Page 42 of Kiss & Collide (Racing Hearts #2)

C hase was in the tiny office assigned to him at the track, changing out of his race gear after qualifying, when his phone vibrated with a call from his agent.

“Hi, Phil. What’s up?”

Most communications came via email and usually from one of Phil’s assistants. He wasn’t sure Phil had ever called him directly.

“Chase! How was qualifying?”

Phil never checked in to see how his races had gone.

“P twelve,” he said cautiously.

“Q two! Excellent, excellent. Listen, I just got off the phone with Antonio Cenelli. We’ve got official interest.”

Chase sat down hard on the folding chair behind him, blinking at the opposite wall. Fuck. This was actually happening. Allegri wanted him to drive for them next season.

He’d stopped by Allegri’s garage on Thursday, as asked. Eric had introduced him to Karl Aurbach, the head of design, and a handful of other Allegri team members. It had been a brief, superficial conversation, but now the legendary Antonio Cenelli, the owner of Allegri, had just called his agent .

“Now, there’s a long way to go between this and a formal contract,” Phil continued.

“But it’s a good sign that Antonio reached out to me personally to initiate the conversation.

I’m drawing up a list of items I think should be a part of any negotiation.

If you could let me know what you’d like to have included—”

“What about Pinnacle?”

“Pinnacle?” Phil echoed. “You’ve already got an offer from them—”

“I do?”

“Of course. There was a clause in your contract automatically triggered when you moved up from reserve. And they’d be fools not to re-sign you with the increased funding you’re bringing to the table. But they can’t offer you what Allegri can.”

“I know that.” He’d been so blown away by the idea that Allegri wanted him that he hadn’t even stopped to think about Pinnacle. But now, thinking about Rabia and Leon, the amazing new car Rabia was designing, the pit crew and staff who’d rallied around him this season … Violet.

He glanced at the mirror in the corner, at himself in Pinnacle’s “silver and pewter” race suit and imagined trading it for Allegri’s red.

Part of him wanted to scream in triumph at having made it, after all the struggles.

But it wasn’t all of him, and that was surprising.

This was much more complicated than he’d imagined.

“So start thinking about what you want out of this deal, Chase. This is the moment to think big.” Phil was still chattering, despite Chase having gone silent. “Feel free to ring me up if there’s anything you want to discuss.”

“Sure thing. Thanks, Phil.”

He ended the call and sat staring at his phone for several minutes. There were so many people he should probably call. Dad. Sam and Tyler. His grandmother and the aunts. But there was only one person he really wanted to tell first: Violet.

He needed to talk it through with her. She was so much smarter about this stuff than he was. She’d be able to pick through all this conflicting shit in his head and help him see it clearly.

He stood up, stripping out of his race suit and Nomex long underwear and changing back into his street clothes.

Grabbing his bag, he headed out through the garage.

The pit crew was there, still working on the cars ahead of tomorrow’s race.

Someone had put music on—something by the Stooges.

Seemed Violet’s musical taste had worked its way through the whole team.

The crew was talking and laughing as they worked.

The scene was a far cry from when he’d first arrived at Pinnacle, everyone silent, sullen, and distrusting.

Rabia and Leon were on the far side of the garage, heads together as they discussed something on Rabia’s laptop. Some other driver would be taking advantage of Rabia’s new design. He’d be in Allegri’s car, an undeniable marvel, but right now he didn’t feel that same thrill imagining it.

HE WAS LYING on Violet’s bed, hands behind his head, staring at the ceiling of her hotel room, trying and failing to picture what the next year of his life would look like, when the door clicked open and she came in.

His eyes skated over her appreciatively. She was wearing another one of her killer suits, this one in dark purple, with skinny pants that showed off her ass in ways that should be illegal.

She registered him on the bed, surprise showing in her eyes. “I thought you’d still be at the track,” she said, setting her bag down on the desk.

He watched her back as she fiddled with her things, plugging in her phone and pulling some stuff out of her bag.

Something seemed off about her, different from this morning in the bathroom.

When she’d come in just now, there hadn’t been even a hint of a smile when she saw him, and there was a tension in the set of her shoulders and the ramrod straightness of her back.

“You okay?”

“Yeah, fine,” she said quickly.

He sat up, swinging his legs over the edge of the bed. “I have something to tell you.” He leaned forward, propping his elbows on his knees. “It’s early still, but my agent got a call from Antonio Cenelli.”

She finally turned around to face him, eyes wide. “Does that mean …”

“They want me for next season.”

“That’s …” She looked down at the floor and hooked her hair behind her ear. “That’s excellent. Congratulations.”

This wasn’t the reaction he’d expected from her. Something was definitely off.

“Yeah, but I’m not sure.”

She leaned back against the desk and crossed her arms over her chest. “What aren’t you sure about? It’s Allegri .”

“I know. I should be ecstatic. And I am. It’s amazing. But—there’s Pinnacle to think about.”

Violet shook her head firmly. “No. Forget fucking Pinnacle. If you have an offer from Allegri you need to take it.”

