Page 25 of Librarian for the Jock

Chapter Twenty-Five

PAIGE

Leaning against the kitchen counter with a cup of chamomile lavender tea in my hands that I had barely touched, I pondered the day. The party was over, the kids were getting ready for bed, and the house was finally quiet. The faint sounds of crickets outside were the only noise, and for a moment, I just stood there, letting the calm settle around me.

But my mind wasn’t calm. It raced, filled with thoughts of the night, of Chet’s smile, the way he held me close, the warmth in his eyes when we danced, like I was the only person in the room. The way he made me feel… like I mattered in a way I hadn’t felt in years. I could still hear the softness in his voice when he thanked everyone, when he looked right into my eyes and spoke like he was saying something just for me.

I took a deep breath, trying to steady myself, yet I felt a pang of panic. What was I doing? I was a mom, juggling work, raising two kids on my own, trying to hold everything together… and he was Chet Bennett, a famous professional football player. Charming, smart, talented, funny, sweet Chet, who could have his pick of anyone, who was used to a fast-paced life that was worlds apart from this little town.

I sighed, shaking my head. No, it was better to keep things simple. But even as I thought it, I knew I was fighting a losing battle. There was a part of me that was already hooked, already imagining *what if*.

I took another deep breath, running a hand through my hair, and forced myself to think logically. *This is just a phase*, I told myself. *It’s the excitement of the party, the rush of adrenaline. It doesn’t mean anything. You’re just caught up in the moment. It’s not practical. You don’t have time for this. For him.*

But even as I thought it, I knew I was lying to myself. I couldn’t ignore the way he made me feel, the way he made my kids laugh, the way he looked at me like I was the most important person in the world. But that was the problem, wasn’t it? He made me feel special, and that was terrifying.

I shook my head, trying to banish the thought. *You’ve been on your own for years, Paige. You’ve managed just fine. Don’t complicate things.*

I was still lost in thought when I heard footsteps behind me. I turned to see Jenny and Brandon standing in the doorway, their eyes wide and curious. They had clearly sensed something, picked up on my distracted mood.

“Hey, you two,” I said, trying to sound cheerful. “Shouldn’t you be in bed?”

Jenny walked over, a sly grin on her face. “We were just coming to say goodnight, but you look like you’re thinking about something serious.”

Brandon nodded, always quick to catch on. “Yeah, like something’s on your mind. Is everything okay, Mom?”

“Just thinking about the party and how great it was.”

Jenny agreed, her eyes wide and sparkling. “That really was the best party Hawthorn Hideaway has ever had!”

Brandon nodded eagerly, his grin stretching from ear to ear. “Yeah! And the dance-off was awesome! Chet was so much fun. Don’t you think, Mom?”

I smiled, my heart warming at their enthusiasm. “I’m glad you guys had so much fun. A huge part of all the fun was because of the two of you,” I said softly, trying to steer the conversation away from the direction I knew it was going. “I am so blessed to be your mother.”

But Jenny wasn’t letting me off the hook that easily. She gave me a sly look, her eyes narrowing just slightly. “Mommy, something else is on your mind. What is it?”

I laughed lightly, trying to brush it off. “I’m fine, just a bit tired from the party. It was a lot of fun, but it was a long day.”

Jenny didn’t buy it for a second. She tilted her head, her grin widening. “Or maybe… you’re thinking about Chet?”

I felt a blush creeping up my neck, and I rolled my eyes playfully. “Oh, come on, guys. It was just a party, and yes, I danced with Chet, but that’s all.”

Brandon exchanged a look with Jenny, and they both moved closer, clearly not ready to drop the subject. “But you like him, right, Mommy?” Jenny asked, her tone softer now. “We saw how you were looking at each other. You guys looked really happy together.”

Brandon nodded vigorously. “Yeah, it was like you two were meant to be together! You were smiling so much, Mom. I was really little when I last remember you smiling like that. I love seeing you that happy.”

