Page 114 of In Doubt

He’s right. Getting mixed up with me and my pack has landed a whole heap of trouble on her head and messed up this trip and her chance to claim that prestigious research spot.

“You’re right.” I turn toward the hotel exit. “Come on,” I tell the others. “I know what we need to do.”

29

Giorgie

“Are you sure I can’t convince you to stay?” Sia asks me as we watch Ric load my bag and his into the boot of the taxi.

“No,” I answer her with what I hope is a convincing smile. “I think this is for the best.”

I tried calling and messaging Jake. For precisely three seconds, I even considered messaging one of his packmates, Levi perhaps.

But then reality came crashing down. He’s ghosting me. Of course, he is. Which means his packmates will be too. I know how packs work, pulling together.

I can hardly blame him or them. After the chaos I laid at their doors, after my stupid idiocrasy with my suppressant pills, after my heat lost him precious days away from the dig site and then went spectacularly wrong.

He doesn’t want anything to do with me.

Sia was wrong.

I was wrong.

Sia wraps her arms around me. “I think this is a big mistake, Giorgie, and this trip will be shit without you.”

“Send me loads of photos OK?” I tell her, although I know each one will make me sick. Regret twangs in my gut. But it’s too late to change my mind now. Not when I’ve dragged Ric all the way out here to take me home.

“Ready?” Ric asks, and I pull back from Sia. She squeezes my hand one last time. Then embraces Ric.

“I’ll see you when you get back,” I try to say cheerfully before climbing into the car.

I try not to think about how happy I’d felt on the journey from the airport. Excited, thrilled. My whole body buzzes with energy. I’d lapped up every sight beyond the window.

On the journey back everything beyond the window is a blur. I hardly see it. And I think I’m the saddest I’ve ever felt, my heart like a heavy, painful weight in my chest.

Ric wraps his arm around my body and I rest my head on his shoulder.

“Are you OK, Cucciola?” he asks me, kissing the crown of my head.

“I will be,” I tell him.

I’ve gotten over heartbreak and disappointment before. I can do it again.

Only this feels worse. Deeper than before. That man had hurt me – left me unable to trust and full of doubt. But the pain hadn’t been like this. A pain that sears right into the very heart of me. That leaves me struggling to breathe.

Is it the disappointment? Of abandoning the dig, and my research? Of potentially kissing goodbye to that research spot? Is that it?

I don’t think so. I think it’s the alphas I’m leaving behind. The ones who don’t want anything to do with me.

At the airport, Ric fetches our bags and we stroll inside, scanning the information boards until we find the right desk. We’re booked into first class so there’s no waiting in line. We check in our luggage and collect our boarding passes.

The airport bustles with people, families crowding around with piles of suitcases and business people hurrying in all directions. The bright Egyptian sun streams through the window and reflects off the metal desks, dazzling my eyes, and the aroma of a million different scents hangs in the heavy air.

“We might as well head through security to the first-class lounge,” Ric says. “They’ll be champagne.” He bumps his fist against my arm, trying his best to cheer me up. “Or I can get them to make you a strawberry milkshake. You used to live on those when we were kids.”

I manage a smile. “I haven’t had one in ages. Think they’d add a shot of tequila to it?”

He chuckles. “How about we get wasted on this flight home, Cucciola?”