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Vex takes me back to the receiving room, the two of us slipping in quietly. We go to the private room and he takes back his cloak before he goes.

“Think about what I've said,”

Vex says, standing and leaving. “And about what you've seen.”

I know I will be able to do little else. Already I'm trying to work out what I should do. I can't stand back when it's obvious that so many are suffering, but I also can't commit to helping any rebellion when Alaric’s life hangs in the balance. The moment I act against the emperor, Alaric will be killed.

It is an impossible situation, and one that is not helped as I step out of the private room and I see Lady Elara there, sitting on a couch with Cesca beside her. It seems that Cesca is trying to get herself a new patron, after her failure with the previous two nobles. For a moment or two, Lady Elara seems interested as Cesca talks to her and shares wine, but then she looks over to me and stands abruptly.

Cesca looks hurt by that, and angry as she looks over at me. How is she the angry one when she's the one who betrayed me? Is this really going to be another rivalry within the colosseum? Another gladiator who will seek to target me wherever she can? Part of me wonders if I should have struck her down with my spear rather than tangling her in my net. The rest of me is shocked at the thought. Have I really reached the point where I will consider killing someone because it is more expedient than letting them live?

That is what this place does to us. It has made me into someone who will kill when the emperor commands it. Someone who enjoys the fame. Someone the version of me who was brought here from my village would probably barely recognize.

Lady Elara comes over to me. “Lyra, it is good to see you. Your partner in the last bout was keeping me company. She was just telling me that she would be all too eager to live up to all the rumors she's heard about you and me.”

She says it just loud enough for others to hear, and I see further embarrassment cross Cesca’s face. Lady Elara holds out her hand to me, leading me in the direction of one of the private rooms. I go with her even though she is not my patron. It's a moment that appears scandalous, as if she has just ignored Cesca pointedly for the chance to sleep with me. We head through into a room lined with silks and with a couch in the center, leaving Cesca to her embarrassment.

“You did well to survive her betrayal,”

Elara says, as she settles onto the couch. “Although people who didn't see her attempt to kill you clearly think that you betrayed her to get more glory by fighting two on one.”

The idea that people would think that of me horrifies me. I am not a traitor to my friends, do not betray people if they are not about to betray me or those around me first.

“You aren’t really interested in her, are you?” I say.

She shrugs. “I get the feeling that she is interested in anyone who will help her. I don't blame her, as you should not. She is at most an illustration of some of the things wrong here. Things we should be changing. The uprising is coming, Lyra.”

“Vex was saying something similar,”

I say. I want to know where things stand with Lady Elara and the spectral covenant. What their plans are, and how soon they intend to implement them. Vex means to act, and so, possibly, does Bella.

“Him,”

Lady Elara says, and her tone makes it clear that she doesn't like Vex. If I had any thoughts that they might be connected, those thoughts are easy to dismiss now. “He is not someone you should be spending time around.”

“He's my new patron,”

I say. “I don't exactly get a choice.”

If I had been given that choice, then I would never have met with Vex at all. But now… now I'm not sure if that's still true.

“The emperor held back every other offer,”

Lady Elara says. “Perhaps he will pay the price for doing so. He thinks that Vex is a most loyal noble, and that he is being as cruel as only a nobleman can with you as your patron. Instead he is engaged in intrigues, seeking to overthrow the emperor.”

“The same as you,”

I say in a whisper. It is not truly safe to discuss such things here but we have nowhere else now.

“He is not the same as me,”

Lady Elara insists. “His little group is not interested in making life better for anyone but themselves. They will punish the beast whisperers the same as the emperor. They are a group of nobles who have realized that they will never hold true power within the empire, and now they are looking for a way to put one of their number on the throne. That is all.”

Not so long ago, I would have agreed with her dismissal of Vex and his aims. Now though it all sounds worryingly similar to the kinds of things Lady Elara wants to achieve.

“And are you so different?”

I ask her.

She looks a little offended. “You really need to ask if I am different to someone like him. You know him. You know what he's like: arrogant, entitled, vicious when he needs to be. If he's charming, it's to get something.”

The trouble is, some of those qualities sound a lot like Lady Elara. She is undoubtedly charming, but there is always a point to it and a scheme behind it. She might not be as arrogant as Vex, but there is no denying that she is a noble woman, with all the expectations that the world will go her way that come with that. She is ruthless when she needs to be, and has encouraged me to be more ruthless, to embrace the more dangerous powers of the beast whisperers.

