CHAPTER FIFTEEN

ICEMAN

T he beer flowed, and the party raged on.

Saint downed an ungodly amount of the cocktails Gopher poured like a professional, but then, she was a rock star, so of course she could handle her booze.

Sophie couldn’t keep up, and she had her two young girls, so she and Atlas bowed out early, along with Abe and Iris, who valiantly put Wilder to bed, which was good of them considering the kid was a lunatic.

Cara, Kennedy and Breaker, and Tristan stayed along with Anna and Hendrix. Will took JT upstairs to his room for the night, but honestly, he needn’t have bothered; the kid could sleep through a hurricane.

Eventually, the boys in the band came back with the club girls under their arms, and everybody looked mighty satisfied with themselves.

Saint asked if they wanted to jam, and they agreed, so everyone who wanted to play went off and got their guitars and instruments.

Harmonicas and even a banjo made an appearance, so everyone was set.

Kady and Diablo sat on stools next to Saint, while Hendrix set up a couple of mic stands next to the Saint’s Rapture boys. Trick had a fucking fiddle in his hand and took his place among the players along with Rockabye, K9, and a couple of others.

A lively discussion ensued about what songs they were gonna play. Saint suggested tracks that were guitar-driven, seeing as that was the predominant instrument within the group, and everybody agreed.

Saint wanted to hear Kady sing, so they settled on a 10,000 Maniacs song that the kid could sing and play from memory, because it was one of Kennedy’s favorites.

Saint bent down to watch Diablo position his fingers on the fret, then helped him move them around, talking him through the transitions.

“The intro’s easy, honey,” she began. “A, D, G, D.” They began to discuss terms like Dsus4.

I started to zone out, mainly because I didn’t have a fucking clue what they were talking about.

Somehow, my attention turned to Jonny J, whose gaze was fixed on Saint while she taught Diablo the chords he’d need.

A soft look moved across his face as he studied them, and my stomach clenched with unease.

I suspected Jonny’s expression mirrored the same one on my face when I looked at my woman, but in all fairness, she was acting cute with my club brother by taking him under her wing.

Saint was a little drunk and a lot chatty, and she kept whispering things to Diablo that made him laugh, I assumed to put him at ease.

I fucking loved that about her. In her mind, it was never about her; it was always about the other person and how she could make them feel at ease around her.

She wanted everybody to treat her like everyone else and never looked down on people, including Diablo, who was a good, decent guy, but also a little loopy, as evidenced by the human body parts he kept in his room.

When he first came to the club, he was an oddball who never quite fit in, but he was still loyal to the core and held a love for the brotherhood that couldn’t be denied.

I suspected it was the fact that he kept a degree of separation from the men that convinced Hendrix to give him the Sergeant at Arms patch.

An SAA needed to discipline the men and keep them in check.

The social cues that Diablo either missed or ignored set him apart from everybody else.

Plus, he was a big, tough motherfucker who could beat the fuck out of most of the men with one hand tied behind his back, so that helped Drix in his decision-making process, too.

D acted the fool, but was a lot more calculated than people gave him credit for.

He took risks but only when he was certain he’d get away with it.

I’d always wondered what happened to Diablo to make him tick the way he did.

He didn’t go to therapy sessions and never spoke to anyone about his Army career, which by all accounts was a prestigious one.

At night, you could often hear some of the guys wailing and fighting their demons in their sleep, but never D.

He seemed at peace with himself and his past.

I didn’t doubt he’d talk when he was ready, but until then, Diablo seemed happy in his own crazy and weird world of chopping off people’s body parts and storing them in jars filled with embalming fluid that he lit up like Christmas decorations.

Fucking lunatic.

My stare flicked back to Jonny, noticing he was still fixated on my woman.

Possession reared up inside me, and I almost got up out of my chair to tell him to put his eyes back in his head, and his tongue back in his mouth, because he was panting after Saint so hard.

What stopped me was the hand that rested on my shoulder as a presence took the chair beside me.

“He’s a little bit in love with her, but he’d never go there.” Talia’s voice was low, so only I could hear her when she relayed, “Now look at Boomer and Sam. ”

With my pulse racing already from the way Jonny was looking at Saint, my eyes slid to the other two men, my heart jolting when I saw the exact same soft expressions on their faces as they glanced over at Saint while she gave Diablo a crash course in guitar playing.

