Page 6

CHAPTER 6

L ovie stared unseeing out the window. Every one of her senses was much too focused on relishing Law’s hand resting on her thigh. She loved that he had left it there. Somehow, it grounded her. As she ran her thumb over the bruises covering his knuckles and hand, she replayed the last few minutes in her mind, committing them to memory.

After wrapping his impossibly large hands around her waist, holding her steady with long, thick, masculine fingers, he’d lifted her into his truck with no apparent trouble, as if she hadn’t gained those extra fifteen pounds over the past four years. Not giving her time to recover, he’d reached across her to buckle her seatbelt.

What would it feel like if his arm skimmed her breast? Her nipples peaked at the thought, and it was all she could do not to untuck her burnished, teak-colored hair from behind her ear to create a barrier to shield her face. The last thing she needed was for him to ask why she was blushing.

Not that she would untuck it anyway, since he was the one who had run his finger along her long bangs to tuck it there. Then her lungs lost the ability to process oxygen when he leaned in and pressed his lips to her forehead. Her Viking had a firm, decisive way about him. She had encountered many types of men in her life. This was a man who knew what he wanted and pursued it without apologies.

What would it be like to live that way? To know yourself so well and trust yourself completely. He didn’t second-guess himself. He probably never had negative voices chattering away in that handsome Viking head of his. They wouldn’t dare, unlike hers. Her voices were on constant autopilot, scrutinizing her every move as if they were Sunday morning quarterbacks.

And the way her brain worked, she could self-analyze and criticize with pinpoint accuracy.

If only she had a way to turn off that part of herself and just… be. Be happy. Be sad. Be angry. Be whatever she was, without filtering her emotions through how they would affect others or come back to bite her. Living her life for other people was exhausting. She was tired of what-if’ing herself to death.

She loved taking care of Zane as he grew up. He was her whole world. But to be honest, sometimes she felt like the seawall that kept the storm surges of their lives at bay. Her step father Phillip was a storm surge the size of a tsunami—one horrendous, never-ending tsunami—and she was tired of being battered. Just thinking about it exhausted her and left her hopeless. And even the toughest seawall can eventually crack.

That’s what she’d done at some point over the past four years. She’d cracked. And now she couldn’t protect anyone. If the General found out what she’d actually done, she wasn’t even sure she could protect herself.

Without thinking, she ran the tip of her tongue along her bottom lip. A deep gravelly rumble thrummed from the driver's side of the cab. Had her Viking just growled at her? Did Vikings growl?

At some point, she had to ask him for his name. It was obvious he wasn’t going to volunteer the information. She could try to guess, but she really sucked at guessing games. He didn’t look like a Sven or a Bjorn. A giggle bubbled out of her at the thought of her Viking in a chef’s apron and hat like that Swedish chef Muppet, running around all, “hurdy gurty furdy lurdy” and waving a meat cleaver.

Her laughter faded as her Viking glanced at her, raising an eyebrow. “Is there something amusing you’d like to share with the class?”

Her eyes snapped wide, and she shook her head. Hard. Instinctively, she reached for her backpack. She had packed her friends in there, right? When everything had gone crazy at Graceview Estates, she acted so fast. She’d had a lot on her mind, but she wouldn’t have left without them. But she couldn’t recall actually putting them inside her pack.

What would she do if she’d left them? She’d have to sneak back into the compound somehow and rescue them. She wasn’t sure exactly how her Viking would feel about that, but she couldn’t leave her friends in that awful place. Leaving them there, away from her, wasn’t an option. They would be scared without her.

Jiggling her knee, she gazed out the window again, rubbing her thumb over his knuckle. Without turning to face him, she said, “I feel kind of silly calling you Viking all the time.”

“Why do you do it then? Is my name frightening?”

She made googly eyes at him, which he did not seem to appreciate. “Um, I’m not sure what else to call you. I don’t know your name.”

“What are you talking about? Of course, I—” She giggled at his look of utter disbelief as he trailed off. “Hm. Well, I don’t suppose I did, did I?”

And then he laughed- truly laughed. Not snickered. Not chortled. Laughed.

It was the most wonderful and infectious sound she had ever heard. She joined in, laughing until her stomach muscles protested and tears of joy streamed down her face. Those didn’t count as crying.

Even as he continued racing toward their destination, he ran his fingers through the back of her hair and pulled her closer. He leaned in and rested his forehead against hers.

