Page 38 of Just Another Meet Cute

But Mom strolled in as though she owned the place and booked a room like she did this every day. All I could do was wordlessly follow her. But not before I grabbed a couple of bottles of water and the whole plate of cookies to shove in my purse. And a few mints from the jar on the side.

The receptionist glanced over at me but didn’t bat an eye. The celebrities who came in here were probably on diets anyway. They didn’t need warm, heavenly smelling cookies in their lives. My mouth watered at the sweet and luscious scent.

After a couple of wrong turns—one that took us to the pet spa (yes, a pet spa)—we finally got to our room. When the door closed, Mom collapsed on the bed with a loud groan. Her face was fully pressed against the fluffy white pillow.

“Oh my God. I can’t believe I did that.”

Or at least that’s what I assumed she said. It was sort of hard to tell with her voice all muffled.

Finally looking a lot more like the mom I knew, I handed over one of the still-warm chocolate chip cookies. She shoved nearly half of it into her mouth and let out a heavy sigh.

Kicking off my shoes, I climbed into bed next to her.

I propped up a couple of pillows behind my back and popped a mint in my mouth.

It instantly melted into liquid spice on my tongue.

“I think you were great. Aunt Sarah’s probably still sitting in the living room in shock.

Actually, I know she is. Linh texted me. ”

For a brief second, Mom stopped chewing and smiled. “I know I should feel guilty for making her so mad, but man, that kind of felt good. Really good. And it was so long overdue. But I know I’ll regret it tomorrow. Like eating that last piece of double fudge cake last night.”

For once, I felt like the parent as I patted Mom’s arm. “It’s okay. We’ll deal with it later. Let her be pissed for the night, and we’ll go back home to grovel tomorrow.”

“But I don’t want to grovel.” The leftover cookie crumbled in Mom’s clenched hand. “She’s the one who was wrong. Sarah shouldn’t have talked about your dad that way. And especially in front of us. I had to say something.”

“Why?” I couldn’t help asking. “I mean, why now? Aunt Sarah’s been crapping on Dad for years. It’s her thing. But it never seemed to bother you before.”

Instead of answering me, she set the broken cookie pieces on the nightstand and brushed off her hands. “And you? Why did you say something first?”

I didn’t have an answer to that, so I shrugged like it was no big deal. “I just didn’t feel like hearing all that tonight.”

“Me neither. It bothered me. Always has. But I figured it was easier to stay quiet than start a fight.” Mom leaned back against the headboard beside me.

“But when you stood up to your aunt today … I don’t know.

It made me feel like I had to say something, too.

Like I owed it to you, to myself, and to your dad not to stay quiet anymore.

Especially when everyone’s been so wrong about him. ”

“What do you mean?” I turned to my side so that I would be facing her. The bed sunk with each of my movements like we were on a fluffy cloud. “And what did you mean earlier when you said that he didn’t do anything to you? That you did something to him?”

With a heavy sigh like all the air was collapsing out of her, Mom turned her head away.

Her cheeks were stained pink. “You know how your dad and I were … together, even though he was married. It just happened. I’m not proud of it, but I didn’t end it either.

And when I got pregnant, I was scared and … ”

She didn’t seem like she could continue, so I finished her sentence for her. “And you moved back to Austin with B á and Aunt Sarah, because Dad couldn’t leave his other family. I know.” We all knew this story. I didn’t know why she was telling me this again though.

Her voice was so low that I almost didn’t hear her at first. “He didn’t know.”

“What?”

“He didn’t know that I was pregnant. I never told him. As soon as I found out that I was, I ran away. I changed my phone number and shut down all my social media.”

Shoving myself upright, I stared at Mom in shock. “You ran away … and ghosted him?”

Her lips curved into a brief smile. “Pretty much.”

“But why?”

She tilted her head back and stared at the ceiling as if the answers were written up there.

“Because I was ashamed. Not of you. I would never be ashamed of you. But the whole time, I knew that I shouldn’t have been with your dad.

That we shouldn’t have had the affair. That we shouldn’t have let it go so far.

And once I realized I was pregnant, I couldn’t face him anymore.

I could barely face myself by that point.

