Page 53 of Keeping Kasey (Love and Blood #3)

CHAPTER FORTY-ONE

Logan

I can feel Kasey’s eyes on me, tracing each feature of my face.

Memorizing me.

It seems only fair to let her, since that’s exactly what I did when she fell asleep in my arms. But after several minutes, I can’t help myself.

“Didn’t your mom ever teach you it’s rude to stare?” I murmur, opening one eye in time to catch the red creeping into her cheeks.

“I wasn’t staring,” she lies.

“Sure you weren’t,” I say and kiss her temple.

She places her hands on my chest. “Well, good morning to you, too.”

“ That wasn’t my good morning,” I tell her, my lips slowly lifting in a wolfish grin. In one swift move, I’ve rolled on top of her, and my lips come down hard on hers.

Kasey moves like I’ve shot caffeine into her veins. She weaves her fingers into my hair, tugging me closer, and I savor every second of having her like this.

Mine.

“You know,” she mumbles between kisses, “last night didn’t really fix anything.” Even as she says the words, she tightens her hold on me.

“Good. We were always better broken.”

She laughs, and I swallow the sound with possessive kisses before trailing my lips down her throat to the base of her collar. My tongue swirls over her skin before I suck it into my mouth. She gasps, but doesn’t tell me to stop, so I take my time leaving marks on her delectable skin.

When I sit up, I take in the sight with a wide grin. The collection of purple and red marks—still glistening from my tongue—is the single sexiest thing I have ever seen.

“Now, that is a good morning.”

“My shirt better be able to hide those,” she says with a half-hearted glare.

“I’d rather they didn’t.”

“I’d rather not advertise your caveman tendencies.”

I lie down beside her, dropping an arm over her waist to pin her to the bed. “You could always stay here for a few days until the marks are gone if you’re more comfortable.”

Kasey’s eyes dilate, her breaths quicken, and her lips part. Watching the effect I have on her makes me want to indulge in a few more caveman tendencies, which she must see because she bites back a nervous smile.

Kasey leans in to kiss me before pushing herself to the edge of the bed. “I’ll take my chances. We should get ready to go. As it is, your siblings will have a field day interrogating you about last night.”

I fall back into the bed with a groan that makes Kasey’s laugh ring through the room.

“On second thought… maybe we could both use a day off.”

She throws a pair of boxers at me. “Come on, Mafia Boss. We have work to do.”

I keep one hand on the wheel and the other on Kasey’s thigh for the entire drive to the base. At first, I just wanted to touch her, but as soon as I noticed her shudder each time I stroked my thumb over her leg, I made it a game to see how many times I could get her to do it.

New record: eight.

I keep Kasey’s hand secured in mine the entire walk from the garage to Ford’s office. The gesture garners plenty of attention from my men as we navigate the halls of the base, but I don’t care.

At some point, I’ll have to answer questions about why the woman I declared an enemy four months ago is now walking hand in hand with me through the base, but not today.

Just for today, I’ll pretend that having Kasey is as simple as holding her hand.

When we get to the office, Kasey glances inside before turning her questioning gaze to me. “Where are Ford and Damon?”

I lift her hand to my lips and place a kiss there. “I imagine Ford is getting his coffee, and Damon is likely waiting in my office with the rest of my siblings.”

She looks between me and the office. “And you’re leaving me alone?”

I nod. “The office is yours for the day. I’ve ordered my men to stay out of this area. Ford will work in James’s office, and Damon will work in his, but he might stop by to check in. I thought you might enjoy the space.”

I don’t have time to study her expression because she throws her arms around my neck and brings her lips to mine.

“Thank you,” she whispers, pulling away with a wide smile.

“I almost forgot,” I say, reaching into my jacket to pull out her gun.

I’d taken it from my office when I went to get her phone last night, and I’m glad I didn’t give it to her any sooner. I have a feeling she would’ve shot me on my own lawn if I had.

And for some reason, that makes me smile.

This woman has me screwed in the head.

“I believe I owe you this,” I say. “Though, I do have to request that you refrain from using it. Especially on me.”

She beams as she takes it. “I’ll take your request into consideration.”

I press a lingering kiss on her temple, reluctant to let her go. “I’ll see you later, beautiful.”

My smile stays with me the whole way to my office.