It only lasted a second, but she would never forget it as long as she lived. His skin was warm, even in the January cold. His fingers flexed before he let her go and her heartbeat dropped to her pussy.

No one had ever touched her like that. Perhaps no one would ever again. The touch might not mean much to anyone else, but it meant everything to her. And when her life returned to normal, whatever the new normal might be, she’d have that moment to look back on and cherish.

“Right. I'm Lawson Young, but my friends call me Law.”

She extended her hand to shake his. “Pleased to meet you, Law.”

He reached for her hand but ended up taking her fingers instead. Turning her hand over, he pressed a soft, warm kiss onto her knuckles. At first, she could only stare. Pulling her hand back, she turned to the window and gazed at the landscape whizzing by.

She needed a moment to recenter her thoughts and calm her racing heartbeat. In all the places it now throbbed.

Snow blanketed the dips and shaded patches of ground as she and Law made their way to his house. Holy sausage rollies! She was on her way to Law’s home. Just her and her Law. And hopefully, her two best friends. They had to be in her backpack. But what if they weren’t?

Had it truly been just a little while since he’d found her in that office and rescued her from the Society? It felt like a lifetime ago. Without realizing it, she unzipped her backpack and slipped her hand inside. The moment the soft fur brushed her fingertips, breathing became easier.

Neither she nor Law had spoken since he kissed the back of her hand. He appeared lost in his own thoughts. He probably wouldn’t notice if she kept her hand in her bag.

What Buzzy and Owlbert really wanted was a hug, just to settle their nerves. They’d been through a lot today, what with sneaking out of her room, breaking into the office, and being rescued by a Viking. Her stuffies had quite a day. They needed a big hug to feel better. She couldn’t take them out, though, not with Law sitting right there.

If he’s a Daddy, he won’t think you’re crazy.

But what if he wasn’t? He had no idea she was a Little. She hadn’t revealed that side of herself. She kept her Little self very well hidden. If only she could let her Little out, it would be much easier to relax. Little Lovie never worried about things the way Lovelyn did.

A sigh escaped before she could catch it. He glanced at her, questioning her with his eyes. Why did she let out such a big, honking sigh? Why couldn’t she have just farted or something? Nobody would question you about a fart.

Fortunately, she was a master of distraction. “Um, I want to check on Zane. Why can’t we go see him?”

“You heard Reid just like I did, kitten. Bones wants him to have uninterrupted rest for a day or two. I know it’s hard, but we’ll find things to do. As soon as Bones gives the go-ahead, we’ll head straight there. In the meantime, I’ll call, and you can speak to the nurse.”

“I don’t even know who Bones is. Why do we have to listen to him?”

“Bones is what the brothers at Sabre Security call him, fairy cat. It comes from his time in the military as an emergency field surgeon. Most people call him Doctor Preston. He is the Chief Doctor in the ER, where he sees patients and trains new doctors. I promise, he’s qualified to look after Zane.”

She nodded and bit her lip. What she wanted was to stomp her feet, cross her arms, and threaten to hold her breath until Law took her to see her brother. The desire to hold Buzzy and Owlbert gnawed at her soul.

Her stuffies weren’t used to this kind of rejection. They hadn’t seen each other in a very long time. And there had been running and shooting and things exploding all over the place. It had been super scary.

She, uh, they shouldn’t let their strong feelings control them. There was no excuse. But they’d know as soon as they saw her that she was okay. That was what she, um, they needed. All of them.

She settled for sticking her hand further in her pack and rubbing Buzzy’s soft fur. The tightness in her chest eased just a smidgen. Not as much as if she could hold them, but maybe she could make do until they were at his house.

The house she was going to with her Viking, who had already saved her life at least twice. He held her hand and even kissed her forehead. Those were things a Daddy might do. Not to mention the several times he’d already threatened to spank her. Not that he would really do that.

But he’d been around her for hours, and he didn't seem to mind too much. Oddly enough, he understood her in ways no one else ever had. He’d also taken care of Zane, when she hadn’t even known her brother was nearby.

So, whether it was the bizarre circumstances surrounding their meeting, or fate, or something else entirely… she knew she was precisely where she was meant to be at this moment. Right now, she was destined to be with her Viking.

Imagining that captivated her so deeply that she startled when Law spoke. “Who are you loving on in your backpack, babygirl?”

