Page 8 of Librarian for the Jock

Chapter Eight

CHET

What in the world happened today at the library? As I sat on my grandparent’s porch watching the sunset, I tried to gather my thoughts. I couldn’t help a frustration clawing at the edges of my mind. Paige had me stumbling over my words and questioning my every move. It was a far cry from the confidence I usually exuded, especially around women. These past few days this woman magnet, Chet Bennett, had been a bumbling fool around a lady.

Paige was different from other women. Every time I approached her or attempted to start a conversation today, she politely excused herself to attend to another person or a seemingly important responsibility. Was it possible a beautiful woman was avoiding me? That would be a first.

Was her intelligence, which I found hugely attractive, making her immune to my charms–she was a librarian after all? I worried that the stereotype of the stupid jock might be a turn-off to her. I’ve been dealing with that stereotype my whole life.

And then there's the age gap. She’s definitely older than me if she’s Brad’s older sister, though I don’t know by how much. It shouldn’t matter, but it felt like she was light-years ahead of me in terms of maturity and life experience. She carried herself with such poise and grace, while I felt like a fumbling teenager without any future goals.

On top of it all, my fame wasn’t always helpful. I was accustomed to the adoration and attention that came with being a star at something, but serious women have never really taken me seriously. Paige, on the other hand, seemed unfazed by my fame and unimpressed by what I do for a living. This was disorienting to say the least, and I found myself in uncharted territory. And, she seemed completely immune to my charms.

The worst part is not knowing why things are so different with Paige. The thought that she was avoiding me gnaws at the edges of my consciousness. It was certainly a blow to my ego that a woman as captivating as her seemed to have no interest in me. Right or wrong, I was used to women throwing themselves at me on a regular basis. Who had I become to be so arrogant, to think it inconceivable that a woman would be entirely uninterested in me? Baba would be so disappointed in me.

Bottom line, Paige was not like anyone I'd ever met before, and it really frustrated me that I couldn’t seem to keep her attention. I was left questioning the strategies that always worked for me in the past. Now what did I do? My guess was that I needed to ditch the smooth talk, since she’s too smart for that approach. It seemed that I had to do something I was not used to doing. Be patient. Unfortunately, patience has never been my strong suit. This was going to be mega-challenging for this chunk of hunk! Ha! I crack myself up. Yes, I was an idiot, but this charming idiot usually got the girl!

OK–maybe instead of flexing my muscles, I should try humor. Laughter was the best medicine, right? Who knows, maybe Paige would appreciate a guy who made her snort-laugh louder than a stadium full of fans. Hey, it was worth a shot, right?

I just wanted to find someone who allowed me to be me. No mask. The guy behind the helmet and the fame. Very few women knew how much I loved the library and books. I desperately wanted to share not only that love, but also my vulnerabilities, my passions, and my true self. How the heck did I do that?

I woke up on Sunday morning with a sense of purpose. Today was the day I would seek guidance from a higher power. This was a task for the big guy above because Paige was beyond my natural capabilities. I decided to attend the church my grandparents used to take me when I visited them. The people had always been very nice and the church itself made me feel peaceful and calm.

I stood in front of my closet, remembering how Baba had always insisted that I wear my Sunday best to church. I carefully selected a crisp white shirt and a neatly pressed pink tie. Real men wear pink. I wondered if Paige would be at church too. Something about her mannerisms and her kindness, made me think that she was a God-fearing woman.

Just the thought of Paige made me fumble with my tie and I couldn't shake the nerves that fluttered in my stomach. Sheesh, what was wrong with me? Even the tie felt tighter than usual, as if it were trying to strangle my resolve. I pushed the feeling aside, reminding myself of the importance of the task at hand. Today wasn't just about attending church; it was about finding the strength to be myself around a woman I really wanted to know, even if I wasn’t so sure she wanted to know me.

As I walked through the doors of the church, memories flooded my mind. The first memory was of Baba holding my hand, looking me in the eyes and telling me, “God knows you. He knows your thoughts, wishes and desires. Most importantly, He LOVES you. Always remember that, my dear Chet. God loves you and is always there for you in your good and bad times. He will never forget you, so don’t you forget him!”

My grandmother would be disappointed to learn that I didn’t always go to church, but I hoped she’d appreciate that I always had a prayer in my heart like she taught me. I also did my best to be kind, serve others, and overall be a good guy. I’m far from perfect, Baba, but I am here today and in desperate need of guidance . Suddenly I felt her love and I knew she understood what I was asking.