The force of her pushback surprised him. She’d spent so much time and energy turning him into a star, all for the sake of Pinnacle. Now she was okay with just watching him walk away from all that?

“Violet, what about all your hard work?”

“What’s that got to do with anything?”

He stood up, running a hand through his hair. “Everything you’ve done for me, turning me into this big star, all the sponsorship money it’s brought in. You’re seriously okay with it walking back out the door to another team?”

“Your sponsorship deals are yours, not the team’s. That’s the deal. This is your career .”

“But … it’s more than my deals. Carillon, ILM, HeatTech … they all want to sponsor Pinnacle next season because of me. If I leave, that might not happen.”

Violet was clenching her teeth so hard he could see a little muscle in her jaw flexing. He could feel the tension radiating off her and he didn’t understand it. “What happens to Pinnacle isn’t your concern. You need to look out for yourself.”

He scoffed. “Come on, Violet. What happens at Pinnacle matters to me, regardless of where I end up.”

“Why?”

“Because …” He crossed over to her and touched her shoulder, picking up a silky lock of her black hair and rubbing it between two fingers. “Because it affects you. I care about you. You built this. Not for me, for Pinnacle. I’m not going to be the one to tear it apart.”

Violet squeezed her eyes shut and drew in a deep breath.

Chase was too close, and he was too … good , putting her first and looking at her like she was his everything .

Her, the girl who hadn’t had a relationship last longer than six hours in years.

Her, the girl who hadn’t even been able to save this fucking team.

She was going to fuck this up eventually. There was no way she wouldn’t. So why should he give up a single thing for her sake? And certainly not for the team’s sake. Pinnacle probably wouldn’t even exist in a few years, and he would have spent the peak of his career tethered to this sinking ship.

“Please don’t make me a part of this,” she whispered. She couldn’t handle that kind of pressure, couldn’t handle being responsible when his career was in tatters in two years’ time.

He scoffed, bringing his hands up to cradle either side of her neck.

His thumbs rubbed along the length of her jaw.

“Come on, Violet, you’re already a part of this.

I care about you.” He paused, pressing his eyes closed briefly and swallowing hard.

She could feel the words coming even before he opened his mouth. “I love you,” he murmured.

No, oh please, no. Not like this, not now.

She wasn’t ready for this. She couldn’t say it back.

She didn’t even know how to. That part of her had died years ago, and would probably stay that way forever.

She’d known that. It was why she didn’t commit, why she never let anything get serious.

It’s why she shouldn’t have tried this with him.

Because eventually it was going to end up here, and she knew going in that she wouldn’t be able to see it through.

Panic flooded her limbs, and adrenaline had her heart trying to beat its way out of her ribs. Her throat closed up around the breath she tried to draw.

Shoving at his chest, she pushed herself away from him. “Just stop.”

He jerked back in shock, and she had to turn away from that stunned look on his face, that pain in his eyes.

She rounded on him, trying to make him see. He needed to understand what a mistake he would be making … with Pinnacle. With her. “Listen to me. You need to take that fucking contract with Allegri. Get out of here and don’t look back.”

He blinked, those glittering dark eyes full of pain as he stared at her. A muscle in his jaw worked as he ground his teeth together.

“And you and me?” he finally asked, voice hoarse.

She couldn’t be a part of this. If he stayed here for her, he’d lose everything. She’d already made that mistake.

“I can’t do this … I thought I could, but I can’t.”

“But I thought things had changed.”

Yes, everything had changed. Her chest felt so tight that she could barely breathe. The panic felt so intense that she couldn’t even look him in the eye.

“I said no strings for a reason. Strings get tangled. You’re thinking about turning down Allegri for Pinnacle. That’s insane.”

“I’m thinking about turning them down for us !” he shouted.

“And I am cutting the fucking strings! Stop trying to make me what I’m not.” This is who she was. Hard, cold, unattached. Only capable of a one-night stand. No matter how much she may have wanted to believe otherwise.

He scoffed and shook his head. “Guess it was too good to be true after all, you committing to something. Some one .”

That hurt. Badly. But she didn’t let him see it, because he was exactly right.

“Believe me,” she said. “You’re going to look back and be glad.”

He took another step back and his expression shifted, and she realized that in all this time she’d spent with him, she’d never seen him truly angry at someone. It just wasn’t in his nature. Except that’s how he was looking at her now, so hard and cold.

She’d never felt this small and ugly before.

“Fine,” he spat, before he turned and headed for the door. “You don’t want to matter to me, Violet? Then fine, you don’t matter anymore. You’re free, just like you wanted.”

Then he jerked the door open and he was gone.

She stood in the same spot, unmoving, staring at the door he’d just disappeared through, for a long time. When her arms and legs could move again, she slowly sank to the floor, drawing her knees up to her chest and wrapping her arms around her legs.

It seemed that at some point in the past weeks with Chase, her bloody heart had started beating again. And now she remembered why she’d worked so hard to avoid that. Because it hurt like hell.