Argh! Snatching her hand from her bag, she tugged the zipper up. She didn’t catch any fur in the zipper, did she? Of course, he’d notice her. She sensed he was the type who would notice everything, whether she wanted him to or not.

“It’s no one, Viking. I was just checking to make sure I brought everything important when we left.”

He nodded and adjusted his rearview mirror. “I see. That’s a shame. I’ve watched you playing with two stuffies for days now, and I was really hoping to meet them. But I guess I’ll have to keep waiting.”

He had seen her with Buzzy and Owlbert? Wait, he had been watching her for days? She tried to recall everything she had done over the past few days. The screen in her mind displayed nothing but static. Hopefully, it hadn’t been too embarrassing.

Oh god! She never worried about keeping her Little inside when she was alone. Bending over, she cupped her face in her hands. If he wasn’t a Daddy, he probably thought she was insane. If he was a Daddy, well… if he was a Daddy, she had no idea what he thought.

Without lifting her face from her knees, she asked, “Did you send Zane to be with someone else because you don’t think he’s safe around me?” Panic caused her to straighten. “I’m not crazy. I promise. I never act like that. Not really. If you’ll let me see Zane, I’ll never do anything like that again. I promise.”

She scanned his face for censure or disbelief, but all she could see was concern. “Hey! What's all this, fairy cat? I would never try to keep you away from your brother. No one thinks you’re crazy, especially not me. I think you are brave. I believe you love people more deeply and truly than anyone I’ve ever known. And I think you’re adorable.”

He sounded like he meant what he said. She didn’t see any evidence of his lying in his body language.

“Listen to me, Lovelyn. I don’t lie. Ever. I don’t tolerate it from others, and I’ll always be honest with you. Zane needs uninterrupted sleep, and you will see him the moment Bones says you can. You have nothing to be ashamed of. You may not know much about Darling and the people who live here yet, but you’re going to love it. So, how about it? Will you introduce me to your friends?”

Well, she either trusted fate or she didn’t. And if she trusted fate, she had to trust her Viking, who had still given her no reason to doubt him. “Do you really want to meet them?”

He winked at her and grinned. OMG! Her Viking had dimples, and she loved dimples. “I don’t say things I don’t mean, fairy cat. It’s a waste of time.”

Well, alrighty then. If he wanted to meet them, who was she to argue? She pulled them out and introduced them. “This is my bumblebear, Buzzy. He’s been my friend the longest. And this is Owlbert. Zane gave him to me when I started college.”

She hugged her friends to her chest. Thank goodness, she could finally breathe again.

He smiled, and his eyes took on the most tender look. One that melted her heart and her panties. “Hello, Buzzy and Owlbert. It’s nice to meet you.”

“They said hi back. They also want to know how much longer until we get to your house.”

“Not too much longer. I like having space and room to breathe. I have a cabin on about fifteen acres of land.”

“Fifteen acres? Do you farm or something?”

He smiled. “Or something. It’s peaceful. A good retreat from the noise and chaos of the world.”

That sounded nice. After the past four years, she could use some tranquility in her life.

Before she could ask any more questions, he turned onto a tiny dirt road she wouldn’t have even noticed. It wasn’t even a real road. More like two parallel ruts fighting their way through a forest.

He stopped at a gate that could likely be used to keep people out of Fort Knox. When he claimed he valued his privacy, he wasn’t kidding.

Once he pressed the proper buttons on his phone, the gate opened, and they drove through. Law drove straight into the woods. Trees loomed on both sides. She had no idea how the branches didn’t scratch up the sides of his shiny black truck.

The forest closed behind them, yet at the same time, the path ahead opened up. A wide lane stretched before them, lined with oak trees whose branches canopied the way. It felt like struggling through the wardrobe to reach Narnia or discovering Wonderland on Earth. It was the most glorious place she had ever seen.

“It’s beautiful,” she whispered.

“I like it, too,” he whispered back.

Then she saw his cabin. They had vastly different definitions of what a cabin meant. In the middle of the woods, Law lived in a house unlike any she’d ever seen. She continued to take everything in as he parked in front of a large, free-standing shed. “Wait for me to open your door.”

She could only nod, still mesmerized by the structure before her. When he opened the door, her gaze automatically went to him. Her Viking looked almost boyish as he read her shock. Oh, that grin of his was doing dangerous things to her heart.

He nudged her chin up with his knuckle. “Better close that before you catch flies.”