Kind smiles and warm hellos greeted me as I walked into the chapel. I glanced around, searching for a place to sit where I could both observe the room and be less of a distraction. I settled into a pew near the back of the chapel, next to the wall. How well could I blend into that wall? Hmm, perhaps the pink tie was the wrong choice if I’d hoped to disappear.

I heard a familiar voice calling out my name. Turning, I caught sight of Brad, his wife Olivia, and Lexi. Brad gave me a brief hug, “Good to see you here! I’ll catch you after. Olivia hates being late and I slowed us down this morning so I gotta stay on her good side.”

I watched as he hurried to catch up with his family as they headed toward the front of the chapel where his mom was sitting. Then I saw her. Paige and her children were sitting in the same pew as Brad's family. It was a curious coincidence, one that sent a ripple through my thoughts. What was I missing here? Had they intentionally chosen to sit together, or was it merely chance?

Paige looked beautiful, a beacon of light in the room, yet she seemed distant, as if lost in her own world. She was wearing a delicate light pink dress, its soft hue complementing Paige’s complexion with an ethereal glow that accentuated her features.

As they sat, waiting for the service to start, her children nestled close to her side, their heads bowed in reverence. There was a tenderness in the way she interacted with them, a warmth that softened the edges of her guarded demeanor. It was a sight that stirred something within me, a longing to understand the mysteries of fate and coincidence.

The service began and I closed my eyes and let the music and prayer touch my heart and soul. I listened intently to the experiences and testimonies that were shared hoping that somewhere in the talks, I would find the inspiration I so desperately sought.

Then someone quoted, “that which is of God inviteth and enticeth to do good continually; wherefore, every thing which inviteth and enticeth to do good, and to love God, and to serve him, is inspired of God.”

That’s it! A good man that loves and serves. Each word the speaker spoke resonated with me, as if it were speaking directly to the doubts and fears that lingered in my mind. As I listened, a sense of clarity began to wash over me, and by the end I felt a newfound sense of peace that everything would be okay. Armed with this newfound clarity and insight, I knew I had gained something valuable–an understanding of the kind of man I wanted to be. I knew that when the time was right to approach Paige, I would find the words to speak to her from the heart, to show her the depth of my feelings in a way that transcended mere charm.

Deep in thought about all that was discussed during sacrament and class, I headed out of the church building.

“Chet!” I heard Brad call out to me.

I turned and saw him with his family and mom. He waved at me to come over. I headed over and greeted his mom, Aunty Pam, with a hug and a kiss.

“Chet! You’ve grown up well,” she gushed. “You’re so handsome. And look at all these muscles!” She felt my biceps and I blushed. Sometimes being around adults that have known you since childhood was just a little awkward. This definitely felt like one of those times.

“Aunty Pam, I never told you this,” I said, hoping to change the subject. “But I used to beg my mom to let me stay in Hawthorn at the end of every break, just so I could have you as my teacher when school started. Mom always told me no.” I chuckled. “I was always envious of the kids who told me what a great teacher you were.”

“Oh, Chet, that is so sweet of you. I would have loved having you as one of my students. I don’t know if you realized it but during the summers, I often provided ‘learning opportunities’ for the two of you, most of which were science experiments, if you remember.”

“I remember! They were so fun! Especially if they blew up.” Brad and I started laughing.

Brad turned and waved at someone, “Paige! Come, I wanna introduce you to my childhood summer buddy.”

Why would Brad want to introduce me to Paige? Was I that obvious in checking her out? Clearly, I was missing something. I turned to watch Paige walk toward us.

She looked enchanting, like a vision from a dream, her hair cascading in gentle waves around her shoulders. Her pale pink dress hugged her figure in all the right places, accentuating every movement she made. There was an air of elegance about her, a quiet confidence that drew me in like a moth to a flame.

In that moment, everything else faded into the background. All I could see was her. It was as if time stood still and the world around us ceased to exist. It was about as cheesy as anyone could imagine. Maybe more.

I felt a flutter in my chest, a mixture of awe and admiration. How could someone be so effortlessly captivating? It was like she possessed a kind of magic that left me spellbound in her presence. What was happening to me?

Her eyes widened, and then hardened just a little when she saw me. Her children were right behind her. Brandon’s eyes lit up when he saw me. At least her son was happy to see me.

“Paige, this is my friend Chet. I was telling you about him, remember? He used to come every summer until football camps took over in high school. Maybe you remember him hanging out at our house during the summers, before you took off to college?”

“Chet, this is my older sister, Paige. I don’t know if you remember her. She liked to tell us to go away and ignored us all the time.” Brad started laughing.

Paige and I just stared at each other.