Giving Kasey the trust I should have from the beginning has the strangest effect—like, somehow, I’m the one who’s been given freedom.

And I can’t help but hope it’s the first step toward fixing what we broke.

It’s not until my hand turns the doorknob that I remember the mob waiting for me.

James sits in one of the chairs across from my desk, Damon leans against a bookshelf, fiddling with a candle set, and Elise has made herself perfectly comfortable in my chair.

All of them straighten at my entrance—out of interest, not respect.

“What a pleasant surprise,” I deadpan.

“Good morning to you, too,” Damon says with dramatic exaggeration.

I flip him off.

“What’s wrong with a little family bonding?” Elise asks with an innocent expression that fools no one.

“I’m a busy man, Elise. I don’t have time for bonding .”

She smiles at my twin. “Then we’re lucky James cleared your morning schedule.”

I glare at James, who shrugs. “What happened last night?” he asks.

“I took Kasey back to the hotel,” I say, and round my desk, gesturing for Elise to move.

She does, but only as she and our brothers share a conspiratorial look.

“Are you sure that’s it?” James asks.

I fall into my chair with a sigh. “What are you really asking?”

“How long would you have let her attack you? I was ready to put money on her knocking you out,” Damon says with the same enthusiasm our nephew talks about martial arts.

“You spied on us?” I bite out.

He only looks between Elise and James like they’ll step in and save him.

“You all spied on us?”

Elise is the only one who looks even the least bit apologetic.

“You both left in such a hurry,” she defends. “We were only making sure you were okay.”

“And that required all of you?”

“It’s not like it was unwarranted,” James says. “She did start attacking you.”

“We were only concerned for your health,” Damon adds, and I flip him off again.

“We just want to know what happened,” Elise finishes.

“I don’t see how it’s any of your business,” I clip.

“When we’re mentally preparing to bury a body, it becomes our business,” James says in an even tone.

“And whose body were you prepared to bury?”

None of them meet my eye.

“I don’t have time for this,” I snap and point to the door. “Get out.”

Elise places one hand over mine. “Logan, we aren’t coming to you as capos. We’re coming to you as siblings. Especially now that you’re seeing Isabella, we just want to know where your head is at. That’s all.”

I scan their faces, all of which have sobered.

It strikes me that this is the first time I can remember just being with my siblings. Moreno, Matteo, or other capos tend to accompany us these days, and it’s oddly comforting to know that the people in this room care about me beyond my role as the Consoli boss.

I decide to tell them the truth—the same truth that I myself need to be reminded of.

“What Kasey and I have is an abundance of mistrust and unresolved anger issues. Whatever feelings may accompany those facts are inconsequential when the foundation of every interaction is a history that neither of us is ready or willing to forget. As far as Isabella goes…”

I realize then that thoughts of the Romano princess disappear completely when I’m with Kasey.

I’ve always known that not marrying Isabella would be disastrous for my family, but I also know without a doubt that if I were given the chance to marry Kasey, I would do it in a heartbeat—to hell with the consequences.

But it isn’t that simple.

Kasey and I may want each other, but building a future with someone requires a lot more than feelings, and all we share beyond that is animosity.

“I don’t plan to threaten our standing with the Romanos. I said I’d marry the girl, and I intend to keep my word,” I say mechanically. “I’ve never let my personal feelings dictate how I run this family. That isn’t about to change now.”

Technically, I’m telling the truth. As of right now, I intend to keep my word to Romano, but I reserve the right to change my mind until there’s a ring on her finger.

And thankfully, there is not .

If I thought I’d feel some amount of comfort in confiding in my siblings, I’m sorely mistaken.

All I feel is irritation and embarrassment.

I clear my throat before any of them can say something to make it worse. “Now, as great as it would be to take the morning off, that’s simply not possible.”

I open my laptop, pull up a picture, and turn it toward my siblings.

“Scott Bateman was found this morning holed up in a hotel in Ohio with a suitcase of cash he received for sabotaging us. I finally have him in the cellar, ready for interrogation, and would like nothing more than to learn who he sold information to so I know exactly who else needs to die. So, if you don’t mind, I’d prefer to cut family gossip short and do my actual job now. ”

James and Damon sober instantly. Business has to come first, especially in urgent matters like this.

