Page 43 of Kiss & Collide (Racing Hearts #2)

T he last fucking thing Chase felt like doing was going to some sponsor party, shaking hands and making a lot of bullshit small talk.

But Rally Fuel was considering shoveling a shit ton of sponsorship money into his lap and no matter how he felt right now, business was business.

The party was at an upscale restaurant, and no expense had been spared.

The food was sublime, and the drinks were flowing, but he wasn’t interested in any of it.

He hadn’t seen or heard from Violet since that fight the day before.

If she’d been at the track for the race this afternoon, she’d steered clear of the garage.

It fucking figured. The first time he’d attempted to date someone since Sophie and he had to pick Violet Harper.

That was like choosing a wild animal as a pet.

When you did something like that, you had no business complaining you got bitten.

But he hadn’t chosen her. She’d just happened to him. She’d blown into his life and before he knew it, she’d filled up every corner of it, impossible to resist. All he could see, all he wanted, was her.

So here he stood in the middle of this crowded, loud party, every burst of laughter scraping across his nerves like broken glass, every polite smile and handshake seeming to last a thousand years.

She was gone and she’d left a hollowed-out shell in his life where she used to be.

His head felt thick and his eyes burned, like he’d been awake for weeks.

He’d forgotten just how miserable heartbreak could make you feel.

“Chase! Hi!”

He blinked, coming out of his fog, and turned at the mention of his name. Mira Wentworth was weaving through the crowd in his direction.

“Hi, Mira. What’s got you here?”

She hooked a thumb over her shoulder. “Dad. Rally’s one of our sponsors.” She peered over his shoulder. “Is Violet with you? City after city together and I barely see her.”

“No, she’s not. Why the hell would she be with me?” The words just fell out of his mouth, sharp, sarcastic, and unintended.

Mira blinked in surprise.

“Sorry,” he said, rubbing a hand over his face. “I didn’t mean—”

“Is something wrong?” she interjected. “What happened?”

He blew out a long, frustrated breath. “I wish I knew!”

Mira cast a quick look around them, then snagged his elbow and towed him through the crowd to an empty booth in the corner of the restaurant. When they were seated, she leaned forward on her elbows. “So, what’s going on?”

“I thought things were going okay. It got weird in Vegas when Ian showed up—”

“Ian?”

“That guy she used to date?” Had Violet really never told Mira about Ian? Did it mean anything that she’d told him about Ian? Who the hell knew? And it didn’t even fucking matter anymore.

“Is that his name? The rock star?”

Chase scoffed. “ Rock star . He wishes. But yeah, that’s him. And I thought she’d invited him, but apparently he just did that on his own. So she told Ian to go fuck himself and I got myself out of that weird situation with Madison, and we decided to give it a go. Me and her. A real relationship.”

Mira’s big green eyes got bigger. “You did? Violet did?”

“Yeah. And it lasted all of five fucking days.” Now that he’d started talking about it, he couldn’t seem to stop.

“I don’t know what happened. She turned so cold.

Last night I went to tell her about …” He broke off, remembering that as cool as Mira seemed, she worked for a rival team.

“Never mind. Team stuff I shouldn’t talk about. ”

“Maraschino cherry.”

He looked up at Mira and scowled. “Excuse me?”

“It’s what Violet and I say when we need to unload about something at work. Once we say it, we’re in a cone of silence. Nothing we say about our teams leaves the cone. So, I’m offering you the cone of silence. Nothing you tell me leaves this table.”

Despite how shitty he felt, he cracked a smile. “Okay, maraschino cherry. I’ve got … interest from another team. A good team.”

Mira nodded. “With your raised profile and the way you’ve been driving, I’m not at all surprised to hear that.”

“Thanks. So I went to discuss this with Violet, to debate the options—”

“What options?”

“Staying where I am? I mean, she’s worked so hard to turn me into this huge thing, and it was all to pull in sponsorship money, for the good of the team. I can’t just pull that out from under her.”

Mira smiled and tilted her head to the side. “That is so sweet, Chase. Unnecessary, but really sweet.”

His anger had already started to ebb, but Mira’s words lit it up again, throbbing and hot, like an open wound. “Well, Violet sure as fuck didn’t think so. She basically told me I shouldn’t factor her into any decision I make.”

“I’m sure she just wants you to take the deal that’s best for you.”

“She said strings were messy and that eventually I’d be grateful she cut them for me.

” Just saying it felt almost as bad as hearing it had been.

He hadn’t realized words could sting like that, like a whip cracking across his skin.

“And after I told her …” I love you . “… after I told her how much she meant to me.”

Mira winced. “Okay, I admit that wasn’t great—”

“I don’t know what I was thinking. She’s never made any secret of who she is and how she operates. I don’t know why I thought she might be different with me.”

“See, that’s the thing,” Mira said, leaning closer. “This isn’t how she is. I’ve seen Violet with men and she’s ruthless.”

He chuckled grimly. “Yeah, I know. I can still feel the shiv between my ribs.”

“No, Chase.” She reached across the table to grip his wrist. “I think you are different. Just the fact that you’re still here is different. How long has it been? Since you guys started?”

“Since I started at Pinnacle, sort of.”

“Violet is the queen of one-and-done. Nobody sticks around for months. Nobody .”

“But—”

“Look, she’s spent a long time keeping everybody at arm’s length. It’s probably hard for her to let someone in. Scary, too.”

“Violet isn’t afraid of anything.”

Mira shot him a look. “I know you don’t believe that.”

“Maybe not. But what does it matter? I put myself on the line and she fucking sent me packing. What am I supposed to do here?”

“Just don’t give up on her,” Mira said, her eyes all full of earnest pleading. “Not yet.”

With a sigh, he slid out of the booth and stood up. “Mira, look, I like you. And I’m glad Violet’s got you in her life. But I’m not the one who gave up. I tried. And she’s pushed me away over and over. I’m not waiting around to let her kick me in the teeth again.”

That Violet-shaped hole in his life felt like it was growing by the minute. He prayed it wasn’t permanent. Because it felt like the kind of loss he’d feel forever.

“Chase—”

He held up his hands to cut her off. “Sorry, Mira. I’m out.”

Then he turned around and left. Left Mira, and left the whole fucking party.

Because he really couldn’t handle another minute of talking about some mythical version of Violet, a version that cared about him, and wanted him as much as he’d wanted her.

Because it was pretty obvious that version of Violet was all in his head.