myself sternly.
Chet was already there, tossing a ball around with Brad in the front yard, when we got to my brother’s house. I had barely put the car in park when Brandon jumped out of the backseat and ran over to join the guys. I smiled. It was nice to see my teenage son excited like he used to be when he was young.
When I went in the house to see if Olivia needed any help with dinner, she told me she was almost done and sent me outside to enjoy the cool evening breeze. Mom was entertaining Lexi and Olivia joined them when she came out. Jenny was watching the guys so I sat beside her with my book. Yes, I’m one of those librarians who always carried a book just in case I found an opportunity to read. When I needed to get out of my head, a book was the best way for me to do it.
I was just starting to get sucked into my book when I heard a loud gasp. “Mommy, look! Now that’s a body worthy of having his shirt off,” Jenny said awestruck.
I looked up from my book to see Brad, Brandon, and Chet still tossing around the football in the front yard. It took a second to register that Chet had taken off his shirt as they played and that his body was incredible. He had beautifully developed abs, and I suddenly found myself wanting to be wrapped up in his huge, muscled arms. I realized that I was staring, hard, with my mouth open. When I was caught by my brother and a very bemused Chet, I immediately looked back down at my book. Thankfully, Brandon seemed not to notice that his mother was acting like a teenage girl.
“Jenny, don’t stare!” I knew it was hypocritical to say, but I said it anyway.
“Mommy, what’s wrong with looking at a beautiful man?”
She was right, of course. There was nothing wrong with looking at a beautiful man. I’d never had a preteen daughter before and definitely never had thoughts like the ones she just expressed when I was her age. I hadn’t even noticed the boys around me then. Then again, I had never seen a man like Chet when I was her age. At the moment, though, I was more worried about the mayhem going on in my own mind. I hadn’t thought I could still feel the things I was feeling after my ex-husband had left us. Breathe, Paige, breathe.
“You’re right, my love, we should enjoy the beautiful things around us,” I said slowly. What in the world am I saying? “We just need to be careful of how we express our thoughts about beauty in the opposite sex, or it could be taken wrong.”
“He’s so handsome.”
“I suppose so. He’s just so much younger than I am, I hadn’t thought to look at him that way.”
“Really? How old is he? Let’s Google it.” She fumbled with her phone. “ESPN, a trusted site, says he’s 29 years old. That’s only a 6-year difference, Mom. Doesn’t age become, like, ‘just a number when we get older? At what age does that happen?”
Sheesh, this is what happens when you raise a smart child, it backfires on you.
“Honey, that’s a really great question and I honestly don’t have the answer. Does Google have an answer for that? All I know is that I was six years old when he was born. When I graduated from college with my Masters degree in Library and Information Science, he was just graduating from high school. He’s just too young for me.”
Of course, as I was rambling off all the reasons I couldn’t date Chet to my daughter, she wasn’t listening, thankfully. She was too busy searching “when does age become nothing but a number?” on her phone’s web browser.
“So, according to my research,” she finally said triumphantly, “the idea that ‘age is just a number’ is an excuse people use to justify their actions. Age matters more when it comes to health and other boring stuff. So, here is my honest thinking, Mommy. Does it really matter if a man is younger than you if he is kind, responsible, fun, and handsome? And you are both in good health?”
Goodness, how is this 11-year-old so wise for her age? “I guess you’re right, sweetheart. Are you trying to play matchmaker?” I asked suspiciously.
She gave me the biggest grin, “Maybe. I really like Chet, Mommy.”
I couldn’t help but laugh at her honesty, and at how much of this ‘honesty’ was based on the existence of Chet’s good looks. “I agree, Chet is really nice, but let’s not force things. Let things happen naturally, if they’re supposed to happen at all.”
Jenny nodded her head, but I could tell she wasn’t listening, as usual. I had a feeling that I’d better stay alert for any shenanigans.
Having this conversation with Jenny, ridiculous as it had been, had made me realize that I’d clearly forgiven Chet for what he and Brad had done to me when they were children. I didn’t need Chet figuring out that all he had to do to get me to forgive him was to take off his shirt though. This was hysterically bad. When was dinner going to start? Why was I so nervous? I had better sit as far away from Chet as possible.