Who knew Vikings had a teasing sense of humor? Slinging her backpack over his shoulder, he took Buzzy and Owlbert and cradled them in one arm as he helped her down from his monster truck. Holding her hand, he led her toward his unique home.

Although it was only one level, it was very spacious. One enormous room took up the same space as her home in California. How did she know it was one long room? Well, his cabin was constructed entirely of glass

Seriously. The living room was situated in the center of the house, with rooms of various purposes extending out to the left and right. The trees nearly touched all sides of the house except the front.

It's no wonder he made his house so hard to find. He lived in a freakin’ glass house! “I guess you don’t throw many stones, huh?”

He grinned. “Just wait.”

He led her inside, and the view from the interior nearly took her breath away. Even the ceiling was glass. The only context of being inside was the room's temperature. It felt as if they were still outside. The limited earth-toned furniture was arranged well and looked comfortable. His house wasn’t just in the forest; it was a part of it.

Columns rather than walls separated the space, so it was really like one large room until they reached his bedroom. Walls with a thick, sturdy door separated that room from the rest of the house.

“Are these the only walls in the house?”

He shook his head. “There are four other bedrooms, each with an attached bathroom and walls. Zane’s in one. You can choose any of the other three you like. Pick one now, then I have something fun planned for us that will help you stop propping your ears up with your shoulders.”

The grin again. And the dimples. Argh!

At least her room would have walls. Thank the Lord for small favors. He led her back through the house to the bedrooms at the other end.

Law paused at the open doorway of the first bedroom. “This is Zane’s room.”

Her heart clutched. “Can I look inside? I won’t touch anything.”

A frown erased his dimples. Had her words upset him? “Let me show you, kitten. Then you tell me if you think Zane will care whether you go into his room.”

He pulled her into her brother’s room while she struggled against the fear of intruding that threatened to swallow her whole. It was a wonderful room once you got used to the transparent walls. Neat and suited to a teenager’s comfort, with a desk, computer, and gaming system, she had no doubt Zane loved it. Law nodded toward the electronics. “He likes playing RPGs with Sawyer and his online friends. Now look at the table by his bed, fairy cat. What do you see?”

There was no blinking the tears away this time.

The last day she spent with Zane four years earlier, they had stopped at a department store to pick out new ornaments for that year's Christmas. What better way to celebrate Leon Day, the opposite of Noel Day, recognizing they were only half a year away from Christmas. She snapped a silly picture of the two of them, wearing two huge mismatched ornaments as earrings. Zane donned a Christmas stocking as a hat, and they both made goofy faces.

That picture, encased in a large gold frame, was the only item on Zane’s bedside table. Could a heart be filled and broken at the same time? He wouldn’t keep a picture like that by his bed if he hated her. Smudges dulled the frame and glass, fingerprinted evidence that Zane often held that picture.

Turning to Law, she threw her arms around his neck and clung to him, washing away four years of fear and pain with her sobs. Law said nothing; he simply lifted her in his arms, carried her to Zane’s bed, and sat holding her on his lap, rocking her gently and stroking her hair.

She had no idea how much time had passed while she sat on his lap. He didn’t rush her. They sat quietly after her tears stopped before he leaned forward and grabbed a box of tissues from Zane’s desk. Lovie held out her hand, believing he intended to hand the box to her.

Instead, he set the box down on the bed, took a few tissues, and held them to her nose. “Blow,” he said .

She pulled back and stared at him. Was he crazy? “Uh, no, thank you. I can do it.”

He pulled the tissues back. “Yes, but you’re not going to.”

When she lowered her hand -more out of shock than from compliance- he pressed the tissue to her nose again and repeated, “Blow.”

“I don’t want to. That’s gross.”

He didn’t respond. Holding the tissue in place, he waited, his eyes challenging her to outlast him. She had no illusions about winning the battle of wills that ensued, but battle they did until she predictably surrendered.

“Fine. But it’s still gross.”

“It’s not gross,” he said as she blew her nose into the tissues he held. “It’s you making me feel better by letting me take care of you. There. All done.” He stood, helping her to her feet and leading her by the hand back to the hall. “Three rooms left, which I cleverly named the Blue Room, the Pink Room, and the Green Room. Which would you like?”

Glancing back at Zane’s black bedspread, she took a wild stab in the dark. “Let me guess. Zane chose the Black Room.”

“I see that you're clever as well. What will it be?”

“I think I’ll go with the Green Room.”