I felt my cheeks flush, a little shocked by that comment. Brandon remembered me happy and in love with his father. I had forgotten what that felt like. I tried to laugh it off. “Oh, come on, you two. It was just a dance. We were all having fun, that’s all.”

Jenny wasn’t buying it. She stepped closer, her face earnest. “Mommy, you like him, don’t you? I mean, really like him.”

I swallowed, caught off guard by her directness. I set down my cup of tea and leaned back against the counter, feeling cornered in the best possible way. “It’s not that simple, sweetie. I… I do like him, Chet’s… he’s great, but it’s complicated. He’s got his own life, and I’ve got mine. We’re in different worlds, and he has a different kind of life. A life that doesn’t really fit with ours.”

Brandon frowned a little, looking confused. “But why does that matter? He’s here now, right? And he’s always around, spending time with us. Doesn’t that mean he wants to be part of our world?”

I blinked, taken aback by his insight. “Maybe… but honey, it’s just temporary. His career and life aren’t in Hawthorn Hideaway. He’ll have to leave again to fulfill his work contracts. Long-distance relationships are hard, and in my opinion, impossible.”

Jenny stepped closer, her expression earnest. “Mommy, everyone makes choices. But if you don’t give it a chance, how will you ever know?”

I sighed, feeling the weight of their words settle on my shoulders. “I just… I don’t want to get hurt. And I don’t want you two to get hurt, either. We’ve been on our own for so long, and it’s been okay.”

Brandon shrugged. “But what if it could be better than okay?”

Jenny nodded, her eyes softening. “Mommy, we love Chet. He’s fun, and he makes you happy. We see it. And he really cares about you.”

I felt a lump forming in my throat. “It’s not that simple, sweetheart. Relationships can be… tricky. And I don’t want to make things harder for you two. You’re my priority.”

Jenny stepped even closer, reaching for my hand. “Mommy, you’re our priority too. We just want you to be happy. And we know Chet makes you happy.”

My heart squeezed painfully in my chest. I looked down at my kids, both of them watching me with such open, hopeful expressions. How could I explain that I was scared? That I had built a wall around my heart for so long, and I was terrified of what it meant to let someone in again?

I felt my heart twist, torn between fear and hope. “I know, but… what if it’s just a crush, or just the excitement of him being here? What if it doesn’t last?”

Jenny looked at me, her expression more mature than I was ready for. “And what if it does, Mommy? What if it lasts and it’s amazing? Don’t you want to find out?”

I swallowed hard, feeling the tears prickling at the corners of my eyes. “I am happy,” I said, but my voice was wavering, even to my own ears. “I just don’t want to mess things up. I just… I don’t want to make a mistake.”

Brandon tilted his head, reached out and grabbed my hand, squeezing it tight, his brows furrowing. “Sometimes mistakes are good, Mom. They help you figure out what’s right. And we think Chet’s the right man for you.”

I blinked, surprised by his wisdom. I realized that maybe they were right. Maybe I was just scared of what was new, of what felt so big and unknown.

Jenny squeezed my other hand, her eyes pleading, her voice filled with quiet determination. “Just give it a chance, Mommy. Please. For you. For us. You deserve to be happy.”

I sighed, feeling the fight draining out of me, replaced by something softer, something more hopeful. I looked at my kids—these two incredible little humans who were so much wiser than I had ever realized—and I felt a shift in my heart. Maybe they were right. Maybe I had been so focused on protecting myself and them that I had forgotten what it felt like to really live.

I nodded slowly, my voice barely a whisper. “Okay. I’ll think about it. I promise.”

The kids both cheered, throwing their arms around me in a tight hug. I closed my eyes, feeling their warmth, their love, and for the first time, I let myself imagine what it would be like to take that leap, to see where this thing with Chet could go.

As I held my kids close, I found myself smiling through the tears that had been threatening to fall, feeling a flicker of excitement, of hope in the pit of my stomach that maybe… just maybe… they were onto something. Something new, something beautiful. Maybe, just maybe, they were right.