“All three of them are a little bit in love with her,” Tally murmured.

“Boomer won’t ever go there; he’s like her brother, and honestly, I’m surprised Sam did, seeing as he has no patience and hates rejection in any form.

Those boys made a pact between themselves when the band first got together that they wouldn’t pursue anything with Saint because, more often than not, when it comes to bands, romantic entanglements don’t end well.

” She glanced at me, giving me one of her rare smiles.

“They were right. I don’t know of one band romance that survived past the second album.

Music heightens emotions, and when you add on the crazy schedules, the groupies, the party lifestyle, and the exhaustion, it’s damned near impossible to make it work.

Still, it doesn’t mean you have to do it alone.

Sometimes, a person”—she smiled—“ the person comes along who you’d give it all up for in a heartbeat.

Except, if that person is truly the right one, they’d never allow you to.

” Tally nodded toward Saint, who had settled back in her chair to make sure her guitar was tuned.

“She’ll offer to do that one day, and maybe, for a while, it may seem like the perfect solution.

You’re gonna get separated because that’s the nature of the beast, or she’ll get papped at a weird angle with another guy that looks like something it isn’t.

Shit will happen, and rather than lose you, she’ll offer to walk so she can keep you.

But have no doubt, she’ll waste away if she does.

One day she’ll wake up and it won’t be Saint anymore, at least not this version of her. ”

“You shouldn’t judge me by other dude’s standards,” I advised her .

“So, what happens when the separations become too much?” she challenged.

My eyes slid to meet hers. “I leave the club. I give it all up for her .”

Her eyebrows drew together thoughtfully, and she studied me. I could almost see her mind ticking over behind her eyes, “I’ve never witnessed anyone look at another person the way you look at Saint. It’s like you’re drawn together every time you’re in the same room. It warms my cold, dead heart.”

I chuckled. “Good to know you’ve still got one.”

“Oh, don’t you worry. It’s still there.” She smiled wryly.

My eyes fell on my woman, and my lips curved as I studied her laughing with Kady and Diablo.

“She saved me. I fell hard the night we met, and I never forgot her. Reconnecting and sorting our shit made me realize that she’s my missing piece of the puzzle.

I’m gone for her again, hook, line, and sinker, but I’m determined that we’re gonna fall in love right this time. ”

She cocked her head slightly. “That’s very... poetic.”

I nodded to where Saint and Kady giggled with their heads together. “She’s the poet, and it inspires a side of me I never knew I had. She brings out a softness that, before, I always thought was a vulnerability, except I don’t anymore. I see it now; you can’t find light without casting shadows.”

She turned back toward the band. “That’s pretty profound.”

My throat thickened with every sliver of emotion in my soul. “It’s the way I feel.”

A huge smile spread over Talia’s face. “Protect her.”

My gaze went back to my beautiful woman. “Always. ”

“She’ll die for you.”

I took a swig of my beer and placed it back on the bar. “I’ll never let her ‘cause I’ll die for her first.”

Talia squeezed my shoulder again. “Good.”

The bar stool beside mine scraped across the floor, and I turned to see Breaker deposit a very drunk Kennedy on it. He grabbed the one next to it and immediately pulled it close to Ned’s before he sat down and wrapped his arms around her.

Kennedy looked at me and Talia with glazed eyes before announcing, “I’m lit.”

“Everyone’s drunk, babe,” I assured her. “Right about now, you’re one of the most sober ones in the room. Saint’s so wasted that she’s a little bit in love with Diablo the cock chopper, and even Talia’s all up in her feelings.”

“It’s those fuckin’ cocktails,” Breaker rasped, shooting Gopher, who was serving someone down the end of the bar, a glower.

Kennedy waved a hand dismissively. “Oh, stop pretending like you care, golden boy. You know I get dirty when I’m drunk. You don’t fucking complain then.”

My ears pricked up.

Breaker’s glower turned into a wolfish grin.

Talia laughed.

Three hollow taps sounded from Jonny J as he thwacked the wood on his acoustic guitar, and Boomer immediately came in strumming the opening chords to a song I recognized but couldn’t place.