His broad smile signaled approval of her choice. “Good girl. The green room is at the end of the hall. You can unpack and freshen up while I make us a quick lunch. After that, I have a game for us to play.”

Excitement sparkled in his eyes at the mention of playing whatever game he had in mind. She smiled. He was likely more of a chess player than a checker player. It was good that she liked both.

“Are there any foods you don’t like to eat?”

Looking down, she patted the rounded contours of her hips and bottom. “Does it look like there’s anything I don’t enjoy eating?”

His smile vanished. “I beg your pardon?”

Yikes! Okay then. Not a fan of self-deprecating humor. “Oh, um, sorry. I just meant?—”

“I know what you meant, Lovelyn. That’s one.”

The dark, growly voice had her bottom clenching. Was it hot in there? Because she suddenly felt the urge to melt into a puddle of need. “O-ne? Wh-what do you mean, that’s one? One what?”

“One warning. You do not have permission to speak negatively about yourself in any manner, especially regarding your appearance. I wouldn’t let anyone else say things like that about you, and I’m not about to let you do it, either. That’s even worse.”

“How is that worse?”

“Because you have at least some defenses against what other people say. If you’re telling yourself those lies, you subconsciously accept them without question. Don’t do it again.”

“But… but I didn’t mean anything. It was a joke.”

“Lying takes you directly to three, fairy cat. I’d be careful. You don’t know me well enough yet to reach three.”

All the moisture in her mouth and throat vanished. Well, not vanished, just moved lower in her body. Much, much lower.

But his voice was so stern. And that look on his face had to be the look she always read about in her books. It was the quintessential Daddy glare, and that was her only explanation for what happened next.

“Yes, Daddy—sir! Oh god, I meant, yes, sir. I have no idea why I said Daddy. Just forget I ever said it?”

Horror iced her entire body. At his expression, one she couldn’t read, she pressed her hands to her face. Her cheeks were so hot they must be radioactive. “Can you leave now so I can die of embarrassment alone? ”

He moved, but in the wrong direction. She backed away as he strode toward her. Pulling her hands from her cheeks, he held them both in one hand and tilted her chin up to look at him with the other. “Calm down, Lovelyn. That was my fault, and you hit the nail on the head. I am a Daddy. I can’t very well be upset with you for recognizing it. But that isn’t a conversation for now. For now, we eat and forget about everything stressful for a few minutes. Deal?”

She searched his eyes. Was he truly not upset with her? You should never call someone Daddy without permission. She really didn’t want him to be mad at her. People said they were okay when they weren’t. She should know. She did it all the time.

With no other choice, she nodded. “Deal. I’ll be in the kitchen in a few minutes.”

He studied her before turning back down the hall, calling over his shoulder, “Five minutes, fairy cat.”

She fell in love with her room at first sight. It felt like stepping into an enchanted glade in the forest. Although the walls were made of glass, Law had planted a climbing vine in the corners of the house outside, which had grown into a canopy of green that loosely wove up the walls and across the ceiling, leaving plenty of space to see the surrounding woods.

But he hadn’t stopped there. He’d also hung twinkling lights through the vines to enhance the mystical atmosphere. It would be even more spectacular at night and illuminate the room just enough that she could still sleep, but not be afraid of the dark.

A plush, moss green comforter covered the bed, settled in one of the corners, covered in dozens of pillows in all shapes and sizes. Outside the window walls, planters hung level with the bed. Though it was too early now, later in the spring and summer the view would be spectacular. Lovie had never had the opportunity to work with flowers, but she’d always wanted to.

Two open arches occupied the same wall as the entrance, one to a walk-in closet system, the other to the bathroom. As soon as possible, she planned to soak in the garden tub until she wrinkled up like a prune.

Skipping to the bed, she nestled Buzzy and Owlbert into the pillows. Noticing a remote on the desk on the wall opposite the bed, she couldn’t resist trying out the buttons to see what they controlled.

When she pushed the top button, Law’s voice came from a speaker on the desk. “I see you found the remote. Good, I was about to come get you. Your lunch is ready. I have cookies for dessert if you make it to the kitchen be the time I count to ten. No running in the house, though. You have time to walk if you start now.”

The speaker must have been voice-activated once you turned it on. When she said, “I’ll be right there,” he answered with, “Ten, nine.” Squealing, she headed back the way he’d led her when they first arrived.

Somehow, Law had taken a crazy, stressful, emotional day and made it better already. But he’d better be prepared, she was killer at chess.