“What exactly are your intentions when… if you succeed in overthrowing the emperor?”

I ask her. “Will you free all the slaves of Aetheria? Will you feed the poor? You talk about change, but how much will you change things?”

She looks troubled. “Change is not easy. We will need to do things one step at a time. Once all the beast whisperers are able to step from the shadows-”

“This isn't just about the beast whisperers,”

I insist. How can she not see that it's so much bigger than that? That the problems of the empire touch so many more people?

“We are the ones who have been persecuted,”

Lady Elara snaps back. “Until we deal with that, we cannot deal with anything else. Until we put one of our number on the throne, we cannot be safe.”

“Meaning you?”

I guess. “How exactly do you plan to take the throne? What are your plans?”

“My plans? Can you not trust me?”

I shake my head. “I need to know. What are you going to do?”

“Do you want some pretty lie, or do you want the truth?”

Lady Elara demands. “Can you stomach a real answer?”

“Tell me,” I insist.

“The beast whisperers around the city will call to the creatures of Aetheria. We will bring them out in a tidal wave that will sweep over the city and destroy our enemies. You will bring the crowds roaring into the streets. That is what we will do.”

I can see how that would turn out. Beasts sent out in unchecked violence will cause carnage.

“That… so many people will die!” I say.

“They deserve it!”

Lady Elara snaps back. “This city is filled with people who have hated our kind. Who cares if a few of them die? We cannot rebuild this city until the old order has been reduced to ashes!”

The violence in her tone takes me aback. I had been thinking that Lady Elara’s rebellion might be the more reasonable choice of the options available to me, but now… she sounds as if her approach will be nothing but a slaughter.

“Has all of this just been about revenge for you?”

I demand. “I thought you wanted me to help you make things better.”

She doesn't quite push down this look of anger. “You should show a little more gratitude, Lyra. I have done so much for you. I have trained you. I have sought to protect you. And yet, now you're questioning my intentions. You should show a little more loyalty to your own kind. Do you think anyone else will protect us? Do you think Vex will?”

I go to answer that but she waves the attempt away.

“No, don't bother. I find this far too tiresome. I'm sure once you've had a chance to reflect, you realize what the correct side in all of this is. You will remember that you are where you are for a reason.”

“To stir up the people on your behalf,”

I say. “To keep them on your side. And the moment I do anything like that, Alaric dies.”

Alaric and so many others. I think of the people I saw on the street with Vex. How many of those people will be killed in this violence?

“People are going to die,”

Lady Elara says, as if it's simple and obvious. “He’s just one more noble among the rest of them. The first place the beasts will go are the noble houses. When they are ripped out of the city, maybe we can start again.”

“You… you’re insane.”

“If you think that, then you are a fool,”

Lady Elara says. “I only hope that when you think about it, you will come to a better conclusion. Now go please. It is worth the risk of being seen spending time with you when I think it might achieve something for the good of the city, but when all it does is irritate me further… no. Out.”

She dismisses me the way she might any other servant. Because I suspect that that's all I am to her. I suspect I'm a tool to be used to get the ends that she desires. Do I think she would be a better ruler than Vex? Than the gangs under Bella? Probably. Do I want to upend the entire empire, to risk Alaric’s life just so that she can slaughter half the city on her way to the throne? That is a very different question.

“Oh, and send the young woman, Cesca in when you go,”

Lady Elara says.

That is a very pointed thing to do. It is her way of showing how angry she is with me. It is the kind of thing that, if we were actually lovers, rather than working together against the empire, would be a deliberate insult, a slap in the face as she chooses someone else. The rumors will all say that's what's going on, that she has put me aside. It's her way of pushing me away, and I go.

Little by little the choices are becoming clearer. The trouble is none of them are good ones. The groups seeking to overthrow the emperor all seek different things but mostly they want to put their own people on the throne. Vex offers a version of the old order that promises to be every bit as brutal as the current emperor. Bella offers the chaos of the gangs if she is not contained. Lady Elara wants to unleash a torrent of beasts to ravage the city, then rule in the aftermath. That will create simple chaos, in which too many people will die.

There has to be another way through all this, but I cannot see it.