The level of guilt multiplied by a hundred. A thousand.”

I still didn’t understand. “Because you were scared that he would leave you?”

“Because I was afraid that if he knew, he would leave his family for me .” Mom shook her head.

“I know it sounds stupid, but I couldn’t let him do that.

I already hated being the other woman, but I would despise myself if I was the cause of his broken family.

We didn’t even reconnect again until over a year after he got divorced. And that was purely by accident.”

There were so many thoughts whirling through my brain that it hurt to think. It felt like my brain was about to explode, and all I could do was focus on my breath and breathing at this point.

Everything that Mom said, everything I thought about Dad—felt about him—was a total lie.

Like Aunt Sarah, I blamed Dad for leaving Mom.

For abandoning us . And in reality, he didn’t.

He didn’t even know I existed. He wasn’t even given the chance to know.

And once he did know, he came right back into our lives.

On his own free will, after he left his other family.

He didn’t family hop. He didn’t change his mind on a whim . And he never told me any of this.

But then, it never occurred to me to ask him either. Most of the time I didn’t even try to talk to him. Not in the two years that he’s been in my life, because I assumed I knew everything.

I swallowed the lump in my throat. “But why? Why did you lie to everyone? Why did you lie to me?”

Her fingers played with the edge of the white comforter between us.

“I was scared, and I didn’t want your B á to blame me for running away.

It was easier to just say that your dad left us.

To make him the villain. She was still mad, but she also felt sorry for me.

And then you came along, and everything was okay for a while.

Perfect. But when you got older, I didn’t want you to get mad at me either, so I ended up keeping the truth to myself.

I didn’t think it would hurt anyone. Until I met your dad again. ”

“How did he find us?”

“We have a mutual friend who gave him my new number. And when he found out about you—” She broke off and sucked in her breath as her flush slid down her neck.

I didn’t think she could look any guiltier, but somehow, she did.

“He wasn’t happy. Especially when I told him that everyone thought he abandoned us.

But eventually he agreed to play along because I asked him to.

I think he was worried that I would take you and run away again. ”

Frustrated, I ran my fingers through my hair, both massaging and tugging it at the same time. “Okay, and why tell me now? What’s the point of telling me this when you hid it from me all this time?”

“Because it’s not fair to your dad. He’s not—he’s not the villain.

And I’m tired of seeing him treated this way.

Especially by you.” Her fingers were gripping the covers now.

“I thought things would get better once we moved to Houston with him. Once we were away from your B á and your aunt Sarah and started our own family. Then we could start over. But it hasn’t gotten better. You still haven’t accepted him.”

“Of course I haven’t.” My hand dropped to my side.

And the words poured out of me. Faster than I could even say them.

“And do you know why? Because I couldn’t let myself believe even for a second that I had an actual dad.

I’ve been so freaking afraid that if we let him into our lives he’ll disappear again.

Because what if he suddenly decided that he didn’t want to be in our family after all and ran off with another family.

Because he’d done it before. But no, wait, he didn’t.

He didn’t leave his other family to join ours.

He didn’t abandon us in the first place, because he didn’t even know about me . Because you never told him!”

I was practically yelling by the time I was finished. Something that I’ve never done to Mom before—to any adult. B á would have kicked my ass for being so disrespectful. Rude. Insolent.

But I think even she would give me a free pass if she were in my shoes right now.

I could feel Mom’s eyes staring at me, but I couldn’t look at her right now. I didn’t want to see her big sad eyes watching me. I didn’t want to forgive her. Not yet. Not when I felt this overwhelming guilt at how I’d been treating Dad all this time. How he must have felt.

Oh God, I should have gotten ice cream with him that day.

“I know it’s not fair—”

“None of this is fair.” Rolling onto my side, away from Mom, I tucked myself into a little ball and squeezed my eyes shut. “Just … leave me alone.”

Mom stayed in the same position for a long time before she got up.

She came around the bed and paused by my side for a few seconds before going into the bathroom.

I heard the water running for a few minutes, but I still didn’t open my eyes.

Not even to take out my contacts, even though I knew I would regret it tomorrow when they burned and were stuck to my eyeballs.