“James, you’re going to the cellar with me. I need to finish reviewing the case file, but you can start prep. Damon, I want you to be available in your office if Kasey needs anything.”

They both nod and leave.

Elise, however, doesn’t move an inch.

“You know,” she starts, falling into the seat James was occupying, “I don’t think I’ve seen you this well-rested in months.”

“Moreno should fire you if that’s your attempt at subtlety,” I deadpan.

“I’m serious. I thought those dark circles were permanently etched under your eyes. It’s nice to know they aren’t.”

“What a relief. Can I get work done now?”

My baby sister’s glare is surprisingly lethal.

“I will leave you alone as soon as you answer a question.”

“By all means,” I say with a sweeping gesture, “get on with it.”

“What are you going to do?”

“First, I’m going to interrogate Scott, then I’m going to order a team to go apprehend whoever the hell he sold information to. After that, I have a meeting with the Terrell family to discuss Japanese gang activity—”

“That’s not what I mean,” she snaps. “What are you going to do about Kasey?”

I’m about to tell Elise to mind her own damn business, but when I look up from my laptop, I don’t see a meddling little sister—I see someone who went through hell and found happiness despite it.

I see someone who wants the same for me.

The notion is heartwarming but unrealistic. Still, it convinces me to indulge her.

“I’m going to survive her, Elise. I’m going to endure however long it takes her to get me that list, and then I’m going to move on with my life,” I tell her in a perfectly even tone that in no way reveals the distaste I feel for that particular course of action.

“Are you serious?” Elise sits up straight in her chair. “You’d let her go again?”

“I don’t remember letting her go before.”

“Chasing her out at gunpoint isn’t exactly an invitation to stay,” she says with a pointed look. “You can’t just let her leave.”

“I don’t have a choice.”

“You do have a choice, Logan. You ask her to stay. You fight for this. You fight for her .”

“Trust me when I say there’s plenty of fighting.”

“That’s not the same, and you know it.”

“Here’s what I know.” I lift my hand to tick off each point. “Kasey and I used to sleep together. She lied to me and left. I hunted her down, shot her only friend, and kidnapped her. She hates me, and too much has happened for that to change.”

“Have you even asked for forgiveness?” she asks, and my chest aches.

“I can’t,” I say on a resigned exhale.

“Why not?”

For reasons I cannot articulate, I tell my sister the truth.

“Because she might give it to me.”

Elise doesn’t ask the question, but her expression does.

“I wanted to kill Kasey the day I found out she lied. I was so damn angry. Then I spent months terrorizing her and treating her so horribly, only to find out that if I’d taken half a minute to listen to her, I might’ve saved us both from…

” I shake my head. “I can’t apologize. I can’t ask for forgiveness because there’s a chance she will give it to me, and I can’t even forgive myself. ”

Elise stands, rounding the desk with her perfectly sympathetic expression. She covers my hand with her own, and I let her—not hating the comforting touch.

“Kasey is not blameless, Logan. She could’ve told you the truth, and she chose not to. She could’ve sent you a letter or message explaining everything after she was gone. Instead, she chose to stay silent and disappear.”

“I thought you were Team Kasey . Now you’re against her?”

Elise rolls her eyes. “I’m just saying that you both hold blame for what happened.”

“And if that’s true, then what hope is there?” I ask with a humorless laugh. “If we just hurt each other and screw up over and over again, how can we ever make it work?”

Elise laughs, a knowing smile touching her lips. “ Life is screwing up over and over again. Love is fighting for each other anyway.”

When I don’t answer, she pats my hand and moves to the door.

“I know you’re a grown man who doesn’t need the advice of his little sister, but since you’ve indulged me this long, the last thing I’ll say is that I want you to be happy. Whatever that looks like.”

The door slams shut behind Elise, and I see what my happiness looks like with vivid clarity.

Waking up with my arms wrapped around Kasey. Driving to the base with my hand on her thigh. Teasing her until her cheeks turn my favorite shade of red. Meeting every one of her challenges in a battle of wills that ends with us in each other’s arms.

My happiness—my purpose —is her.

She isn’t a fling gone wrong… she never was.

I fell in love with Kasey four months ago, and I’ve loved her every day since.

Even when I hated Kasey, I loved her.

And I don’t see how I could ever stop loving her.